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sep anxiety in a 16m old ...does it sound normal?

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#1 PandoBox

Posted 11 February 2019 - 12:35 PM

DD will cry and run to me to cover her face around friends she doesn't know well especially if they come too close to her or talk to her. Sometimes it takes 3 or 4 visits for her to be ok and not cry around the person.

She is fine in parks and fine with kids approaching her in parks.

She is reasonably ok in play group although it can feel overwhelming sometimes and sometimes when there are too many kids around her she will once again run into my arms..but she's generally ok.

At home she seems ok for me to leave her in her play pen for 10-15mins and she will play on her own...but often prefers for me to sit next to her while she plays. She's happy to be left with family she knows without clinging to me.

Basically I've noticed that whenever she's around a larger group of people or kids she doesn't know she gets uncomfortable and runs to me crying/wanting hugs.

How can I make her more socially confident?

#2 Crombek

Posted 11 February 2019 - 01:04 PM

Sounds totally normal & developmentally appropriate. As to what improves confidence? Time. And allowing her to work through it at her own pace. Young children look to attachment figures to help them manage their emotions, they don’t have the ability to do it for themselves. The more she sees you as a safe base, the more she will gradually move out when she is ready to practice. Each child has their own comfort levels. If you want to, look into the Circle of Security, it has some really great explanations around this & how you can join with your child as they get bolder.

#3 Daffy2016

Posted 12 February 2019 - 11:40 AM

My DD is about the same age and is going through something similar. She’s never bothered before but suddenly me leaving the room is a massive drama. She has also always loved people and going to daycare but is now grumpy on drop of and starts wailing when she sees me at pick up (she’s fine during the day!).

I’m pretty sure it’s a combination of teething and a wonder week leap. Hoping she’s back to her usual self soon!

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