Homebirth Mums and Mums to Be #6
Homebirth Mums and Mums to Be #6
, Oct 27 2005 08:46 AM
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52 replies to this topic
Posted 03 December 2005 - 11:07 PM
I was wanting to speak with any mums who planned a homebirth that ended with an emergency cesar. My son is over 6 months old now and I am still having lots of trouble recovering emotionally from his birth. So many people I hear of had cesars at least in part due to unnecessary intervention, etc from hospitals. I don't know of anyone who planned a homebirth (like me) that ended this way.
Thanks in antisipation,
Posted 06 December 2005 - 05:40 AM
Just thought that I would pop in and say that I am still waiting . . . waiting . . . . waiting! LOL
I can give this end of the pregnancy away
Everything is going fine though - so I shouldn't complain at all - I'm just feeling very heavy at the moment - and am hoping that everything will go fine.
Susan I'm sorry - I can't help you - I had a c/s due to a cascade of medical intervention with my first child - but have gone on to have 2 (and now hopefully 3) successful VBAC's. I hope that you are able to find someone to chat with. Talking it through helps heaps.
Tania We lobbied at the old site - and I thought that we were going to get a homebirth forum . . . *sigh* I think that we may have a chance though - this is the response that I got from a querry about establishing a forum dedicated to homebirth . . . (if I can figure out how to do this that is! LOL) The response is from the forums administrator - so as you can see there is still hope!
Thank you for your PM.
I agree that homebirthing is becoming more popular and more recognised as a birth option, and I agree that the Home Birthing mothers need a place where they can support one another.
We are planning a site upgrade over the next few months, and a homebirthing forum is one that I am planning in adding when all that is up and running.
At the moment we are not starting any new forums as it would require setting up a new moderator etc, and with the new forums not far away, we thought it would be better to wait, but don't worry - it is coming!
Please let me know if I can help any further.
~Kylie~ Congrats on reaching the 6 week mark - every milestone counts Are you getting any morning sickness at all yet? Or shouldn't I even think it for you?
Magenta How are you doing? How is the count down till maternity leave going? I hope that bubs isn't keeping you up at night too much with all of his/her movement!
Ok - I had better get on and do the breakfast thing now - have a good day.
Posted 06 December 2005 - 12:01 PM
get in the bedroom and get amorous!!
I really really feel for you.already its so hard for me to get out of bed!
Ive had to push my mat leave forward by two weeks-meaning im on leave as of 16dec!!! yeah!
Baby still kicking.
susan-sorry. im lucky enuff never to hv had a ceaser.good luck tho!
will you hv your older child at yr HB?
Im planning on hving my DS(4yrs) at our HB.But my sister will look after him in case he gets scared or bored!!
Ihave been having the STRONGEST BH contractions everfor about 2 mnths now!!!!
hopefully this is a very good thing!
Posted 06 December 2005 - 04:26 PM
I've never had a cesarean birth, but a couple of women I have been midwife to have...and have planned to birth at home. There is no quick fix for feeling ok about your birth, it's something you need to give yourself permission to feel disappointed and upset about before you can move onto more constructive ways of processing it. The CARES group have a great support service, look up their website and access their wonderful members who have all had a cesarean birth and have gone on to help other women make sense of their experiences. Birthrites also have a great website along the same lines.
The women I've birthed with, have all had to come to a point where they acknowledge that they ended up with the best birth possible, rather than the birth they had anticipated. Sometimes this is a hard one to accept, particularly if you feel that there was unwarranted interference or intervention, and that the outcome could have been different in different circumstances. But most of the time, caring understanding support from those who know what you aspired to, and can listen without pulling out the old "but you have a healthy baby, what are you complaining about" is what gets women through. And an accpetance that even with the best laid plans, birth is unpredictable, and some babies just have a different journey to take...
Hope this helps, feel free to pm me anytime
Posted 07 December 2005 - 03:14 PM
7 weeks and morning sickness (is that all day sickness?) has hit! I've been feeling so horirble! It last until about 20 weeks with my last 2 pregnancies, so hoping it's not so long this time!
Posted 08 December 2005 - 06:02 PM
I'm back - its been quite some time since I've checked in, but life with DD 4yold & DS 2yold has overtaken me big time. Most of my days are spent dragging DS down from anything high. He loves climbing.
Congrats Sheebee and Hello Sunnybunny great to see you both here still keeping up the support for homebirthers. Great to hear the news of your pregnancy Kylie!
We are now thinking of number 3 and 4 homebirths. Looking to have a major move away from our home where DS & DD were born, but move on to a new home with more land and create 3 & 4 there to help us feel grounded.
I must say looking back I have thoroughly enjoyed my homebirths they have been the most empowering experiences. My husband also agrees, he sees it as the most normal experience especially after the birth of his first child in a hospital setting.
I am amazed at the shift toward homebirth in the past couple of years, so many women are no longer content to "go with the flow" and are really consciously choosing how they will birth their babes.
Great to make contact with you all again and hopefully I will be able to post on a regular basis.
Love and Light
Posted 09 December 2005 - 12:07 AM
Hey all - I'm still here and in one piece and startin to get a little down about it actually - but I know that this baby will come out when it wants to - I just have to be patient. Easier said than done!
Kylie - all day sickness - not a lot of fun - see if you can get some rest if you can.
Magenta - Hang in there - your time will be coming sooner than you think!
Hi Sallybelly - I'm envious of your move to a bigger block - it would be wonderful.
Ok - Now I am tired enough to sleep - I hope
Take care all,
Posted 11 December 2005 - 01:57 PM
Hello, I hope everyone is well!
Kaohmie, I hope your little one is now with you! Jazz arrived 8 days after her EDD so I know about the waiting! Cant wait to hear how you are doing.
Sally, great to hear from you again. OMG I cant believe that your bubs are that old already! As for moving homes I can understand the need to ground and really settle and make your mark on a place. My Mum and her partners ashes are here, we were married here, we have both placentas here burried with trees on top and have now had our first homebirth here. I dont think I'll ever be able to move! Mind you, we are on 20 acres so wont be needing more space
! (Did you notice how I typed "first homebirth", and we were only planning on having two babes
Magenta, sorry for not having posted a birth story yet. The truth is that it just hasnt happened yet. It took me a while to do Sebastians fully too. I think I just have to sit with the experience and let it be a while, before I can get it down on paper. I cant just "write" it, I really re-live the experience when I do it and have to include EVERY detail! The story ends up taking longer to write (and read) than the labour itself LOL!
This has been such a healing experience for me. BUT, it wasnt birthing at home that did the healing. I found that I had to do the healing BEFORE the birth could take place (I feel this was one of the reasons that Jazz was "late". I had some last minute issues to deal with!) . My midwives have said that this does seem to be the case and that labours that become "stuck" or pregnancies that go too far over appear to be a result of unresolved issues. For me it meant I had to be flexible about the process, whether that meant ending up birthing at home OR in hospital. I had to get to a place where I KNEW, no matter how or where it happened, that my baby and I were safe and that we'd be OK.
It was hard though, being open and ok with the possibilities but stiil holding the vision of birthing at home and having such a strong desire to do so.
What I know for sure though, is that birthing at home is not just about choosing a "place" to have a baby. There is so much more to it than that
Wow, homebirth - what a wonderful thing to do!
And Kylie, congratulations!
Posted 12 December 2005 - 04:36 PM
*excuse me butting in here*
Susan, could you please enable your PMs so I can PM you re the caesarean stuff.
All the best to the rest of you beautiful homebirthers.
I'll be back here in a few years.
Posted 12 December 2005 - 07:53 PM
Just a quickie to let you know that we welcomed Rhowyn Cae into our family yesterday afternoon at 12.38pm. She was a healthy 7 pound 12 oz and is just perfect.
I will try to do a full birth story in the next few weeks if I can - but I had to share a funny thing that happened - we had a good established labour at 3am and so we called our midwife (as my previous 2 had been very quick labours) and as soon as she came things started to slow down - and then would reestablish - and we would call one of our birth attendants (as the kids slowly started to wake up) and then they would arrive and labour would slow down again (well - you have to meet and greet people ). Anyhow - we decide that we need to have the kids go to the park and make the house quiet for a little while so that labour can get back on track - they leave and sure enough labour starts to sharpen up again only to halted dead in its tracks by the door man coming and fitting the front door for an hour!
My midiwife waited 1/2 hour after the door man had left to see if labour was going to push along at a great pace - but at that stage it seemed to be well and truelly stalled. So she left and made us promise to ring at the slightest hint that things were well and truelly on their way - and she fully expected to be back later on that night in the cool of the evening when things were a lot quieter.
Well - labour established itself again after a little while and pretty soon my waters broke and I was suddenly in 2nd stage labour . . . we did call our midwife and the carers with the kids to get them back in time. The kids just made it (and boy - holding back those pushes just so that they would be there was . . . um . . . interesting!!) - but our midwife didn't make it in time and my DH did the most spectacular job of coaching and supporting me and of course catching our precious little bundle. He even caught the placenta which followed about 5 minutes after birth - and just before our midwife raced in We were all doing fine - and my DH has hardly taken the grin off his face - I am so proud of him!
Anyhow - my new little bundle is stiring - and I should really be getting some sleep. I didn't mean to rabbit on like that - sorry!
Posted 13 December 2005 - 01:34 PM
OOOOHHHHH my god!!!!!!!
well done to yr husband!!
It so ironic isnt it!!
You really did a fantastic job! Enjoy your babymoon time with gorgeous little one. I cant believe the strength of yr husband!im sure my DH would pass out!!
WOW well done you.
Posted 13 December 2005 - 02:59 PM
Kaohmie, BIG CONGRATULATIONS
to you and the family on the arrival of Rhowyn Cae! And well done to DH!
What a great name! Do you mind sharing your other kids names?
Again, well done, congratulations and so pleased to hear that everyone is well!
Yay, another homebirth bub!
Posted 16 December 2005 - 10:29 AM
such lovley news around xmas time!!!
Im on my last work day today!
so i wont be around as much!
anyway-all the best-ill try to pop in to see how yr all going and wll let you know how our HB goes!!
Posted 16 December 2005 - 10:59 AM
Hello. I am pregnant with my 3rd child at the moment. My second child was born at home - it was the most wonderful birth. (My 1st was meant to be born at a birth centre, ended up transferred to labour ward.)
I have already hooked up with my team of carers from last birth ... but having looked at my budget for next year I see that I cannot afford the cost of a home birth. Especialy when I know that a birth centre would be *free*.
I feel like I need to convince myself that it is worth the money to be at home (and then I have to find the money somehow!). I'd love your thoughts.
Posted 19 December 2005 - 06:10 PM
Congratulations Kaohmie!!!!! What wonderful news! Glad to hear your birth went well
Welcome Cheryl! I also wouldn't be able to afford homebirth, but I have private health insurance and they will cover up to 2k of the birth.. leaving me out of pocket about $200. I was with another fund, but transferred to this one and got to keep my already served waiting periods.
Posted 24 December 2005 - 04:47 PM
I suppose I might be a bit biased, as I work as a homebirth midwife, but I'm also a woman who has birthed twice at home, and I've worked in the 'system' too, so I do know first hand what it is like to be a midwife, and the restrictions that are placed on you, and the women you care for, even in a birthing centre environment.
I know money is important, we all need it to survive. But there is also the baby bonus or whatever that centrelink payment is called now (can't get my brain to work today - must be all the pre-Chrismas drinks
) Many families that we birth with see this as an extra payment, that they otherwise wouldn't have, and so they use it to pay their midwives. There is some left over, for clothes or other things you might need, but that's what they tend to do. WE are also very flexible and go with whatever payments suit the woman and her family.
Hope this helps, I just see that there is nowhere you can give birth, other than at home, where you are absolutely the mistress of your own destiny, and where you can truly own the experience. There's that, and also sleeping afterwards in your own bed!
Posted 07 January 2006 - 12:42 PM
Hi Nic and welcome! I hope you go into labour very soon and you get the birth you're after
Posted 16 January 2006 - 11:15 AM
Was directed to this thread by Kylie, after I posted wanting answers on home water births. I'm 10 w pg with bub#1, and considering a home water birth... but currently booked into the RWH family birthing centre here in Melb. For us it's also a financial thing... can we afford it? We don't have private health cover, so the entire expense would be out of pocket.Nic
- hope you've had your bub and all is well! Can't wait to hear the birth story!LovelyMum
- I'm also nervous about getting those responses, but in my heart I know that for me and baby it would be best... Very nervous to hear what my grandmother is going to think. (She'll probably come over from Canada for the birth.) Even after your first homebirth was successful, people still doubt your decision??? That's shocking!Kylie
- Thanks for the invite!
You must be in the due in July group? Are you the Kylie that was in my ttc group??? We had two of them at one point.
Looking forward to "meeting" you all!
Posted 16 January 2006 - 08:06 PM
Congrats to all the recent births, and congrats to those still waiting for choosing home birth - you will have a wonderful experience.
My son was born at home in feb 05, and our second baby is due in early July. The lovely midwives that helped us at our son's birth are not avaliable for us this time. One has health problems and the other will be overseas.
I'm in Melbourne Bayside/East if anyone can recommend a private midwife that covers this area could you please PM me.
Also Kylie I noticed you post that your health fund give you back 2K - mine only covers about $650 (which given that is costs me $800 a year its not really worth it) - can you tell me which fund you are in.
Posted 16 January 2006 - 08:10 PM
have a list of midwives in Vic...and here are a few with contact details...
Nicola Dutton - Bayswater North, Victoria
Tel: (03) 9720 6956
Mob: 0409 803 285
Robyn Thompson - 0418 324 058
Based in Altona - Servicing wide area http://www.melbmidwifery.com.au/introd.htm
Lina Clerke - childbirth educator and midwife http://www.wonderfulbirth.com
Home: (03) 9704 2386
Mobile: 0415 196 741
03 9844 2523
Joy Johnston http://www.aitex.com.au/joy/about.htm
phone: 03 9808 9614
mobile: 04 111 90448
Brenda Manning - Mornington Peninsula. http://www.themidwife.com.au
0409 194 623
(03) 5986 2535
Posted 18 January 2006 - 09:27 AM
A huge congratulations to you ~Nic~ on the home birth of your beautiful huge baby girl.
Like most home births it sounds like you had a wonderful labour and birth.
Posted 20 January 2006 - 10:45 PM
I have just got my much wanted BFP and we're hoping and wishing for a healthy pregnancy and a gorgeous, healthy and happy baby as a result!
I'm just exploring options at the moment. Even before my m/c I was very nervous about the thought of having my baby in a hospital, there is no birthing centre close to us. Gold Coast Hospital was supposed to have one up and running by June last year, according to an election promise, but it hasn't happened.
So, I'm thinking of a home birth. DH is not totally (actually, even slightly) convinced about it but I need to get more information before I can convert him.
I have so many questions... do you all mind if I jump in and ask them?
I know costs vary, can you give me an idea of what you paid and what this included? We don't have private health cover.
Any recommendations for the Gold Coast area?
What about location - we're in a rented townhouse and neighbours are reasonably close and one set can look straight in to our yard. This makes me a little uneasy. I wish we had our own place but this won't happen before our due date.
Have any of you had a partner that you needed to convert to home birthing? How did it go and what did they think of the experience?
I know I'll have lots more questions... but it would be lovely just to hear your stories and info.
Posted 23 January 2006 - 04:01 PM
Dinnae - Welcome! I don't post in a "Due in" group, they're too big and scary for me.
I post here and I also post in my July group from when I had my second DD in 2003. I didn't post in a TTC group either.
JicyJac - My health fund is HBA. They don't advertise that they do HB on their website and not all phone sales people know about it. You need to ask for Jenny Doherty as she is the one that handles it all. Also Australian Unity will cover up to $2600, but you need to have been with them for minimum 12 months. HTH!
~Nic~ Congratulations on your wonderful birth! I loved reading your story.
Lime - Hi there and congratulations! My DH needed convincing as my first 2 births were at a private hospital. It helped to find out what it was that he wasn't happy with. (Ended up being that the thought he might have to "do" too much!
) I ended up talking to him about how when I had a natural birth in a private hospital I had to fight for the whole 9 months to convince my OB, etc, that it was "normal" and that if I had've had a midwife that wasn't into natural birth she could have made it hard for me. I also told him that I'd like to deliver in the water and private hospitals don't let you do that. (Generally) I then went and booked into see a midwife and talk to her and he came around after that! Good luck.
All is well here, morning sickness slowly starting to ease, but I'm not coping well with the heat!
Posted 23 January 2006 - 09:29 PM
Thank you for your reply. I think I will do as you said and book in with a couple of midwives so DH can talk to them and become more comnfortable.
I know his last experience of a hospital (when I had my m/c) was very traumatic for him also, so he does understand where I am coming from. He is terrified about what will happen if something goes wrong. At the moment, we are about 10 minutes drive from the hopital so I keep trying to sell that to him. I would also like to deliver in water and DH is actually very keen on that too, so maybe it will be easier than I thought?
If it's OK, I stick around and learn from you all!
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