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Homebirth mums and mums to be #4

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#26 Turps

Posted 07 February 2005 - 12:48 PM

Hi Ladies
I was just wondering if there is a www site or what info I could get for a friend of mine, she is pregnant with her first and has decided that a homebirth is what she is going to have.Her dh and herself are very excited about this they have always been into all things natural and healthy and the idea of a home birth is all part of who they are so I was hoping that someone could point me in the direction to for them to organise what she is after.I'm thinking her mother will possibly be main midwife as she is a highly regarded nurse/mid wife who had delivered many a baby (though in hospital)

So if you think you could help me point them please pm me with any info I could need.

Thank you all in advance.You sound like a wonderful supportive group of ppl original.gif

#27 sunbunny

Posted 07 February 2005 - 02:43 PM

Hi ladies,

Thought I'd drop in and say Hi, never seem to have a chance to reply to mails here and when I do they are out of date!  So congratulations Michelle, and also Larissa, I've followed some of your mails over the years here, and it's great that you have maintained such a positive attitude about your body and it's ability to birth despite the setbacks you've had.  

I work as a midwife in Adelaide, and am a homebirther too, and as a representative of the birth consumer groups here wanted to invite you all to come and visit us at the Parents babies and childrens expo this weekend.  The Birth Network have a stand, complete with birthing pool and video of gorgeous birth photos for you to see.  

Hope to see some of you there!


DS Sam 30/01/99 10lb
DS Jake 30/07/01 10lb 3oz
Both born peacefully and safely at home....Babies are born, pizzas are delivered!

#28 philippa

Posted 08 February 2005 - 03:17 PM

Michelle- Wow what a terrific story. How wonderful you must feel. Congratulations!!

Birth Buddies
Holding the Space
DD 15/4/03 C/S
DD 19/11/04 VBAC

#29 rachelP

Posted 09 February 2005 - 08:41 PM

I remember you from the very start of this thread when I was pregnant with my first babe (now 2 1/2) and you've had to wait all this time. You have really made my day. original.gif BIg hugs and congratulations to you.
Are you wanting a homebirth?

#30 Shebee

Posted 12 February 2005 - 02:55 PM

Hello all! It is always so uplifting to drop in here, with wonderful stories and people supporting each other so abundantly!

Larissa, huge congratulations on your bub-to-be! Sorry, I cant help you with a midwife in your area. I contacted mine at 4.5 weeks. She laughed when I said I was due but was still more than happy to come out and meet us and hang around chatting for a couple of hours!

Turps - You didnt say which state you are in. Do a google search for Homebirth Australia. I think the Sydney group are Homebirth Access Sydney and Victoria is the Maternity Coalition. I wouldnt know about the Mum doing the homebirth though. I think I'd want someone specifically experienced in homebirth as it is very different to hospital birth. I think I'd be more inclined to just want my mum as a support person. Thats just me though.

Well, I am still so excited about having a homebirth. Fingers crossed that it all goes smoothly and to plan over the next 7 (?) months or so. It is just such a wonderful thought to be able to give birth here, where I am comfortable and safe, with my family around me to share this most intimate event.

As amazing as it was, my first birth in hospital was not emotional, not outwardly anyway. I think because we were surrounded by complete strangers neither DH or I was comfortable expressing our emotions.
I think at home it will be very different. I think we'll be safe and comfortable enough to really express what we're feeling and I hope I'll be able to connect with DH in a way that I wasnt able to last time.

Looking back it seems so crazy to me, that at that time, where I was most vulnerable and experiencing the most intimate event of my life, I was surrounded by strangers. It is so crazy that women are expected to be ok with that. Because really, I wasnt ok with it.

Thank you all for being here and affirming that there is another way and that it is not me that's crazy (or just too sensitive), that its the system.

LOL, Oh here I am getting all emotional again, I love being pregnant and having an excuse for it!

Hope you're all having a fabulous weekend,

Me 29
dh 32
DS   Sebastian 16th Feb 2002
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#31 TamMal

Posted 16 February 2005 - 10:54 AM

Hi everyone,

I have been meaning to pop in here for ages, but just haven't quite managed it, and haven't been arounf EB for the last month anyway...

I am currently 16 weeks, current EDD is August 2(ish) and will be having a homebith in Adelaide. I am very excited about it, but to me it alo feels very natural and when people ask me "Where are you having your baby?" I always think "Home of course..." but I leave the "of course out when I answer....and everyone is always so awed and usually say "Aren't you brave?" but to me it just feels normal...

I had been a bit worried about if I did need to transfer to hospital and whether i would get a sesitive Ob if I did. The good news is that Dr Peat at WCH has agreed to be a back-up for me (after some initial stufing around) and he comes highly recommended by my midwife.

I'm interstate at the moment, my last trip home to NSW before bub comes...only I have discovered that bub doesn't like plane travel too much and like train travel even less...which provoked 3 days of "morning" sickness the like of which i thought I was over!!! Seems to have passed now though...but now I have a cold which isn't too nice. Went to my mum's doc yesterday...normally would have left it but since i am preggers and flying tomorrow thought I better get checked. Anyway she confirmed that it was just a virus and there was little point in antibiotics etc.

But...she found 2 red marks in my mouth and started freaking out a bit saying I should have blood tests...well i have a pretty major phobia of needles and don't submit to blood tests unless *I* decide that I think they are necessary and worthwhile, on the advice of the doc. So far both my GP and my midwife have been happy for me not to have any blood tests because I know all my STD info and blood type etc (I remember these things so I don't have to have too many blood tests!!!). So I started asking lots of questions like what will the bloodtest tell you and what will you do about it and what are the chances of this and that - and she got all flustered! So in the end I said I'd think about it.

Called my midwife straight away when I got home and she said that there is a very rare condition where your platelettes are low but it is not a really big deal at this stage in the pregnancy, can't harm the baby and they don't do anything about it until closer to the birth...so I am not having the test at this stage...oh yeah she said 2 spots in the mouth was pretty poor likelihood too, because you'd expect these spots all over if you had this condition...

I have to see the Ob next week, and he may request a full blood screening as hospital policy, so if he does then i'll get this checked too, and only get jabbed once instead of twice. If he doesn't request bloods then I'll have to decide whether to get checked...but I'll leave that til later!

Anyway the good thing was that she checked bub's heartbeat while I was there which is the first time I have heard it (bub was hiding last check-up at 13wks). And my mum got to hear it too which was very exciting for her...

Haven't felt any flutters yet, but am expecting them any time now and looking forward to really *feeling* bubba in there...mum was very disappointed that my bump isn't bigger, but after getting on her scales I have decided that that is probably because I have actually lost weight...the bump is in there I am sure but so far its still hidden by my jelly-belly!!! LOL!!!

The best thing about coming home (besides seeing my family, obviously) is that my mum has gone absolutely baby-crazy and I literally have 1 huge bag and an even huger box of baby stuff to take home with me...we'll be paying excess baggage at the airport!!! LOL. Plus, my mum is a bit bigger than me, but has recently lost weight so I have picked up a heap of her "too big" clothes that will fit me perfectly when I have a big belly! Yay!

Anyway that is enough of a raving introduction from me for now. I hope that all is well with everyone else, and I will catch you soon.


Tam - 28
Si - 28
1 Stepson - 5
EDD - 2/8/05

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#32 Lisa_S

Posted 16 February 2005 - 01:31 PM

omg larissa!!!!!!! thats great news, i'm so pleased for you!!! I know how long you've been trying for!

About the "Aren't you brave?" comments regarding hb, they really irritate me!!! I think its the other way around actually, I think anyone who gives birth in hospital is BRAVE!!! I can't imagine labouring comfortably or progressively in a hospital environment nor having to deal with the drs/nurses "need to 'do something' ",!

"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
Begin it now!" -Goethe

#33 ailterra

Posted 17 February 2005 - 10:50 AM

Hi all,
Congratulations Larissa, I had Robyn Dempsy for the 2 of my homebirths, I found her to be fantastic and can highly recomend her.She usually works with a partner I had Myra as my second midwife who was also great. You find that you build up a great rapour with this women during your journey through pregnancy. The other advantage with Robyns practice is that they have informal get-togethers where you can meet other homebirth women which, especially on the North Shore is very important as so many women choose elective ceasers.( Mind you thats their choice)
If you have any questions at all or want any more information dont hesitate to PM me.Good luck, oh! and I would book in soon there just arnt enough homebirth midwifes around, you can always cancel if you decide to go with someone else.

Michelle congratulations on the birth of Max, hope all is going well.

Tam Sheebe and Lisa S congratulations to you all as well.

Well my little homebirth baby just started walking and its his first birthday at the end of the month, where does time go? it all happens so fast!

Hope everyone is well,

#34 Shebee

Posted 20 February 2005 - 02:29 PM

Hello, I hope everyone is having a fabulous weekend!

Tam - Congratulations on your pregnancy and I look forward to keeping up with you over the coming months!

Well girls, I did warn you that I'd have questions for you experienced homebirthers and here they come, LOL!

Any literature I've read has said that children really need their own support person and it should be someone that they know and trust well. My family have known for the past year that I would have a homebirth next time around and I had sussed out my older sister as the support person for DS. She hasnt stopped talking about it, and telling people, since. Even though I wasnt even pregnant.
Anyhow, we broke the news to my family yesterday (even though its early days yet) and everyone is really happy, especially my older sister. She is really excited about being support person and is planning it already!
But, I'm already feeling anxious about my decision as a few things have come to my attention. AGES ago we were talking about it and I was saying that when the time comes she'll have to have plans in place for what she is going to do with her own son (who is eight), because I could be needing her anytime day or night. At that point I just casually mentioned "although it could be a good experience for a boy". Now today she was going on about all the things she would do to make sure "he" is prepared for it. I thought "he" meant my DS but she means hers! She has assumed that he is invited. You wouldnt think it would be such a big deal to correct her misunderstanding but she is very sensitive about her son and him not being "included" in things.
But the bigger thing, which I am thinking might be a real hurdle, is that anytime the homebirth is mentioned, the very first thing that comes out of her mouth is "We'll need to know the warning signs to get you to hospital". This has warning signs going off in my head! I think intellectually she thinks that a woman has the right and the ability to birth at home, but I dont think that she actually believes it at her core and this worries me.
Her only birth was at the royal north shore in Sydney. She was induced, blah,blah, blah and ended up having an emergency caesarian. This is her only birth experience. She doesnt have any "normal" birth experince at all. All her friends have had elective c/s. I'm wondering if it is too much for me to expect her to "get" what homebirth is about and to be truly open about it? She says that she is, but everything that comes out of her mouth says that she isnt. She is so focussed on what can go wrong and thinking that she has to be aware of that and recognise that, even though I've tried to assure her that that is what the midwives are there for and is not a part of her role at all.
I'm worried that her subconscious fears and mistrust in the natural process will affect me. I feel as though (at this point) my greatest task in all of this is preparing her for the homebirth! I just dont feel that she will actually be able to "support" us with her current perspective.

Sorry I'm going on for so long, but I am wondering if you have any advice or experience with this? Did you have a support person for your kid/s? What was great about them? What would you do differently? Did you have to really prepare them? Do your support people have any advice they'd like to pass on to me or my sister? Any advice or suggestions are greatly appreciated.

LOL, I suspect this may be an ongoing issue for me!

Thanks for listening!

Me 29
dh 32
DS   Sebastian 16th Feb 2002
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#35 ruthieroo

Posted 22 February 2005 - 12:51 AM

Hurrah for homebirthers! I just now found this section here at EB.original.gif

I'm up way too late so this won't be long but just wanted to pop in and say hello.

My name is Ruth and I'm very happily married to my husband, Jonno. We're expecting our first baby due April 25th and we're planning a homebirth. At the beginning of my pregnancy I really didn't think I'd be able to have one--I didn't want to do it if my husband was really uncomfortable with it and I thought he would be. But he came around very nicely and supports it entirely. Once we decided, "Ok, let's plan to do it this way..." it was such a huge weight off me! My pregnancy has been basically a breeze since: I feel so happy, confident and peaceful about it all.

Anyway, it's good to find you ladies.original.gif I'm from the U.S. originally so everyone I know in real life who has had a home birth is overseas so it's nice to "meet" some more local hb'ers.biggrin.gif

Our "surprise" is due April 25th!

#36 ailterra

Posted 22 February 2005 - 11:44 AM

Hi All,
Congratulations and welcome to Ruth, hope all goes well over the next couple of months.
Sheebee we were advised to have a support person for our children at both of our home births but in the end we didnt, we have no family over here and it was to personal to share with a friend. We did however have a backup friend who would come over if, in the unlikely event we needed to be transfered to hospital at all.Our children were all really well prepared for the birth and were very involved in the pregnancy and antenatal visits, they got to take each others blood pressure and find the babies heart beat and their own with the doppler. Books helped alot, our midwives had a great selection of childrens books about homebirth and also a few short videos on water births.
I was just wondering if you go to a support group perhaps you could take your sister along and she would get more of an idea about homebirth and the wonderful positive support you get from the midwives.
Good luck with your decisions,

#37 Chrisom

Posted 01 March 2005 - 10:28 PM

Hey all,

Max is doing well - 1 month old today.  I'm sitting here awake when he's sleeping.   I've been expecting him to wake up for the last 2 hours or more!!  I keep thinking I should go to bed, but I'm sure he'll wake up soon...  Ah well original.gif  Nice that he's sleeping longer!

Sheebee - in terms of children at the birth...   For my first homebirth, Aidan was just under 15 months and wasn't that interested, but did need caring for: nappy changes, food etc.  It meant that my husband could be involved in the birth rather than playing with Aidan etc..   For the second birth, Aidan and Eve were much more involved - in the birth pool etc.  At the end, they were watching a DVD, in the same room as the birth pool.  We had planned a support person, but it turned out to not be necessary.  The difference this time round was that both Aidan and Eve were able to comprehend what would be happening.

I used a great book called Hello Baby! to prepare them for the homebirth.  It's a kids picture book that is about homebirthing.  I also had a couple of waterbirth books, that showed babies being born (actual photos).  We also used photo's taken of when they were babies...

I would recommend having a support person available because they can make sure your children are cared for, and in case you do need to go to hospital, or there is something like post-partum haemmorage (sp?), then the children can be removed from the trauma ..

Oh look, Max is finally stirring!!

LAst words quickly:  your birth, your way.  Lay down the law, nicely or sternly to anyone that will be at the birth.  If you think someone is completely missing the point, ensure that they fully understand what you expect, and what you DO NOT want them to do.  I would explain it as that you do not need medical assistance as that is what your midwives are for, and that you would like her to concentrate on how to look after the children.  Maybe get her involved in the preparation of the children??  But if I had a support person lined up that was giving me worries, I'd either make sure it was sorted, or cut them out.  

It's a pity she feels that way about her son, but I'd also point out that he would be welcome when the REST of the family comes round..

Good luck with that...


#38 Shebee

Posted 04 March 2005 - 02:01 PM

Yay, I havent been able to reply to threads for a while, so finally I am back in!

Terri and Michelle, thank you so much for your replies and support. The issues with my sister unfortunately go much deeper than I've explained. I had originally thought that having her at the birth might be really healing for us both, for our relationship but that doesnt seem to be the case.
After my conversation with my sister about needing her to come by herself so that she can just focus on supporting my son, I got a phone call from another one of my sisters. She wanted to warn me that my sister "had lost the plot" after our call and was ranting and raving and calling me everything under the sun and who did I think I was making these demands, blah, blah, blah.
As much as I hate to admit it, supporting me just isnt one of my sisters priorities. She had her own agenda for wanting to be at the birth and loving and supporting me wasnt it.
I have now realised that if this birth is to go well at home, that my sister will not be a part of it. I dont trust her. It hurts to say that but its true.

My Mum died when I was pregnant with Sebastian. I've had to do a lot of healing around that before I could even consider having another child. I thought that sharing this experience with my older sister might be healing for us both, something amazing that we could always share. But its just not meant to be. I just cant make our relationship something that it is not.

I found the lack of family support really hard after Sebastian was born and things arent going to be any different this time so I need to do something about it now, so that I dont fall into the big black PND hole that I did last time.

I dont know anyone IRL that has had a homebirth. I'm not aware of a homebirth support group in this area. I do recall that my midewife had said that there were two women out this way that she had attended so I'll ask her if they are happy to be contacted. Perhaps I will discover a thriving little HB community under my very nose!
Wow, it would be so nice to have someone to chat to it about in person, not that you gals arent fabulous though!!!

Though it is different this time around, I still cant help feeling that I just want my Mum!

Thank you so much for listening.

Me 29
dh 32
DS   Sebastian 16th Feb 2002

This message was edited by Shebee on Friday, 4 March 2005 @ 3:06 PM

#39 Guest_~Franny~_*

Posted 04 March 2005 - 09:38 PM

I'm a regular lurker in this thread, although there will be no more babies for me in this life wink.gif.

Just posting some exciting news I read in the paper the other day for women who want to birth at home in NSW. According to this article in the Sydney Morning Herald, from May, women in the St George area will have access to publicly funded home births. If that goes well, the program will be extended to work out of Sutherland Hospital and RHW Randwick!!


And a BIG congratulations to Lisa_S on your pregnancy. You might remember we were pregnant, due around the same time when you had your Kyra? original.gif You wanted to use my birth photos on your site?? Back then I couldn't do it, well if you're still interested, I'm more open to the idea now wink.gif . PM me if you want original.gif .

#40 Shebee

Posted 10 March 2005 - 12:59 PM

Hi Franny, welcome!
Just thought I'd pop in and say, Yay for public funded homebirths! That is fabulous news, if it all goes ahead. It's nowhere near me but its a start and it can only be a good thing for us all!  original.gif

Me 29
dh 32
DS   Sebastian 16th Feb 2002
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#41 chookas!

Posted 13 March 2005 - 08:22 AM

Just thought I should pop in and let you know that unfortunately we lost our baby, it turned out to be a blighted ovum at our 7 week ultrasound. We are heartbroken but at least we know that we can actually get pregnant now. Back to the rollercoaster....

Best of luck to you all, I'll be back!

Larissa 29, DH 34
TTC #1 since August 02,
1st IUI July, unsuccessful
1st IVF September, BFN
FET #1 M/C dammit!!!

#42 Shebee

Posted 14 March 2005 - 02:10 PM

Larissa, I'm so sorry.

hugs, best wishes and babydust coming your way!

#43 rachelP

Posted 16 March 2005 - 01:59 PM

Larissa I'm so sorry to hear that. sad.gif
Hang in there.

Shebee... PM me will you! I live in Vic too, wondering where you are???

How is the support stuff coming along?

Congrats to those expecting new bubs at home.
My two little homebirthed bundles are getting all grown up. Ivy is 9.5 months and almost walking! ah! And April is rapidly approaching three - scary. still feeding both of them. original.gif

#44 Macmummy

Posted 16 March 2005 - 11:11 PM

oh Larrisa,I'm so sorry for your loss.

Sending big hugs your way!!!

*Baby Due mid May 2005*
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#45 ailterra

Posted 12 April 2005 - 12:23 PM

Hi All,
I was just wondering how everyone was? its been a while, we must have some more homebirths due soon in the group.
Hope everyone had a good Easter and the children have settled back to school OK. We had a great time camping interesting, with an adventurous 1 year old but great having the older ones to help.
Has anyone any tips for keeping a little one nearby? I refuse to resort to those wrist straps and harnesses but he knows no bounderys.
Well take care everyone I do hope you are all well,

#46 SusanFarr

Posted 15 April 2005 - 10:04 PM

Hi All,

Ruthieroo - the 25th of April is coming up fast.  I'm due about that time and also planning a homebirth.

So Ailterra there's at least 2 of us!

BOL for the coming days/weeks Ruth.


TTC#1 Feb 2001
Me 34 endo,fibroids,fsh? DH 41, DDog 2
3 IUI, 2 IVF - BFN's
Surprise! EDD 26/4/05

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#47 Shebee

Posted 14 May 2005 - 03:58 PM

Hello, wow, isnt it quiet in here?

Ruth and Susan, where are you? How are you? How did it all go? I hope all is well and everything has gone to plan, well as much as it can with bringing babies into the world!

Well, I'm now at the half-way point and really starting to settle into this pregnancy. It has taken me a while, I've had quite a few issues to work through but I am getting there and it feels good!

My midwives are all organised. I'm meeting with both my lead and second midwife and they have found someone to act as a 3rd/on call backup midwife if needed. At the moment these are the only women doing HB's in this area. Fortunately I feel comfortable and confident with them both.

I am also doing all of the regular anti-natal appointments with the midwives clinic at the local public hospital. My HB midwives (both of whom work at this hospital) have advised me not to disclose that I am planning a HB until my 36 week appointment. Though the hospital are aware that they do them there is still some controversy surrounding it and they are working on how to approach it and really bring it into the open. I have offered to speak with the hospital regarding me decision and how I obtained their services etc, which I think I will end up needing to do at some stage.
My midwives have assured me though that any issues are with hospital management/admin and not with staff on the labour/maternity ward. Apparently staff have been very supportive if transfers have needed to take place.

We still havent organised someone as a support for DS during the labour/birth. We will definately have someone organised by 35 weeks but I am considering just seeing how things progress and if it looks as though this time will be quite fast, as it was with DS, we really mightn't need someone else there. I preferred to be left to my own devices last time and am expecting it to be the same this time, but maybe not.

So, all you experienced homebirth Mums out there was there anything that you found surprising with birthing at home? Was there anything, with hindsight that you did/didnt do, that you would have or did do differently second time around?

Any advice, tips or inspiration you care to lend is greatly appreciated.

I really am excited about this! The thought of curling up in my OWN bed with my new bub and family after the birth just brings such relief and joy to me. My own bed, my own food, my own toilet, MY PEOPLE!!!! Oh, it is just so amazing.

I feel so honoured to be joining your ranks!

Rachel, sorry I havent pm'd you in ages, hope all is well and your girls are thriving.


Me 29
dh 32
DS   Sebastian 16th Feb 2002
<a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/">
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#48 Kaohmie

Posted 16 May 2005 - 10:10 PM

Hello all,

I am so happy to have found this thread (I had to post elsewhere and be directed here blush.gif)  Can I blame the pregnancy hormones?? original.gif  

I have come to the decision today that I want to birth at home.  This is something that I have longed for - and I feel that I really need to do this time.  I have also realised that I have a very good chance of doing it too.  This will be my fourth babe - my first was an emergency c/s, the other two were completely natural - unassisted, smooth (fast!), deliveries.  

I have made a few phone calls to get the name of some midwives in my area and will make the calls tomorrow.  

As I am a novice at this - any and all advice/support/help is deeply appreciated.  

I am so glad that I found you all!!  original.gif

DH Ian
DD Jocelyn (6)
DS Gordon (4)
DD Bronwyn (20mths)
EDD 5/12/05

#49 Kaohmie

Posted 19 May 2005 - 01:07 PM

Just a quick update.  I met with a midwife yesterday and I really like her.  She is also able to take me on (as December isn't a fabulous month wink.gif) which was fabulous.  My DH, apart from the initial "where are we going to get the money from?" is very supportive and I think a little excited too.  

I am a lot excited original.gif  And can't seem to stop smiling - this feels so right.  

Thanks for listening.


Mum of three and a half wink.gif

#50 Shebee

Posted 20 May 2005 - 03:31 PM

Kaohmie, congratulations!

It is just so exciting deciding to birth at home and then have it start to come together, with meeting the midwife etc. None of meetings have been less than two hours so far, as I am so excited and have so many questions. I've now met my 2nd midwife as well and really like the energy between both of them and the way that they interact.

How far are you into the pregnancy? Which state/city are you in?

It will be good to get your thoughts and feelings and things progress.

I look forward to hearing more from you  original.gif.

Me 29
dh 32
DS   Sebastian 16th Feb 2002
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