I HATE BREASTFEEDING. PLS HELP!
I HATE BREASTFEEDING. PLS HELP!
, Jan 10 2005 12:33 PM
24 replies to this topic
Posted 10 January 2005 - 12:33 PM
On Wednesday my DD will be 3 wks old. I have had maybe one or two feeds where I was not in agony.
The first two weeks, I had cracked and blistered nipples which were bleeding.
On Saturday, just to top it off, I was diagnosed with severe mastitis, affecting more than half of my breast and put on antibiotics.
Just to make this all more fun, I now have to express both breasts twice per day in addition to feeding 6 times per day, to get rid of the antibiotics in order to avoid it affecting my baby.
I never for a second considered that failing to breastfeed was an option, but I am now seriously considering putting her on formula. I figure she has already had the advantage of 3 weeks worth of breast milk, which is surely better than nothing? I can't stand the thought of the next feed and am not sure that this is the end of it. She has now started pulling off a perfect latch to end up with my nipple in her mouth. No amount of relatching can fix this. Each time she perfectly latches on, only to pull her head away until she is only left with my nipple. My nipples are aching and I am scared that soon they will start cracking and bleeding again.
Can anyone please either tell me to stop being a wuss, or to stop procrastinating and going out to buy formula. I hate the thought of putting her on the bottle, because I always thought of b/f as something that her and I alone will share and have visions of the inlaws playing pass the parcel with her and wanting to feed her everytime they are here.
I am fearful of ringing the ABA, as I know I will be made to feel even more guilty than I already do. Guilt I already have enough of for hating every feeding session, for cringing when she latches on and for willing her to stay asleep to give my breasts a longer break. I would love to just pop her on for a comfort feed when she is not feeling well, but I choose to let her dad or my mum comfort her so she can't smell my milk and start nuzzling and sucking her fists.
Sorry, this probably belongs in the venting board, but I just need to hear what everyone else thinks. I guess I just need a really good argument either way to make up my mind.
Posted 10 January 2005 - 12:55 PM
Ouch, Tombi, doesn't sound like a lot of fun.
One bit of advice I got when I saw a councellor that helped me a lot. I didn't have quite the pain that you've had, but I hated feeding, couldn't wait for it to be over.
The councellor said "Don't worry about these feelings you're having. In Western society breastfeeding is made out to be some magical, wonderful, bonding experience whereas in the past it was something women had to do to keep their babies alive."
Since then when I get down in the dumps about it, I think about how this is keeping my baby alive.
I wish I could make the pain disappear for you, but I can't, all I can hope is that I've made it a bit more bearable for you.
Dog Monty 2.5
DD Lydia Charlotte 14/10/04
Posted 10 January 2005 - 01:01 PM
Don't feel guilty. Breastfeeding can be really tough. I have had only one good week of my baby's first seven and I don't even have cracked or bleeding nipples.
If you have really had enough, go to formula and give yourself credit for trying in the face of real adversity. If you want to keep trying, you could try nipple sheilds to give your nipples a rest until they heal properly.
I would also suggest speaking to a lactation consultant (at the hospital you delivered at) as there are often really simple things to do to help baby latch back on properly (and mine did this too!)
good luck and best wishes
DD arrived 19/11/04
Posted 10 January 2005 - 01:12 PM
Oh big hugs Tombi. If it helps, you could be singing my song.
I've never been able to b/f any of my children. Had the exact thing happen with my third, as you have experienced.
I was b'fing with a rolled up flannel in my mouth so that the neighbours wouldn't hear me screaming from the pain of my shredded nipples. It got so bad, I couldn't even pick up my baby (or even hug my other children), and the ABA's only advice was "Just feed through the pain". I also ended up in hospital with severe mastitis. It took 9wks for my nipples to finally heal.
Is this starting to effect the feelings you have for your baby? Constant agony, attachment problems, continuual pumping (very tiring I know) can really start to wear thin, and you can begin to 'resent' the baby (all this comes from my experience, so may not be true for you).
Have you considered going to a day-stay in your area, specifically for b'fing? If you are absolutely desperate to b/f, then this might be worth considering.
Finally, have to say that mothering is so much more
than feeding the baby. If you decide to start formula feeding, get rid of the guilt and don't look back. That old saying is very true - "Happy mum, happy baby". Your baby will love you just the same, you'll still share special moments with her in her life. There will be plenty of moments where she will look at you and you will know that you "rock her world".
HTH, I can't tell you what you should do, only empathise and support you in your decision. Feel free to pm me at any time
Terrific TeAre 2000
Excellant Evie 2002
Lovely Leila 2004
Posted 10 January 2005 - 01:34 PM
I don't know that this is the response that you want, or that it will be very popular. But I couldn't read this without contacting you.
I felt the way you do when my son was born. I wanted to breastfeed,it had never occured to me that I would not. It was something that I always knew I would do.
And then I had Alexander. I tried. Xander was in the special care nursery for 5 days after he was born, and I would go to him every 2-3 hours to try to feed him. He was jaundiced, and had very low blood sugar (I am diabetic)so he needed frequent feeds. We just had so much trouble, he and I working this out! He just couldn't get a decent latch on. No matter how hard the midwives tried to teach me, it was so hard. And the times that he did, he would suck for 30 seconds or so, then fall off. Or suck for a minute, and then because he was so drousy (jaundice and blood sugar), he would fall asleep and fall off. So he was constantly hungry, and my nipples were constantly hurting.
I came home with him after a week in hospital, determined that once we were home in our own beds, it would be better. It wasn't. I just could not do it. I started to be terrified of him, just so afraid that he would wake up, and I would have to feed him! It sounds silly now, but I was so scared of my own child! I knew I was in trouble, when i put him in his bassinet, the day after we got home. I sat on my bed, and tried to think of the quickest, least messy way that I could kill myself before he woke up for his next feed! It sounded like the most logical solution to me at the time! These were my first EVER thoughts of suicide.
Fortunatley, my husband and mother worked out what was going on quickly, and took me to the hospital. The DR and the midwife sat me down and told me they would make me a deal. I could go home that night, with Alexander. Provided that I took a sleeping tablet in front of them, and promised to buy bottles and formula on the way home. My husband had to promise them that he would do all of Xander's feeds that night, so I could get some sleep. Or they would admit me, give me the sleeping tablets, and SEND XANDER HOME with Joel, with bottles and formula! Not much of a choice, you see. Either way, they said, breast feeding was not going to work for me. They said, some people just can't do it, and it is unhealthy for me and for Alexander to persist. (It actually turned out that I was SO stressed, that my milk had dried up anyway!).
So, I chose to go home, and bottle feed. I tried expressing, but as mentioned, there was no milk. It never came in, just colostrum! So within a day or two, the decision was made that we would exclusively bottle feed. I immediately felt a weight lifted off me. That doesn't mean that it was an easy decision to make. It wasn't. I agonized over it. But once made, I felt such relief! And suddenly, I had a happy baby, who was now getting enough to eat.
I know this is an extreme case, and very long. I am sorry for that. But my point is, that as wonderful as breast feeding is (and we all know it is!), it isn't for everyone. Sometimes the best parenting decision we can make, is to just be decisive. Make the decision, and then get on with it. You will probably find your baby is a little more settled, as she won't be so hungry.
As for worrying about relatives wanting to feed her all the time. That is up to you. If you aren't comfortable, just say,that even though you aren't BF, you want to have that bond with your baby, and would prefer to do all the feeds for the time being. Who knows, you might enjoy the break and the little bit of freedom that bottle feeding gives you.
It was a great thing for us. My husband did at least 50% of the feeds when he was home (including at night)and was able to bond so much with Alexander. They are now inseperable!
Sorry this is so long. But you sound like me, and I couldn't not respond. If you want to persist with breast feeding, then give it a go. But if you don't think that you can, then don't let anyone make you feel bad about it.
PM me if you want to talk more about it. ((((hugs))))
Alexander Jordan 11/02/03
Posted 10 January 2005 - 03:03 PM
For starters, I am so so sorry that you are having so many problems, it's not fair everyone says it's the most natural thing in the world and when I had my first i found out they were dead wrong. I too suffered cracked bleeding nipples and dreaded every single feed for the first 6wks (would cry out in pain and cry all through her feeds) but after about 6wks they healed and from then on i basically had no real dramas I managed to feed her for 12months and now with bub no.2 i had no problems at all (boobs probably remember!!), I wish someone had suggested Lansinoh in the first 2wks as I think this would have made a difference, it heals your nipples super quickly. Another suggestion was to sit out in the sun (with your nips in the breeze and let the sun at them for small periods of time so they can dry out probably only 5-10mns a few times a day).
I also found that feeding in different positions each feed so the baby latches to different sides of the breast..... i fed from the foot ball pass (baby tucked under the same side arm that you are breast feeding from... lol does this make sense??) another one was to feed laying down in bed on say your left side put baby down beside you on their side and feed from your left boob... hope this makes sense??? All of these have slightly different latching positions and will give you some relief (I hope).
Also as another person suggested us nipple shields, I never ended up using them but i have heard that in extreme situations they work a treat.... Also what hospital did you have bubs in?? If it was private they usually have a lactation consultant that you could call and get advise from.....
Lastly, please if you are really over the breastfeeding thing then switch to formula as i don't know about you but i can't tell which adults were breast feds as babies and those that were bottle fed!! lol
No one can make that decision for you as we don't know how much more you can tolerate... I was very determined to b/f (my mother would not have it any other way, hated her at the time but looking back i am glad as it made me push on that bit more and i got through it) but if you are miserable and beginning to hate your baby nothing is worth that and believe me... no mother is a failure for giving up b/f you gave it your best shot, congratulate yourself on that!!!! just approach one feed at a time and don't look any further ahead....
And if you do switch to the bottle you don't have to let others feed baby if you dont want to !!!! it's your choice, if they get sh*tty if you say no, just say that because you aren't b/f now you still want to feed baby as you want the same closeness.. theres nothing wrong with that, they can wait and have a cuddle later!!
Anyway sorry to ramble on soooo much I just wanted to say good luck and I feel for you... please pm me if you want to ask any question or just for support... you are a great mother and be proud of yourself!!!
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Posted 10 January 2005 - 03:20 PM
You sound exactly like me! With number one i had such bad cracks and bleeding and the ABA said 'feed through the pain', so i did, not knowing any better. Second time and my baby was only 2 weeks prem and had no idea of what to do. After 36 hours and four or five B/F i decided to express to give my already cracked nipples a rest. A midwife then came in and said to me' Do you really want to breast feed your baby'? I said not if i have this pain again. She then said, 'Well don't or you will end up feeling bad towards your baby every time you go to feed her' So i decided that i would express and bottle feed her for as long as i could, then put her on formula. I am hoping to make three months, but if not, i am not worried, she will be healthy even if she has to go on formula. That is why formula was invented... for those of us who cant or dont want to breastfeed. Dont feel bad, just ask yourself, 'Do you really want to feed your baby?', It was the best question someone has ever asked me! Good Luck
DS Sam (30/10/02)
DD Asha (20/12/04)
Posted 10 January 2005 - 03:23 PM
I won't be all "motherhood"ish about this (pardon the pun).
-Go out and buy formula, bottles, steriliser, Milton tablets, etc.
-Get set up.
-Get DH to do at least 50 % of feeds.
-Have a rest and take care of yourself.
With #1, I couldn't B/F for the same reasons as you. It was agony and really affected the bonding with Jeremy. With #2, no milk but stuck a bottle in Toby's gob on Day 1. NOt a problem since.
I know EXACTLY how you feel. Yes breast is best - if the system works which it isn't at the moment for you. So ignore all the breastfeeding advice, blah, blah, get him on the bottle and get yourself sorted (i.e. rested and well). Once you are feeling better, you can take time to reconsider, if that is what you wish to do.
DS Tobias Barbie EDD #3 02/02/05 http://tinypic.com/wmryw
Posted 10 January 2005 - 03:28 PM
I think that despite what a lot of people say, breastfeeding doesn't come naturally to everyone, and not everyone can do it, and at the end of the day, the most important thing is being able to love and enjoy your baby. Anyway, when you look at a bunch of kids who are no longer being breast or bottle fed, you really can't tell the difference!
I had two premmature babies, and with my first, was pressured into persisting with breastfeeding, when I quite clearly had no milk supply and, in my opinion, to the detriment of my tiny baby, who also had a heart condition, all they saw was 'breast was best'. With my second, I gave it a go, but when my milk supply hadn't come in, and my small baby was again losing weight, I very quickly put him on the bottle.
I can honestly tell you I have no regrets and I can not see how my babies have missed out in any way not being breast fed. I still made bottle feeding a special bonding time, and only me and my husband fed our babies, not any of the outlaws. That was something I insisted on and was quite strong with them about.
Please don't feel guilty, there are so many other ways to be a good mother apart from breastfeeding.
Hannah - 27/04/01
Lachlan - 18/04/04
Posted 10 January 2005 - 04:28 PM
Tombi, I have been exactly where you are with a different solution each baby I had. Without subjecting you to my very long story, I only have 3 things to say to you...
1) Buy some Lansinoh cream right now and try it. Don't wash it off before feeding, and use it as much as you like - it is a miracle cream and the only reason I was able to bf my 4th.
2) The mastitus won't dissappear if/when you stop bf. You will still have to drain and massage your breasts and they will still be very sore, but...
3) Don't hesitate to buy some forumla and bottles if that's what you need to do to enjoy your baby. I still have bonding probs with my 10yr old because I persisted and hated every second of feeding him! And I only fed him for 9mths.
And lastly, big hugs, you will get through this, and remember how many of us have been there. I'm sure sometimes breastfeeding is harder than the actual labour in some cases!
And it is quite possible with the Lansinoh cream you may even be able to continue to breastfeed if you wish.
Good luck and let us know how you get on.
Me 32, DH 33
DS#1 10yrs, Brendan
DS#2 9yrs, Daniel
DS#3 4yrs, Ashley
DD Stephanie 18/12/03
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Posted 10 January 2005 - 04:30 PM
Just wanted to add, after using the Lansinoh cream with my 4th bub, I loved breastfeeding so much and cried when she weaned herself at 8mths. It is possible to enjoy breastfeeding, but it is also possible to hate it - have experienced both.
Posted 10 January 2005 - 04:45 PM
Sorry you are having such a hard time with breastfeeding.
How strongly do you feel about it? Is it something which you still, in your heart, want to work out?
I can tell you personally, I wanted to breastfeed because it has sooo many benefits, and not just obvious health ones either. I knew this when I was pregnant, and wanted so badly for it to work out.....it does "look" easy doesn't it? Reality is, it isn't in a lot of cases.
I had cracked, bleeding nipples for all of my babies, but the first two were the worst. I had the same resentment and fear for that inevitable next feed....it was mind consuming, and lasted 6 weeks. I could only feed at home where noone else could see the tears of pain.....I just gritted my teeth for the first minute or so....a pain worse that labour!! Once I got through that it went numb! I often wondered how much blood was in my milk!
I used the "magic" Lanisoh too! It was my saviour...otherwise who knows how long it could've gone on for!
I wish I knew about nipple shields. My friend used them on advice of a LC, just to let her nipples "heal". She would them try again without them. She used them on and off for a year as she had reoccuring blisters and grazes...but I admire her for sticking it out like that!
Other mothers solely express for every feed. I chat to a couple on another forum.....MUCH admiration there, their dedication to breastfeed is enormous. One of these mothers has a two year old who is fed this way still.
I know I owed it to my baby to at least get as much help as I could, before resorted to formula......luckily i didn't need to. I had plenty of friends who told me just to get a bottle and be done with it, but that's not really doing everything I could is it?
I would urge you to get advise from a couple of different sources, and if the conclusion is to bottle feed, then this will at least give you some "closure" that you HAVE done the right thing.
And please don't be embarrassed to ring an ABA counsellor.....they have heard it a thousand times before...they will not make you feel guilty I promise. They are there to help you, not judge you.
I am still breastfeeding my 18 month old and it is the most beautiful experience...I would hate to see you give that away in a whim.
DD Jade (9/3/97)
DS Andrew (10/2/99)
DD Cheyenne (26/9/01)
DD Alicia (9/7/03)
This message was edited by Hmmmm on Monday, 10 January 2005 @ 5:46 PM
Posted 10 January 2005 - 05:10 PM
I too have had cracked nipples and mastitis and sat crying at every feed as I was in agony, my back too.
I perservered as I was determined not to give up and you know what, it is now the easiest thing in the world.
Please talk to whoever you can to get help as I could easily have given up without it. At least if you decide formula is the way to go you know you tried.
I don't know what antibiotics you have but the ones I had I could feed DS no problem.
Best of luck with it
DS (Still Little)
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Posted 10 January 2005 - 08:05 PM
Sorry wrong area.
This message was edited by megrobjake on Monday, 10 January 2005 @ 9:12 PM
Posted 11 January 2005 - 12:45 AM
Hi , I spent the First 8 wks Trying to feed a premmie baby who had a VERY tiny mouth very hard to get to get a good mouthful of breast into such a tiny mouth so it didn't hurt , she then went through major Breast Refusal , I was a mess I got Depression which I strugled with for months , I felt like a failure ,and the worst thing was I was resenting her when she would not latch on and cause I could not feed her , I sware If I had it over again with her I would have put her on the bottle to begin with , its not worth the Precious time when they are little , And I have only learnt now its your relationship with your baby what counts NOT how its fed , DS Went through Breast Refusal as well but he also had a Major heart op at 6 wks and Bad refulx so he had to go on formula anyhow and you know what It did not bother me one bit , cause Nearly loosing him has made me realise whats really importantin life .
I would not bother with the ABA , There advice can Make you Guilty even when they have noidea what is best For you and your bubs , they only see Breasting feeding is the ONLY way ,
Take care , hope you work it out
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Posted 11 January 2005 - 04:10 AM
Breastfeeding must be important to you, otherwise you wouldn't have bothered posting this message.
I went through the same thing as you with my second baby, would just like to offer some encouragement that things cabwork out. I just weaned him and he's 22 mths.
yes it was tough, but a good lactation consultant, a nipple shield, a breast pump, some good information on the perfect latch (and it would seem in your case, how to keep baby there), and a decent dose of persistence (which you obviously already have, otherwise you wouldn't have come this far) things sorted out at about six weeks.
One option for a 'break' is just to exclusively express, (rather than feed the baby at the breast) until your nipples (and your feelings and fears) settle down abit. This really worked for me, I was so worked up about the whole feeding thing, I couldn't bond with the baby. I was tensing up even before baby got to the boob, expressing gave me that break.
I found also with both my babies, everything seemed to settle down at about 6 weeks. Maybe you could set this as an initial goal, pump/nipple shield til then, hopefully your mastitis will be gone by then and you'll feel better generally.
I've always found the ABA very helpful - you don't have to take on any of their suggestions, a couple of times I rang mainly to whinge that "I can't stand this any more" and they were gently encouraging.
Hope everything works out for you.
Posted 11 January 2005 - 07:03 AM
I agree totally with Renee about the ABA. I have rung them many times over the past 10 yrs I have been 'breeding' and unless you are extremely dedicated to breastfeeding, their advice can be onesided. Just enjoy your baby, and please try the Lansinoh.
Me 32, DH 33
DS#1 10yrs, Brendan
DS#2 9yrs, Daniel
DS#3 4yrs, Ashley
DD Stephanie 18/12/03
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Posted 11 January 2005 - 08:20 AM
If you perservere with breast feeding - it WILL get easier and you will grow to Love it and what its doing for your baby. You only get the chance for such a short time in your babies life. Breast feeding n the long run is SO much more convenient for you as well. Contact ABA for some support - they will listen to you and understand - remember they have heard it alot of times before.
Posted 11 January 2005 - 08:47 AM
First of all, thank you to everyone who responded to my post. It reminded me what EB was all about, support, advice and understanding.
I went out yesterday and bought a nipple shield and a can of formula. Fed her by breast all of yesterday and then gave her formula through the night and breast again this morning.
As I am on antibiotics, I need to express constantly and discard the milk, hence why I went with formula in the night. I really needed the sleep and to give my boobies a rest. DH totally supported my decision and loved feeding our DD.
My thoughts are to keep expressing the milk and discard, this way ensuring that she doesn't get the antibiotics (it gave her smelly diarrhoea), but at the same time, my breasts still produce enough milk for her.
She sucks everything that is put in her mouth (she is a bit of a fist sucker from her in utero days) and I doubt that she will refuse the breast later on. If she does, it is simply something that I will deal with.
The huge weight off my shoulder has already improved my relationship with my DD, she is much calmer and slept very well last night. I figure she was picking up on my stress too and this was affecting her. It was another addition to my guilt, as I was so relaxed during my whole pg, didn't work, just rested, walked and enjoyed life. This gave us a calm baby, but I was busy making her into a stressed out baby... Also, DH is not petrified of being around me anymore! ;p
BTW - I've tried Lansinoh, but found that I healed quicker with just EBM, as the Lansinoh stayed wet for so long and I couldn't sit with my boobs out for long enough to let it dry properly. The EBM dried much quicker.
Once again thank you for all the advice and support, it is great to know that there are many women who have been through this too.
Posted 11 January 2005 - 09:03 AM
If you are hating BF the I would advise you to stop it. The best thing you can do for you and your bub is to do what makes you BOTH happy.
My daughter breasfed for the first 4 weeks, she wanted to do the 'right thing' for bub. In the end DD was in pain, bub was bringing most of the milk back up, which frustrated DD more and often had her almost in tears as she felt a 'failure'.
Eventually one very sore breast day I suggested we try formula, well best move ever!!
Bub loved it, mum had a day off for boobs to recover. We tried the following day back on breast, but bub just spewed and pooped it all out again, so back on to LF formula and there we have stayed.
The end result is we no longer have an unsettled bub that is spewing all her milk up and with diarroeah PLUS we have a much happier mum. Breast milk obviously wasn't suiting her.
Now we take it in turns to do night feeds and this also allows me some bonding time while feeding bub.
Although breast feeding is considered 'best' it is not always what works best. Our bub obviously was not thriving on it and is now a changed bub on formula.
I think the big push push for breastfeeding is making a lot of mums feel like failures when they don't succeed at it or don't enjoy it.
For those that for some reason cannot or do not want to BF they should not be made to feel guilty or pushed into doing it, instead they should be praised for trying and encoured to try what is best for them and bub even if it is formula.
I didn't feed my daughter for more than a month as she was sickly and unhappy on it even though I enjoyed it and had no problems or pain, once on formula she thrived. My mum was the same with her kids, she couldn't feed any of us as we didn't tollerate her milk either.
So my advice is 'go out and buy that formula' and enjoy your time with your bub.
Posted 11 January 2005 - 10:31 AM
I was in pure agony too when my DD was born... It lasted for about two weeks.
You sound very similar to me... I dreaded each feed because I was in so much pain for the whole feed and the pain didn't subside at all. I also got severe mastitis and was on antibiotics.
The turning point for me was the way I held her. The midwives in the hospital insisted that I hold DD with the opposite arm to the side I was breastfeeding on, supporting her head (if that makes sense). At around two weeks old, I started the cradling position (same arm side as the breast) and all of a sudden it got better from there and everything cleared up.
I seriously considered formula until I had this breakthrough!
I dont know if this will help at all, but its worth a try. I really hope it gets better for you, because its not enjoyable at all when you are in so much pain. Good luck
DD Brenna Rose 24/09/2004
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Posted 11 January 2005 - 01:01 PM
The ABA are one sided but it's because they are a breastfeeding support service, so it is generally people who require help with breastfeeding who call them.
I found them to be fantastic without dishing out guilt. The counsellors I spoke to had all been where I was and it was reassuring to hear people who 'made it to the other side' - the enjoyable side of breastfeeding. I was miserable for the first 6 weeks of DD's life - my supply was in question, I had cracked bleeding nipples, a bout of mastitis and painful lumps. I was also expressing after every feed (and getting a grand 5ml! as if it wasn't all depressing enough). I used to latch her on and suck in my breath, and just let the tears roll.
You sound like breastfeeding is important to you - the best advice I got was to take one feed at a time rather than looking at the long term picture. Have you tried a nipple shield? A friend used one and she said it was great.
I won't tell you to stop being a wuss because I don't think you are. For a minority, it's easy peasy but for the rest of us it's a skill to be learned and fine tuned over time. But I wont tell you to go and buy formula either.
PS. After all my dramas and tears, my daughter weaned herself last week. She is nearly 2.
Posted 11 January 2005 - 02:26 PM
It sounds like you are now getting some more confidence back and you will find that it will make a huge difference!! Babies pick up alot on emotions, particularly if you are stressed and tense... so by using the nipple shields this will hopefully stop the pain (and give your boobs a chance to heal) in a few days or so you should be right to take them off and try again ,but if they start to even go a little yucky then wack those shields back on so you don't get more damage.
You are doing a wonderful job!!! in the end it doesn't matter how a baby is fed as long as it gets fed... Do what works for you and your bubs and enjoy as they grow so quickly.
That being said having b/f both my girls life is alot easier when out not to have to worry if i have enough formula, etc.... my car broke down twice and it took 2hrs to get home (much longer than I anticipated being out) thank god i could just put her on the boob and not have to worry about a hungry screaming baby as well as the car!!! It's all about convenience.
Good luck!! How long do you have to take the antibiotics for??? Surely there are other antibiotics that can be taken that don't affect the baby.... maybe ring the Aust Breast Asso. they would know!!
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Posted 11 January 2005 - 02:45 PM
10 point for persistance. I always feel horrible when I say I hate Bfing but I would feel guilty (within myself) about giving up. I had masitis with Keyarna 3 times but managed to fix the problem by clearing the ducts (plently of puss TMI) myself. I fed her for 6 1/2 months and gave up for the wrong reasons. I am stil going strong with Ronan and not looking at giving up to soon. He has managed to avoid a few viral illness due to me getting the flu first, something most bottle fed babies can't usually avoid.
However, even though I am a firm believer in BFing, I do agree that "Breast is not always best" and there are many people already posted that can back that up. They have not failed in anyway but done exactly the opposite. They have reconised that the switch from BM to formula is a much needed positive addition to their parenting.
I do encourage you you persist but remember - Your relationship with you munchkins is much more important than his food source.
I have a spare set of nipple shields (Avent) that I haven't used if you want them. They were included with a breast pump I bought off e-bay.
[center]Cindy 31 Dean 26
Keyarna 9/9/96 6lb14oz Ronan 10/7/04 8lb3oz
Posted 12 January 2005 - 10:54 AM
Hello - even though you have had a lot of responses, I felt the need to respond since your story is so similar to mine.
I really just wanted to let you know that giving formula feeds while you give your nipples time to heal and yourself time to express does not necessarily mean the end of breastfeeding. When my baby was between 3 and 9 weeks old he had 3 breastfeeds, 3 EBM feeds and one bottle of NanHA per day. If I didn't get enough milk through expressing he had 2 bottles of formula.
When my nipples healed and I got over the mastitis, I tried increasing the breastfeeds. By nine weeks I was fully breast feeding again.
I bypassed the ABA (this was my second baby and I had tried everything they had to offer) and went straight to a lactation consultant. She was very pro-breastfeeding, and would not make the decision for me to use formula supplements, but once I had made that decision she encouraged me to think of formula as a tool to help me breastfeed longer and this was excellent advice.
I really wanted to breastfeed for many reasons - severe food allergy in the family and the wonderful long term closeness and health benefits that I had experienced with number one child.
I know many people have experienced the relief of early weaning after painful breastfeeding and because of their postive experience they will promote that option. But if you really want to breastfeed, you don't have to make that decision in the middle of the crisis period you are experiencing. It can be done when you are feeling physically and emotionally strong.
My son is 16 months old now and we are still happily breastfeeding so I can look back on the early weeks of hell and feel that I made the right decision for me.
(BTW I am not anti ABA - the counsellors are educated and well meaning but don't have the time and/or expertise to help in all situations. Certainly they are not supposed to advocate the use of formula to fix breastfeeding problems, whereas this was crucial for me.)
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