Edited by need~rain, 10 October 2008 - 02:50 PM.
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Please Give Me Urgent Advice
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Posted 18 August 2007 - 05:59 PM
I feel sick reading that, so I can only imagine how you are feeling . What else has happened in that room when you aren't there . Good luck in taking this further and I hope the child abuser looses her job. Maybe she will think twice about treating poor defenceless children like that .
Edited by kim24, 18 August 2007 - 06:00 PM.
Posted 18 August 2007 - 06:03 PM
I would say the director already knows the situation from the Carer ..... I know if something big happened at our center then we always called the Director to inform her no matter when it was. This way they were prepared for when they came in the next day or Monday. We also had our HO peoples mobile numbers as well so we would call them too.
Posted 18 August 2007 - 10:24 PM
So sorry to hear about this sad episode, but thank goodness you were on hand to catch it and do something about it... You mentioned DS was too young to understand an explanation about what happened. I just wanted to say that you may be surprised at the level of understanding kids have. I know my DS understands far more than he can actually communicate at 3 yrs of age. If you have to bring up the horrible incident again it might help to explain to DS that what the teacher and those boys did were wrong - and that if anything bad happens, he should always tell you or tell someone like another teacher... I know it might sound like a big ask for a little boy but it may help teach him what to do when people do bad things to him.
I'm glad you're doing all you can to make sure this woman never has anything to do with children again. As you can see everyone here backs you 100%. Take care and good luck.
Posted 18 August 2007 - 11:38 PM
This is absolutely appalling and sickening.
Agreeing with the PP's about taking it to all relevant authorities.
Another thought I did have though, was making sure the parents of the other children were notified. As much as I would be horrified if this was done to my child, I would also be disgusted and wish to be notified if my children were being encouraged to discipline another.
At age 5 these boys are so impressionable and are being sent such mixed messages from this 'carer' as to what is and isn't acceptable behaviour. If it was my child being 'egged on' and taught that this is acceptable, I'd certainly want to know about it. Ideally, you'll gain some backing and support from them through your complaint process if they turn out to be just as appalled.
Wishing you all the very best of luck!
Edited by SleepyJean, 18 August 2007 - 11:44 PM.
Posted 19 August 2007 - 10:17 PM
Just wanted to say ...... good luck for tomorrow, hope you get some answers
Posted 19 August 2007 - 10:44 PM
I agree with what PP have said. My concern also was of what time it was, and the fact that children were still outside in the cold and dark. This i hope you have mentioned in your letter also. You son has suffered physical, mental, emotional and verbal abuse, and for a child who has just turned 3 I think it is totally unacceptable for him to even understand to the full extent what she was going on about. So what he may have pushed another child but that does not justify the treatment he has received. I would be ropeable if my almost 3 year old was treated like this.
Write the letter and CC it to all the relevant authorities being
*ABC head office
*Dept of community services
* I would be making a preliminary statement to the police
* and to anyone else who may need this information
This woman and also the aide should be sacked and disciplined. The aide also has a duty of care to the children yet she stood by and let it happen. They have both breached their duty of care when it comes to these children, 1. having them outdoors at that time and 2. the abuse that was allowed and encouraged.
I dont want to imagine how far this would have gone if you hadnt walked in at the time you did. Good Luck tomorrow
Posted 19 August 2007 - 11:09 PM
When I read this I felt sick to my stomach. What your poor beautiful boy must have gone through brings tears to my eyes.
I say bugger complaining to ABC themselves and go straight to the police or a lawyer. As far as I'm concerned, this is assault.
Not only that, but the poor boys who did the dirty work will probably end up suffering too.
Please do not let them get away with this.
Best of luck and I hope they get what they deserve.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 10:56 AM
Just wanted to say am thinking of you and hope you get some answers today, and have also been sending lots of hugs your DS's way!! I dropped my DS off at CC today and now want to go an check on him.
Just wanted to say that my DH is a Police officer, we are in VIC, but I told him about what happened to your little boy and he said he would def take it to the police, and charge her with assult.
Also, not sure if its the same in Qld, but in VIC, we have to have a 'Working with Kids' check if we come into any contact with children in our jobs, if Qld has this, make sure she gets a black mark against her name, hopefully then she will not be able to work with children. Googled the info for you, here is the website, you can contact them directly and report her, http://www.childcomm.qld.gov.au/employment/contact.html.
Honestly, I would have been charged with assult myself, if I saw that happening to my son, I would have slepped that teacher and pushed her down. Take this as far as you can, you have all the support we can offer!!
Posted 20 August 2007 - 11:06 AM
Hello, Well it has been an awful weekend waiting till today. I rang my centre at 6.30 am, 8.30am, 9am and finally at 9.30am the director was there. unfortunately that call was answered by the lady who abused my little boy and it was awful for me just knowing that it was her on the end while she spent a good few minutes searching for the director. I nearly hung up when I heard her voice.
I asked the director what was happening about the incident involving my son as i am sure she had a report from the teachers. She just seemed a little suprised and said oh yes your boy was pushing and............OH in hindsight I wish i hadnt jumped in here but I did because i would have liked to have heard more of what they wrote. It seems that it must have been far from the truth and they are definitely protecting each other as the director seemed more than a little shocked when i told her what was actually happening ewhen i arrived. She said she will contact her area manager and I emailed her through my report. ABC head office had not contacted me despite my urgent email request so at 10.15am I also called them and spoke with a lady who was really nice and was horrified with what i told her. she was going to get someone also to ring me back.
This is very difficult for me being a quiet, resevered person i have trouble standing up for myself at the best of times. I think this is going to get very nasty now the teachers it seems arent going to admit what they were doing, its a case of my word against theres as my little boy is unable to help himself with his level of communication.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 11:24 AM
I am horrified with what has happened to your child. QLD has the Working with Children check or Blue Card, she should definately be blacklisted. In my 10+ years in CC I have never heard of someone blatantly abusing a child in front of children, staff and unltimately the parent.
Were their any other parents in the centre at the time? Any parents who had picked their child up in the previous 10 mins who can verify that the said Teacher and Aide were outside with your son and the other children?
It is disgusting that the staff have not told the entire truth to the director but then what else would you expect (unfortunately they will buddy up and try and make it go away), I would make sure that they know that the Aide has said "sorry" as she obviously knows what happened was totally uncalled for and in breach of the "Duty of Care" that every childcare worker has to adhere to.
As other PP have said I would take this to the highest level possible - the police, DoCS, ABC Head Office, maybe so far as to contact your local Newspaper, TV station and offer them your story.
I would even send a copies to the current Government Minister reasonsible for this area:
The Department of Families, Community Services and Indigenous Affairs - Minister Mal Brough
Contact details - Parliament House in Canberra:
Ph: (02) 6277 7560
Fax: (02) 6273 4122
110 Morayfield Road (PO Box 1883) Caboolture Qld 4510
Ph: (07) 5495 6290
Fax: (07) 5498 3307
by email: firstname.lastname@example.org
The Department of Families, Community Services and Indigenous Affairs - Minister Nigel Scullion
Contact Details - Parliament House in Canberra:
Ph: (02) 6277 7900
Fax: (02) 6277 3704
Northern Territory office:
Unit 1, 229 McMillans Road, Jingili NT 0810
Ph: (08) 8948 3555
Fax: (08) 8948 3544
Toll Free: 1300 301 723
By email - email@example.com
I hope this helps you with pursuing this matter.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 11:30 AM
They need to know how serious you are. Go to the police and then they will realise you arent making this up. This si one sure way of knowing that the matter will be dealt with seriously. Even if its two against one the fact you are going that extra step and having it written down formally will be helpful should this go further.
I would also demand that the parents of the other children be notified- what happens if they start pushing around their siblings etc thinking its ok? Someone could get hurt and those other kids will get into trouble from their parents if they are seen behaving this way which will lead to some very confused children.
I would also make it known you will go public about this and the fact the staff involved are nothing but liars. You would make the front page of the newspaper Im sure with what happened to your child.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 11:34 AM
Go to the police and report this now ... the fact that she and the obviously the assistant are lying about it. Get the police to charge her with assault.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 12:47 PM
I just emailed my friend in QLD about this .... she is the director of my old center, I didn't give names or anything. She said:
Oh my god! That is shocking! There would b serious consequences 4 the person who was on - I'm not sure how she could prove it unless there was any other parents around but she should defiantly contact family services and report it otherwise their HO might try and sweep it under the carpet. If she complains to Family Service they will have to do an investigation about the whole situation. She could also contact the police because its abuse! Then the police would also have to investigate.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 01:18 PM
OMG, sounds typical for ABC (the centres that don't care) I agree with everyone get the police involved. I have a family member that works for DoCs and he said get intouch with the polic as well. Don't let this slide.
you have made me realise that i should make appearances at my daycare on a more impromtu status. I am lucky though my older DD would say something if she was getting hurt whether physically or mentally but my younger wouldnt.
i hope you took photos of any of his marks or bruises. This woman should be drawn and quartered!!!!!!
Posted 20 August 2007 - 01:25 PM
I'm normally not one to jump to the idea of a lawyer - but given the circumstances, I think it is probably a good idea. You need someone who can be tough and stand up to them.
I'm not suggesting that you aren't tough - you've done a great job so far. But as you said, emotions are involved. So having a third party speak on your behalf may be necessary. Have you spoken to DoC's or the police yet? Get them involved. Maybe DoC's have someone that can talk to the centre for you.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 01:30 PM
just adding: I think the assistant is probably being bullied too. From you saying that she was apologising while you signed him out, she sounds like she's not game to up against this dragon/bully/teacher.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 01:48 PM
I have tears in my eyes reading about you and your son.
I can only imagine the emotions you are going through.
I am likewise a quiet and reserved person so know how hard it is to stand up for yourself. But please do take this further. I know your son is only young, but it will help to show him that nobody has a right to treat you this way.
ETA: Eyes not ears - sorry!! It would be smoke coming out of my ears!!
Edited by chickybabe//, 20 August 2007 - 01:53 PM.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 01:59 PM
I came across this thread accidently.
I am horrified at what has happened to your poor DS. I sent my DS to ABC once, my experience with them was nowhere near as bad as yours, but I did end up removing him from the centre.
Please take this as far as you can and be as strong as you can be. I would hate to think what I wouldve done if I walked in and saw my boy being treated in such a cruel and horrible way.
Please keep us updated.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 02:21 PM
Just wanted to add that I don't know you, but am proud of you for jumping on this first thing in the morning, it wouldn't be easy. Do you have any family or friends who can help you in this fight? Also, make sure ABC know that you are going to contact other organisations, DoCS, Police, and please check out the Website i mentioned earlier, one of the best things that could be achieved here is that this woman never work with children again. It will be your word against thiers, does your report state that the assistant said she was sorry, becuase this shows that even if she wont talk up, that she understood what was happening was wrong. Also, do you know any other families there, anyone that may be able to support you?
How is your little boy? Kids nornmally show stress or upset in funny ways, I really hope he is okay, my son also just turned 3 and I don't know how I would try and explain something like this to him.
Am sending you lots of hugs, strength, fighting power and reslience.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 02:28 PM
I am so sorry that this has happened to your family. I feel sick when I think of your little boy.
ABC is a very large company and will try to bully you. So please be prepared.
Happiness - you are absolutely correct, they close ranks around each other!
Please contact DOCS and the police as this WAS assault on your son. Do everything in your power to make sure that these so called Teachers and carers realise what they have done is so so wrong. I have worked with girls like this in childcare and no matter how much they are told that their behaviour towards children is wrong they just brush it off and think they know everything. Guaranteed the teacher has some how turned this event into just something that happened on Friday afternoon.
She will be compiling her own little story to get out of trouble, and ABC will back her all the way, if you let them. But from experience they do eventually crumble, you just need to keep on them, as I said contact Children's Services, the Police, Make an appointment with the Director and Area Manager( take a 2nd party with you for support ) and let her know the action you have taken so far. This will make them start taking it seriously..
Stay strong with this matter for your little man, we as parents have to stick up for all the injustice in the world and protect our children anyway we can.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 02:48 PM
Well done on speaking to the Director, I can only imagine how you must have been feeling.
You are doing it for your son and for the other children's protection.
Thinking of you
Posted 20 August 2007 - 02:59 PM
Hi I am only on dial up not broadband so been trying to stay offline so I can answer the phone today. The ABC area manager rang me but is away and will do staff interviews on her return in two days. i was not satisfied with this so just contacted the Department Of communties and got an offical complaint underway with them. DOCS do only deal with abuse in the home on speaking with them so my only avenue left is to contact the police, i am still considering this as i am really worried this lady will continue working with children and that the ABC investigation will just cover up the incident. Thankyou for all your advice and and messages of support i will be back later to read them all through in more detail and look up the websites.
Posted 20 August 2007 - 03:03 PM
Please lay assault charges on this girl. THe two older boys will be interviewed by police to ascertain whether charges can be laid. Please dont give up.
People like this need to get out of childcare, she will lose her blue card and I would ring the Commission for Young People and report her there first, then ring the police and lay a complaint then notify Dear Eddie!!
I feel sorry for your little boy, I was bullied at school all my life for being different and I know how that feels. Its just horrible! hugs to you.
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