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5 month baby boy 2nd sleep over


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#1 CoffeeGuy

Posted 24 November 2019 - 05:23 PM

The mother dropped of baby with pram and baby seat ready for childcare tomorrow.

I have him from Sunday until Wednesday then the mother picks him up from child care until I pick him up friday from childcare for the weekend.  This she says continues until she leaves in December before Christmas.

Sending off Parenting payment form and care arrangement form tomorrow.  No referee for Verification of Relationship Status form so won't bother with that.

It's annoying I could not do it online as online requires information of all the people living in this building.  How do I know or care their names ages and how much rent they pay.  Geezz.

Anyway I'm going to go play with my boy.

Edited by CoffeeGuy, 24 November 2019 - 05:23 PM.


#2 Apageintime

Posted 24 November 2019 - 05:29 PM

How are you finding having him?

Have your flatmates been ok with the whole thing?

#3 onetrick

Posted 24 November 2019 - 05:54 PM

Sounds like you are getting everything organized slowly, OP.
Not sure I'd be comfortable sharing a house with people whose names I didnt know, but maybe that's just me (and I have rented a room before in a sharehouse or two... but we always knew names!) Especially with a baby :-/ I think you would be in an unusual situation to have care of a baby and not know who you were sharing the house with. Not judging you, but maybe dont be too harsh on centrelink ans what they are asking in this situation!
Have you got a car if you have the carseat? They usually recommend getting them professionally fitted (baby bunting were good as if you have installed it properly yourself you dont pay, only if it needed fixing- i think other places do this too?) as they are difficult the firstcl time you do it. Just a thought if you can fit it in tomorrow between work and pickup?

#4 IamtheMumma

Posted 24 November 2019 - 06:02 PM

Your parenting claim won't get processed until you hand in the relationship form. Every one has to do it. It is seriously insulting but welcome to applying to Centrelink.

Yes they want to know who you live with. Might be easier to wait until you have your own place.

#5 gatheringpieces

Posted 24 November 2019 - 06:24 PM

Kids Carousel at Belmont will do checks for free if you want your installation checked (if Belmont isn t too far out of your way, I'm not exactly what part of newy you're in).
But yeah baby bunting is at Warners Bay


Centrelink is hard work, but you've got to jump through the hoops if you want the payments, sorry! Good luck

#6 luke's mummu

Posted 24 November 2019 - 06:49 PM

Also call your local council/ some do baby car seat fits/checks for free

#7 CoffeeGuy

Posted 24 November 2019 - 07:18 PM

The mother set up the car seat, she seemed to know what she was doing.

Yes I have had a manual car since I bought it last Sunday.  Driving to work and around the place, I've got the hang of it now so getting him to and from childcare won't be an issue.

Not sure how the housemates will go with baby.  Time will tell.

I'll have to get some stranger to sign off on my single status if need be.  Such a strange task.

When I filled out a rent certificate for this place in Feb Centrelink was not bothered about who else lived here.

I have had housemates for years and I have enjoyed keeping the people in this house at a polite distance.  Hello is usually the extent of my conversation.

The mother wants me to bathe the baby before and after childcare and apply oil for his skin.  Seems like a lot of bathing.

Baby is asleep since 7:30pm so time for me to get some sleep before middle of the night feed.

Edited by CoffeeGuy, 24 November 2019 - 07:20 PM.


#8 Noodlez

Posted 24 November 2019 - 07:19 PM

Sounds like you live in a boarding house rather than a share house.

#9 luke's mummu

Posted 24 November 2019 - 07:22 PM

In general once a day bathing is fine for babies. Or even 2nd day if they’re not too dirty from crawling around. But maybe there’s a medical reason why the mother said to bath twice a day. Can you ask the baby’s doctor? Or a community health nurse?

Edited by luke's mummu, 24 November 2019 - 07:22 PM.


#10 Silverstreak

Posted 24 November 2019 - 08:24 PM

View PostNoodlez, on 24 November 2019 - 07:19 PM, said:

Sounds like you live in a boarding house rather than a share house.

Yep, might be one of those deals where you have your own bedroom and share a kitchen?

All the best in the coming days, Coffee Guy. Baby steps, baby steps!

#11 Babetty

Posted 24 November 2019 - 09:05 PM

Can you tell us what type of oil? The reason I ask is that Johnson's baby oil (which is a really common brand) can actually be quite bad for sensitive baby skin.

Good luck with the second sleepover.

#12 Jingleflea

Posted 24 November 2019 - 09:37 PM

Baby's skin can get dry form over washing.
I used to do every second day, with a wipe down with a damp face washer if needed.

#13 Twinmum+2

Posted 24 November 2019 - 09:39 PM

Coffeeguy I  think maybe you need to get in contact with your local baby health clinic and explain the situation to them?  They will be able to provide you with a lot more support and help than we can over the internet.  I  think in your situation it is important to have some real life people who can help you to figure out all the things you need to do for this baby.  

If you just google baby health clinics you will find your local one.  I think it is really important not to try to do this by yourself.  Having the care of a baby is tough in the best situation and this definitely doesn't sound like the ideal situation.  I know you are doing the best you can but it's important for your baby's sake to have support from some professionals who know what they are doing.

#14 Grassisgreen

Posted 24 November 2019 - 09:55 PM

You are doing great coffeeguy.

A few days in a row you might start to find it tougher as the weeks go on. Please check back in here, even just for a vent about how hard and relentless it is looking after a baby. Contact your local health nurse. You need the supports in place for when questions and concerns come up. There is also a number you can call which is really useful.

I’m interested to know a bit more about you, it may help us understand you better. Are you younger or older, from a particular cultural background (or is the mother), any disabilities?

#15 newmumandexcited

Posted 24 November 2019 - 10:20 PM

Doing great, one day at a time. Little babies are really hard - you’re not alone if you ever feel this.

#16 Cat12

Posted 24 November 2019 - 10:28 PM

I read your last thread and really hope you’re not taking everyone for ride. It all seems very strange. Can I ask if you’re from another country? The way you write is a little unusual.

Cat

#17 CoffeeGuy

Posted 25 November 2019 - 05:35 AM

I am 30 Australian, the mother is Filipino. No disability.

I believe it is the Johnson's baby oil. Mother has been using it for him without a problem up to this point.

No crying but he needed a second feed in the night. I'm a bit tired I'll get myself a power nap today.

#18 Feral-as-Meggs

Posted 25 November 2019 - 06:38 AM

View PostTwinmum+2, on 24 November 2019 - 09:39 PM, said:

Coffeeguy I  think maybe you need to get in contact with your local baby health clinic and explain the situation to them?  They will be able to provide you with a lot more support and help than we can over the internet.  I  think in your situation it is important to have some real life people who can help you to figure out all the things you need to do for this baby.  

If you just google baby health clinics you will find your local one.  I think it is really important not to try to do this by yourself.  Having the care of a baby is tough in the best situation and this definitely doesn't sound like the ideal situation.  I know you are doing the best you can but it's important for your baby's sake to have support from some professionals who know what they are doing.

Second this.   OP just in case you don’t know - many, probably almost all, first time parents see the local baby health clinic.  It wouldn’t be seen as not being able to cope or anything.   They may also have a single dads group you can contact.

#19 PoolsideMasterchef

Posted 25 November 2019 - 07:05 AM

View PostFeral-as-Meggs, on 25 November 2019 - 06:38 AM, said:

Second this.   OP just in case you don’t know - many, probably almost all, first time parents see the local baby health clinic.  It wouldn’t be seen as not being able to cope or anything.   They may also have a single dads group you can contact.

I was going to suggest joining a parent group (from what I could see our local ones had a couple of dads ) with similar aged parents for support.  I have a 6 month old, it can be a hard stage but it sounds like you are doing great :)  Hang in there.

#20 StoneFoxArrow

Posted 25 November 2019 - 07:08 AM

View PostCat12, on 24 November 2019 - 10:28 PM, said:

I read your last thread and really hope you’re not taking everyone for ride. It all seems very strange. Can I ask if you’re from another country? The way you write is a little unusual.

Cat

Plenty of people don't have perfect grammar or these days, skip non-essential words (especially younger people). I don't write like that here, but I definitely do IRL.  

It does seem a bit strange, but I'm sure things like this happen more than we're privy to. I don't think the OP has given us any real reason to doubt that his story is 100% true. So let's just run with that.

#21 Twinmum+2

Posted 25 November 2019 - 08:39 AM

View PostCoffeeGuy, on 25 November 2019 - 05:35 AM, said:

I am 30 Australian, the mother is Filipino. No disability.

I believe it is the Johnson's baby oil. Mother has been using it for him without a problem up to this point.

No crying but he needed a second feed in the night. I'm a bit tired I'll get myself a power nap today.

How are you going with sterilising all the bottles and making up the formula?  Also he will be starting solid food soon if he hasn't already... Do you know how you are going to manage that?

#22 spartan_mum

Posted 25 November 2019 - 10:35 AM

I also think you should go to the local health clinic and speak to a nurse. I always felt so much better after seeing them and being able to talk through my concerns and worries.

Most of the time, they were lovely and had some really good suggestions that I hadn't thought of even though i wasn't a first time mum when my twins were born.

It really is worthwhile.

#23 CoffeeGuy

Posted 26 November 2019 - 07:04 AM

Bit of a rough night last night.  Baby woke up around 3am and wouldn't go back asleep and fussed unless I rocked him for a while.  Eventually laying down with him in my arms until he was very sleepy and put him back into his bed to sleep.  That was tiring but I got through it.

He did ok at childcare, they lady said he likes to be picked up a lot and suggested he start solids soon.  He is not interested in solids yet.

I'm watching a video on starting solids and every time the baby makes a noise I look over to my baby haha.

Went to Centrelink they have asked me to come in Wednesday morning to sort out parenting payment.

#24 Apageintime

Posted 26 November 2019 - 01:04 PM

Ask centrelink for contact with a social worker or parenting classes, so so helpful.

I did the circle of security course when my son was small and found it very useful.

#25 Silverstreak

Posted 26 November 2019 - 04:50 PM

And ring your local council for details of your local maternal child health nurse, they're usually located at the local community centre. They can do all your baby wellness checks up to the age of four, if I remember and can put you in contact with parent groups and playgroups. I highly recommend it.

Also, just wondering if you have your baby's green book? It's issued at the hospital after birth, so you can track your baby's milestones and vaccinations.

Your ex probably has it, but it's a good thing for you to have a look at too and bring to any wellness check appointments. From memory, I took DS when he was a baby, when he was starting solids, then aged two, where I had to fill out a speech questionnaire, then before school. They do eye tests and screen for speech difficulties.




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