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This is going to sound so stupid but...


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#1 PsySquirrel

Posted 14 January 2019 - 08:51 AM

I only just realised in the practical realms of my body that I am going to be giving birth in a few months.

Like, I always knew that it was going to happen but I recently saw a pregnant woman with a huge belly and I mentally transposed that belly onto my frame and had a mental thing where I couldn't actually think for almost a full minute.

That bump is going to be squeezed out of my pelvis. How does anyone do this? How on earth does anyone do this? WTF is wrong with our bodies that that is how we bring new life into the world.

I always knew that this was going to happen in the abstract, but I'd never really considered the logistics before.

Ugh

#2 seayork2002

Posted 14 January 2019 - 08:54 AM

I did have a bit of a 'far out how the heck does something X size get out of something that small' then thought it has happened to millions over time so there must be a way but sounds painful so went for the epidural option and never felt a thing

#3 ~J_WTF~

Posted 14 January 2019 - 08:56 AM

There is nothing wrong with our bodies, its ****ing awesome that we can grow and then birth (vaginal or c section) a teeny tiny human!

I just go with it’s one day out of my life. That’s so insignificant considering all the days, most of us are lucky enough to live!

#4 born.a.girl

Posted 14 January 2019 - 08:57 AM

ha ha (not really!) yeah, lightbulb moment.


I had one of those early in the morning of an elective caesar.  The nurse was fishing through the stuff I'd brought in, asking which outfit I wanted them to put on the baby.


The BABY!!!????!!  Really?  A living, breathing baby?

Until then it had kinda just been a pregnancy.  It was high risk and I think I was just protecting myself from the worst case scenario by not ever imagining myself with an actual baby.

I remember washing and hanging on the line hand-me-downs thinking 'what a fraud'.

Edited by born.a.girl, 14 January 2019 - 08:57 AM.


#5 Kabu84

Posted 14 January 2019 - 08:57 AM

I agree it is such a strange thing to get your head around. When I was pregnant with my first I was a bit panicked towards the end thinking 'the measurements don't add up - I don't think the baby will actually be able to come out'. But it is not like the whole bump comes out in one go, it is all the fluid first and then the baby and then the placenta. But things do stretch pretty well and it does work somehow so our bodies are indeed pretty amazing.

#6 tayto...

Posted 14 January 2019 - 08:57 AM

Oh hon!

Some would say it’s the price we pay for eve taking the apple ;-) or for being able to walk upright on two legs!

But honestly your body is amazing and if/when it needs help we have amazing medical staff to help us (and don’t you or your birth partner be afraid to speak up if you need help and it’s not been forthcoming).

There were 2 videos I saw that helped me picture how it all actually happens...will see if I can find them

Big hugs, you’ve got this x

#7 tayto...

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:00 AM

This one uses a balloon and ping pong ball...

https://m.youtube.co...h?v=URyEZusnjBI

The other one I saw at antenatal class and was similar to this, a transparent animation...

https://m.youtube.co...h?v=07ayxqS0R0I

Edited by tayto.tired, 14 January 2019 - 09:05 AM.


#8 Mollyksy

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:01 AM

View Postborn.a.girl, on 14 January 2019 - 08:57 AM, said:

ha ha (not really!) yeah, lightbulb moment.


I had one of those early in the morning of an elective caesar.  The nurse was fishing through the stuff I'd brought in, asking which outfit I wanted them to put on the baby.


The BABY!!!????!!  Really?  A living, breathing baby?

Until then it had kinda just been a pregnancy.  It was high risk and I think I was just protecting myself from the worst case scenario by not ever imagining myself with an actual baby.

I remember washing and hanging on the line hand-me-downs thinking 'what a fraud'.

This was me. After 5 years, 7 miscarriages, and bed rest since 27 weeks, I had no thoughts beyond pregnancy. I do recall having those wtf thoughts the morning of my c section.

OP all the very best.

#9 seayork2002

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:01 AM

sorry a bit OT but I by the time I had a baby myself I had washed, fed, changed a millions nappies but my mum was at my son's birth and stayed with us for 2 weeks after the birth and I never forget the first night we added water to the baby bath, and my mum, my husband and I were all in the bathroom and mum was about to hand me our son and I thought  'what do you expect me to now'?

I knew all the practical side but still I still look at him now he is only a few cm's shorter than me and think 'flipping heck I am a parent'

#10 Mollyksy

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:05 AM

As for the method humans birth, the look on my 5 year olds face when I explained how most babies are born. He knows he was a c section but the incredulous, you can't be serious, wtf look on his face at the concept of vaginal birth was hilarious. I wonder if it will stay with him, and will save it to tell any future pregnant partner of his! To tell the truth, it is a bit wtf!

I do recall being sarcastic at IVF transfer that the popping of the baby in was so much easier than getting it out again!!

#11 Lucrezia Borgia

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:09 AM

it’s daunting - a by product of evolution I’m  afraid - in order to walk upright we developed a narrower pelvis - combined with the big brains (ergo big heads) of homo sapiens - women got the raw end of the deal....but our bodies are amazing....you can do it! (and there’s drugs).


#12 Daffy2016

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:12 AM

It is very weird, I agree!

My ‘huh’ moment was when they actually placed DD on my chest - I remember thinking ‘it’s a baby!’. I’m not sure what else I was expecting but finally seeing the thing that had been kicking me in the ribs for months was a bit of a shock.

I think it’s totally normal that we focus a lot on the immediate and then have a little brain skip at some point.

#13 ~LemonMyrtle~

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:14 AM

the vagina is quite stretchy and a babys head is quite flexible too.  Here is an MRI of a woman giving birth.  You can see the babys head deform a little bit as it exits. the body is pretty squishy too and easily follows (everything going well of course).  Its all possible, not easy but possible.

https://www.youtube....h?v=5MSS2b9CVlA

And remember, a large part of a huge belly is fluid and placenta, its not all baby.  Newborns are tiny, they just grow so fast that we dont often see them in our every day lives, we see big older babies.

#14 Lallalla

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:22 AM

My sisters and I were all in denial about how big we would eventually get in early pregnancy. I also distinctly remember only thinking about the realities of giving birth AFTER I had gotten pregnant, both times, and my pregnancies were not even that far apart, and I had sworn on the night my oldest was born she would have to be an only child. Ha!
To this day what my body was capable of doing, that I didn’t even know I knew how to do, amazes me. I think that’s one of the reasons why every single baby is a freaking miracle

#15 overlytired

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:34 AM

Later, when they're old enough to have a deep conversation, your background thought is "I made you". :huh:

#16 Literary Lemur

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:57 AM

I recall thinking "They are going to just let me take this baby home?'

#17 ~J_WTF~

Posted 14 January 2019 - 09:59 AM

View PostLiterary Lemur, on 14 January 2019 - 09:57 AM, said:

I recall thinking "They are going to just let me take this baby home?'

Haha me too..

Along with waking up in the night thinking I wish someone would shut that crying baby up, only to realise it was mine and I was the one who needed to sort it out!!

#18 wallofdodo

Posted 14 January 2019 - 10:01 AM

Yes, I had that happen too. All of a sudden it occurred to me, it has to come out. I think it is part of the survival of the species.

#19 Romeo Void

Posted 14 January 2019 - 10:11 AM

View Postborn.a.girl, on 14 January 2019 - 08:57 AM, said:

ha ha (not really!) yeah, lightbulb moment.


I had one of those early in the morning of an elective caesar.  The nurse was fishing through the stuff I'd brought in, asking which outfit I wanted them to put on the baby.


The BABY!!!????!!  Really?  A living, breathing baby?

Until then it had kinda just been a pregnancy.  It was high risk and I think I was just protecting myself from the worst case scenario by not ever imagining myself with an actual baby.

I remember washing and hanging on the line hand-me-downs thinking 'what a fraud'.
This was so very much me :)

#20 boatiebabe

Posted 14 January 2019 - 10:12 AM

Happened to me too and I FREAKED out. Then I found hypnobabies and I gained a lot of confidence and lost my fear.

I've had two awesome births.

If you can eliminate the fear birthing is much easier,  whichever way they come out.

Another thing that really helped was my sister telling me it was just going to be a day or less of "work" and it would be all over. That and the fact that women go back for more!!!

#21 JoanJett

Posted 14 January 2019 - 10:13 AM

I remember being 8 months pregnant the first time around and suddenly noticing toddlers everywhere.  Not the cute cherubic babbling sweet toddlers.  The ones in their tantrum frenzies and moments of obstinate opposition.  I'd been so busy thinking about a "baby" after years of fertility treatment, that I hadn't quite thought beyond...

As for giving birth, my favourite moment was running into an acquaintance who was 7-8 months pregnant.  We were discussing when the baby was due and my then 7 year old, whose eyes were firmly at belly level, looked up at her and said, "well that's going to hurt coming out".  Never a truer word spoken.

Whichever way you have your baby, it will be just the first day of their life... and the last day of life as you know it ;)  

Best wishes for a healthy baby.

#22 blackcat20

Posted 14 January 2019 - 10:42 AM

I'm still trying not to think about the birth bit. Happy to think about once the baby is here, but not the bit between now and then.

#23 nom_de_plume

Posted 14 January 2019 - 10:51 AM

View PostDaffy2016, on 14 January 2019 - 09:12 AM, said:

It is very weird, I agree!

My ‘huh’ moment was when they actually placed DD on my chest - I remember thinking ‘it’s a baby!’. I’m not sure what else I was expecting but finally seeing the thing that had been kicking me in the ribs for months was a bit of a shock.

I think it’s totally normal that we focus a lot on the immediate and then have a little brain skip at some point.

This was my exact reaction (and words) when they placed DD on my chest too! The midwife joked and said ‘were you expecting a kitten?’

I had an ‘oh sh*t’ moment when I was about 36 weeks and realised one way or another, the baby had to come out.

I had a vaginal delivery without drugs. I won’t sugar coat it. It hurt. If you get to the hospital in time they will give you drugs and it may not be quite so painful. The good news is labour is finite. It always ends.

#24 TrixieBelden

Posted 14 January 2019 - 11:02 AM

Haha yes there’s a big difference between ‘babies come out of vaginas’ and ‘a baby is coming out of my vagina’.

I found the realisations afterwards weird too - oh this used to be in there? Really? Seems so unlikely.

#25 MsLaurie

Posted 14 January 2019 - 11:19 AM

I had my second a week ago and i’m still looking at her going BUT HOW DID YOU FIT?!?
Due to precipitous labour I ended up with no pain relief and ooooh boy did I feel every bit of the stretching and separating that happens. Yikes. But, an hour later (after some stitches and a brief nap) I was able to walk myself to the shower and get cleaned up and actually felt okay. Tender and bruised and a bit shell-shocked that it had all happened so quickly but not too bad.
My mantra was “it’s one or two days of misery and then it’s DONE”.



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