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#76 ExpatInAsia

Posted 03 December 2019 - 06:31 PM

 ~J_F~, on 02 December 2019 - 09:35 PM, said:

Why do you think it’s for you to insert yourself into this?

It would have been reported to the ranger, it’s for then and your brother to sort out.

You involving yourself could complicate your relationship further.

If she thinks her nephew is in danger then she has the right to “insert herself” to ensure his safety.


 Noodlez, on 03 December 2019 - 05:49 AM, said:



You are not OP? Was your nephew attacked too? I think you need help as you clearly have a thing about dogs.

It was the parents lack of supervision which is at fault not the dog.

Yes it was the lack of parental supervision and their over indulgence of the dog that has led to this situation. That does not mean the dog does not face any consequences. I think the child’s safety is paramount. If the parents can’t be trusted to supervise the dog properly and ensure that child is protected then the dog needs to be rehoused or if that is not an option then perhaps euthanasia does need to be considered.

I adore our dog but I can still see there is an issue here. I think some dog lovers are just as one eyed as the dog haters.

#77 onetrick

Posted 03 December 2019 - 07:14 PM

That poor baby :(
I agree with some of the pps that it is your brothers fault, not the dog alone. We have a small dog of similar size, and when DS was crawling was the worst time for her (the dog). DS didnt understand boundaries and would get up in her space if we let him. It was up to us to keep the two apart, though, and gosh it was tough! We often shut the dog in our bedroom/ outside for respite (ours and hers!), but that's part of being a pet owner with kids- teaching them all boundaries.
To be honest, if it were my brother, I'd probably see what changes he has made in response to this before reporting- does he feed the dog in a separate area (we feed ours outside, others have suggested the laundry with a baby gate/ shut door)? Has he looked at dog training? Does he monitor the child's movements near the dog more closely now?
If nothing has changed (or not enough in your opinion), then by all means, a report might be warranted as you are protecting your nephew, but if things have been put in place to make things change, then I'd stick to asking for the dog to be away from your kids and not reporting for now. I dont think this is a case of do it now or not at all?
I hope your nephew is ok, though :( do you have a dog yourself, OP? It could be worth your nephew seeing another friendly dog (you said their dog was snappy??) So he isnt scared of all dogs. Maybe not now, but in future.

#78 ilovethebeach

Posted 03 December 2019 - 07:19 PM

Hi All,

Id like to thank those who all gave useful suggestions.

Just to clarify as some people seem to be ‘infering’ things from what i said/ didnt say - can i say which were pretty much all wrong.

I was asking about reporting as i knew nothing about mandatory reporting. I have no intention of making a report.

I would encourage those that have come in attacking others to maybe be a bit kinder.

Also I dont want fiction to get in the way of facts, so romeo void re your comment about my need for control as I apparently ‘raised’ him yes i did raise him & im fantastically proud of it you dont have much choice when your mum dies & your dad takes off permanently because he cant deal with his grief or raise 2 teens. Some of us dont have picture perfect lives im sorry if you find that hard to understand.

On that note im asking the mods to turn off comments.

Have a great night & give your kids a hug
Xoxo

Edited by ilovethebeach, 03 December 2019 - 07:39 PM.


#79 *Spikey*

Posted 03 December 2019 - 07:45 PM

 ilovethebeach, on 03 December 2019 - 07:19 PM, said:

Hi All,

Id like to thank those who all gave useful suggestions.

Just to clarify as some people seem to be ‘infering’ things from what i said/ didnt say - can i say which were pretty much all wrong.

I was asking about reporting as i knew nothing about mandatory reporting. I have no intention of making a report.

I would encourage those that have come in attacking others to maybe be a bit kinder.

Also I dont want fiction to get in the way of facts, so romeo vid re your comment about my need for control as I apparently ‘raised’ him yes i did raise him & im fantastically proud of it you dont have much choice when your mum dies & your dad takes off permanently because he cant deal with his grief or raise 2 teens. Some of us dont have picture perfect lives im sorry if you find that hard to understand.

On that note im asking the mods to turn off comments.

Have a great night & give your kids a hug
Xoxo

Seems a little unfair that you want a more general discussion to stop because you didn't like all of the answers.

I have no doubt that you raised your brother. Plenty of people parent their younger siblings, stuff happens and some kids are more responsible that the adults who walk out on them.

I don't think anyone doubts that, but without context, its a bit hard to gauge how vested you are in continuing to parent your brother, and if you need to draw the line.

I am not a fan of small dogs. I am not a fan of untrained dogs, god knows I've spent enough time training dogs over the years. It is a really horrible, and sadly preventable, accident. I think you are wise to ask the question of your brother about what he is doing, and make your decisions about visiting based on that.

Which is pretty much where you should be involved. Your brother gets to make the decisions about his dog and medical treatment of his son. If you don't like the way he sought medical treatment, report your brother the DHS for neglect. If you think the dog is dangerous, report it to the council if your brother doesn't have it PTS. And I'm sure your brother will totally appreciate you making decisions for him and challenging his judgement when it comes to his family.

Which is what we've said - you already told us what he'd done in response, and we're telling you that you don't need to step in and parent your nephew or your brother.

#80 Chelli

Posted 03 December 2019 - 08:01 PM

Closing this thread now as per OP request




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