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Very scared and in pain, has anyone recovered normally from a forceps delivery?

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#1 Ashling

Posted 06 September 2015 - 12:16 PM

I gave birth to my daughter 3 days ago and she is the most amazing thing I've ever seen so at least I have that to be grateful for.
But I am also almost always on the verge of breaking down because I think I'm a bit traumatised by what happened during her birth. I haven't really spoken to anyone, they all agree I had a hard labour and that things could have gone differently but they all focus on the positive, which I should too and I do, but I can't help feeling down about the state of myself physically now.

I went into labour the night before her due date at 10pm and had regular contractions for most of the night. They weren't that painful though so I just sat through them; I was just so excited at that stage that this was all finally happening. The next day, my contractions continued and increased in strength. That night, at 11:45pm on her due date, we went to hospital. I was told I was 6cm dilated and started hanging out in the birthing pool. I thought everything was going well, contractions continued, getting stronger but not really closer together (always about 5+ minutes apart). After 4 hours, they checked me again and told me there had been no progress, I was still only 6cm. The midwife said she was going to break my waters, which she did, but after doing this, she couldn't find the baby's heartbeat. I think she lied to us, she tried to say my heartbeat was the baby's - I was very nervous and so my heart rate was high, but the heart rate matched my own so we knew it wasn't. This lasted a good 5-10 minutes, and maybe because I'd been in pain for so long and hadn't slept in so long, I had a pretty bad episode. I shut down because I thought something had happened to my baby and I didn't trust the midwife at all because she had lied to us (or was just incompetent).  

The midwife then spent ages pushing around inside me trying to fit a heart rate monitor to the baby's head, but was unable to. It was very painful for me and quite traumatic. She called another midwife after about 10 minutes, who was able to fit it within 15 seconds and we had a heart beat again.

They then moved me to another room so that someone else could have the spa, and told me I had to start on syntocinon. They said I would likely need pain relief, and so a very young lady came in (my mum actually asked her whether or not she'd administered an epidural before) and gave me an epidural. It worked well.

This went on for a while and I dilated to 9cm. Then the pain started to get really bad, and at this point, we discovered the epidural had come undone - it was still in my back but the iv going into me had somehow come out. I was advised that I needed to have a new one done due to hygiene concerns, but now my contractions were much stronger and only a minute apart so I was struggling with staying still for a second insertion. The new epidural only worked on one side of my body. They kept giving me more but it wasn't touching my right side.

After a few more hours went by, I started throwing up from the pain and became a bit delusional. I kept passing out mid conversation and according to my partner, muttering random sentences about making keys and bat caves etc.

My mother asked for a doctor, one came in and assessed me and said that although I was fully dilated, the baby was in the wrong position and would need to be turned. He attempted to do this with his hands but was unable to. He then said he would able to do this with forceps and that he would take me down to theatre now.

Unfortunately, another woman started haemorrhaging and he needed to see to her first. So I was waiting another 1.5 hours in pain with my syntocinon at 120. I was completely delusional by this stage, the pain was overwhelming and impossible. My blood pressure started to rise, I was dry retching, blacking out and then the baby's heart rate started to climb. By now I had been having contractions (and not sleeping, eating or drinking) for 3 days. My mum started to panic because they started checking all my stats every minute and more people started coming into the room.

Finally, the doctor returned and I was taken to theatre. Because now both baby and myself were showing signs of distress, they had to also prepare me for a C-section. I was finally given some pain killers but I don't know what they were - my legs fell asleep completely but I didn't care anymore. I had my legs up in stirrups, 11 doctors/ anaesthetists etc in the room and the doctor went in with the forceps. I couldn't feel pain but it was still a very unpleasant sort of feeling. That said, I was in no position to really discuss anything.

He asked me to push, I did, maybe 3 times and he got the baby out. I heard her screaming and I was so happy that she sounded ok. They gave her to me, they said we couldn't do delayed cord clamping and they got my placenta out 3 minutes later. The doctor then told me I'd been cut and that he had to stitch me up. I felt so distanced from the whole thing.

I'm home now, I have my baby and she seems healthy, she got 9 on her APGAR scores and past everything with flying colours - the report says she was born in excellent condition at just over 4kg.

But I don't know what to do about myself. They made me stay for 2 nights, but no-one would discuss anything with me - they just kept saying everything was normal or that I need to see someone else for that. So far, I can hardly walk due to pain 3 days later, when I do I feel kind of like something is going to fall out of me, I have greatly reduced bladder and bowel control (I have had a few accidents) and though it's perhaps the least of the problems, 3 very painful haemorrhoids.

I have read some very scary things about forceps and episiotomies, I guess I just wanted to know, does anyone have any good recovery stories? At the moment, I feel a bit like I'm broken and won't heal and that I would have been better off with a C-section and I'm very depressed about this.

#2 RedZebra

Posted 06 September 2015 - 12:31 PM

View PostAshling, on 06 September 2015 - 12:16 PM, said:

But I don't know what to do about myself. They made me stay for 2 nights, but no-one would discuss anything with me - they just kept saying everything was normal or that I need to see someone else for that. So far, I can hardly walk due to pain 3 days later, when I do I feel kind of like something is going to fall out of me, I have greatly reduced bladder and bowel control (I have had a few accidents) and though it's perhaps the least of the problems, 3 very painful haemorrhoids.

I have read some very scary things about forceps and episiotomies, I guess I just wanted to know, does anyone have any good recovery stories? At the moment, I feel a bit like I'm broken and won't heal and that I would have been better off with a C-section and I'm very depressed about this.
I will come back soon and help, just trying to get DS to sleep :)
But have had 4 very traumatic births with tons of intervention, and your delivery and the way you feel now is exactly like I was with my first.

What I have quoted is what stands out for me big time, as had the exact same issues. I did recover (and will give you some tips on what will help) but with some of it I think you need to be checked out.

So just quickly before I come back and explain, but how have you been feeling in regards to in general - do you get any dizziness, extreme fatigue, feeling a little odd or spacey or pain (like aches etc) in general that don't feel like the usual crampy bad period pain you often get after birth? Or even a tightening feeling in your chest/abdomen and really severe cramps?

Don't panic if you do have any of that, I will come and explain soon - just that it sounds exactly like how I was and did need some further care, but will help with tips on healing as I was like this and in a very bad way after DD1, even though my other DD's were also traumatic deliveries with forceps. But there was WAY more going after DD 1.

#3 No Drama Please

Posted 06 September 2015 - 12:40 PM

Firstly I have to say how sorry I am that you had such a traumatising birth, it sounds like it was very stressful and exhausting and to be honest from what you've written does not sound like you had the best of care.

Am so glad your baby is totally fine, that's fantastic, you don't need to worry about your beautiful healthy baby at all.

I can only recount my own experience (which was nothing like as bad) however I was in a great deal of pain for quite a while (couldn't walk sit properly etc) and I was just crying all the time from the pain. I wish I had asked the doctor for stronger painkillers because I thought I just had to put up with it but you don't, you can absolutely go to a GP and get proper pain medication. Do you have a GP you can rely on and trust for good advice?

I also think there is a number you can call after a traumatic birth (hopefully someone here can provide it) and they should be able to provide medical and counselling options should you need anything.

I just wanted to say I am absolutely 100% now and you will definitely feel better every day but please get stronger meds if you need them and also hope someone can help with any counselling/information you might require.

Congratulations on your baby and hope you feel better soon xx

#4 mandala

Posted 06 September 2015 - 12:44 PM

I'm sorry you had such a difficult time.

After having DS1 I was so bruised and sore that everything felt very wrong for at least a week. I also had an epidural that didn't work, and forceps, manual removal of placenta (ouch) and an episiotomy that took a good hour to stitch up. I was extremely uncomfortable the first few days, but after four weeks was mostly okay. I did have pain where my stitches were, but that also improved after help from a women's health physio.

Almost four years (and another baby) later and I feel like I did before kids.

I had a visit from the hospital physio before leaving, and followed up afterwards. The advice from them really helped my pelvic floor muscles recover. The midwives and doctors were much less interested and mostly looked at the stitches. Just a different focus, I guess.

Congratulations on your new daughter.

#5 Guest_canadianmum_*

Posted 06 September 2015 - 12:47 PM

Wow, you are amazing to be able to type all that up. I am so sorry about your traumatic birth.

Please monitor your temp and pain and get straight back to the GP if you are at all concerned.

#6 mandala

Posted 06 September 2015 - 12:48 PM

Oh, and the pain relief for your stitches is so important to keep on top of! Take it on schedule, don't wait for it to hurt. The tricky thing is that codeine can cause constipation and make it harder to tell when you need to go, and the laxatives to counteract the constipation can also play havoc with things.

#7 muffin87

Posted 06 September 2015 - 01:53 PM

I also had a traumatic delivery of a 4kg baby. I don't have a good recovery story but I will say rest, rest, rest. Don't lift anything or do too much for a few weeks. Also have a lay down every day to take pressure off your pelvic floor. Use laxatives and empty your bladder regularly even if it doesn't feel full. See a women's physio and shop around until you find a nice gynae. I hope you recover soon.

#8 RedZebra

Posted 06 September 2015 - 02:04 PM

Ok, DS is asleep :)

I imagine things are pretty tough going now as you have this beautiful little baby to enjoy, but am glad to hear she is happy and healthy :)

It's hard when you have a traumatic birth and you have all these emotions going on where you are just totally in love with this gorgeous little soul that has entered your life, but you are struggling with so much pain after the birth.

I had complications with all 4 of my births, the first 3 were VB's. I had forceps and an episiotomies with all, and they were all posterior as well.
I have EDS ( a genetic condition) so epidurals generally don't work on me, except for baby 3 where I had an OB who knew my spinal issues and had requested the epi be done slightly differently. NO idea how, but it actually worked!!

After my second DD (failed epi, forecps etc) who was also well over 4kg, I actually managed to walk from the delivery to the ward only 2 hrs later & recovered really well. With my 3rd DD she went into distress when I was only 5cm & to cut a long story short I had the OB who had delivered my previous baby there, & with a combo of the syntocin running on full, him manually dilating me and me being given 5 minutes while prepped for theatre, with his help I actually did it.
It was by far the easiest birth but the issue afterwards was that I had severe SPD was in agony with pain relief, and couldn't not move to pick my baby up yet had NO help, and had had the call button put out of my reach. I called out for ages but no one came.
She had to sleep in the hospital bed as not one midwife came by, and at about 3am I was so exhausted after 48 hrs of no sleep that I started to doze.
I woke with a start when I felt my baby slipping - she slipped through the rails and I grabbed her before she it the floor, and fell out myself. I couldn't move...that was how the physio and DH found me at 7am.

DH checked me out against all advice so at home he could help while my hips healed, it was shocking.

But with both deliveries I did heal fairly quickly with the stitches etc.

My first birth was a lot like yours. DD was posterior and I lost all control from the pain, the epi didn't work & I literally screamed the place down and begged them to knock me out. It was so scary as I had no control over the pain and I just lost it. My husband actually told me to be quiet. He is now my ex husband :)

DD was slightly stuck and I was just insane from the pain, and couldn't push at all. Obviously the epi hadn't worked & I had a local so they could cut me, and they tried vacuum extraction which failed, then forceps. My home care midwife saw me at home 2 weeks after the birth and examined me, and was horrified - she said I'd literally been butchered, that it was no wonder I was in still in agony. I had no idea.

As I the epi had failed I didn't need a catheter, so they did the whole potty under the bum thing. But the damage was so bad I couldn't physically pee, they ended up having to do a catheter anyway as I was one big swollen mess.

On day 3 I was still being kept in as I still needed the catheter, but found it really hard to try and stand.
I had to walk about 10 metres or so to the nursery as DD needed to go under the lights for an hour due to jaundice, and it was the peadiatrician who noticed I was struggling so badly and made me sit down, and actually intervened when they were going to discharge me & said I needed to be in a bit longer.
On day 4 they took the catheter out I slowly stood up to be able to go and use the loo. Up until then I had felt like what you have described - it felt like my insides were going to fall out and I felt quite heavy, and as this was my first I assumed it was normal.

Bit of a TMI warning here as this is a bit gross!
When I stood up that time I actually really did think everything was about to fall out, and then felt this huge thing fall out of me - I mean huge, it hurt like hell and felt like giving birth all over again.
I was totally freaked out (not surprisingly) and managed to press the buzzer but couldn't move. The heaviness had all gone though.
It was an absolutely massive blood clot, about the size of DD's head. So despite the checks etc for 4 days not one midwife had picked up that my uterus was still big, and that there was this huge mass in there.
I had blood tests and my HG was so low that I ended up having 3 bags of blood, but all the heavy, falling out feeling had gone.

When I was discharged after a week I was still agony from the stitches and the damage, and din't actually know you are supposed to have pain relief until this thread (and I have given birth at 3 different hospitals).
My now ex-husband took the whole "six weeks healing" very seriously and so I believed that my body was fine despite the pain, and he was an a$$ after that one time at six weeks I couldn't have sex as it was way too painful - he just found it elsewhere.

But yep, in that case there was a lot of damage and it did take a long time to heal. I had so much swelling that (and another TMI warning here!) my labia minora had totally split in two on one side, and 16 years on, is still that way. I need plastic surgery to repair it as it does get sore.

So for about 5 weeks after the birth I firstly had a) a blow up donut cushion whch was lifesaver as I couldn't sit otherwise (you can get them from the chemist, and it WILL help, I promise) and b) had baths with a hefty dose of salt in them each day to help heal, which my midwife suggested and did help.

The other thing helped was the high fibre granules they gave me in hospital that makes it much easier to go to the loo, but also using warm water when you need to pee.
It's a bit awkward but if you fill a jug with warm water, lean back as far as possible when you are on the loo, then pour the water over while you are peeing.
Sounds weird I know and it's quite tricky to be able to get in the right position, but lean as far back as possible and just have the spout right up the top against your skin, then pour slowly as you go - it takes the sting out of it & if I hadn't known that little trick I would have been in tears of agony each time, it helped SO much.

Apologies for the usual novel but I hope that may help a bit, and if you do feel unwell at all or even slightly like how i described in my first post, please do get checked out asap. I mean no one midwife picked that up when massaging, and it wasn't until day 4 that it finally came out.

It may just be having such a traumatic birth is what is making you feel like that, but I did feel the exact same way (and didn't with subsequent babies) as though everything was going to fall out, and once the clot came out all that feeling totally vanished.

And it does always help to talk about when you have a traumatic birth, and in hindsight I should have sought more help & proper counselling it did feel like my body had failed me and that things were not really done properly.
Even after the transfusion & leaving hospital, I still didn't feel right and ended up fainting when being fitted for a maternity bra at Bras'n'Things....the poor assistant helping totally freaked out!

So do get lots of rest, let your body heal and absolutely do NOT hesitate to see your GP if you just don't feel right. Take any and all support offered so you can concentrate on you and your baby, and if that means roping in family to come & help then do so.

And a big congrats on your precious little girl :)

#9 Feral Nina

Posted 06 September 2015 - 02:20 PM

I'm so sorry you went through that.

I will post more later but the one thing I wanted to say was that your feelings about this trauma are totally valid. Sure you have healthy baby and that is something to be thankful for, but it doesn't and shouldn't disminish how you are feeling, the two aren't mutually exclusive.

I'm totally disgusted that the hospital didn't offer for you to see the hospital counsellor.

Let it out, cry when you need and lean on your partner and totally seek some counselling. Be kind to yourself.

#10 nessrose

Posted 06 September 2015 - 02:23 PM

I'm sorry you went through that. Congratulations on your little girl though.

My first labour was the worst. Very long, lots of intervention (syntocin, pethedine, waters broken, 2.5 hours of pushing, forceps, episiotomy, large blood loss, blood clots etc).

Am happy to say though that my next 2 labours (1 with twins, the other a singleton), were straight forward, easy with no intervention.

My last was an emergency Caesar after DD5 went into respiratory distress.

I guess all I can say from that is that each birth is different. Take the time to recover. It can take a long time to get back to normal. Sleep deprivation definitely does not help. Also, see someone if you feel the need.

Best of luck.

#11 Expelliarmus

Posted 06 September 2015 - 02:27 PM

My first was over 5kg and I had forceps and an episiotomy. I walked like an old woman for several weeks afterwards.

Physically it did heal but it took 6-8 weeks to feel somewhat normal. You sound like you could use someone to talk to so I would try and see a counsellor to help you unpack things.

Apart from that rest while your body heals.

#12 Paddlepop

Posted 06 September 2015 - 02:52 PM

You're allowed to feel upset about the birth. That's completely valid. You can be happy to have a healthy baby while also being upset about the birth. PANDA is a support organisation in Australia who might be able to help you work through your feelings.

I had an induction, epidural, scalp monitor on baby, catheter, forceps and 4th degree tearing, so similar to you. I refused an episiotomy. I had to be stitched up in theatre afterwards. I had a catheter in for about 24 hours after the birth, and a spinal block for the stitching that took 12 hours to wear off. I had IV antibiotics and antifungals for the next 3 days. I was in hospital for 3 nights after the birth, mainly to look after my injuries. DD was fine apart from forceps marks on her head. They faded after 6-12 months. I have healed up pretty much perfectly and I'm 99% back to normal.

Some things that helped me to recover:
- do NOT use a doughnut cushion. It actually puts more pressure on the perineum and stitching. Instead sit favouring one side of your bottom to avoid sitting on your stitches. Use a soft cushion to sit on.
- lie down for 5-10 minutes every 2 hours to take pressure of the perineum and pelvic area. It will help the pain and swelling. A cold pack on the vulva and perineum can be wonderfully soothing. You can use an ordinary cold pack wrapped in a towel, or a pad that you've soaked with clean water and frozen, or a condom filled with water and frozen.
- avoid standing for long periods.
- do not lift anything heavier than your baby for 6-8 weeks.
- do not push a grocery trolley for 6-8 weeks.
- keep your stitches clean. I was told to use no soap, and just clean warm water, preferably using a hand held shower attachment to wash over the area for a few minutes. I was told to do that twice a day for 7-10 days. I was told to not do salt baths because my hospital found that the salt actually irritated the wounds. Dry your vulva and perineum carefully after your shower. Be gentle and if necessary use a hair dryer on a cool setting to thoroughly dry yourself if a towel is too rough.
- support your perineum when doing a poo. Get a wad of clean toilet paper in your hand and press this up against your perineum while doing a poo. The first poo post-birth was pretty scary and I was sure my stitches were going to tear but they didn't.
- if it stings when you wee then use some warm water to run over your vulva and stitches to dilute the wee and reduce the sting. A squirty water bottle might work better than a jug.
- keep your poo soft. Plenty of water and some medications to help soften the poo if needed.
- keep your pain relief for the first few days to a week. Take it by the clock and don't wait to have pain before you take it.
- if you're struggling with urinary continence then pee by the clock instead of waiting to pee. I had to pee about every hour for the first week, and when I had the urge to pee I couldn't hang on for more than about 1 minute if that. I would have to run to the toilet. That improved greatly once my stitches started to dissolve at 7-10 days.
- do your pelvic exercises.

Make sure you follow up with your GP if you're having ongoing physical issues. If your GP doesn't know what to do get them to refer you to a gynaecologist. Your hospital should also provide some aftercare, like access to a continence nurse and a specialist women's physio. Ask to have a debrief with a midwife at the hospital. They can go through your birth notes with you and help you to understand what happened.

It will get better. Get medical and emotional help if you need it, and go easy on yourself while you heal.

#13 No Drama Please

Posted 06 September 2015 - 03:06 PM

Also maybe try water soluble lavender oil in the bath. The midwife told me to use when I was having pain with the stitches and it worked really well.

Edited by When in Rome, 06 September 2015 - 03:06 PM.

#14 Contrebasse

Posted 06 September 2015 - 03:26 PM

Where are you located OP?

I'm sorry you had  such a terrible experience.  My first baby was over 4 kg too, and I suffered a 3rd degree tear.  I spent nearly 6 weeks on the couch recovering and was still having some symptoms a year later. It eventually did get a lot better though.

A few things I did that helped :
- see a specialist  women's physiotherapist for rehabilitation
-  debrief with a senior consultant at the hospital. I arranged this via the patient advocate  
- follow up scan with the hospital to check healing - the royal women's was good with follow up
-  lots of rest for the first six weeks. Breastfeeding lying down is especially helpful
-  find someone to talk to about how you are feeling emotionally

Best of luck, and I am happy to recommend physios and gynaecologists in Melbourne

#15 RedZebra

Posted 06 September 2015 - 03:49 PM

View PostPaddlepop, on 06 September 2015 - 02:52 PM, said:

Some things that helped me to recover:
- do NOT use a doughnut cushion. It actually puts more pressure on the perineum and stitching. Instead sit favouring one side of your bottom to avoid sitting on your stitches. Use a soft cushion to sit on.

Omg, you're kidding? Damn...I wonder if that's why I took so long to heal?
I had one of those blow up ones and found if I sat in a certain spot it definitely helped (and boy did I look good using that in the food court at a huge mall in Newcastle lol) but did use really soft pillows for the other girls.
And yep, the condoms with ice - or rather rubber gloves with ice in hospital which don't fit quite as neatly lol.

That's really got me wondering now as I was left with a lot of damage but the hospital (John Hunter back in '99) kept saying it was all normal.

I didn't realise the extent of the damage until I had an IUD done after 12 mths and they mentioned that a lot of stitching hadn't been done correctly (I tore further despite the episiotomy) and that there was the obvious damage where I should have had stitches but didn't , and sex was impossible pretty much for the first 6-7 mths, then still quite painful.

So in hindsight using that could have been what was making it worse?

I was actually just thinking too that I'd love to see STBG weigh in - I mentioned how I was encouraged then to have salt baths to speed up the healing but something is just sort of telling me that that's also odd - I'm curious if anyone else was told to do that?

My 3rd DD was obviously delivered in a huge hurry so very much forceps in, baby out asap and don't stop pushing. Very large cut like DD 1 but I recovered really quickly this time.

I just used those big cheap microfibre ones to sit on (2 or piled up) and found it way less painful than the first time.

One funny thing I DO remember being told at JHH was to have several baths a day with the salt, but also to see if I could hold on until I had a bath then when it was emptying, go ahead and pee and just have a quick shower/wash down afterwards lol.
To be honest, as gross as it sounds...yep, I did that few times. It was SO less painful lol.

#16 amaza

Posted 06 September 2015 - 04:06 PM


I'm so sorry you went through that.

I will post more later but the one thing I wanted to say was that your feelings about this trauma are totally valid. Sure you have healthy baby and that is something to be thankful for, but it doesn't and shouldn't disminish how you are feeling, the two aren't mutually exclusive.

I'm totally disgusted that the hospital didn't offer for you to see the hospital counsellor.

Let it out, cry when you need and lean on your partner and totally seek some counselling. Be kind to yourself.

This needs repeating. It's great that you have a healthy baby but your experience and trauma is real and just as valid.

Please get some counselling if you feel like the trauma of the birth isn't going away. Please be kind to yourself.

#17 Paddlepop

Posted 06 September 2015 - 04:07 PM

Feralmamaowl: I know that when I asked about a doughnut cushion after my DD's birth the staff reeled back in horror and told me not to use them. They actually put a lot more pressure on the perineum which will cause more pain and swelling, and they leave it unsupported because it's just kind of hanging there, stretched, in the doughnut hole. There's also something about the blood flow not being good when using a doughnut cushion. I had my DD in 2010, so I guess that knowledge and advice had changed by then. I have no idea why you didn't heal well but it sounds like it wasn't a good birth all around.

#18 Jingleflea

Posted 06 September 2015 - 05:52 PM

I was told in 2010 to NOT have salt baths because they dry the area too  much and your stitches can pull and go all wonky and you'll heal worse.

#19 MrsRC

Posted 06 September 2015 - 06:03 PM

I'm sorry you had a traumatic delivery, but glad that your daughter is safe and well. I had a very traumatic birth in July last year which ended in stillbirth. I ended up with an episiotomy and forceps as well. I had issues with bowel and bladder control early on and could not even sit down as I was so sore. It did get better though. My best piece of advise is to start doing your kegel exercises again as soon as you can. Even if you feel like you're not performing them properly just keep trying. I truely believe that this helped my healing. Best of luck and my thoughts are with you.

#20 gc_melody

Posted 06 September 2015 - 06:45 PM

I'm so sorry OP. It sounds like your aftercare has been totally inadequate. To feel traumatised after a traumatic birth is a normal response and for anyone to say or make you feel otherwise deserves to be excluded from your sphere immediately.

Medicare have item numbers specifically for psychologists to work with women who have trauma from either pregnancy or birth. Here is a link where you can find a psychologist who specialises in pregnancy and birth related trauma. https://www.psycholo...daPsychologist/

I also recommend that you locate a womens physio and a gynae for review and rehab. Please see your GP asap for review. If nothing else, they can reassure you that things are either healing normally or they can refer you to someone who can help you.

Now is the time to call in all favours for practical help. Put the word out now. I'm sure you will find most people will want to be able to do something practical to help you in this time of healing.

Lastly, surround yourself only with people who will emotionally support you. If anyone can't/won't, then kick them to the curb and don't look back. No Mum should be left alone to deal with this. No Mum.

Take care x

#21 Sea_Salt

Posted 06 September 2015 - 08:08 PM

I'm sorry for how your delivery went OP. It will take a while to physically heal, 3 days is still in the thick of things.
I had a vacuum delivery with an episiotomy plus tore which took over an hour to stitch. It was at least a couple of weeks before I could sit for any length of time & probably a couple of months to feel normal again.
I honestly didn't even think to have pain relief bar Panadol don't know what I was thinking there! but making a ice pack like that had in hospital helped me a lot.
To breast feed, I would kind of half sit half lie on the bed/couch so wouldn't have an pressure on that area.

I would definitely talk to the midwife or your doctor at your next appointment about your birth experience though.

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