Kylie Orr
For the most part, I have little sympathy for celebrities bleating about how hard their lives are. I figure the personal trainer, chef, nanny, chauffeur, cleaner, gardener, psychologist, stylist and other hired help, all ease the apparent stress that comes with copious amounts of fame and money.
That was, until I saw a photo of Nicole Kidman and her father taking Sunday Rose for a walk (see Photo 12). Nothing too unusual about it apart from the guy hovering in the background with his camera; just another paparazzi doing his job, trying to get a shot that will sell. I'm not sure why it was this photo that sparked my concern - I've seen hundreds of celebrity photos over the years, as well as news footage, and documentaries which illustrate the lack of privacy experienced by famous folk. Normally, my care factor hovers around zero.
Strangely, this was the first time I'd considered the impact this constant intrusion would have on their lives. In this particular case, I saw a little girl and her grandfather - neither one choosing a life of fame yet they cannot enjoy a casual walk to the park without an entourage or a battalion of paparazzi recording their every step. Nicole is a mother like the rest of us, trying to do the best job she can, I would imagine. Sure, she has the bonus of fortune and most likely a helluva lot more help than the rest of us, but boil it down and I'm sure she worries about the same things we all do: Has Sunday had enough to eat? Will she sleep the whole night tonight? Am I spending enough time with her? What would be the best school to nourish her and help her learn and grow?
In addition, she has some questions I'll never have to ponder: How do I protect her from overexposure in the media? How do I normalise her life and offer her a simpler upbringing like I had? Is having a child called Sunday and a sibling called Faith making a particular statement?
The idea that if I left the house to do the school run wearing trackie daks with unidentifiable stains and undies that had lost their elastic, only to see it splashed all over the news the next day, fills me with horror. Trackie-dak-wearing without judgement is a true freedom celebrity mums are not afforded.
How about a public slip up like Britney Spears who nearly dropped her son when she tripped on a curb a couple of years back? A motherhood mishap earns her the gong of worst mother in the world as the fall is caught from every angle thanks to that team of photographers poised and ready. It seems when you're a celebrity mother, you're not allowed to trip.
The media obsesses over celebrity baby bumps and baby names, post-baby bodies and the ridiculous array of designer garb they clothe their children in. Imagine living under that level of scrutiny? As mothers we beat ourselves up enough over minor issues, like forgetting it was free dress day at school, but we don't have to deal with an international audience of critics.
When I was throwing the idea of this article around, I engaged the services of google and typed in "would you be a celebrity mum?" Here's just some of the gems that came up:
* A poll: Which celebrity mom would you choose to babysit your kids for an afternoon? (In case you were interested, Jennifer Garner comes in first, followed by Reese Witherspoon, and then ('none of the above' a close third!).
* Celebrity Mum of the Year competitions, with this pearler of a quote from a UK site "In a twist of fate Coleen Rooney, who had held the number one spot for most of the voting, was knocked off the top by Holly in the final days. Coleen's recent luxury holiday to Dubai without baby Kai by her side seems to have led to a sudden drop in her popularity."
You couldn't possibly be mother of the year if you [gasp] took a break without your child?! Tut tut celebrity mum, Coleen. Whoever you are.
Some will say, the famous have to suck up the bad to get the good. These celebrities want exposure when it suits them - promoting their latest flick or endorsing their favourite clothing label - yet they want a private life too. For me, if someone offered a week in the parallel universe that is celebrity motherhood, I'm not even sure I'd pull a Linda Evangelista and refuse to get out of bed for anything less than $10,000. Now if someone gave me a sleep-in, I'd take that for free!
Would you like to be a celebrity mum? Do you empathise with the caged bird existence they lead?
Comment on Kylie's blog.
