Mother's letter to daughter that we all need to read

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"Don't apologise for being who you are. Be brave and bold and beautiful. Be unapologetically you."

This is the message a mum wrote to her young daughter, urging her not to apologise for being herself.

Toni Hammer, writer behind the blog, Is It Bedtime Yet?, uploaded the letter to her daughter to Facebook and it's gone viral.

The post's been liked 1,500 times, shared 1,800 times and received more than 130 comments.

In the letter, she tells her daughter not to "apologise when someone else bumps into you" and "don't say "sorry for be such a pain." You're not a pain. You're a person with thoughts and feelings and deserves respect".

She goes on to tell her daughter to "order the damn pizza" and not just eat salad if others are around.

"Don't keep your hair long to make someone else happy," Ms Hammer wrote.

"Don't wear a dress if you don't want to."

She urges her to take herself out and have experiences by herself and for herself.


"Don't hold back tears. Crying means you're feeling something that needs to get out. It's not a weakness. It's being human," she said.

"Don't smile because someone told you to.

"Don't be afraid to laugh at your own jokes."

And most importantly she says: "Don't hide your opinions. Speak up and speak loudly. You should be heard."

And her words hit a nerve with older women too.

"Wow. I love this! I'm an adult woman and I STILL need to hear this and work on it!" said one commentator.

"I freaking love this. I need to remember these things too!" said another.

Ms Hammer told Babble she wrote the letter after her daughter began kindergarten and she remembered her own experience.

"I was picked on a lot in school and I was projecting my fears and experiences onto her… (and while) she's got friends and things are going great part of me still worries about that first time she is made to feel less than…so I wanted to put something on paper…something that (reminded her that) it's not everyone will like who we are and that's okay," she said.

"It's not our job to please everyone.

"It's our job to be true to ourselves".

She said young women needed to feel empowered to back themselves.

"Not everyone is going to like you and that's okay," she said.

"Your role in life isn't to win the approval of everyone in the world.

"Your job is to be kind to others, do your best, fight for those who can't fight for themselves, and be exactly who you are because the world needs you and all you as an individual have to offer."