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Two miscarriages and about to start the crazy ride again...

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55 replies to this topic

#26 ckmelb

Posted 12 September 2019 - 07:05 AM

Oh LadyKJStorm it is so tough to stay focused and calm. I ended up having to sleep with my phone in the bathroom charging on aeroplane mode to stop the random searching. Then I bought some paper books to focus my time on. Can you do something similar to distract?

But I would always give myself 2x 10mins each day where i could research anything I wanted to. But at the end of the 10 mins it would stop. That helped satisfy the craving but didn't get out of hand

I hope time passes quickly for you

#27 LadyKJStorm

Posted 12 September 2019 - 01:31 PM

Unfortunately i require the 6 alarms on my phone in the morning. I will try to reign it in though.

Just super tired at the moment and would love another day of sleep. Might have a look at my diary and see if i can take a day or 2 off before i start my new job in October.

#28 LadyKJStorm

Posted 17 September 2019 - 06:53 PM

Im finding the wait really difficult this time. I think its knowing that im on a mandatory 6 month break by the dr if it doesnt work. Also lots of crazy things going on at the moment. Changing jobs and grandad just had a mini stroke so not exactly all calm at the ok corral.

I broke down and did a hpt this morning even though i knew it was way too early. I dont know what i was expecting. After 2 miscarriages im not going to believe its true until i get to week 14.

I left work at lunch today. Im super tired and the medications are making me queasy.

Mostly im just feeling really sorry for myself today. Thought i would share rather than sit here miserably.

#29 IamOzgirl

Posted 17 September 2019 - 07:11 PM

Oh LadyK please find a way to look after yourself.

I know how hard it is, but believe me stress and anxiety is not going to change the outcome.

I know itโ€™s easier said than done. But really try to take a step back.

Learn to say no to yourself and to other people (if you have a lot going on)

Try and find another way to have multiple alarms.

Get an old fashion one if you must.

#30 LadyKJStorm

Posted 17 September 2019 - 07:50 PM

Thanks iamozgirl. Frankly id just like to go on leave until i start my new job but they wont let me. So trying to keep myself cool, calm and collected. Only 2 more weeks to go at work and only 3 days to go to my beta.

#31 IamOzgirl

Posted 17 September 2019 - 08:54 PM

Can you reduce the personal stress to at all?

#32 LadyKJStorm

Posted 17 September 2019 - 09:18 PM

Trying my best to.

#33 dreamweaver80

Posted 20 September 2019 - 01:16 PM

Fingers crossed for you Lady KJ! The two week wait is the absolute worst. Never mind adding work/new job stress! Try and look after yourself x

#34 LadyKJStorm

Posted 20 September 2019 - 03:16 PM

Ok. Said to dad this morning, either way its going to be good news. Either im pregnant or i can stop having all the medications that are making me sick.

So nurse rings. They have detected hcg but is only at 11 so not sure. Have to go back on tuesday and keep taking medication.

Thing thats making me positive is i did a hpt yesterday morning and got a bfn. Its supposed to pick up hcg over 5. So a day later my bloods are coming out at 11 (double). Thinking its a late implanter.

I guess in the meantime i will continue the medication.

Oh what a fun journey!!!

#35 ckmelb

Posted 20 September 2019 - 10:52 PM

Hi LadyKJ, I'm hoping this is the start of very good news for you. What's the next steps? More bloods next week?

#36 Beanette

Posted 21 September 2019 - 09:40 AM

I'm crossing my fingers for you! xx

#37 LadyKJStorm

Posted 21 September 2019 - 10:20 AM

Yep back on Tuesday for more bloods. Hoping for 44 or better!!!! ๐Ÿ˜

#38 ilovethebeach

Posted 21 September 2019 - 11:29 AM

Thinking of you

#39 LadyKJStorm

Posted 24 September 2019 - 12:31 PM

Had the blood tests this morning. Waiting sacks (obv. I've subbed the word here)!!!

#40 LadyKJStorm

Posted 24 September 2019 - 02:26 PM

Ok. 45. Weve got a race on. The clinic didnt want me to get my hopes up but its doubled every 48 hours, which wasnt happening with any of the previous ones, so heres hoping it goes well. Not sure i can handle a 3rd miscarriage in a day.

#41 MSDC

Posted 24 September 2019 - 04:38 PM

Fingers crossed for you LadyKJStorm...
I am new to this forum and have been TTC for 18 plus months now.
I too have had two miscarriages. I've only just started IVF injections yesterday and are really hoping this works for me - my time clock is running out rapidly (if it hasn't already).

#42 LadyKJStorm

Posted 24 September 2019 - 06:30 PM

Thanks miss dc. Hope all goes well for you. Fingers crossed.

#43 LadyKJStorm

Posted 26 September 2019 - 01:29 PM

Hi all

So went well today. Is up to 96.

Im going to stop posting updates now in this forum (unless something goes wrong).

Hope all your ttc after miscarriage jourmeys go well.

#44 LadyKJStorm

Posted 02 October 2019 - 04:33 PM

So i wasnt going to post again but just told that hcg hasnt increased enough and im about to have miscarriage number 3.

Made for a memorable last day at work before starting a new job tomorrow.

Dr wants to wait 6 months before doing anything. I think i might get a second opinion.

Just have to wait and see.

#45 chicken_bits

Posted 02 October 2019 - 05:07 PM

Oh NOOOOOO LadyKJStorm. I was desperately hoping you wouldn't have to post in here again. I'm so so sorry. Please do get a second opinion.

#46 2020selfcare

Posted 02 October 2019 - 05:44 PM

Big hugs, get a second opinion good idea... Lady KJ Storm can I ask how old you are?

#47 LadyKJStorm

Posted 02 October 2019 - 08:09 PM

Thanks guys.

I'm 35. I've been trying for 2 years in December. 4 transfers, 3 pregnancies. No baby.

#48 ckmelb

Posted 02 October 2019 - 08:24 PM

LadyKJstorm I am so sorry to hear that. I can't imagine how devastating it would be to get the BFP and then it to be all over.

3 pregnancies from 4 transfers sounds pretty good odds but obviously something else is going on. I agree you should get a second or third opinion to get some ideas on why the losses are happening so early. What does your FS speculate is the issue? What have they tried differently for support? I'd be potentially looking at kitchen sink kind of stuff here like progesterone, Clexane etc.

Having said all of that, please take some time to rest & recuperate if you can. Starting a new job tomorrow will obviously be tough so try and find some nice things to do for yourself, even if it's just some quiet time with a cup of tea and a book (and cake) or a pedicure or the whatever

Sending hugs from an internet random

#49 dreamweaver80

Posted 02 October 2019 - 08:27 PM

How awful for you LadyKJ, so sorry to hear.

Have you been through the whole gamut of tests to find out why you keep miscarrying? I can't remember all of them but I know there's a lot of possible causes that can be treated (Killer cells, immunity issues, thyroid, clotting disorders). My FS offered these tests to me after my first miscarriage then pretty much ordered me to do them after my second.  I can't imagine 3 miscarriages can be just random or bad luck. If your FS isn't exploring what's going on or making changes to your protocol each cycle, I'd strongly recommend seeking a second opinion. I don't know where you are but the FS I used to see is a pretty well-known expert in recurrent miscarriages (in Sydney) and I'd be happy to pass along his details privately.

I'm so sorry again, I can't imagine what you're going through.

#50 2020selfcare

Posted 02 October 2019 - 08:46 PM

35 years old is still young, i wouldn't give up hope, definitely get a second opinion, please have some time out and rest.

I married quite later in life (have been divorced now for close to 6 years) and I was blessed with two daughters in my marriage, my first one at 39 years old and with the 2nd baby not even trying at 43 years old. Both healthy daughters.

Do not give up hope. I thought I was always going to be single all my life, never marry never have children and meanwhile I would see all my friends, siblings marry, then have babies and it would make me feel even sadder! I was very happy for them, happy to play aunty but felt when is it going to be my turn if ever.
Then i decided to change a lot of things about my life, I left my full on 20 year executive career, I sold my home, moved inner city into a smaller place,  I found a part time fun job, then met my husband, then had two babies, unfortunately my marriage did not work out, but having my two daughters was something I still pinch myself and think did that really all happen.
Do not give up, you are still young and as my chinese neighbour says "whilst you are living and breathing anything is possible" , I believe in you and I believe you are going to be one of the best single mums ever! Do not give up!
Life works in mysterious ways, trust me!
I am a single mum now of two, its a hard gig but doable and you will do this too...

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