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Will you find out?

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#1 jayz~mel

Posted 17 March 2017 - 10:54 AM

Hi ladies,

Just some random questions...

What do you already have? Do you hope for a specific gender? (Yes we all want a healthy baby, but our heart is allowed to want something in particular) And will you be finding out what you're having?

We have 3 boys. I'd really love a girl, but guessing it'll be another boy. Undecided as to if I'm going to find out. DP likes the surprise and I like knowing, so we can never choose. DS1 & DS3 were both surprises, but I found out with DS2, so technically it's my turn again :lol:

Edited by jayz~mel, 17 March 2017 - 10:55 AM.

#2 150watson

Posted 17 March 2017 - 01:46 PM

View Postjayz~mel, on 17 March 2017 - 10:54 AM, said:

Hi ladies,

Just some random questions...

What do you already have? Do you hope for a specific gender? (Yes we all want a healthy baby, but our heart is allowed to want something in particular) And will you be finding out what you're having?

We have 3 boys. I'd really love a girl, but guessing it'll be another boy. Undecided as to if I'm going to find out. DP likes the surprise and I like knowing, so we can never choose. DS1 & DS3 were both surprises, but I found out with DS2, so technically it's my turn again :lol:

Hi There Jayz-Mel!

This is my first after trying for over 2years with no luck. So although early days, super excited. As you said, yes we all will be happy with a healthy baby. For me I would love a Boy! And we will be finding out as soon as we can! :)

I am desperate to buy things already! So the sooner I know, the sooner I can go crazy in the shops! :)

#3 e_vonny

Posted 17 March 2017 - 01:49 PM

I have a boy and I don't mind what the second is :)
I am DEFINITELY finding out. Hubby and I want to know ALL THE THINGS. We're even considering the NIPT to find out sex earlier (because I don't think we really need the NIPT for the Downs etc parts of the test).

Funny story is that MIL went to a fortune teller before DS was born. The fortune teller said her son would have two boys. So far the first is a boy so she's right on that count. Then last month MIL had a dream I'd be pregnant this month and it would be a boy. I was already pregnant when she told me this dream but I wasn't ready to tell yet (hadn't been to GP). It'll be interesting if this one is a boy too. I'm a major skeptic so I don't believe in dreams and fortunes ;)

I am happy with a boy but I would be also happy with a girl. I really don't have a preference but boy names are bloody hard. I have a way better list of girl names. Hubby and I pretty much only agreed on one name last time and that's what we named our son.

#4 ljp89

Posted 17 March 2017 - 02:12 PM

We will be finding out, fiancé and I both agreed on that.

He's sure it's a girl. I had a dream last night that it was a girl, but I think it will be a boy - just a gut feeling.

My great grandmother passed a few years back and I wish she hadve been around for my first pregnancy - she correctly told every single woman in our family what gender they would be having when they were pregnant for as long as any of us can remember. To the point where at the end when she was in hospital, she told me that my aunt would be having a girl. We didn't know my aunt was pregnant. Unfortunately my great grandmother passed before my aunt's baby was born, but yep, a little girl - who is the spitting image of our great grandmother.

I don't think I believe in psychics or dreams to be accurate but my great grandmother never got it wrong - she had 6 children, all of whom had 4 or more children of their own, and all of the great grandchildren as well and a 100% success rate.

Hopefully someone else has inherited that gift!

#5 Jax12

Posted 17 March 2017 - 06:03 PM

Wow ljp89, that's quite a talent!

I have two boys and am so desperate for a girl it hurts.  This pg wasn't actually planned, and a 3rd child is going to challenge us in so many ways financially and logistically, but if it were a girl I would feel a lot less panicked than I currently do.

I really don't mean to sound ungrateful - I love my boys and will love this baby regardless of its genitalia, but when we find out it's a boy (I'm convinced it will be) I will definitely grieve never having a daughter.  

I know that there are so many more heartbreaking things to grieve.  But while knowing this on a cognitive level I have difficulty getting my emotions in check around this issue.

#6 jayz~mel

Posted 17 March 2017 - 09:21 PM

150watson - I hope you get your boy. I'm usually the same with wanting to buy things. The funny thing for me is that I literally sold my 2 baby carriers, most of our stash of boys clothes and all of my MCN's, just days before getting my BFP :rofl:

e_vonny - A few people in my last DIG had that test done. I was a bit jealous of them knowing so soon, but I wasn't forking out $400+ just for a gender reveal :lol:

ljp89 - What a fabulous talent for your great-grandmother to have!! I always dream the opposite. I dreamt all 3 of mine were girls and they all came out with exterior plumbing ;)

Jax12 - Don't feel bad or ungrateful hun. I am EXACTLY the same!! I cried when I found out DS2 was a boy and when DS3 had his birthday the other weekend, I cried because I thought he was our last and I'd never get my girl (I got my :BFP: the next day :lol: ). There's no saying this one will be a girl, but I can hope. I know I will bawl my eyes out, if they tell me this one is another boy. Doesn't mean I'll love him any less, it'll just be me grieving the daughter I never got. I completely understand the money side of things too. We will have to get a 7 seater car, which we really cannot afford :no2:

Edited by jayz~mel, 17 March 2017 - 09:23 PM.

#7 Sally1983

Posted 17 March 2017 - 11:27 PM

We have a little boy. We found out but only told our family (parents, siblings, partners).
Dunno what we'll do this time. I imagine I'll get to the anatomy scan and want to know!
I think it will be another boy and that's cool with me :)

#8 jayz~mel

Posted 18 March 2017 - 09:19 AM

Sally - Being a Mum of boys is pretty great. Not sure about being  Mum of 4 boys though. That scares me :omg:  haha.

#9 yellybelly

Posted 18 March 2017 - 08:33 PM

I hope to (if we get that far 😬). I haven't even discussed that yet with DH as we haven't seen the heart beat yet. Im certainly keen but DH wasn't with #1 but we did find out in the end as I had a third scan as I was borderline gestational diabetes and I wore him down but we didn't tell anyone!
I totally understand about having a girl, even though we did have a girl - would be happy for another girl to perhaps get some use out of all the clothes that were hardly ever or never worn, lol.

#10 LollyLou2

Posted 18 March 2017 - 09:04 PM

Definitely finding out! My friend told me about the Harmony testing yesterday (just coincidencentally, so I had to try hard to not be too interested, then googled itstraight away at home!)
We have two girls, and I really don't care what #3 is, but my partner will.

#11 Animal Lover

Posted 19 March 2017 - 04:50 PM

Yes, we will be finding out too!
I don't like surprises!

Me doing IVF and having our embryo tested for the right number of chromosomes before transfer may mean that there's a piece of paper somewhere that already has what sex our embryo is!

I'll have to ask the specialist when I see her next week. But I might wait for the answer a bit further along the pregnancy.

#12 Wanting#3

Posted 19 March 2017 - 05:51 PM

Yep we will find out, kudos to those who like a surprise but I'm too impatient lol

We have 2 boys so would love a little girl, but I do love my boys so really I'd be happy with either :-)

Edited by Wanting#3, 19 March 2017 - 05:51 PM.

#13 jayz~mel

Posted 19 March 2017 - 06:41 PM

I'm impatient too and not finding out with DS1 and DS3 drove me insane!! :lol:

#14 MumOfFun

Posted 20 March 2017 - 12:34 PM

Haha looks like I'm the only one who doesn't want to find out. I love surprises. I don't like to be too organised. I figure you get to find out so much why not keep the sex a surprise. I hate it when friends find out. One even went on to tell everyone his name. I was like common at least keep the name a secret don't leave the only thing we don't know be the weight of the child. So no I won't be finding out. And honestly at the moment I'm not particularly wanting a particular sex. I did call bubs a her the other day. But I can't say I really want a girl or really want a boy. Might be different if I already had a child but being this is my first I'm just happy to have a baby.

#15 e_vonny

Posted 20 March 2017 - 03:01 PM

jayz-mel - I'm baulking at the cost too. I mean we can definitely "afford" it but is it really worth ~$400 to know sex a month or two early? Hmm....It's definitely a "luxury". Hubby is all for it though.

ljp - that's a pretty cool story about your great grandmother!

jax and jayz-mel - Society can be cruel to mums who have gender disappointment but hey, sometimes you can't control how you feel!

Regarding having a boy or girl in general, I think I'm so indecisive that I'm glad that it's not something I have to make a decision on :D I don't feel like I need the pigeon pair either despite this seemingly to be like the highest order of achievement of motherhood ;)

#16 fritzkitz

Posted 20 March 2017 - 04:06 PM

This is our first and we want a surprise. I don't really mind either way but if I'm honest I feel like I could connect with a girl easier -is that weird?

#17 e_vonny

Posted 20 March 2017 - 04:10 PM

fritzkitz - I think that's pretty normal. I've heard mums say that before. I'm not a "girly girl" so I think it would be harder with a girl but in saying that, it'll be a girl with my genes so she will likely not be that girly either.

#18 MumOfFun

Posted 20 March 2017 - 05:23 PM

Fritzkitz you and I can be in the surprise club together. I'm not fussed either way either. Definitely have ideas on what I would do with both sexes.

#19 Jax12

Posted 20 March 2017 - 05:47 PM

I think part of the reason I've always found out is because I do have a preference.  If it was my first and I was cruisey either way I could definitely see why you'd want the surprise.  For me I need that time to adjust because I wouldn't forgive myself for feeling disappointed the day my baby was born.

I figure it's a really personal decision - as strongly as I want to find out others feel the opposite.  What I don't understand is when others get annoyed when people don't share their same view, as if the other person is 'wrong'.  My aunty gets really angry if people tell her the sex of their baby before it's born and god forbid they share the name!!  I sort of think, uh, it's not your baby dude, chill out.  It's not about you the day he/she is born!  I'm all for surprises but at the end of the day a baby is pretty special, regardless of whether you knew what flavour it was before it was born!! :p She went as far to tell me that mothers who find out have a higher rate of gender disappointment.  I didn't bother arguing but I was thinking in my head, correlation doesn't equal causation.  I would wager that women who have a preference are more likely to suffer gender disappointment, and that these women are are more likely to find out to find out the sex of their baby for these reasons!

For those, who like me, has their heart yearning for a particular sex, I sincerely hope you get that wish fulfilled.  I have accepted that I will be the mother of three boys, and I will love their guts!  But part of me will always miss the daughter I'll never have.  Will let you all know if I get proved wrong!  :) You'll hear me squealing from the pink aisle :p

#20 MumOfFun

Posted 20 March 2017 - 06:02 PM

I totally get that people want to find out and that people want to share that knowledge. I wouldn't get angry with anyone for making that choice. But I must admit if a friend is pregnant and finds out I do tell them that I don't want to know what they are having. I have found some keep it to themselves while others like to share. Each to their own I guess. You do what makes you happy. I do sincerely hope that you get your girl this time. Fingers crossed for you. And I hope I'm not sounding like I'm debating with you. I'm not. I like surprises and always have that's why I'm choosing not to find out.
And for those who one partner finds out and the other doesn't I honestly don't know how you can keep a secret that big is be like oh he just kicked me and accidentally let it out. Those people are tough. Lol.

#21 MumOfFun

Posted 20 March 2017 - 06:04 PM

Pink vibes your way jax12 😘

#22 Jax12

Posted 21 March 2017 - 01:00 PM

I had only kinda of skimmed the thread - I hope my post didn't sound like it was pointed at you.  My aunty goes mental, like full on tanty anger!!  She's odd....and always right  :rolleyes:

Thanks for your pink vibes :love:

#23 Mousey77

Posted 07 May 2017 - 05:56 PM

I totally understand about wanting a particular gender! My first two pregnancies I was absolutely FIXATED on having two girls... I always envied kids at school that had a big sister (I was stuck with a horrible brother 6 years older than me who was bloody awful to me most of the time!) All I wanted was a sister....

So when I decided on children I was fixated on two girls close in age together and 'best friends' My husband jokes to everyone that if one was a boy, my sheer 'force of will and wanting' would have made it turn into a girl hahahahaha! ....
Anyway I got my two perfect girls, less than 2 years a part in age :) was the happiest day when I found out the second was a girl. It was literally my dream come true. They are now 6 and 8 and THE BEST of friends. I find such joy watching them play and be there for each other (right now they are snuggled on the couch with pillows under the same blanket making bracelets together)- melts my heart that we were able to give them each other.
I love dressing them up, beautiful dresses, long hair... they guide this now they are older, but they are literally the 'girlies' of girls (just like I was ... suppose I still am super girly lol)
I found out as soon as I could with each pregnancy, I wanted to be prepared and get used to the idea one of them happened to be a boy.... didn't happen though, but I'm still glad I found out.

Now I am 10 weeks pregnant with number 3, and I honestly don't feel that strongly about what I want?! I just want a healthy baby. Another girl would be lovely as could be, because I enjoy raising girls so much and wouldn't mind having a horde of them! A boy would also be fine too, as it would probably even out the family dynamic (outnumbered Daddy hahahaha!) and give the girls a brother to 'mother'... I honestly don't care this time around, which is so strange for me because I was so fixated the first two babies... it feels weird to be 'relaxed' about this one.
I'm 100% finding out as soon as I can though, having the Harmony test next week and have ticked the 'gender' box as I still want to know even though I have no real preference!

#24 arayofsunshine

Posted 08 May 2017 - 09:09 AM

We have a girl for our first, and this one I found out on Thursday is a girl too yay! :yes:

#25 Jax12

Posted 09 May 2017 - 12:09 PM

Haha Mousey, your experience is like the opposite to mine!  I cried when I found out DS1 was a boy.  Surprisingly, I was less gutted when I found out DS2 was a boy...maybe because baby boys weren't the big unknown to me they were the first time round?  Anyway, the Generation test has come back indicating this baby is a girl...but I'm hanging out for a visual confirmation on that!!

Congrats arayofsunshine! :)

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