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Vent to avoid Facebook argument with stranger


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#1 Lallalla

Posted 12 June 2018 - 05:12 PM

On my local multi-club’s Facebook page there is a discussion going on about how hard it is to get out and about with 2-2.5 year old multiples who won’t sit in a pram/tantrum if you put a backpack on them etc. The original poster has been joined by a deluge of people saying mine are/were the same etc etc.

Then a delightful lady pops up and goes on about how it’s how we are all parenting them that is the problem. She apparently knows because she’s been a nanny for 20 years and she didn’t have twins but she had two kids two years apart...

Driving me f*{%ing balmy. Everyone who has kids knows they behave better for other people. And no having 2 kids 2 years apart is NOT the same as twins. I have a singleton less than 2 years older than my twins but I do not purport to know what raising triplets is like. It’s different, it just is.

I know sometimes in conversation people are just trying to relate but a) she doesn’t have multiples so what’s she doing on the fb page? b)there was no need to join in the conversation c) not a helfpful comment at all.

Sigh.

#2 Riotproof

Posted 12 June 2018 - 05:14 PM

Sigh.

#3 Learningtosayno7

Posted 12 June 2018 - 05:35 PM

I know how you feel and to those that say having them close together is just like twins, I can tell you it is nothing like having twins.  My eldest two are only 15 months apart and then the twins came along when the youngest was 4.  

I repeat having them close together is NOTHING like having twins.

Vent away

Oh and a PSA do not have twins when it is the kinder year just saying.

#4 Nobodyelse

Posted 12 June 2018 - 05:38 PM

Not sure why your avoiding it. That's an argument I'd willing have with any stranger. Especially one so flipping stupid.

#5 IamtheMumma

Posted 12 June 2018 - 05:40 PM

Perhaps report her to group admin as not being meeting the twin mum criteria. But yes I've heard the same. I just smile and nod as they believe what they say but they have no idea.

#6 Black Velvet

Posted 12 June 2018 - 05:44 PM

View PostLallalla, on 12 June 2018 - 05:12 PM, said:


Then a delightful lady pops up and goes on about how it’s how we are all parenting them that is the problem. She apparently knows because she’s been a nanny for 20 years and she didn’t have twins but she had two kids two years apart...



:rofl:

#7 archyandmehitabel

Posted 12 June 2018 - 06:13 PM

My kids were born 2-ish years apart and they were always hell to get out.  Running away in supermarkets, fighting each other...

Singletons, kids years apart or multiples, any nanny who pulls the 'poor parenting' card can go and get stuffed.

As for multiples, I don;t know how any parent copes with the demands.

#8 Starletta

Posted 12 June 2018 - 06:18 PM

Have the argument. She needs to be knocked down a peg or two.

#9 Lallalla

Posted 12 June 2018 - 06:26 PM

View Postarchyandmehitabel, on 12 June 2018 - 06:13 PM, said:

My kids were born 2-ish years apart and they were always hell to get out.  Running away in supermarkets, fighting each other...

Singletons, kids years apart or multiples, any nanny who pulls the 'poor parenting' card can go and get stuffed.

As for multiples, I don;t know how any parent copes with the demands.

Good point, any parent too. Just because your kids responds to something doesn’t mean mine will. Frankly just because 1 of my kids responds to something doesn’t mean the other will.

#10 Jingleflea

Posted 12 June 2018 - 06:30 PM

Yeah, I'd argue that stupid.

#11 teaspoon

Posted 12 June 2018 - 06:39 PM

Valid vent.

I had a woman in a park once tell me how to raise my spirited boy who had energy to burn.  Closer questioning revealed she had never had children but apparently raising a male puppy was exactly the same.

#12 MrsPuddleduck

Posted 12 June 2018 - 06:55 PM

View PostLallalla, on 12 June 2018 - 05:12 PM, said:

On my local multi-club’s Facebook page there is a discussion going on about how hard it is to get out and about with 2-2.5 year old multiples who won’t sit in a pram/tantrum if you put a backpack on them etc. The original poster has been joined by a deluge of people saying mine are/were the same etc etc.

Then a delightful lady pops up and goes on about how it’s how we are all parenting them that is the problem. She apparently knows because she’s been a nanny for 20 years and she didn’t have twins but she had two kids two years apart...

Driving me f*{%ing balmy. Everyone who has kids knows they behave better for other people. And no having 2 kids 2 years apart is NOT the same as twins. I have a singleton less than 2 years older than my twins but I do not purport to know what raising triplets is like. It’s different, it just is.

I know sometimes in conversation people are just trying to relate but a) she doesn’t have multiples so what’s she doing on the fb page? b)there was no need to join in the conversation c) not a helfpful comment at all.

Sigh.

Just reply “lol”.

#13 newmumandexcited

Posted 12 June 2018 - 07:00 PM

There’s a whole meme about it - it’s amazing how often you get told that it’s the same as twins.

UM, IT’S NOTHING LIKE HAVING TWO PEOPLE AT THE SAME DEVELOPMENTAL STAGE. Even my sister says it to me.

#14 TheWanderer

Posted 12 June 2018 - 07:05 PM

What's wrong with arguing with strangers online?  Without that the interwebs would be mainly cat videos and pr0n.  

Posted Image

#15 Mrs Lost Wanderer

Posted 12 June 2018 - 07:24 PM

Same same but different story. A few months ago, I was still pregnant and went shopping with 2 year old DS. I had an old lady at the supermarket tell me that she knows how hard life is  with 2 kids because her sister had 2 kids and she struggled.

Ummm... No. And by the way, this is my fifth.

#16 FuzzyChocolateToes

Posted 12 June 2018 - 08:06 PM

View Postteaspoon, on 12 June 2018 - 06:39 PM, said:

Valid vent.

I had a woman in a park once tell me how to raise my spirited boy who had energy to burn.  Closer questioning revealed she had never had children but apparently raising a male puppy was exactly the same.
Lol. A colleague of mine,  parent of two teens, always said that raising boys was like owning a dog- you needed to get them out for a run twice a day.

#17 No Drama Please

Posted 12 June 2018 - 08:10 PM

Do you think she could be advertising her services? So fancies herself as a Super Nanny and trying to spam Facebook with her personal awesomeness kind of thing?

#18 Sancti-claws

Posted 12 June 2018 - 08:29 PM

Oh I feel your pain, OP.  I had kids 10 years apart and it really is how you parent them...

(ducks and races out the door)

#19 Just Jack

Posted 12 June 2018 - 08:46 PM

Troll?

#20 ~LemonMyrtle~

Posted 12 June 2018 - 08:47 PM

I don’t have twins, but I had two kids 14 months apart. People tell me all the time it must be like having twins.  And they’re totally right of course, assuming one of your twins slept through from birth, ate three meals plus two-three bottles every day, (and only during the day), and only soiled about 6-8 nappies, and was happy to play by themselves for a good part of the day, and was also happy to be babysat once or twice a week (from birth). Then it’s exactly like having twins.

Or, it’s like having a newborn and a 14 month old.

Never read the comments OP, never read the comments, lol.

#21 nup

Posted 12 June 2018 - 08:53 PM

There's a sanctinanny in a group (or more) I'm in and she is the expert on every topic ever. Id wager a bet it's the same woman. I have two close in age and no it's not like twins.

Edited by nup, 12 June 2018 - 08:58 PM.


#22 opethmum

Posted 12 June 2018 - 08:54 PM

Do giphy to express the exact sentiment you're feeling, it is not like you will run into her at playgroup. I agree in reporting it to admin group as she is not really supposed to be there. I know a lot of twin mums and I have had 3 close together and it is not the same thing.

#23 AdelTwins

Posted 12 June 2018 - 09:07 PM

I have 6yo twin boys and OMG it never stops. The play fights, bickering and competitiveness! There is nothing like having a sibling the exact same age as you. Everything feels amplified. It's the same "noise" just "louder", iykwim?

There's a reason we waited until they were in Kindy/school to TTC again.

#24 newmumandexcited

Posted 13 June 2018 - 05:06 AM

View PostAdelTwins, on 12 June 2018 - 09:07 PM, said:

I have 6yo twin boys and OMG it never stops. The play fights, bickering and competitiveness! There is nothing like having a sibling the exact same age as you. Everything feels amplified. It's the same "noise" just "louder", iykwim?

There's a reason we waited until they were in Kindy/school to TTC again.

I think you are brave to try again - I would love just one more but I’m terrified of having another set of twins. Mine are just sixteen months though and I’m run ragged.

Edited by newmumandexcited, 13 June 2018 - 05:41 AM.


#25 Manicmum

Posted 13 June 2018 - 07:41 AM

The woman that nanny worked for must have been an excellent parent. Possibly it helped that they workload was shared.








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