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Delayed FYOS, any regrets?


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#1 IamtheMumma

Posted 09 January 2020 - 09:08 PM

For those who chose to delay their child's first year of schooling, do you regret it?

Starting school at 6 or 5 turning 6 in the first half of the year.

Edited for clarity.

Edited by IamtheMumma, 09 January 2020 - 09:31 PM.


#2 Ozquoll

Posted 09 January 2020 - 09:11 PM

Delay, as in sending them in the year they turned six rather than the year they turned five? No regrets here. DS will always be a bit behind socially due to his ASD, so starting FYOS as one of the oldest in the cohort was a good move.

#3 blueskies12

Posted 09 January 2020 - 09:18 PM

I'm interested in this also. I'm in QLD so my son was eligible for Prep this year (4 turning 5) and we are having him do Prep next year (5 turning 6). Now I read on the Old website that compulsory schooling has to have started by 6 years and 6 months.

#4 More cheese Gromit

Posted 09 January 2020 - 09:19 PM

No regrets here sent my DS at 6 he would have struggled socially had I sent him at 5

Are tossing up delaying starting school OP?

#5 Meemaw

Posted 09 January 2020 - 09:26 PM

No regrets here and I held all mine back as they were born in the last 3 months of the year. I was especially grateful I did so during the dreaded teenage years as they didn't seem to suffer from any of the peer pressure or poor decision making that some teenagers struggle with. I also think this helped when they were deciding on uni courses etc. as they were that bit more mature and really considered what was going to be best long term. This was possibly to do with their personality types I suppose but being the oldest in their cohort certainly hasn't harmed them.

#6 IamtheMumma

Posted 09 January 2020 - 09:33 PM

View PostMore cheese Gromit, on 09 January 2020 - 09:19 PM, said:

No regrets here sent my DS at 6 he would have struggled socially had I sent him at 5

Are tossing up delaying starting school OP?

Yes. After previously planning to send him, childcare thinks he'd benefit from another year of Kindy (QLD).

#7 More cheese Gromit

Posted 09 January 2020 - 10:15 PM

Kinder also suggested that DS repeat kinder.
How do you feel about delaying

#8 Bearynice

Posted 09 January 2020 - 10:16 PM

No regrets here. My kids were ready socially at 6. If I sent them at five they would have struggled.
6 they did well.

My sister has a child who started primary at 6 for social reasons. She said it was great going to high school. Her son adapted really well due to his age

#9 aace

Posted 09 January 2020 - 11:01 PM

I sent my daughter to prep (Vic) as she just turned 5. She was ready socially but really struggled academically. She re did prep at a different school and is now ahead of her peers. I regret sending her early and wish I kept her back.

#10 soapy

Posted 09 January 2020 - 11:58 PM

Best thing I did for my son. He would have started school at 4 but we kept him back and he started at 5. Not long after starting he turned 6. He was always quiet and struggled a lot with change. It was best for him to be the oldest instead of one of the youngest.

Edited by soapy, 09 January 2020 - 11:59 PM.


#11 Mrs Twit

Posted 10 January 2020 - 12:35 AM

We are happy with our decision to hold DD14 back. She turned 6 in April of her FYOS. Academically she would have been fine, but socially she would have struggled. I have seen nothing but advantages for her so far. Some of her friends are a whole year younger than her and there is quite a difference in maturity levels.

#12 gracie1978

Posted 10 January 2020 - 05:45 AM

It's such a hard decision.

My son turned five in September and he's so ready for FYOS.

He is doing a few weeks of daycare this month and he's much more mature than the kids in the room.

However he has a friend who is a few months younger, her parents are holding her back and I can totally see why.  Hope daycare and other people who know your child can provide some guidance.  Do they have any thoughts on it?  Have you done any transition days?

Finally I know a few people who regretted it.  Their kids were driving daycare nuts by about April.  One took them out halfway through the year for a road trip and the other ended up moving back to NZ so her son went straight to school over there.

#13 No girls here

Posted 10 January 2020 - 05:46 AM

No regrets for holding back DS3. Socially he needed that extra year.  I sent DS1 and DS2 early and I think I would have regretted holding them back (they're now 15 and 14) as they would have been bored.

WIth all three of my kids I went with what their day care suggested.  Fortunately that also lined up with my gut feeling for each of them.

#14 Caribou

Posted 10 January 2020 - 05:49 AM

Fwiw, DD was always going to struggle socially no matter whether we held her back or not. She’s now in yr 3 and caught up socially by the start of year 2. I sent her at 5 turning 6, but she’s a Dec baby so we had no say on when she went.

#15 Silverstreak

Posted 10 January 2020 - 06:00 AM

We're in Vic and DS was born after April, so I didn't get a choice and sent DS when he was five turning six, but if I'd had a choice I would have sent him that age anyway. He has ASD and limited verbal and social skills, so I was happy for him to go when he was a bit older.

We actually could have got permission to have him do a second year of kinder and send him six turning seven, but the kinder said he'd probably get more out of school by that point, particularly if it was a specialist school, which he ended up attending. I don't think it hurts to wait another year, if there are other issues at play.

#16 Bird1

Posted 10 January 2020 - 06:37 AM

Our kindy teacher told me that my son was not ready for prep that he would really struggle. I listened but then discussed it with friends.
I ignored the kindy teacher and sent my son to prep. He absolutely loved school, academically and socially. He would have been bored stupid doing another year of kindy.
So my advice is you know your child best, not the kindy teacher

#17 aluminium

Posted 10 January 2020 - 06:48 AM

I sent both my girls the year they turned 6 (April and June babies). No regrets or issues. I feel like it better positions them for Year 12 as they will be that little bit more mature.

I stressed about it unnecessarily. In Primary school it really doesn't matter. In Highschool, Pathways mean that if they need to be accelerated they can (true for Primary as well). I really dont think an extra year of play hurts.

#18 laridae

Posted 10 January 2020 - 07:00 AM

Starting school at 6 turning 7 that year would be quite a late start. I don't think it would be allowed in most states except with special circumstances. Most require kids in full time school the year they turn 6.
Starting school at 5 turning 6 that year would be quite fine and normal for most of Australia. Even if they turn 6 near the start of the year.

#19 newmumandexcited

Posted 10 January 2020 - 07:01 AM

I think it’s so up to the kid. My son is starting and just would kill everyone if he wasn’t going - he’s mad with boredom.

His cousin born two months later is no where near ready.

#20 Amica

Posted 10 January 2020 - 07:07 AM

Opppsite here. We were going to delay, I pushed for it. When my son started prep he didn't know letters, numbers, colours, animal sounds and more. He was significantly delayed and attended ECDP. The advice we got from the ECDP director, a PhD qualified education professional (apposed to kindy teachers) was that holding him back would be holding him back. I was advised the evidence and best practice does not support delayed entry, and further there is no social or academic requirement to starting prep apart from age, and to ignore all the 'prep ready' nonsense.

I reluctantly started him on time. He is grade 6 this year and I thank my lucky stars I didn't listen to kindy teachers and daycare staff. What a disservice I would have done him holding him back a year. Having him go through all his schooling as still the awkward delayed kid, but for it to be magnified by him being the tallest and oldest would have been awful.

#21 José

Posted 10 January 2020 - 07:18 AM

View Postlaridae, on 10 January 2020 - 07:00 AM, said:

Starting school at 6 turning 7 that year would be quite a late start. I don't think it would be allowed in most states except with special circumstances. Most require kids in full time school the year they turn 6.
Starting school at 5 turning 6 that year would be quite fine and normal for most of Australia. Even if they turn 6 near the start of the year.

Agree that it is quite late.
I looked at the Qld info and it looks like its up to parental discretion and that the child must be at school by 6 years 6 months.

#22 newmumandexcited

Posted 10 January 2020 - 07:18 AM

In our case, the kindy teachers also pushed to hold back. I’m a teacher myself so I kind of ignored them and I am so glad I did. Judge the child regardless of beliefs or common perceptions or even evidence.

#23 Jingleflea

Posted 10 January 2020 - 07:20 AM

I started DD at 5 turning 6, she was not ready any earlier and probably would have been fine at home another year frankly.

#24 José

Posted 10 January 2020 - 07:24 AM

This is just so individual.
Im not sure the experience of others on this forum is really going to help you know what's best in your individual and unique circumstances.
School readiness is hard to assess and actually some children are never 'School ready' and require supports at school.
Given you re considering starting your child the year they turn 7 What are the primary concerns? Are there any therapists e.g. speech or OT involved? What do they say? If no therapists involved and day care have concerns perhaps it's worth looking at getting some assessments and supports in place


#25 elly35

Posted 10 January 2020 - 07:32 AM

DD was 5 turning 6 in April. One of the top academically in her class each year but still challenged.  Has thrived. Socially she is doing well- about average or slightly under but would be struggling with an older cohort.




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