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Do I have to send my DD to 4yo Kinder? (vic)


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#26 Heather11

Posted 30 December 2014 - 10:59 PM

OP, did you send your older child to preschool?  Was it of benefit to her?

Is not attending for your benefit or hers?  Oh and I get how inconvenient the times can be. I had to pick up one school child who finished early go do the preschool pick up and then go back to the school to pick up the older child.  It was a major pain in the bum but I didn't even think about denying my preschool child the opportunity to go to preschool even though it would have made my life so much easier.

#27 la di dah

Posted 30 December 2014 - 11:13 PM

Wise and all-knowing Wikipedia says the first mandatory year is age 6.

I don't really believe in school for 4 year olds, personally. A short dance/activity class a couple times a week, yeah. Socialization, manners, sharing, sure. But I don't think structured schooling is particularly beneficial in that age range and I'd worry about the gains in lining up and listening coming at the cost of health issues. We do plenty of socializing kids (especially girls) to sit still and do their work quietly. Can wait until 6 or 7 I think.

But flip side I also wouldn't link "not in pre-school" to "with the parents all the time." I do think there's benefits to being cared for by others or doing things in a group away from Mum/Dad.

#28 DebbieDoesSanta

Posted 30 December 2014 - 11:26 PM

You have the opportunity to have your child out of your hands for a few hours a couple of times a week and you don't see the point?

:rofl:

#29 Heather11

Posted 30 December 2014 - 11:30 PM

View PostMavis Baker, on 30 December 2014 - 11:26 PM, said:

You have the opportunity to have your child out of your hands for a few hours a couple of times a week and you don't see the point?

:rofl:

There was also that too.  I could go home and have a coffee in peace.

#30 Baggy

Posted 31 December 2014 - 07:41 AM

My 6yo went to 4yo kinder, and it was a huge benefit for her because she's such a shy and anxious child. So it helped her with the transistion to school.

However, with my younger DD, she's very confident and full of beans and I can see her settling into school quite eaisly without kinder I guess.

She starts art/craft classes next year. She also has regular play dates with two other children who will start prep at the same time as her. One of those friends, she spends time with for a few hours without me. She was also going to start swimming lessons too. I was going to have structured days with her at home during the day.

IDK. I thought she could do without kinder and I could spend some extra time with her one on one (ofcourse, she wouldn't be with me all day everyday), but the more I think about it, maybe it is more about me than her.

I think I'll ring up once they are open again, and see if they have spaces anywhere. I'd probably prefer to compromise and send her half way through the year (if that's possible), but I'll ring up and see what my options are, and take it from there.

Thankyou everyone for taking the time to reply.

#31 Baggy

Posted 31 December 2014 - 07:51 AM

View PostFyn Angelot, on 30 December 2014 - 11:46 AM, said:

I started a similar thread a while back and got flamed for even thinking of keeping DD home.

I can see benefits and drawbacks either way.  If you do keep her home, I'd think it'd be helpful to be quite intentional and strategic about how you structure that year for her.  

But I don't see it as inherently wrong or causing disadvantage.  Good luck!

What did you decide on in the end? If you don't mind answering, that is.

#32 tenar

Posted 31 December 2014 - 08:06 AM

I have been blown away by the quality of the 4yo program at our local kinder.  DD1 did 4yo kindy last year and had access to so many things that we could not have managed to do at home (and we do all the usual things at home and out in the community).

There is no way I would want to deprive my child of that experience.  That said, it's a good kinder, and maybe my decision would be different if the local kindy was not much good.

#33 JinksNewton

Posted 31 December 2014 - 08:11 AM

View PostFyn Angelot, on 30 December 2014 - 11:46 AM, said:

I started a similar thread a while back and got flamed for even thinking of keeping DD home.

Ange, you know I love you, but to be fair the flaming was because of the implication that kindy was nothing more than fingerpainting and that play based learning was valueless. Many people loudly disagreed, and they were right to do so.
That being said, I don't think kindy is an absolute for every child, especially in the circumstances the OP is describing.
My personal view is that it can't hurt to try it, especially if the kindy is feeding into the school your DD is going to

#34 fleeting

Posted 31 December 2014 - 08:45 AM

As others have said it's not compulsory but it does have some benefits. I taught prep for a long time and kids always talk about what they did at their different kinders so that's also something to think about. For me it's the routines like packing bags and sitting on the mat and the social aspect.

I've only taught one child who didn't attend pre school and he had difficulty settling in to school but that could have also just been his personality.

I am a little surprised,  but can understand especially when struggling for parent helpers, that younger siblings have been allowed in the classroom. But really shocked that they've come on excursions.

#35 Jingleflea

Posted 31 December 2014 - 04:19 PM

La di Dah, schooling at 4 isn't the same as schooling at 6 or 7.
They don't sit at desks all day, looking at a blackboard. Or smartboard these days I guess.

The preschool my DD will go to next year(dear lord, this year nearly!!) they play, they do science, they do maths in basic ways(cooking etc). I don't see it as formal schooling as such, and I don't understand the health issues you mentioned in your post. They go outside sand run around plenty.

#36 Etta

Posted 31 December 2014 - 04:29 PM

I think she will cope whatever you decide. And if the choice is made primarily for your needs I am sure it will be a good choice for your DD too. You will have a great time together and she will gain other experiences.

While I found or kinder program an excellent way to get DS school ready, I also saw it as early institutionalising and I am sure he would have been fine without it.

Do what you want. And enjoy it - don't make a choice you will regret.

#37 Tinsilitis

Posted 31 December 2014 - 04:38 PM

I was a kid that didn't do 4 year old kinder. I did 3 yo but we moved interstate over the xmas break and there were no places in any of the local kinders. My mum was a SAHM and I have older siblings that I used to play with, and their friends.

I wouldn't recommend it! I remember the feeling of starting school and not knowing anyone! All the other kids came from kinders together, and I felt very much on the outer. A feeling that I still have 35 years later!

For my own kids, I have found the 4 yo kinder year most beneficial socially. They are very different kids, but each benefited from their first foray into dealing with other kids independently of me in a caring and nurturing environment. School is very different. I am a SAHM but would never consider not sending them myself.

Our kinder does not have structured groups times or routines (I refer to it as the kids are 'free ranged'), with the children having the autonomy to choose their own activities indoors or outdoors each session.

Whilst I don't believe children need timetabling and structure before school, I do think socially they benefit from mixing with the other kids.

#38 Riotproof

Posted 31 December 2014 - 04:41 PM

I really wasn't sure about preschool. In nsw, at least, it is expensive. But, I have seen how much ds has grown in the last year, and quite a lot of that is because of the one day a week at preschool. It's made him more confident in talking to new adults, made him more able to relate feelings, interact with his peers, care for his own belongings, and so much more. I think if I'd been braver and sent him 2 or 3 days this year, he'd actually be ready for school this year.

#39 mommyoffour

Posted 06 January 2015 - 06:33 AM

Personally I sent mine but that was for my sanity. The whole "socialisation" thing is actually hogwash if you ask me. They are children not dogs.

#40 Chookster6

Posted 27 January 2015 - 11:40 AM

I would recommend a child care centre. In SA they all have a qualified teacher in kindy rooms not just diploma / child care qualified. Then you can drop her off and pick up whenever you want. Also in SA you are entitled to some funding for 15 hours for preschool on top of child care benefits. Not sure if it's the same for other states.

#41 Bob-the-skull

Posted 27 January 2015 - 11:51 AM

View Postmommyoffour, on 06 January 2015 - 06:33 AM, said:

Personally I sent mine but that was for my sanity. The whole "socialisation" thing is actually hogwash if you ask me. They are children not dogs.

No they are not dogs. They are small people who have generally never had to navigate larger groups of children. Never had to build friendships out of a one on one situation where most the time mum is friends with the other mum so its a friendship on convenience.

My boys are two very different kids who needed kindy for very different reasons.

DS1 has ASD and severe anxiety. So he has all of the social issues that are common with kids with ASD. Kindy allowed him the time and supported play to learn appropriate ways of friendship and also routines used for education. If he had of gone straight to school he would have had to learn all this whilst also trying to generally learn.

DS2 is high IQ and very social. He needed kindy to keep his mind occupied, I simply couldn't challenge him enough at home. At kindy there was plenty for him to do to push his limits.

Some people really under estimate what kindy is for. It is a stepping stone in to "formal" education.

#42 Green Gummy Bear

Posted 31 January 2015 - 12:58 PM

View PostBaggy, on 31 December 2014 - 07:41 AM, said:



I think I'll ring up once they are open again, and see if they have spaces anywhere. I'd probably prefer to compromise and send her half way through the year (if that's possible), but I'll ring up and see what my options are, and take it from there.



You'll have to go through the council still.  4yo kinder applications down here are just ridiculous!

My eldest didn't go to kinder and she was fine.  My middle child did kinder on a part time basis (she went to 1.5 sessions a week instead of 3).  My youngest will be going, mostly because it's a bucketload cheaper than daycare!

#43 catkin

Posted 13 February 2015 - 07:16 AM

I wonder if doing the acedemic stuff with littlies her own age might be better for her? She would see that everyone at her stage of development has a harder time figuring things out, and she will be expected to actively participate rather than 'sit and behave' in the big kids room?
Also, the one-on-one friendships made at kinder are precious and lead to activities that are hard to get otherwise, like first sleepovers (easier cos you live so near). I'm now friends with 3 mums from 3yo & now 4yo kinder who are coordinating to enter the same school next year. It's a great help to know there are going to be established connections within 200 meters of the school gates when that happens. We are even planning to do a sort of 'pick up plan' where one mum gets all 3 after school sometimes to allow another mum to work or study or pick up an older child. My only other thought is that in the kinder game in Victoria you are lucky to get a spot (even a few hours) even when you enrol and do all the paperwork the year before. Unless someone has dropped out you will be really lucky to find a spot. That said, there are some very interesting private kinders out there where cash will always get you a spot. My DD does sessions at one that has 3&4yo in together, which has helped mine understand school (as her older friends leave). Good luck either way!

#44 Jingleflea

Posted 13 February 2015 - 07:06 PM

So what did you decide? is she in this year?


My 4yr old started preschool 2 weeks ago and is really enjoying it.
They have so much cool stuff, I'm jealous!

#45 Datrys

Posted 13 February 2015 - 07:21 PM

View PostBaggy, on 31 December 2014 - 07:51 AM, said:

What did you decide on in the end? If you don't mind answering, that is.

We intend to enrol her (largely came down to DH's preference, because he will be the primary carer while I work full time.  If it were up to me, I'd still be more reluctant).

That said, given the fact I have no idea where we'll be living next year, we may well struggle to get a place!




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