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Really at a loss with toilet training

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#26 Caribou

Posted 09 July 2019 - 08:49 AM

How long have you been training? It doesn’t happen overnight. DS took8 days to click. A have a friend whoseDS took six weeks to click. Another parent had to try 4 different times (timed with holidays) before her child clicked.

DD never clicked until she was 4 but you could take her to the loo from 2yrs and she’d use loo but didn’t take herself until 4.

The age range for readiness varies. Every kid is different but it can take typically 3-6montha to toilet train.

#27 Mae55

Posted 09 July 2019 - 08:53 AM

My three year old refused to wear a nappy and would wee/poo on the toilet BUT there were so many accidents up until he was nearly five!! Stay with the nappies till she is ready!

#28 liveworkplay

Posted 09 July 2019 - 10:14 AM

 José, on 08 July 2019 - 08:59 PM, said:

oh dear!

good on you for admitting to feelings of embarrassment and of being ashamed.
while this is understandable i hope you can move beyond these uncomfortable feelings.

my favourite advice i ever hear is wait until they are ready. so much angst occurs when trying to toilet train a child who isnt ready.

This. Most of the angst of "toilet training" comes form trying to force the kids into it too early. I always say I didn't train my kids, they just did it themselves. They were ready, we took nappies off and bar the occasional accident with DD1 (DD2 never had any) a couple of days and that was it. The only small setback was DD3 insisting on putting a nappy on to poo. It is common (some kids fear letting go of poo's), and she did it for a while but eventually got over it.

Edited by liveworkplay, 09 July 2019 - 10:15 AM.

#29 JomoMum

Posted 09 July 2019 - 11:49 AM

Is she just turned 3, or closer to 4?

There is such an unrealistic expectation when it comes to what a toilet trained child looks like. How big they are, how well they talk. “They really should be toilet trained by now”. Pft.

There would be very few parents who have successfully TT a child who wasn’t ready. There are obviously exceptions based on other possible issues, but for a typical child, it will happen when it happens.

Our daycare has been giving us grief for months as DS was due to move into the preschool room 2 mo the after his third birthday. So I had been stressing about it and encouraging him when he just wasn’t ready.

Magically, and by surprise for us all, he came home two days before his birthday and said he wanted to wear undies. That was kind of it.

You can lead a horse to water, can’t make it drink ..

#30 *Spikey*

Posted 09 July 2019 - 12:00 PM

What they've all been saying. Also, modern disposables also leave kids with a dry sensation, so they don't get the opportunity to link the sensation of needing to go, then releasing, with wee and being wet.

I found that summer was so much easier to manage this - I got a stack of those terry pants for toilet training, some plastic pants for over the top, and let her train herself. Once she connected the feelings with the result, she pretty much mistake free after the first two weeks. Oh, and she was three and a half when that happened.

#31 tryagain2

Posted 09 July 2019 - 12:25 PM

 movingonup, on 09 July 2019 - 08:43 AM, said:

This thread has just given me a reason to smile today! My DS is 3 years, 3 months, refuses to toilet train and is quite polite about it "no thank you mummy; I think i'll just stay in my nappy". He's tall too, so I'm getting so much grief.
But this thread has given me a good boost to recognise I'm doing the right thing leaving him be, and he'll go when he goes. Thanks crew :)

I ditto this. Needed to read this thread after feeling like this with my just 3yo. Haven't wanted to push and seem to go through stages of being more interested and then the interest stops. At the moment it's 'no thank you' every time I ask if he wants to go to the toilet so I'm not going to push. We shall wait!

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