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Are Todays Children Growing Up Too Quickly?
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Posted 20 April 2011 - 11:18 PM
As a step mum to a 13 year old girl, I feel in some ways she is more grown up than I was at that age, but in other ways I don't think much has changed between 1 generation of teens. She wants to go hang out alone with her friends (shopping etc), she likes boys (although there doesn't seem yet to be any "too serious" interaction) I think the main difference lies in what they UNDERSTAND about the world. There is still than underlying fear of exploring the real adult world but they understand what sex is a lot earlier, about money & the financial responsibilities of life (even if they don't understake those responsibilities themselves), they are a lot more aware of the world and adult issues.
I wasn't playing with dolls or climbing trees at 13 and nor do I expect my SD to. But given the chance, she still jumps on the tramp with my 8 year old son. Our children are not growing up faster, they are just exposed to a greater range of information and what they do with that and how they react is shaped mostly by the boundaries we as parents set and the volume to which we indulge the ever present ability to over-engage in the more adult side of life.
We have rules - Facebook at 13 - ok. We have your password, we check your page daily and keep it in check. Shopping with friends? - ok. Mum or Dad is still within the shopping centre, we have a meeting time and place, a check in via call or text time and we know who you're with and how much money you've got to spend. We have the same boundaries with clothes - fashion says midriff - we say, with a singlet underneath. Short shorts - ok with tights under. I Pod - but not while homework or family time. Compromise, communication and boundaries. Kids aren't different, the world is different and we have to help them fit in to it a information-overloaded world without over-exposing them to what's readily available.
Posted 24 June 2012 - 01:49 PM
Girls are being encouraged by the media and fashion magazines to start wearing
make-up and to pursue superficial beauty at an age where they should instead be
enjoying their childhood.
That's so true. I'm reading a book called, "Living Dolls" right now which explores this very phenomenon of girls being negatively influenced by the current culture. Highly recommend it as a great read.
Posted 24 June 2012 - 01:59 PM
Being tech savvy does not make a child grown up. I would say that if anything children are less mature and 'grown up' than they were when I was a child...I am mid 50's.
Most children were gone from home and earning a living or studying independently by age 18 and often earlier. Very few children these days are.
ETA-There is a big difference between 'feeling' grown up and being treated as if you are grown up and actually 'being' grown up.
Edited by soontobegran, 24 June 2012 - 02:01 PM.
Posted 27 June 2012 - 01:33 PM
I agree soontobegran.
I do think that children are being exposed to adult themes from a younger age and the age of innocence s becoming shorter and shorter.
I hate the idea of tweens.
But the transition of adolescent to adult is now getting longer and longer. An adult was once considered to be someone who turned 21 .now people are starting their carefree 20s and being a grown up with mortgages and responsibilities is more likely to happen at early 30s.
A young mother these days is not someone having a child in their teens, but in their 20s.
My mum by the age of 27 had three children and had immigrated to the other side of the world.
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