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What our parenting generation does well


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#101 Mollycoddle

Posted 16 March 2016 - 01:46 PM

View Postcinnabubble, on 15 March 2016 - 09:08 PM, said:

I was fed on watered down cows' milk with extra lactose added. It was 1969. It was definitely a completely suboptimal food for babies.

Agreed, I think the PP was actually talking about Carnation milk - which pretty much a whole generation was raised on probably from the 60's through to the mid-80's.

#102 Kylie Orr

Posted 16 March 2016 - 02:14 PM

Hi All,

Wow! Such enthusiastic debate! I can say after writing for EB for almost  decade, I did not pick this as a topic that would generate such passionate discussion.

To clarify a couple of things: I am 40. I was aiming this topic at parents of kids that fall in the age range of 0-5 - EB's main demographic, although I recognise there is a range of ages of parents and grandparents who all participate in the vibrant forums here.

My goal was not so much to compare generations in a "we do it better" tone, but in more a "hey, we are not all bad".

I really feel like we get the bad parenting label constantly, from a highly-read, super-critical, over-analysed time when every decision we make is critiqued for the long term impact it will have on our kids. My parents certainly didn't experience such scrutiny, or perhaps they took less notice?

Anyway, love that it spurred discussion, hopefully we don't turn nasty so the moderators have to shut it down. It was always intentioned to be an uplifting piece, not a time to swing the scorn sword around.

Thanks for reading and commenting. If there's anything you'd like to add that you think we do well as parents in the here and now, or if you are older and recognise something parents of young children are great at please add it to the comments here!

Kylie.

#103 Soontobegran

Posted 16 March 2016 - 03:53 PM

View PostMollycoddle, on 16 March 2016 - 01:46 PM, said:

Agreed, I think the PP was actually talking about Carnation milk - which pretty much a whole generation was raised on probably from the 60's through to the mid-80's.


Where was this ? Carnation Milk was used in the 60s along with boiled cow's milk formula but from my experience from the mid 70s and 80s non breast fed babies were almost exclusively fed with powdered formula.

#104 Acidulous Osprey

Posted 16 March 2016 - 04:11 PM

I worked as a nanny in the 80's and formula was standard.

#105 katpaws

Posted 16 March 2016 - 04:31 PM

In regards to my helicopter parent comment, it was meant tongue in cheek, as i don't really think i am but my daughter would say i am over protective. And i was not implying those with more than one kids had extras to lose or having more kids if you lost one would make it not so bad. I almost lost my daughter when she was born and i can't have anymore, so my comment was probably not well worded; i just meant that i probably am over protective as i almost lost her once, i could  not face that again. Sorry if i offended people, it was not my intention. I think most people familiar with me on EB would know that i would never purposely upset people about the loss of a child.

Edited by katpaws, 16 March 2016 - 04:59 PM.


#106 purplekitty

Posted 16 March 2016 - 04:32 PM

View PostSoontobegran, on 16 March 2016 - 03:53 PM, said:

Where was this ? Carnation Milk was used in the 60s along with boiled cow's milk formula but from my experience from the mid 70s and 80s non breast fed babies were almost exclusively fed with powdered formula.
I was hoping you would see this, STBG.

This is my memory as well.

#107 somila

Posted 16 March 2016 - 04:41 PM

I was weaned onto powered full cream milk in the early 70s, but at four months old, I was probably considered too old for formula?
Or perhaps it wasn't readily available in the far-flung small town I lived in.  FWIW I got very fat very fast and stayed that way for a long time, despite a conscientious mother and no fast food in sight.

OP, I can't speak for current parents of 0-5 year olds as my children are long past this age.

Apart from the decline of physical punishment (which has been challenged as a useful parenting technique for a long time now) and the advent of mobile technology (which can be positive or negative depending on how it's used) I can't really see that there is much difference in parenting in general from when my teens were small.

#108 katpaws

Posted 16 March 2016 - 04:58 PM

Dr Spock was a big influence on parents in the 1970s.

#109 The Old Feral

Posted 16 March 2016 - 05:28 PM

My mum rang while I was reading this thread so I was able to confirm that the watered down cow's milk I survived on from around 4mo until solids wasn't boiled. This was 1972.

In fact I don't recall being fed much nutritious food at all growing up, it was a veggie free existence apart from frozen peas and corn, no fish, very little fresh fruit, packaged and processed everything.

My parents both grew up in post war poverty and I think that convenience food was aspirational for them - a middle class luxury.

#110 HRH Countrymel

Posted 16 March 2016 - 05:30 PM

View PostSoontobegran, on 16 March 2016 - 03:53 PM, said:

Where was this ? Carnation Milk was used in the 60s along with boiled cow's milk formula but from my experience from the mid 70s and 80s non breast fed babies were almost exclusively fed with powdered formula.

In my clinic book from '71 they have written the proportion of carnation milk to water to put in the prescribed and timed number of bottles!

There are also surprised notes at the continued weight gain et. al. each visit as "Child is STILL being breast fed.."

#111 Soontobegran

Posted 17 March 2016 - 08:11 AM

View PostHRH Countrymel, on 16 March 2016 - 05:30 PM, said:

In my clinic book from '71 they have written the proportion of carnation milk to water to put in the prescribed and timed number of bottles!

There are also surprised notes at the continued weight gain et. al. each visit as "Child is STILL being breast fed.."

My dear mum kept our clinic books too. Mine has a cow's milk recipe in it on the first page.....despite the fact mum breast fed until we drank from a cup. It has a recommendation for pentavite too....mum ignored this.
It also has a recipe for boiling brains and making bone broth ( to eat not as a milk substitute ) :)

#112 Natttmumm

Posted 17 March 2016 - 08:21 AM

I thought we were doing ok until I read the article suggesting that Gen Y (im gen X) is happy to go back to staying at home and more traditional roles as they didn't like growing up with working Mum's.

This has stuck with me as I have 3 kids and work part - time. The kids often ask me to come to a school excursion or reading groups and I have to say no due to work. Hope im not scarring them.

My mum was home fulltime

#113 Sunshine streaming

Posted 17 March 2016 - 09:08 AM

I think that as parents we all make choices that we hope are int he best interests of our children. Some of those choices are based on a reaction to our own experiences as a child and we hope to rectify that in the next generation. Sometimes we get it right and sometimes we swing too far the other way. But we as parents are not the sole factor determining the outcome of our children. Schools, our culture, the media, friends, life experiences all play a big role too.

#114 Nobodyelse

Posted 17 March 2016 - 09:19 AM

View PostSoontobegran, on 16 March 2016 - 03:53 PM, said:

Where was this ? Carnation Milk was used in the 60s along with boiled cow's milk formula but from my experience from the mid 70s and 80s non breast fed babies were almost exclusively fed with powdered formula.

I was 1978 baby with a lactose intolerance. I was on formula by script sent directly from Canberra.

Edited by Hmmhuhwhat, 17 March 2016 - 09:19 AM.


#115 Mister Mum

Posted 17 March 2016 - 09:27 AM

View Postkatpaws, on 16 March 2016 - 04:31 PM, said:

In regards to my helicopter parent comment, it was meant tongue in cheek, as i don't really think i am but my daughter would say i am over protective. And i was not implying those with more than one kids had extras to lose or having more kids if you lost one would make it not so bad. I almost lost my daughter when she was born and i can't have anymore, so my comment was probably not well worded; i just meant that i probably am over protective as i almost lost her once, i could  not face that again. Sorry if i offended people, it was not my intention. I think most people familiar with me on EB would know that i would never purposely upset people about the loss of a child.

I don't see the need to apologise, I think anyone taking offence at that was looking for something to get upset about.  There is a quite of bit of if you say A, then you must mean you hate B around here.

#116 Nobodyelse

Posted 17 March 2016 - 09:29 AM

View PostAshildr, on 15 March 2016 - 06:33 PM, said:

Wow. Only one so you don't want to lose her? So five of my six babies are just spares that I can afford to lose?

Actually, that's exactly why my Mum went back for number three (and a planned but never actualised #4). Not as a 'spare' for her but that if anything were to happen to one of us, the other child wouldn't be left alone.

#117 Nobodyelse

Posted 17 March 2016 - 09:39 AM

View PostSoontobegran, on 16 March 2016 - 09:40 AM, said:

But that is not 70s parenting.
It is the parenting of 'some' parents in every generation.

I went to school in the 60s, my first day at school I wet my pants and was made to sit on a mat in the corner with a dunce's hat on. When I told my parents their reaction to that was exactly what mine would have been if it had been done to one of my children and this never happened again..to any child.

I am very sorry that this was your personal experience though. :(

Exactly! My father was canned in 1956 by his first teacher. The next day my grandmother marched down to the school and told the nun that if she laid a hand on my father again, she'd take her by the habit and wipe the floor with it.

#118 seayork2002

Posted 17 March 2016 - 09:53 AM

Using the wetting pants scenario - there is no way I beleive a child should be in that situation where they are too scared to say they need the toilet - if they have to go they have to go but it would be mayem if every child had to to the toilet block with a buddy at all random times throughout the day

BUT

these days it would not surprise me that a parent raced to the school at had a go at the teacher because

'X is allowed to go when they want because if not it is against their human rights and I will take it to the High Court if I have to'

I am glad my child is taught that if he needs to go then recess and lunchtime (or whenever the teachers send them) and not interrupt the class unless he absolutely has to (well for all kids)

#119 Nobodyelse

Posted 17 March 2016 - 10:00 AM

View Postseayork2002, on 17 March 2016 - 09:53 AM, said:

Using the wetting pants scenario - there is no way I beleive a child should be in that situation where they are too scared to say they need the toilet - if they have to go they have to go but it would be mayem if every child had to to the toilet block with a buddy at all random times throughout the day

BUT

these days it would not surprise me that a parent raced to the school at had a go at the teacher because

'X is allowed to go when they want because if not it is against their human rights and I will take it to the High Court if I have to'

I am glad my child is taught that if he needs to go then recess and lunchtime (or whenever the teachers send them) and not interrupt the class unless he absolutely has to (well for all kids)

http://www.heraldsun...c4d8f9e06fc130f

#120 Ellie bean

Posted 17 March 2016 - 10:18 AM

View PostHmmhuhwhat, on 17 March 2016 - 09:19 AM, said:



I was 1978 baby with a lactose intolerance. I was on formula by script sent directly from Canberra.
Wow I had no idea it was available back then, that's amazing!

#121 ItsTheSimpleThings

Posted 17 March 2016 - 10:23 AM

Yep, I think that overall we are doing a pretty good job. I'm doing the best that I can do to love, nurture, teach and care for my three children. I have crap days, they have crap days, but overall, I think we're doing well. I'm certainly not saying I am doing a better job than my mum did, but I'm sure that I'm not doing a worse job either.

#122 Nobodyelse

Posted 17 March 2016 - 01:30 PM

View PostEllie bean, on 17 March 2016 - 10:18 AM, said:

Wow I had no idea it was available back then, that's amazing!

It wasn't easy to get. There were hoops of fire involved especially getting the diagnosis and script in the first place. It nearly drove my parents to the brink with my constant painful crying. If memory serves, I think it was imported. Then the running out before a new tin arrived from Canberra was a constant worry. I was on it until kinder. So years. I remember the tin being placed on the shelf to be prepared for me instead of milk at morning tea.

#123 RynandStompy

Posted 17 March 2016 - 08:18 PM

View PostIlliterati, on 16 March 2016 - 08:16 AM, said:



What does a 5yr old need to take to school to make their bags too heavy to carry?

Even in grade six my kids just had to take their lunch, snack and hat to school. A drink bottle too if they remembered - but they preferred to drink out of the bubblers mostly. Lunch was just a sandwich, snack a piece of fruit.
The mandatory school uniform backpack at DD's school is very heavy on it's own. Only 1 size is available, so it's designed to meet the textbook and sports gear needs of older students more than little preppies IMO. I will continue to help carry DD'S bag when she's tired and it's heavy. I had a back injury as a child and wouldn't wish juvenile back issues on any child.

#124 Horangi

Posted 18 March 2016 - 09:21 AM

View Postdad2two_, on 15 March 2016 - 03:52 PM, said:

Sorry I disagree. Perhaps there are some things we as parents are doing well, but they are all totally  negated by the fact we have taken the childhood obesity levels in Australia from one of the lowest in the world to one of the highest. It's so high, it is now referred to as an epidemic. So no, I don't think we are deserving of a pat on the back. We need a slap across the head.
But is this really something to do with parenting in particular? I think most kids just eat what their parents eat on the whole. People of every age in Australia have gotten fatter and now this generation of kids is the first to grow up in an age of obesity (which I hope will pass soon). It seems to me that most people are more conscientious about their kids' diets than their own.




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