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Third degree tears
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Posted 13 March 2016 - 06:21 PM
Just after some advice. I gave birth to my DS in December and unfortunately got third degree tears (3b) and was wondering how long it took for "things" to go back to normal. I apparently have to take benefibre for the rest of my life and for subsequent births, I have to have a c section. TMI, I'm also scared of DTD and hubby has been so patient and is going to wait but I'm missing it. I don't have faecal or urine incontinence so hoping it stays that way.
I'm still disappointed that I even got the third degree tears.
Thanx again for any advice
Posted 13 March 2016 - 06:43 PM
Congratulations on your new son. I'm sorry you had such a rough birth.
This is not personal experience but that of my best friend. She had third degree tears from her first birth (forceps, brow presentation). She said it took about 6 months to feel "normal" down there. She had physio for quite a while and had sex for the first time about 12 weeks after birth which she said was uncomfortable but not painful. She didn't have ongoing incontinence and everything healed well.
She has subsequently had two big (over 4kg) babies vaginally with no tearing (1 stitch with the second and none with the third). She changed from public to private care with a very low intervention ob who was supportive of helping her through a vaginal delivery without damage. She also used an epi no device.
I guess what I'm saying is it might take a little while but you will likely go back to "normal" and potentially have a vaginal birth without damage in the future if this is what you want (& depending on the cause of your tears).
Posted 13 March 2016 - 06:57 PM
I had third degree tearing for my first. I couldn't really walk much for a few months and I did take Metamucil for quite a while but everything is fine now and I even went on to have another baby (minimal tearing second time).
I was told by the midwife to have hot baths with water soluble lavender oil and that really helped healing and the stitches/healing (I know you don't have stitches but may still help).
I don't know if you are still in pain but if you are find a GP to give you a prescription for something. I didn't and just kept waiting but it was so painful, I wish had asked.
Apart from that have you had your post delivery check? I know I didn't for the longest time as quite honestly I was petrified of any contact at all but having it checked was good to make sure the healing was ok.
I really feel for you as I remember how raw and vulnerable I felt but honestly everything is pretty much back to normal now it just takes time,
All the best
Posted 13 March 2016 - 07:03 PM
I had the same 3b tear with my first (nearly 6 years ago). I've had another two kids via c-section and mush prefer the c-section.
Everything is pretty much back to normal now down there.
Posted 13 March 2016 - 07:48 PM
I had 3b tearing with my first also, was pretty uncomfortable for awhile afterwards and DTD was honestly not very enjoyable for a good 12 months (though I was breastfeeding which may have contributed to that).
I did however go on to have a 2nd vaginal birth with not even a graze. I was very worried in the lead up to my 2nd birth but my dr and midwife were amazing.
I've also had no long term issues, by my physio helped a lot with that. Can you access the physio at your local hospital? That's who I ended up seeing
Posted 13 March 2016 - 09:42 PM
I had an episiotomy with my first and still sustained third degree tearing. They are in their teens and I have never been the same, and I remember the pain like it was yesterday.
However I had a vaginal delivery with my second, it was not a case of automatic C-section at all. I had an episiotomy with my second due to all the scar tissue from the first but there was no tearing at all and it did not make things worse, although not sure how they could have been worse.
I had to stay in longer than usual after my first due yo the tearing, 6 or 7 days from memory and twice a day I had to go off with the physio to sit in special hot and cold fanny baths (yep - charming, I know) and subsequently had to see the physio for follow up. Complete waste of time for me but it seems to work wonders for some people so definitely investigate a physio who is well experienced with this.
I require surgery to try and fix the resultant issues but have put it off for years, supposedly a long recovery time & limited to what you are meant to do in that time which I can't justify, one day when the kids have licenses and I don't want to save my leave for school hols etc I'll do it.
Edited by Mumsyto2, 13 March 2016 - 09:44 PM.
Posted 13 March 2016 - 09:53 PM
Things will never be normal down there. You pushed a baby out. But, there will be a different kind of normal.
I think that expecting to need to take benefibre for the rest of your life is excessive assuming you have a good fibrous diet. Not having any incontinence is definitely a positive!
Dtd is always scary no matter whether your had a 4th degree tear or a graze. On that, take it slow, little steps and you'll get there. If your DH is on board then tell him how you feel and get him doing what you're comfortable with.
I have a friend who had 4th degree tears and needed surgery after her first 2 years ago. She's now pregnant and aiming for a vb if it's possible. A cs is not the worst thing in the world nor is it a given just because you had a bad tear.
Posted 13 March 2016 - 09:55 PM
I had a severe third almost verging on fourth degree tear wth my first - to the point they brought round student doctors and asked if they could show them.
I took almost 7months to feel normal. I was told it looked okay but I was very dry and started taking oestrogen cream around month four post birth, do speak to your GP and this may be something that could possibly help. I then made up for lost time DTD and was pregnant by the time he was 10mo. Lol.
I had to do that after my other births also as the old wound would be dry but I had my other three naturally with no further tearing just so you know it's possible (small grazes only)
Keep up the kegel/pelvic floor exercises that is the most important thing you can do and as I said above go to your GP let them know what you put above and they can help.
Posted 13 March 2016 - 10:05 PM
I had my daughter last March and had a third degree tear and episiotomy.
Now I feel pretty good, and really I have done since around 6 months post partum.
The first few times I DTD with DH I really didn't enjoy it but treated it like a learning experience. Lots of lubricant and going very slowly helped. And we probably did it no more than once a month between June and August. I'm not sure if after that I had healed a bit more or I was just used to the way it felt now, but for me 12 months on I don't feel any different than before baby.
I just had my second post partum gyno check and have been told I will need a c - sec next time, but that's because I have a slight ongoing issue with my sphincter (basically I still can't hold a fart in, and only fart when I NEED to poo). At my first check up four months post birth I was told there was a good chance I'd be able to have another VB so it's definitely not a given.
I take Fybogel occasionally if I feel I'm not regular as I but again, I wasn't told I'd have to take it for the rest of my life. I just prefer to stay on top of it and regular to avoid any unnecessary straining.
I saw a physio specialising in woman's health a few times which also helped with appropriate pelvic floor exercises
Edited by Cheesetoastie, 13 March 2016 - 10:07 PM.
Posted 13 March 2016 - 11:15 PM
I hear you. I went to a pre-birth physio class where we were told hardly anyone gets 3rd or 4th degree tears.
I ended up with a 3b after a very fast labour, water birth in a birth centre. She had her hand to her head. I felt like I had been hit by a truck. I saw a physio for about a year. It took a good 10ish months before it all started to feel back to normal. It got a whole lot better when I stopping breastfeeding at 12 months.
I went through a birth centre again for my second pregnancy, but also saw an obstetrician to talk through whether or not to have a cesarian. His advice was that he would support either choice, especially as I didn't have faecal incontinence. We talked through what could go wrong with cesarians and vaginal births. In the end I decided to go with vaginal birth.
My midwife told me that the best position to avoid tearing is on your side, and that's what I did. She also used a hot compress on my perineum. Oh and I used an epi no for about a week before. It was an even faster labour, and I was so surprised and relieved to hear that I had not torn at all. My recovery was so much better and faster, though I think thanks to scar tissue and breastfeeding it still took a while for everything to get back to normal.
I still have all bran every morning.
Edited by alittlehoarse, 13 March 2016 - 11:17 PM.
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