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Pet Loss Grief Support
78 replies to this topic
Posted 13 December 2006 - 02:32 PM
As many would know the loss of a pet can be totally heartbreaking, and can take a long time to get over. To many of us pets are not just furry companions, but are like members of our own family, they can be the ones we talk to when no one else will listen and they give unconditional love.
Here are two sites that are great for pet Loss. I hope that they help anyone who is grieving the loss of a beloved pet.
http://www.petloss.com/ (this is my favorite)
Posted 15 December 2006 - 06:09 AM
What a great idea. Thanks, Puss. I went to petloss.com I think when my own cat died last year.
The thing I found hardest about it was that the loss was quite invisible to others (unless of course they knew me well). Some people even laughed in an embarrassed way when I told them I was grieving the death of my cat. To me, that shows that many people don't understand that kind of grief and don't know how to cope with people who are going through it. It certainly helps to have like-minded individuals to share thoughts and feelings with.
When my cat died, I was really touched by the cards and floral tributes sent by friends and family who also knew Pusster and loved him. It meant a lot to me that they understood and cared enough to send flowers as one would if a person had died.
Posted 26 March 2007 - 05:01 PM
I have just been reading over these posts and would like to thank both posters for posting them.
It is often thought when you lose a very much loved pet, that people should just move on but for many people these are classed as family or children in a way.
Posted 26 May 2007 - 03:03 PM
Thankyou for those links, here is some of my story, I am still too sad to reply further
Posted 22 January 2008 - 10:59 AM
Did any of you hear about that shocking/tragic story about the greyhound called Go-Bronco who was left in a swelting car and struggled to survive only to die 3 days later. It was in Sydney. I cannot stop crying. My tears for Go-Bronco have turned into acid-rage for his trainer, Terry Darragh, he has reportedly been charged with animal cruelty. I am devastated as are all the people around me. The case goes to Balmain Court on 13th February where Terry Darragh is facing charges for animal cruelty, driving offences and making a false statement to police hence being a public nuisance. I can't stop thinking about the excruciating pain that poor dog went through alone and caged in the back of the station wagon with no water. I pray for sweet Justice for Go-Bronco...
Posted 14 February 2008 - 09:00 AM
Thanks for those links.
Our 10 yr old cat died Tuesday morning she was bitten by a snake and we are trying to help our 3.5 yr old twin girls understand. They haven't slept very well since. It's so unfair to watch them hurt like this, not to mention our own grief.
Edited by KLJCS, 14 February 2008 - 09:02 AM.
Posted 14 February 2008 - 10:00 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss:-(. We lost our beloved 10 year old dog, Pepe, Christmas eve due to cancer. Our son is almost three and he grieved and is still grieving the loss of our beloved dog. We told him that Pepe is now a star in the night sky and is watching over us. While i don't think he understands the concept of death, and rather than try to explain this to him, we thought it more appropriate for his age to try to get across a concept of transformation, hence the star. It is heartbreaking for us when he says he wants the Pepe star to come out or he says he wants to go in a spaceship to the Pepe star. When he looks sad as he says this we say to him: "we miss Pepe"" and he says: I miss Pepe too'. Sometimes he sees photos of Pepe and he says : "there's Pepe" and we tell him again that Pepe is now a star. For about a month after our Pepe passed, he would ask where Pepe was when we got home, and we just kept saying that we miss Pepe and he is now a star.
We grieve for our beloved dog, a spritely tenterfield terrier, so much, and i have gone from having a little cry almost every day to once or twice a week. We acknowledge our grief, but we find it terribly sad that some of our family members find it hard to even say that they are sorry for our loss, or that once they say they are sorry, never mention it again.Unfortunately our grief is a silent family affair. I found a beautiful poem that encapsulated part of how we feel:
"Our hearts still ache in sadness,
and secret tears stll flow,
what it meant to lose you,
no one will ever know".
Perhaps we could start a little memorial site here where we post a photo of our beloved passed pets and say a little bit about their life and what they meant to us?
Posted 15 February 2008 - 10:46 AM
Thanks for replying Rebeca. I'm sorry about the loss of your dog.
Yesterday the girls kept sitting on her favourite chair out on the verandah and talking about her which is sad but good. Here is a pic of our playful Tortoiseshell
Edited by KLJCS, 15 February 2008 - 10:54 AM.
Posted 18 February 2008 - 12:44 PM
What a lovely looking cat she was- love the colours.It's nice that your daughters are already able to share their memories of their beloved cat:-).
I tried for ages last night to upload a photo of our Pepe, but eventually gave up.
Anyway thanks for your reply and best wishes for going through the mourning process- I know it does get better:-).
Posted 10 December 2008 - 11:50 AM
I am grieving my Charlie who died Monday 8/12/2008. I feel stupid getting so upset over my baby but he was so young 7 months and so healthy. Why should a perfectly healthy beautiful dog just have his heart stop under GA getting xrays. Please forgive my rambling but I am really struggling with the loss of charlie.
RIP MY BABY CHARLIE RIP ALL THE WASHING OFF THE LINES IN HEAVEN YOU WISH.
07/05/2008 - 08/12/2008
Posted 13 December 2008 - 11:09 PM
Our cat died last month. She was elderly and had been on her 'last legs' for a while, but our whole family still feels upset. I feel sorry for our other cat too, and I think he is grieving also. The two cats would groom each other, and slept together etc . I keep thinking he is probably looking for her (well he was the first few days I know - and now he doesn't know where she is ).
I definitely want to get another cat, but I'm not sure when I'll be ready to iykwim.
Posted 19 December 2008 - 11:12 PM
That is so not fair that such a young dog can die under GA.
My dog died today due to a complication with the GA while she was getting xrays done also, it paralyzed her so they had to put her down . She was 12. I don't understand it either and feel so confused, hurt and angry tonight. I just can't sleep.
Edited by ~SnowGlobe~, 19 December 2008 - 11:14 PM.
Posted 20 December 2008 - 12:03 PM
Snowglobe I have sent you a PM. I am so sorry for your loss.
Posted 02 January 2009 - 08:22 AM
I am so sorry to hear about PP's loss of pets. I can understand how you are feeling as recently we lost our 15 year old dog (who I have had for half my life), and also a new addition to the family whose life was way too short.
I just don't understand what cruel lesson our family could possibly learn from this...
VERY recently we adopted a 12 month old female, maltese x sh*tzu dog from the Animal Welfare. She was the perfect dog to join our family. She was affectionate, loved the kids, followed me around, loved sitting on my knee when I was on the computer (so I knew she would be great company for me when I studied this year). She loved to be brushed, she was already toilet trained inside, and she would sit on command, so obviously her previous owners had cared for her and spent time on her. But they dumped two dogs, a male and female, so that when she was desexed she was 3 weeks away from giving birth (I am so angry at her previous owners).
We had only lost our 15 year old dog 2 months ago, and I said then I couldn't handle another dog cause it hurts too much, but I relented when I saw our other dog "crying" the weeks after our other dog passed away. I didn't know they could cry but she definately was. So I thought we could save a dog from the Animal Welfare and that it would be a good thing to do. We fell in love with Tessa straight away. They have to remain at the animal shelter for 8 days to allow the previous owners to change their mind. I went to visit her (30 mins away) every 2nd day, and rang on the other days. When I was told she was finally ours and that she would be desexed the next day I went out and bought her a new collar, bed and food. I couldn't sleep for 3 days prior cause I was so excited she was "coming home." She fitted straight into our family perfectly. I spoilt her rotten cause I thought it was so awful when I found out she had been due to have puppies and that they took them away (I was only told afterwards).
I had grand plans of giving her an awesome life, but she never got the chance. Tessa showed obvious signs of kennel cough 3 days after we bought her home. They put her on AB's but we were back at the vets 2 days later and they put her on stronger AB's as she stopped eating & drinking. I could only get water into her by putting a syringe into her mouth. 2 days later she still wasn't improving so they kept her and put her on a drip. I received the phone call New Years Day to be told that she had passed away during the night.
Kennel cough is a common, contagious dog illness that is similar to human flu. They are usually vaccinated against it, but it can constantly mutate so that even vaccinated dogs can get a mild dose, causing them to get a "hacking cough" that passes within 2-3 days. However dogs that aren't vaccinated and whose immunity is suppressed (obviously Tessa with her desexing op & losing her pups 3 weeks off giving birth), can develop secondary problems such as pneumonia and respiratory problems.
Sorry if this story doesn't flow and is hard to read, this is still VERY fresh. I feel like I have a ton of bricks on my chest and I feel so sad. I could have written this post as a vent against irresponsible pet owners who fail to vaccinate and desex their animals, but there is no point.
We only had her for such a short time, but I feel priviledged to have known "Tessa".
Posted 02 January 2009 - 09:40 AM
Oh Leah, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of Tessa. She would have been so spoilt living with you and your family. Thinking of you and your family. Fly free Tessa.
Posted 24 March 2009 - 09:39 PM
My story is really long and involved but basically I had to put my adored 5yo burmese neuter down because of redirected aggression issues to his sister. I had already given away his brother in hope the situation would improve, but it didn't and in the end, I had to make a choice. Rehome my girl or put to sleep my boy (I couldn't risk rehoming him).
Every day I think about him and grieve him. Everyday I feel massive guilt that I did the wrong thing. That I acted too quickly (even though we'd lived with this for 12 monhts). Everyday I wish I had the choice again and might have acted differently.
How the hell do I ever forgive myself for what I have done. I miss him so terribly but the I think the guilt is worse than missing him.
It sounds stupid but he was my feline soul mate - I've never had a bond with an animal like I did with him....
It's been almost a year and I still feel this way. I wish every day he were here and I hate myself for what I did...
Posted 21 June 2009 - 06:18 PM
Hi, My dog Zues died on my daughters 5th birthday party last week.
Zues was my 21st birthday present from my boyfriend (now hubby) DH and I had been only together for a matter of months before we got Zues. Its really strange without him now. Zues watched us get marred and have both our kids. I have never seen a nasty bone in his body, and was perfect friend in the backyard for DD.
3 months ago Zuey was found with a large internal lump, which contained cancer. My darling dog never had a chance. He loved fetching, and didnt stop fetching untill the day he had to be put down.
He was a great all rounder Zues, and our whole family misses him badly. We where lucky to have know such a great dog. xxx
Zuey and Jake. 3 weeks before he died on the 13th June.
Edited by tara-and-jakes-mummy, 21 June 2009 - 06:20 PM.
Posted 22 July 2009 - 10:39 AM
I lost my beautiful cat, Monster, on Monday. She was a few months short of 18. She started life in the worst way - her litter was dumped in a bag at the rubbish tip at about 4 weeks old. My friend's mother found the litter and hand-reared them until they were old enough to go to new homes. I got one for my boyfriend (now husband) for his Christmas present. He was away when I got her, and when I was talking to him on the phone one night she was climbing all over me, and I said something to her. When he asked who I was talking to, I said "just a little monster", and that was how she got her name.
Over the years, she has moved house with us 5 times; gone to live interstate for a few months while we travelled overseas; seen us married and add 2 children and a dog to our family....and, for awhile, another cat as well. She survived a major leg injury at the age of 8 which required 2 lots of surgery.
She was a cantankerous thing, even from a young age. You could pat her gently, or scratch behind the ears, but other than that, forget about affection. No cuddling up on your lap watching tv, or sleeping on your bed; and definately no cuddles for more than 30 seconds. Yet, somehow, she really left an impression on people. Her vets over the years, especially, have always had a special place in their hearts for her...despite the snarls and scratches lol. She really was just so dignified and full of self respect, commanding the utmost respect from all (esp. the dog and children!)
I had been thinking over the last few weeks that she wasn't looking great, and that I should take her to the vet, but was nothing specific, so just hadn't gotten around to it. Towards the end of last week, she wasn't eating...but for her to go a few days without touching her dinner wasn't unheard of for her ("like, you expect me to eat that crap?") But on Saturday I cooked her some fresh salmon, and she didn't even eat that. That night, she kept me awake most of the night, pacing the house, and making the most moarnful sounds. By morning, we noticed her back legs were really weak too. DH picked her up and cuddled her for ages so we knew something was very wrong. We got her to the vet as soon as we could. The vet said she was severely dehydrated (she had been drinking plenty of water) and suspected kidney problems. We left her there to go on a drip and have blood tests. Later on the vet phoned to say that she was in acute renal failure, and had severe anemia. The vet wanted to try and rehydrate her and reaccess in the morning. The family went up to see her incase she didn't make it through the night.
The next morning the vet phoned to tell us that Monster was a lot worse, and was not going to get better. We agreed to put her to sleep. DH took our 5 year old to say goodbye on her way to school, then when he got back, we went up to the vet. The vet brought her in, all bundled up like a baby as her temp was way down, and had a chat then left us to say goodbye while she got ready. It was lovely to be able to give Monster a big cuddle, though I couldn't halp but think she was probably hating every minute of it, but didn't have the energy to protest! As the vet started to put the green medicine into her line, Monster gave a snarl. DH and I were laughing and crying all at once. Monster just had to get the last word in and tell the vet off.
We brought her home and have buried her under the macadamia tree where she will enjoy the morning sun for eternity. I am still feeling so numb and just so incredibly sad. I will always love her and miss her.
Posted 06 October 2009 - 09:15 PM
I just said goodbye to my beautiful 15 year old Kelpie, I got her when she was just a pup.
Digger I am going to miss you so much, my heart is aching right now
Posted 28 October 2009 - 09:40 PM
I'm in pain today as our beautiful 11 year old German Shepard died from a stupid tick we took him to the vet on Monday as he was paralyzed. We took him home after a needle and then yesterday seemed ok even though he still couldn't move. The vet said it should only take a couple of days for him to get back up but he died over night. I feel so bad that he died like that and he was outside by himself as he couldn't control his bladder. I don't handle grief very well and the kids are devastated too.
We love you Shadow and miss you already 1998-2009.
Posted 01 December 2009 - 01:21 AM
jotana our stories are similar.
I awoke to find our dearly loved 12 yr old Chihuahua collapsed on the floor and struggling to breathe his tongue was all the way out of his mouth and it was a bluish colour.
Dp rushed him to the vet where upon arrival his tongue was a bright blue and appeared he was not breathing.
All 3 vets at the practice worked on him straight away gave oxygen and the anti viral medication and sedated him to try and give him a chance.
That afternoon we rang and was told he had started to wake up but it is touch and go if he survived the night it would be a surprise.
The next morning we received the news that has absolutely shattered us that our gorgeous boy has gone to the rainbow.
He did survive the night but passed away at 7am that morning.
I can't seem to function at all. I am constantly seeing his limp body and him struggling to breathe every time i try and close my eyes.
I have gone over and over the night before were i did hear some strange noises coming from the laundry ( were our dogs sleep ) i checked on the numerous times through the night i just thought it was our younger dog annoying him.
I am blaming myself for not noticing the signs which now after reading all the information about Paralysis ticks seems our boy was displaying the night before i found him.
Our younger Chihuahua is fretting for him, DP is dealing with it the best way he knows how which is being extremely quite and i can't stop crying.
RIP George Until we meet again mate
We you so very much.
Posted 13 December 2009 - 10:01 AM
I lost my beautiful little girl (cat) on Thursday afternoon. She was killed by a neighbour's dog who had gotten out.
I miss her. My chest hurts from missing her. And I'm still in shock that it happened at all. I never thought I'd see my girl taken in such a brutal way.
Posted 14 December 2009 - 08:13 AM
I lost my dear 12 year old boxer last night, he was a gift from my parents for my 18th birthday & was the best friend I could have through my late teens & twenties. I loved him so deeply
Just 3 months ago he & we lost his 10yr old companion due to bladder cancer & he was just never the same after we had to have her put to sleep, he missed her dearly & I do believe that he held out so long to be with her & us.
My little guy was suffering from cancer, the mass had gotten so big that it was obstructing his bladder & bowel & he no longer could or wanted to eat.
The vet last night said that we could try surgery to remove the mass (or most of it that was causing his blocked bladder but I just knew that it would be cruel to put him through major surgery & ongoing treatments to extend his life by maybe a few short months, he was very old (especially for a boxer) & I knew he had had enough & wanted to be in peace with his companion
I miss him already so much & hope he knows that although at times he didn't receive as much attention as he should of that I really really did love him & he was very precious to me.
RIP Bodie my little guy - 16/12/97 - 13/12/09
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