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To have another child or not?
your advise please


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3 replies to this topic

#1 manda-n-elvie

Posted 24 March 2013 - 09:18 AM

I am already a mother (32yrs old) of a healthy Mr 5 yr old and Miss 2.5 year old, after a misscarriage in the middle.  Since having Miss 2.5 I have studdied and gained great employment howver I've always wanted more and now Husband (48 yr old) is bringing more children into almost every conversation even using that look.... I haven't got rid of any of the baby equipment or clothes - i knew I wasn't ready however I don't think it is a wise financial decission with childcare and the thought of ever buying a house.

I just want to throw the thought out their, my friends are all work collegues and i'm not ready to discuss this with them and as my job is so rewarding i don't want to jepodise that, i am in need of advise to have a third or to get councilling?

#2 axiomae

Posted 24 March 2013 - 09:23 AM

No advice - I'm in this boat with just thinking about a second!

#3 w-emma

Posted 27 March 2013 - 04:18 AM

I highly recommend counselling: it was great for us.

#4 PinkCherryBlossom

Posted 27 March 2013 - 09:41 AM

I guess it comes down to priorities and what feels right for you both.  

Perhaps you and your partner could each make a list of your goals for the next few years (buying a house, holiday, another child etc.) and then you can sit down together and compare them.  Work out which goals you share, which ones you don't, and then have a discussion about how you can prioritise them and make up a basic timeline.  E.g.  Work for 2 more years to save money for house deposit, then try for baby.  If you find it difficult to discuss this with your partner, then a neutral third party in the form of a counsellor would be a great idea.

We are only now having our third baby (5 years after DD was born) because we agreed that our main priority was to finish buidling our house before we tried for another child.




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