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Clingy baby, childcare or in home care?

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#1 MrsG2

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:03 PM

I’m due to return to work in March next year. DS will be 10.5months. He’s extremely clingy and doesn’t go to anyone besides dh and I. He doesn’t even like staying at his grandparents for extended periods of time.
Financially, I need to return to work full time. I am lucky though that I can work from home. However I know that I can’t do my work and look after DS. He will have to be in childcare or have a babysitter in Home.

I was hoping to hear some experiences of how clingy children have coped with childcare? I am trying to decide whether I should bite the bullet and put him in child care cold turkey or whether I should have a babysitter come during my work hours (most likely more expensive) but have one-on one care for DS at home. He can go to childcare when he’s older and able to understand better ?

Sorry if this sounds like ramble..

#2 Jingleflea

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:06 PM

I think in home care while you're home will be confusing for him.
What about family day care in a registered FDC house?

#3 Fossy

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:23 PM

I’ve found it much harder to put kids in daycare when they’re older. My kids that started at 9 and 10 months had no issues, 18/20 months were nightmares as they had more of an understanding that they were being left.

I’d start him in daycare, if it goes horribly pear shaped you’ll be able to find a nanny pretty easily.  Finding daycare would be much harder if you tried it the other way round.

#4 walkingFish

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:27 PM

My DS was a very clingy baby, still is a fairly clingy toddler.

He started childcare at the same age as you are planning in a small centre. It did take him a little while to adjust, and the first week he was held or in a pram or swing unless he was asleep, but he got used to it. He bonded well with his primary carer and over time extended that to other educators in his room.

After a few months he was noticeabley more outgoing and able to deal with new people (for him - he didn’t change personality or anything). We reflected at the time it had been a good decision for us.

He is now 2.5 and LOVES going to care,  very secure there and it’s been a very positive experience for us.

As PP said, I think that care in your home while you are there would be confusing for him and I’d try to avoid it.
If you’re not comfortable with any of the centres in your area, perhaps investigate FDC. I have a friend with a clingy girl who has fond a fabulous carer for them in that system.

Edited by walkingFish, 28 December 2017 - 08:29 PM.

#5 born.a.girl

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:34 PM

I worked from a home base (at home about half the time at that stage) and I wouldn't have been able to handle hearing her unsettled and trying to work.  Might be different for you.

#6 Fennel Salad

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:50 PM

I wouldn't stress too much putting a 10.5 month baby in a high quality LDC.  DS2 was my human limpet and he went in at 11 months and after an initial settling down period, he was fine. High quality, engaged staff is the key.

DS2 is still clingy, and probably will always have that personality .. but he survived and thrived at LDC and pre-school.

Hope it helps.

#7 Franny and Zooey

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:50 PM

FDC worked for us.  We are still friends with our FDC lady years on.

Less germs and bugs to pick up as well.

#8 Hini

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:51 PM

My dd is 2.5 and very clingy. I can't leave the room without her crying.

I do work full time and have since she was born. She started day care 1 day at 6 months and went to 3 days at 1. She is queen bee of the playground at daycare. Has carers and kids alike wrapped around her little finger. So confident and delightful.

But sill my clingy koala baby who begs to go in the ergo and 'to get back in mummy's tummy'.

Daycare has been wonderful for her (and her big brother). And she's still clingy at home. It's not an either or in my experimence.

#9 MrsG2

Posted 28 December 2017 - 08:58 PM

It’s so good to hear that babies thrive in cc despita rough start...I hope my DS manages it...

#10 sarahec

Posted 29 December 2017 - 09:06 AM

My son went at around 14 months. They find carers they like and cling to them :)

#11 Lallalla

Posted 29 December 2017 - 11:19 AM

My oldest is a shy little person, she started daycare before she was 1 and was ok. It is a smaller but not tiny centre (64 kids total including 16 under 2s) where all the carers including management know all the kids. It really helped that she had the same primary carer for the first 2 1/2 years she was there. But on the flip side she then found the move to the preschool room hard.  you could start a couple of days a week and build up to full time.

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