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What do you do?


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#1 AxeTheMax

Posted 06 December 2019 - 09:04 PM

This year hasn't been the best year for my mental health, and one of the things contributing to it, is I feel like all I do is work and home life. I feel disconnected from the friends I use to spend time with - school mums, who liked me didn't work full time and could get together regularly.  But now the kids are in or nearly at high school and working full-time we never get to see each (although its tried every now and then).

Today it got to me, and discussing with DH, he suggested at first a sport since I just finished up being on the committee of one of our sporting club which he plays, but I cannot play any sport of any kind!! He then suggested online group.

So (after that long wind introduction!), what do you do other than work and home to get out and be with people?? Would love some ideas!

#2 ipsee

Posted 06 December 2019 - 09:20 PM

Some people love choirs. I can't sing or play sport, so i don't know either!

#3 mumbag

Posted 06 December 2019 - 09:25 PM

The best thing I've done for my mental health in recent years is go back to uni. I've met interesting people, explored my interests and even got a part-time job through my studies. Might not be what you're after but just an idea :)

#4 lozoodle

Posted 06 December 2019 - 09:27 PM

I joined a group PT bootcamp type thing, I felt so awkward at first but I've met some great people and I always feel so much better after I've been. Its like cheap therapy, having a laugh and getting a bit of a workout at the same time.

#5 Lime-Polka-Dot

Posted 06 December 2019 - 09:27 PM

I feel you. I'm a single parent who works with children so I feel like my entire life is dedicated to being responsible for children, either my own or other peoples. My entire life is DD and work / home duties / working from home. My social life is non existent and has been for some time.

#6 can'tstayaway

Posted 06 December 2019 - 10:20 PM

Volunteer.

I’ve met new people with the different groups I volunteer with.  One’s environmental regeneration so physical work and the other is like a soup kitchen but more the admin side because that’s the hours I’m available.

I’ve also been thinking about learning to dance and learn another language.

I have also met people through my regular pilates which is good for my body and mind.  

Go and see shows/talks etc. With instagram, I’m noticing more connections between people who would otherwise not have met. I especially notice this in the creative arts world.

#7 AxeTheMax

Posted 07 December 2019 - 06:43 AM

Thank you everyone for your suggestions, when DH and I were talking last night I couldn't think if anything but know some ideas :)

Hopefully in the school holidays it will give me time to get into something! Maybe get myself into a routine and healthy mindset before I go back to work.

#8 kimasa

Posted 07 December 2019 - 06:47 AM

I'm part of a women's circle. We meditate, talk about problems, support each other, eat cake. It's really lovely.

#9 sammyv

Posted 07 December 2019 - 06:55 AM

I started dancing again - I learn tap.  So much fun, I look forward to it every week.

#10 ~LemonMyrtle~

Posted 07 December 2019 - 07:22 AM

Not me, but a friend of mine joined a “walking netball” group. No running allowed, but otherwise the rules are the same.
Sounded like a great idea for an intro back into a team sport.

I don’t do anything outside of work really, although I do crochet.

But, between family events and friend events, and kids parties etc etc, we end up going out once a week anyway. On average.

#11 babybug15

Posted 07 December 2019 - 07:25 AM

View Postipsee, on 06 December 2019 - 09:20 PM, said:

Some people love choirs. I can't sing or play sport, so i don't know either!

I can't sing... but I love my choir! We aim to be inclusive and welcoming to all abilities and don't have any auditions or mandatory attendance.

I joined when DS was a few months old as I knew I needed to have a reason to leave the house without him.

#12 Lifesgood

Posted 07 December 2019 - 07:30 AM

View PostAxeTheMax, on 06 December 2019 - 09:04 PM, said:

This year hasn't been the best year for my mental health, and one of the things contributing to it, is I feel like all I do is work and home life. I feel disconnected from the friends I use to spend time with - school mums, who liked me didn't work full time and could get together regularly.  But now the kids are in or nearly at high school and working full-time we never get to see each (although its tried every now and then).

Today it got to me, and discussing with DH, he suggested at first a sport since I just finished up being on the committee of one of our sporting club which he plays, but I cannot play any sport of any kind!! He then suggested online group.

So (after that long wind introduction!), what do you do other than work and home to get out and be with people?? Would love some ideas!
Your DH is spot on - one of the best proven treatments for poor mental health is excercise. I have chronic depression (I'm medicated for it) but the best treatment for me has been joining a mature age women's soccer team. It has changed everything for me. They are an awesome bunch of women. And the soccer is fun! DH says he hasn't seen me with such a wide smile on my face in years.

#13 Dianalynch

Posted 07 December 2019 - 07:35 AM

I joined a political party, I volunteer for them, attend meetings, and now I’m involved in policy work. The best things is meeting such a diverse range of people, all ages, different life stages, but we have values in common. It’s good fun.

#14 Bethlehem Babe

Posted 07 December 2019 - 07:39 AM

I play sport, volunteer for the sport and I have another volunteer role. This all helps. I also am studying.
Our local library offers book groups so I’m thinking about joining one there.

#15 luke's mummu

Posted 07 December 2019 - 12:15 PM

Yoga. I also volunteer with a charity collecting bread from a bakery at the close of business and delivering it to local families. Both are very good for my mental health

#16 JRA

Posted 07 December 2019 - 12:18 PM

I volunteer for a sporting club, that takes somewhere between 5 and 40hrs/week, and I do cross stitch, and for exercise I swim.

Edited by JRA, 07 December 2019 - 12:18 PM.


#17 Byjingoalltheway

Posted 07 December 2019 - 12:59 PM

View Postkimasa, on 07 December 2019 - 06:47 AM, said:

I'm part of a women's circle. We meditate, talk about problems, support each other, eat cake. It's really lovely.

This sounds interesting, I have seen one locally, but it seems it’s maybe in a religious setting??! I’m not religious at all!!

View Post~LemonMyrtle~, on 07 December 2019 - 07:22 AM, said:

Not me, but a friend of mine joined a “walking netball” group. No running allowed, but otherwise the rules are the same.
Sounded like a great idea for an intro back into a team sport

It is so fun! I stopped going, though I’m not 100% sure why, there were so many lovely people. Average age was probably about 60, but ages ranged from 21 to 75! I’ll go back next year I think :)

#18 kimasa

Posted 07 December 2019 - 01:29 PM

Byjingo some are linked to religion, others, like the one I'm in are just based around relaxation, meditation and shared experiences.

It's kind of luck of the draw as to which type is around you.

#19 missminx

Posted 07 December 2019 - 01:42 PM

Book club
Meditation class once a week
Craft - card making, knitting, sewing
Gym for fitness
Yoga is popular in my group of friends
Look at meetup.com for some ideas about social groups in your area

#20 missminx

Posted 07 December 2019 - 01:42 PM

Forgot to suggest School of Life if you are in Melbourne or Sydney, they run some great talks and workshops on social skills, connecting with others and finding purpose and meaning in life.

Also Google Laneway Learning, they run heaps of cheap and fun classes and talks on just about anything you can imagine.

Edited by missminx, 07 December 2019 - 01:45 PM.


#21 kyrrie

Posted 07 December 2019 - 01:56 PM

MH issues have meant I haven’t been able to work for the past nearly 2 years so I got really isolated.  Recently I’ve met people through my DBT group and we meet once a week to walk and have lunch. I’ve also started volunteering at the school uniform shop. Both are really helping me to at least try to gain some sort of equilibrium!

#22 PrincessPeach

Posted 07 December 2019 - 02:16 PM

A lot of my friends go to parkrun on a Saturday morning. As a non-runner, its not my cup of tea. But prior to having the kids I went to yoga & found the community classes quite good for a social gathering. The gym classes are good, but the social side isnt there as much.

#23 Prancer is coming

Posted 07 December 2019 - 04:43 PM

I second park run.  I could barely run for a minute 9 months ago.  I did a couch to 5km program, which basically teaches you to run in 8 weeks - or a little more if your fitness is not great or life gets in the way.  I found it strangely addictive and park run is such a friendly community.  Most meet up for a coffee afterwards - I have never been but is open to anyone.

I am not that sporty and tend to stress about Team sports and am more into doing my own thing and catching up with people  for a coffee afterwards.  It is a great form of stress relief.  I knocked 2 minutes off my best time when I went for a run straight after a run in with the kid’s school!

#24 **Tiger*Filly**

Posted 07 December 2019 - 04:55 PM

I do ballet twice a week. And I volunteer at a repair café.
I'm part of a group of sewists and we talk on Instagram and meet up every now and then. And I knit and sometimes go to a crafternoon at a local yarn shop. And I play the ukulele sometimes. And have an online mother's group (that originated on EB actually,  many years ago) we chat daily in a Facebook group and see each other occasionally.

#25 Starflash

Posted 07 December 2019 - 07:16 PM

Ballet, usually just once a week, would love to do more...  Finding the idea of book club tempting again, though I've never been to a good one. On mat leave for a year, missing my brain :/




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