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Dad's delivering, accident or planned

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#1 Shoshoi

Posted 09 March 2006 - 11:46 PM

Hi there - this is kind of similar to Leesa's question about who has had an 'accidental' homebirth...

But what I'm really interested in is in the case of these 'accidents', how the male partners coped and what role they played in the delivery.

My sister (who was my doula for my first bubs) lives a few hours drive away and she's just informed me that, judging by the time it took me to give birth to our fist bub, I should a. prepare for her not being able to make it to the hospital in time and ...
b. prepare to not make it to the hospital in time myself!

So, she wants Dh and I to read up on homebirthing, and particularly wants him to have a plan of what he should do 'just in case'.

I told my Dh and he's totally in denial (he said - you didn't go that quickly the first time)...it took 4 hours to go from waters intact and 3cm dilation to being fully dilated and given birth to a 9 pounder.

The thing that bothers me, other than having a freaked out DH, is the possibility of birthing alone, or with only my toddler present.

So, I'm after all the wisdom you can provide for my worst case scenario so that it won't be, in reality, worst case if it happens!

#2 Guest_toppy_*

Posted 10 March 2006 - 12:13 AM

My first labour was 12 hours my 2nd 4 hours and my last was 1 hour 40 from 1st contraction to delivery.

I rang DH after 1st contraction and he came home, we drove straight to the hospital where he dropped me off on my own, he the dropped the kids off and came back in time for delivery,

My advice is to leave asap from 1st contraction.

#3 ~kylie~

Posted 10 March 2006 - 05:05 AM

Hey, why not just plan a homebirth anyway.. that's how I convinced my DH as I have fast labours. wink.gif

What if you caught the baby yourself, instead of DH?

#4 sebela

Posted 10 March 2006 - 07:29 AM

The other thing to keep in mind if labour goes that quickly it quite likely to go well for you and baby. If it happens that fast that you are alone there is no need to cut the cord or anything, just keep yourself and bubs together and warm and wait for help if you don't know what else to do.

#5 JicyJac

Posted 10 March 2006 - 12:04 PM

I think it is important to note that a planned home birth is quite a different birth to an un-planned homebirth where you just don't make it to the hospital in time.

I think the planning and support is key.  Families/women planning a homebirth generally hire a midwife, and make all sorts of practical and emotional (very important) preparations.  So even if the midwife doesn't arrive on time because it is a quick labour, they have everything else ready - and critically the partner or support people have probably spent some time preparing themselves for the fact they have a big role to play in the birth - which may include being the only one there "catching the baby"

So after all that waffle my point is:  I agree with Kylie, you should PLAN a homebirth, don't just "read up on homebirth" PLAN a homebirth, hire a midwife (who hopefully lives nearby), get the house ready, help your husband and sister prepare for supporting you at home.  You will find planning it so much less stressful than the thought of being caught out birthing at home with out assistance because your husband is not there - or because he is panicking and therefore not much use.  I must admit my husband always took the homebirth in his stride from the begining (probably helped that I raised it before I was even pregnant) but he really enjoyed the experiece.

I haven't birthed in hospital, so I can't compare but I only have positive things to say about my homebirth experience.  There are a growing handful of us here that can give you advise on planning a homebirth.  Good-luck


#6 bloss

Posted 10 March 2006 - 12:22 PM

That's how I convinced my DH about Homebirth too biggrin.gif  Quick labour here! I'll have my mum here just in case the midwife doesnt  make it, but she's only 20 mins away and will come when I need her.

You will find a lot of support planning a homebirth here, but I do understand if you prefer hospital.... you really need to work out a birth plan in both cases. Try and have some stuff ready at home just in case....

I remember you from the Tassie forum and live quite closeby. There are some wonderful midwives also nearby who can help/give advice. If I can help in any way, let me know!!  


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