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How are you all coping?


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#1 newmumandexcited

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:13 PM

How are you guys all coping? I’m stuck in the house with my 3 year old twins and 5 year old, all boys, and my husband who it can be tense with - and I honestly don’t know how I can possibly handle this until potentially October.

I know far far worse is happening overseas but I wake up in complete despair - and the message of ‘bake a cake, enjoy a fort’ etc - makes things worse. That’s not life for many with little kids, when every action is loaded with tantrums, arguments, fights and screaming.

How are you coping with this? My eldest went to school and my twins to preschool, and it feels like I had a glimpse of a freedom of sorts for a second. I know it’s nothing in the scheme of things, but I feel so sad it’s lost. I can’t even escape the twins by having my mother look after them for an hour.

Edited by newmumandexcited, 06 April 2020 - 02:15 PM.


#2 Silverstreak

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:21 PM

I'm feeling a bit flat, to be honest. Just had some orange juice and some musk sticks lol. We're about to go for a walk, that should perk me up for a bit.

Will feel a bit happier once we've done a tidy and passed our rental inspection (just emailing photos this time around, which I think is very sensible of the REA.)

#3 Kallie88

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:28 PM

I'm exhausted more than anything. 4yo wants to go out, 2yo is just at that feral age where he's always getting into mischief anytime you take your eyes off him, 18mo is pretty good, but needs to stop screaming if his brother or sister come too close everytime he's got something 🙄 being pregnant as well just means everything feels like it takes more time and effort than usual and I wish I had a second pair of hands. I miss dh who still has to go in to work

#4 newmumandexcited

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:33 PM

View PostKallie88, on 06 April 2020 - 02:28 PM, said:

I'm exhausted more than anything. 4yo wants to go out, 2yo is just at that feral age where he's always getting into mischief anytime you take your eyes off him, 18mo is pretty good, but needs to stop screaming if his brother or sister come too close everytime he's got something 🙄 being pregnant as well just means everything feels like it takes more time and effort than usual and I wish I had a second pair of hands. I miss dh who still has to go in to work

Jeez you make me feel like such a complainer. That sounds really hard. How do you get through the day - what’s your philosophy? I keep thinking it won’t be forever..

#5 Veritas Vinum Arte

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:33 PM

I am flat too. I resigned from my job back in January but worked a long notice period so didn’t finish up to last Friday in March. (Yes now in retrospect not a great move as DHs income decreases). I have had 1 week at home and now remember why I was so excited for my job. Being at home drives me mad. Unfortunately I found full time work for me with 3 kids didn’t work.

Kids remote schooled last 2 weeks of term (which was hard with me working), and now DH is WFH too.

I think I am going to go crazy.... and my kids are 10/12/14yrs. If my kids were your kids ages I think I would already be in a padded cell.

Be kind to yourself. Take it one moment at a time.

Edited by Veritas Vinum Arte, 06 April 2020 - 02:35 PM.


#6 SM3s Fight Song

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:36 PM

View Postnewmumandexcited, on 06 April 2020 - 02:13 PM, said:

How are you guys all coping? I’m stuck in the house with my 3 year old twins and 5 year old, all boys, and my husband who it can be tense with - and I honestly don’t know how I can possibly handle this until potentially October.

I know far far worse is happening overseas but I wake up in complete despair - and the message of ‘bake a cake, enjoy a fort’ etc - makes things worse. That’s not life for many with little kids, when every action is loaded with tantrums, arguments, fights and screaming.

How are you coping with this? My eldest went to school and my twins to preschool, and it feels like I had a glimpse of a freedom of sorts for a second. I know it’s nothing in the scheme of things, but I feel so sad it’s lost. I can’t even escape the twins by having my mother look after them for an hour.

Very similar here.  1st year I'd started to get a little peace and quiet in 7 years.  Kids are 7, 5 and 3.  Youngest just started at playschool in February, two short days a week.  Thought I would get to rest this year and stop getting sicker.  Now there's 5 of us at home, and Im trying to home school 2 kids and organise the supports ds1 needs to start fyos next year while DH is WFH very noisily.  No idea how I'm going to make it through this right now.

Edited by SM3s Fight Song, 06 April 2020 - 02:41 PM.


#7 22Fruitmincepies

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:40 PM

The end of last week was pretty rough, having the weekend with DH doing most of the child supervision saved me. I have a 2yo and a 5yo and unless they have a screen each, it’s just so loud all the time. There are screams of fun and screams of anger, things being knocked over, loud talking, and they seem to need my attention every 2 minutes. It’s relentless and draining as well as being very boring and frustrating at how little I can get done.

#8 suzyr

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:44 PM

Yeah, not too bad although one day last week I was very flat.  It is just my 16 year old daughter and I at home.  My husband works in Romania managing grain farms.  He has been there for 4 weeks now.  Due home first week of June but that won't be happenning.  That is the most unsettling part of all this.  Even when the restrictions are lifted will he be allowed back into the country?  When he does come home during the year it is for 2 week stints....at this stage pointless as he would spend the two weeks in a hotel in quarantine.  I just have to take one day at a time and hope this crazy world gets back to normal sooner rather than later.  On a positive note...he does have a job and is getting paid.


#9 Kallie88

Posted 06 April 2020 - 02:44 PM

View Postnewmumandexcited, on 06 April 2020 - 02:33 PM, said:



Jeez you make me feel like such a complainer. That sounds really hard. How do you get through the day - what’s your philosophy? I keep thinking it won’t be forever..

Oh don't feel that way at all, the thought of 3yo twins gives me the shudders lol (obviously not trying to be offensive, just not in my realm of experience, one 3yo at a time is full on!). I think whatever combination of kids you have being stuck together all the time is super hard for most!

Mostly I'm just trying to do one day at a time. Trying not to think too far ahead unless it's too something good, like dh is taking thursday off so I'll get a 5 day not solo break. Taking whatever shortcuts I can and not feeling bad for saying no to things that are just beyond me (like making mountains out of pillows and mattresses which daddy did yesterday- sorry guys i know you had great fun but that's gonna be a daddy game till after belly bub comes in august lol)

#10 Fluffy Potatoes

Posted 06 April 2020 - 04:30 PM

Sounds like everyone’s having as much fun as I am. We have a 7yr old and 20mth old and they fight so much. The youngest screams every time his brother looks at him and attacks his brother every time he’s not and the big boy retaliates accordingly.

I spend my days yelling ’leave your brother alone!’ and preparing/cleaning up the copious amounts of food they’re eating.

On the flip side I’m doing less washing because nobody wears clothes anymore.

#11 Lime-Polka-Dot

Posted 06 April 2020 - 04:40 PM

Staying home and staying safe are the least of my worries right now.

I don't know what will happen next week if school and my work are open, I don't know what to do.

I don't know what will happen with my ex and possible legal implications (it's a long story).

In some ways it would be easier if my mother and I weren't living together atm (waiting for her house to be built, she's almost 72 so vulnerable if we are out and about then return home).

#12 amdirel

Posted 06 April 2020 - 04:47 PM

I'm basically fine Mon-thurs, when I'm at work! Fri-sun is a bit more mentally exhausting, so I take myself for a long walk (1hr+) and ring a verbacious friend while I walk, it's almost like having a catchup over coffee like we used to.

#13 Soontobegran

Posted 06 April 2020 - 04:48 PM

If you had asked me this question as a SAHM for 5 under school age children I think I would have felt like so many of you......completely under the pump but right now I would give anything for some noise and some company.

The quiet and loneliness is having a negative effect on my MH and is triggering me with memories of enforced isolation caused by hospital stays post accident.

Anyway......there is an end to this, I just have to think to the future.

Thinking of all of you really. None of us are enjoying this really.

#14 Acidulous Osprey

Posted 06 April 2020 - 04:52 PM

At home with an autistic and II 22yo whose world has fallen apart.  Today they announced the EKKA is cancelled for this year and he is devastated.  Fortunately I found showbags for sale online so when he is at the peak of his upset we will buy him a couple.

DH and I are used to being at home fulltime in each other's company so that's not too difficult.  Missing his support workers

#15 Freddie'sMum

Posted 06 April 2020 - 04:57 PM

Not good.  I am not coping very well at all.

#16 franklymum

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:03 PM

I'm coping ok but a large part of that is because I'm still working as an aged care nurse so I'm actually getting out and seeing how hard it is for others which which gives me a bit of perspective. Have two primary aged children I leave a school schedule and lunch boxes for every morning and they have been amazing which is kind of miraculous and I'm so very grateful. I am, however, trying not to assume their attitude is going to last into next term.

The 7 year old has activities for each half hour and my older daughter sets the alarm bell to ring for start of school, lunch and recess. The older one does a mixture of this plus online work from school. I get home after 3 and they are always happy when I walk through the door which is amazing because they're pretty much on their own - my husband is in another room glued to his laptop working.

Honestly, I'm so lucky and I realise it isn't this easy for everyone - I tell my girls everyday how proud I am of how well they're handling everything. I have comforted a lot of my older clients this week who are pretty devastated because they're not seeing their children and grandchildren, being able to go to church or do all the usual activities in the village. It's particularly hard for those who have recently lost their spouse.

I know it's hopelessly old fashioned to say so but I really liked the Queens speech.

#17 franklymum

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:09 PM

View PostAcidulous Osprey, on 06 April 2020 - 04:52 PM, said:

  Missing his support workers

I can imagine. I'm sorry - that can't be easy.

#18 22Fruitmincepies

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:15 PM

I’ve put myself in time out. Highly recommended! 2yo has the iPad so will hopefully be zombified sufficiently to stop him climbing stuff.

#19 annodam

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:16 PM

I'm a SAHM & to be honest my life has been simpler.
Less laundry & no ferrying the kids about to School & Sports.

#20 PrincessPeach

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:19 PM

Have you got any outside yard?

The only way I'm able to stay sane is sending both kids outside for an hour or so. As for the days with forcasted rain - i forsee a lot of TV.

I've only got 2, they are almost 4 & almost 6, so that fractionally older makes self entertainment a bit easier to do.

#21 alchetta

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:19 PM

I'm on a rollercoaster. In and of myself it's fine. Dealing with the marriage is mostly difficult. So I go up and down.

#22 Lucrezia Bauble

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:19 PM

i’m not coping.

it’s all just sh*t and there’s nothing to look forward to.


#23 Rummonkey

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:30 PM

Wine.

#24 newmumandexcited

Posted 06 April 2020 - 05:41 PM

View PostSoontobegran, on 06 April 2020 - 04:48 PM, said:

If you had asked me this question as a SAHM for 5 under school age children I think I would have felt like so many of you......completely under the pump but right now I would give anything for some noise and some company.

The quiet and loneliness is having a negative effect on my MH and is triggering me with memories of enforced isolation caused by hospital stays post accident.

Anyway......there is an end to this, I just have to think to the future.

Thinking of all of you really. None of us are enjoying this really.

It’s so funny isn’t it - I would do anything to be alone. Hope things look up for us all and take care xx

#25 RichardParker

Posted 06 April 2020 - 07:41 PM

I go up and down.  Dh and I take turns in melting down.  Then one of us gets up and pours wine.  I'm already "broken in" to working and staying at home with SN kids, so half the work is done there, but the economic uncertainty is really tricky to navigate, mentally.

I'm finally starting to understand my Father, who was born in 1933 and spent 7 years of his childhood in immigration detention.  I just want to get some land, some cattle, build a house and stay home for the next 50 years.

Edited by RichardParker, 06 April 2020 - 07:43 PM.





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