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Help with sleep routine


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#1 nasty buddha

Posted 21 July 2019 - 07:54 PM

Hi EB,

Feeling quite deflated here.  

My 12 month old used to self settle sleep around the 6 month mark. Not sure when it became a pattern, but now I breastfeed to sleep for every evening sleep. It can take up to 2 hours to achieve this.


Most  daysleeps are achieved by self settling though.  

We have started daycare and daysleeps are difficult there and mostly non existant.


My 12 month old screams hysterically if anyone else tries to put them to sleep, including DH.

I have no idea what to do. Any ideas?

#2 nasty buddha

Posted 21 July 2019 - 08:02 PM

Thought I would add, it isn't  a problem for  me. Sure, would be nice if it were quicker so I would  have more of an evening to recharge myself. (I have a toddler  too).

However, I was hoping daysleeps at daycare would  be as easy as they are at home. The thought of my baby crying like that just makes me want to stop daycare. Though, I would then need to quit my job. Not sure that is a good idea either for many reasons. Not sure how I can work if daycare keep calling me to come back in though.  

I know this will pass. I know this is just how it is now.

#3 Apageintime

Posted 21 July 2019 - 08:29 PM

Daycare transition Can be hard. But your baby shouldn't be left to cry excessively. And if they are, change day care.

My son didn't 'self settle' until well over 3. But started daycare at 6 months. The carers used to rock him to sleep, and then started patting him instead. I was adamant he would not be left to cry, and the carers were lovely so I had competed faith in them that he wouldn't be

#4 onetrick

Posted 21 July 2019 - 08:34 PM

Theres a 12 month sleep regression for some bugs as it's when they are learning a lot of things. We managed to bypass the 8 month one but the 12 month one hit hard!
We had a lot more refusing to day sleep type things but night was ok. At almost 15 months now the day sleeps are better than ever most days. We went from 2x 40 mins most days to at least 2x1h (2hrs today!!).
Honestly, we just persisted with self settling but comforted if needed (not cry it out as we just couldn't be bothered to be honest) and then it suddenly got better. So no real advice but a beacon of hope (hopefully!!) from a parent of a fairly average sleeper!!

#5 nasty buddha

Posted 21 July 2019 - 08:35 PM

Agree with you.

They don't leave them to cry. They try patting, rocking, etc ( so does DH) but nothing works - still  screams hysterically.

#6 400

Posted 23 July 2019 - 10:04 PM

I would say your bun is behaving like this at night because of the day struggles- probably over tired and compensating by getting a good fix of mum. Not that it helps you!

You might need to stop feeding to sleep if you’d be willing as it might be making a sleep association that prevents sleeping without it. My suggestion would be to feed, then stop and do something else like read before bed rather than using feeding as the sleep trigger.

Hope you find a solution!

#7 400

Posted 23 July 2019 - 10:08 PM

I just wanted to add- we just got past a similar episode of irrational, hysterical crying at bedtime. DS used to go down easily and self settle easily. Then around 12 months: hysterical. I work full time so DH does most of the night waking and nearly went loony himself. It was in the context of a few illnesses so we went a bit soft on him. Then, at around 13 months, with the mildest prompting from us (like 2 nights of rigid routining) and boom- our old baby was back.

Hopefully it’s just a phase!




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