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February 03 Parents # 160


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#51 Jet07

Posted 23 May 2009 - 08:19 AM

H Nic - I see you are still there so thought I'd just quickly say that at 10 months I had to do CC with Talon who was just comfort feeding overnight, as I was going back to work and just couldn't do it any more. DH couldn't stand it so I did it when he was away and went to my Mums when he was there. Bit harder with extra and older kids I know.

Me - busy as usual. Will post and come back so Nic sees this. Looks like I missed you but just remembered I went to an 'older babies sleep group" run by a group in Parramatta. I was referred by my MACN in Auburn which is actually a different health area, so you might be able to get referred to if they're still running it.

Edited by Jet07, 23 May 2009 - 08:21 AM.


#52 ~JASB~

Posted 23 May 2009 - 10:51 AM

Nic, I have no idea how I coped sad.gif but your last post sounds so familiar sad.gif  Have you tried CC?  I just don't really know what to suggest as it seemed nothing worked with Shawn.  I was a mess, constantly exhausted and crying cry1.gif  I know how you're feeling sad.gif  I didn't try sleep school, I'm not sure really why i didn't, I think I just kept thinking that 'surely he'll get better soon', but he didn't, not till well over 2 *sigh*

I know somebody posted about using an in home sleep school - nurse came into the house for 2 nights and did it there - I have a feeling it might have been Dani - so would have been Sydney based if it was her.  But not sure if she'd be up to helping you with a name right now as she's having her own dramas with her health.  Maybe do a quick post in misc asking if anybody has used one?  FOr memory whoever posted said it cost about $300 I think??  If my #4 ends up being a bad sleeper as well, I reckon I would pay that, having been through the torture with Shawn.

Not sure what else to say  nno.gif   I'm really feeling for you sad.gif

#53 micallep

Posted 23 May 2009 - 09:08 PM

Oh Nic, so sorry to hear. As basic as it sounds, could Ellie be cold? I know my babies sleep much better in winter with the oil heater on low for most of the night. Might be worth a try anyway??? There are definitely private sleep specialists that come out, just do a google search and you should get something but I imagine they would be quite expensive.
What is Ellie waking up for, is she wanting a comfort feed? If so, what about co sleeping? That's the only thing that kept me sane and allowed me to go back to work with Sienna. I had her comfort feeding through the night until. 2.5yrs.
I think from if you have your GP or ECHC refer you as an urgent case, Tresillian or Karitane can take you in sooner???

xxx to everyone else.

#54 MichelleM

Posted 23 May 2009 - 11:41 PM

Oh Nic I can hear the desperation in your words and I certainly think that your CHN could refer you to a sleep school urgently if you went to them and told them the same thing.  I really feel for you because I know it totally sucks and, as you're the only one with the boobs and the patience, you're the one who's shoulders it falls on.  

Michaela's idea of a person coming to your home is a good one, that way it's done with the boys and DH present not in a specialised environment which might be hard to take back to the real world when you get home.

I tried controlled crying with Scarlett probably about the same age as Ellie is (I was at my witts end too) but we got 15 minutes into it (going in at intervals of 2 mins) and I couldn't go on, Brett was telling me to stop and Josh was really upset by it.  I suppose if I had of had the support or was on my own she might have been sleeping through sooner.

On the upside though, Scarlett has just stopped waking one to two hourly over night (from birth) if that gives you some hope.  All of a sudden a couple of weeks ago she slept through and continued to sleep through pretty much every night since!  She still may wake one or two times but that's nothing right!

Just a quickie though, she doesn't have an ear infection does she?  Sleeping for very short spurts over night was a sure fire sign that Josh or Bel had an ear infection.  But I guess if you've been battling this for months then it's most probably a sleep association thing, she can't resettle without you (that's Scarlett, needs me to feed her back to sleep).  Ping's cosleeping idea is a good one too, we did that for months with Scarlett but I found I got less sleep as she would want to be attached ALL night in the end so an hour at a time was better than no sleep!

Oh and FINALLY!  In the last couple of weeks after I've finished feeding Scarlett I've been digging Brett in the ribs and making him take her back to her cot!  I get up and bring her into our bed to feed while laying down under the blankets and once she's done he takes her back.  It's only once or twice a night now and it's 2 seconds out of his night, I don't think he wakes up half the time, does it on auto pilot lol!  Means I can settle back to sleep quicker and feel more rested.

I hope for some sleep for you soon Nic.

Hi to everyone else, hope your weekends are going well and you're not all drowning with the bad weather all over at the moment!  

We took the kids to see Night at the Museum 2 this afternoon which they both enjoyed.  I was very hesitant thinking it might be too scary but Josh loved it and Isabella was a little concerned in a couple of the bits but it was pretty tame.  I think the time is coming that either Brett or I will have to stay at home with Scarlett.  She still stays contained in the baby bjorn but today she wanted out so I had to walk out with her a couple of times.  So only relaxed and fed for the last 15 minutes where as last school holidays she fed and slept the whole movie!

#55 Nics

Posted 25 May 2009 - 01:05 PM

Oh Michelle - I forgot about you with Scarlett...  you dont complain much thats probably why!!!  Maybe Ive just got to suck it up and get on with it... Im obviously not alone on this one  nno.gif  but I cant help but think I need to try some alternatives as its starting to affect my ability as a mother to my other kids and dont even get me started on our relationship/marriage.  Which also means Im not really doing well in any aspect of my life whilst Im a walking zombie...  its easy to say just hang in there she wont be like it forever .. but what if she doesnt magically grow out of it until Shawn did?  I cant go on like this for another year!   ddoh.gif  

I have made an appt with ECHN who I have a really good relationship with - she knows the ins and outs of DH as well so I think will be quite supportive.  Im thinking I can get put on the list for a residential stay but if something happens in the meantime (or she may offer some suggestions) I can always pull out and the next desperate person can take my place  ssorry.gif  

So bring on Thursday - in the interim Im keeping a bit of a diary of each night and what I have/am trying to see if theres something I simply cant see/am overlooking.  

Sorry for the me me me posts atm.....  

Ping - glad to see you are still hanging in there.  Are you still getting contractions etc?  Thanks for the advice on DH too.. its going to be a long hard struggle - but I did have a semibreakdown on the weekend and told him he has to step up and be a father and a husband.  If he doesnt want that well he really shouldnt be here.  I have to be blunt with him - it seems to be the only thing that works - otherwise it gets fobbed off and he just says hes fine/its all fine when clearly it isnt!  


OK shes awake so its time to get to Jarrod's school for education day  tongue.gif

#56 MichelleM

Posted 25 May 2009 - 10:24 PM

Oh no way Nic, you certainly don't have to suck it up because, like you said, it could be months/years before she starts sleeping better and that's no life to live.  It's great that you have a CHN that you trust so hopefully she'll get you in ASAP and a diary is a great idea too (although I'm betting that you're not the issue, sometimes babies just don't sleep!).

As for DH, blunt works for us too.  I could stew away on something for days with Brett being completely oblivious, now I just come straight out with it.  That goes for requests of help.

Don't be sorry for the me posts either, we all have to get it out somewhere.

As for me, I have to go mop now sad.gif  I have people coming over for lunch tomorrow, and should have had it all done today BUT Scarlett did not sleep a wink and Isabella was home sick which required 2 trips to the Dr (the initial appt and then a second because she couldn't produce a wee sample the first time - turns out she was faking it and there was nothing wrong - she admitted as much too!).

#57 Keropi

Posted 26 May 2009 - 08:27 AM

Michelle - she faked it?!  That's funny, why do you think she did that?  She loves school doesn't she?

Might take myself off to the movies this morning to see Boy in the Striped Pyjamas.

#58 micallep

Posted 26 May 2009 - 04:29 PM

Oh Nic, good luck tomorrow. Hope you can work something out with your ECHN for Ellie. Being exhausted just makes everything else harder to deal with as well. Oh gosh, don't worry a bit of bluntness here and there works a treat here too LOL and although I'm sorry you had a semi breakdown but at the same time perhaps good for S to see a bit of reality and understand how much it's impacting you.  
Yes, I'm still getting contractions all the time, just not worried about them turning into labour now (OB also said I can stop the ventolin syrup now) however I have to say I am quite over being pg. I said to my OB last week that I felt like I've been in pre labour for months now!


Michelle, oh that cheeky Isabella!. Must have thought herself mighty clever for a while there LOL.

Michaela, I just recently went to the naturopath for the 1st time and she gave me some high potency magnesium for my restless legs which definately seems to be helping me so I'm a bit of a naturopath convert now too  tthumbs.gif .

xxx

#59 Nics

Posted 28 May 2009 - 08:29 PM

UPDATE.......

I went to see my ECHN today and she referred me quick smart onto Tresillian.... I feel so relieved - there is a light at the end of the tunnel (even if the tunnel might be long.... ) but as I said to her - its affecting our whole family! And my decision was cemented today when I went in to see J's teacher today and she asked if everything is OK because Jarrod has been so quiet/teary/distant which is totally unlike him. I feel like the worst mother in the world to my boys BUT I AM doing my best.

I can expect a call from Tresillian either tomorrow or early next week and I guess from that conversation that will work out how "urgent" our case is! DH actually did a little dance tonight when I told him its a residential stay for a few nights - I think its just so he can have a few nights uninterrupted sleep  Frustrating thing is occasionally she does sleep through the night (1 out of 10 nights maybe) so I KNOW she can do it - I jsut have to break the habit but Im finding it hard doing that on my own!

Anyway onwards and upwards - you would think by #3 Id know what I was doing... but nope goes to show they are all different!  Im also happy about Tresillian because they delve into "issues" and offer a semi-counselling option (and they will ask DH in for this too) so I think its a good option overall!

Sorry about me post just wanted to let you all know whats going on

#60 MichelleM

Posted 28 May 2009 - 10:00 PM

Brilliant news Nic and even just knowing that help is on it's way must make it a bit easier to get through each day.  The counselling is a great idea too, I hope DH gets into it and can work through some issues.  Biggest hugs about Jarrod but you know, boys this age are pretty emotional creatures anyway and it doesn't take too much to upset them so don't feel bad.  Good is coming for you all with this sleep issue sorted.

Ohhh Ping you are sooo close now!  Can you believe that any day you will be a Mother to 3!!  My memory is shot, did you find out what you are having and have we discussed names yet?

Julie she sure did fake it and the next day topped the trip to the Drs!  She was so unwilling to go to school that she put her fingers down her throat and made herself be sick right in front of us!  After that I went in and had a long talk to her teacher and we both decided that she should come to school that day so she went in late.  It seems that she was having friend problems, one little girl was being very posessive and not letting Bel play with other kids.  So they had a mediation session and the little girl was spoken to but I can't see that as being the problem stopping her from going to school honestly.  Isabella told me it was because she was finding school hard but her teacher went through her work book with me and said that she was at the top of the class and was finding nothing difficult.  I don't know, I still think it is all to do with Scarlett so I'm thinking about seeing someone professionally about it.

I totally jinxed myself in my last post.  Scarlett has stopped sleeping through again, it was a blissful respite those sleepy weeks but she's again waking all night and basically if she's not attached to me, she doesn't sleep!  I'm not sure if she's unwell though as she's barely eaten for 4 days but she's otherwise happy, just wants to breastfeed all day and night.

She's given me a big blister on one of my nipples too, totally ouch!

Oh as if on cue, she's woken up  nno.gif

#61 Keropi

Posted 29 May 2009 - 06:24 PM

Nic - that is great news.  I went to Tresillian with Ashlen and it was a life saver.  I found them to be great.  S and the boys can visit whenever they like too.  Also if you can get babysitters for the boys S can come as well.  The fees when I went were quite small.  Baby was covered under Medicare and I payed around $35 a day for boarding which included everything.

Michelle I hope Miss I decides to stop being silly.  That's quite worrying that she is doing it.  Have you had issues like these with her in the past?  Why do you think it has to do with Scarlett?

I still have no job news yet and feel pretty average health wise.  Hoping to go to bed early tonight.  It is our town festival tomorrow and Damien wants to go to the city to see all the light shows, so need to rest up.

#62 Keropi

Posted 01 June 2009 - 05:19 PM

Where is everyone?

I worked today, Ethan is sick so Damien stayed home with him.  Nothing but germbags we are!

#63 Keropi

Posted 05 June 2009 - 07:54 PM

C'mon girls get off FB long enough to say hi to me! tongue.gif

#64 MichelleM

Posted 06 June 2009 - 12:11 AM

waves.gif Julie!

So why aren't you on facebook then huh?  How's the family doing now, still bug-a-fied?

Scarlett had bronchialitis this past week and sounds like a pack a day smoker but repipred has worked wonders and she's on the mend again.  Amazingly she's slept very well (only one wake up a night) the last couple of nights since being on it too which I am sooo thankful for.  Prior to getting this stuff into her I was sitting up all night because the coughing would keep her awake if laying down.

She turns on on Wednesday would you believe!  It has been the most wonderful, toughest, fantastic year though.  If only they could stay our babies forever though  cry1.gif

Isabella had another situation with the same child today, nasty piece of work that little one is.  I think I may have over estimated Isabella's strength and resilience, this might actually be bothering her more than I originally thought, especially if it has been going on all year unnoticed.  I feel terrible that I put her behaviour down to jealousy, there certainly still is some at home, but I think her reluctance to go to school has everything to do with school.  Thankfully her teachers are fabulous and it helps that they love Bel so I trust will look out for her.  Doesn't stop me from wanting to confront the Mother though - I won't of course but I want to!

Michaela and anyone else who knows about carseats can I have your advice?  Scarlett is currently in a Safe & Sound capsule and weighs 8.1kg fully clothed so easily still fits weight wise (goes up to 12kg).  However there is barely 2 inches from her head to the top of the capsule which means she's getting too tall right?

I was going to put her straight from the capsule into a maxirider which I thought would be when she was close to 12kg.  However if she is getting too tall for the capsule, I will have to change seats earlier and I'm not sure I'm comfortable putting her in such a big seat like a MR.  

What would you do?  Put her into the MR as she is technically heavy enough for it or purchase another seat that can rear face but is taller (which one?) and then use Josh's booster when she grows out of the new car seat in a few years time (Josh will be 9ish by that stage!)?

Anyway!  How is everyone else?  Nic have you heard from Tresillian yet?

#65 Keropi

Posted 06 June 2009 - 12:37 PM

Michelle - what is going on at school?  I think I've missed something.  It is good to know her teachers are on the ball.  I remember Miss S turns 1, it is the same as Damien's birthday.  What are you going to do for  her?

Yes Nic how are you going?

Man, we still have lurgies.  I'm a little over it.  It's one thing feeling average then to wake up and not being able to swallow.  I can't even talk or rather don't have the energy to and we know how much I love to hear my own voice!!

Needless to say still chugging on, taking advantage of the sun to do the washing.  Cleaning up some hotspots while the kids are at language class so they don't see what I'm throwing out.  You know how it is - they love to keep every scrap of paper!  We were meant to go camping this weekend but have cancelled due to lurgies.  Could have been a good thing though.  My friends property that we were going to has loads of leeches that have come up the property from the bush with all the rain we have had.  Ewwww.

#66 ~JASB~

Posted 06 June 2009 - 05:23 PM

Just lost my post cry1.gif
I'm running my laptop on just power cord atm, no battery in it at all (needs a new one!), and the power cable fell out of the back cry1.gif  Man I hate that!

Julie, you need to get your butt on FB then Tounge1.gif

Michelle, a couple of inches is fine.  The standard rule is 2.5cm - so long as she has 2.5cm (not inches) or more of hard shell above her head, then it's fine.  If she gets less than 2.5cm above her head anytime soon, then I'd personally be getting her a new RF seat rather than MR so young.  Take a look at the Babylove Prelude - it's a fairly cheap one in Kmart, but always rates highly in the crash tests.  You should be ok with any of the SnS convertibles as well.  Just try her in them before you buy just to check how much room she has.  HTH original.gif

Ping, how you going!!?

Nic, any news?

I have to run, but wanted to quickly reply to Michelle (again!  after losing my power ddoh.gif )

M

#67 micallep

Posted 06 June 2009 - 05:48 PM

Hello lovely ladies.

Michaela, yes I'm still here and pg, I'm now joking that I'm a week overdue LOL! Herbs from natropath are definately working, she gave me something that assists the uterus to do what it should do and calm down the 5min apart contractions. Well since stopping the ventolin and starting the herbs around the same time, I've had no bouts of 5min apart contractions!!!! I still have contractions throughout the day, however I'm confident the next time they start getting regular it will be the real deal!!!

Michelle, yes did I miss something too with this other child at school? Poor Isabella, does she talk to you about it? Hope the school is doing everything they can to help the situation.

Julie, good thing you didn't go. Any sort of creature/bug scares the daylights out of me!! Needless to say I've never been camping in a tent and don't intend to anytime soon.

waves.gif to everyone else.

#68 ~JASB~

Posted 06 June 2009 - 06:05 PM

Wow Ping, 38 weeks - you wont know yourself LOL!!!

Thinking of you and sending real labour vibes for you anytime now hey sweetie!!  Mwah!

M

#69 Keropi

Posted 07 June 2009 - 12:06 PM

Argh, we've had a beautiful sunny morning enticing me to do washing when I feel like crap, so I did and now it is playing hide and seek with the clouds!  Just let it not rain until my sheets are dry!!

Ping - well done on making it this far.  

Michaela- bugger on your post.  I hate it when my battery dies.  

Nic and Jannette - where are you?

So what is everyone up to this long weekend?  Hopefully not house bound like me!  I'm so frustrated with myself!!!!
The kids are being angels though, playing so well together, helping out.  I should count my blessings - I could be stuck at home with horror children!

#70 MichelleM

Posted 08 June 2009 - 03:02 PM

We don't have a holiday today, ours was last week because WA HAS to be different  rolleyes.gif   But Julie, to answer your question, we had breaksfast out with friends and then went to a park that is a fair distance from our house and then went to another park closer once we got home!

Hope your family is getting better Julie.  One sickie in our household is enough!  Great to hear that your children are being lovely though.

Ping fantastic to hear that baby is still in there happily!  Looking forward to hearing the announcement though!

THANKYOU Michaela, especially coming back after you lost your post!  I thought that getting her another RF seat would be the go but wanted to double check I wasn't just being paranoid which I'm constantly told by MIL that I am!  She keeps asking when Scarlett will be in a REAL car seat meaning FF.  I keep telling her when she's big enough  rolleyes.gif

Isabella's school issue, sorry if I didn't go into it, I have a BAD memory these days!!

She went through a patch last week where she didn't want to go to school and was faking illness to stay at home (which I got sucked into because she has never done it before!).  Once I realised what she was doing I asked her what was going one, why she didn't want to go and she said because she found school too hard.  That's rubbish as she's doing really well but I got the teachers to confirm it for me just in case I was oblivious, which they did.  I put it down to wanting to stay at home with me!  

The teacher kept an eye out and saw that her good friend was actually being nasty to her in the playground, not obviously and because Isabella doesn't dob or get outwardly upset, it was never noticed.  It was bothering her though obviously.  The 'friend' was telling Isabella that she couldn't play with the other kids, just her and if she did then the little girl wouldn't be her friend, also the girl had all these toys which Bel could, then couldn't, then maybe could play with etc - just little things that matter to a 5 year old.  Isabella has never encountered this bahviour so wouldn't have known it was wrong, just that it didn't feel good, probably very confusing for her.  The teacher did a mediation type thing with the girls and it sounds as though it was sorted out but the teachers are looking out for her.

Scarlett's awake so must go.  Hi to everyone, Nic I saw you typing yesterday but you never posted, hope you're ok.

#71 Nics

Posted 08 June 2009 - 07:56 PM

Yes Michelle - lost the bloody post and unlike Michaela - didnt do another  ssorry.gif  

Im stsill around but only just....  it seems my lifeline has been pulled away from me again  cry1.gif I had to chase Tresillian up a week after my referral as I still had not had a ph call - they took my basic details (like address, DOB etc) and then she said next avail appt is 2 weeks time - and that is just a phone call from a nurse to talk about whats going on  ohmy.gif ...  and then its a wait depending on how long down the list I am....  so I dont even get to talk to anyone for 2 weeks  nno2.gif  so I was feeling in a bit of a hopeless situation - realistically Im not likely to get in for 8 weeks and shes going to be 1 by then  oomg.gif  so after feeling sorry for myself Ive gathered the Tresilian information (I know someone who works there but unfortunately in HO and cant help with residential  nno2.gif  nno2.gif ) and Ive started to do it at home and yes I think shes starting to come good!   tthumbs.gif  We have had a few fairly good nights and Im seeing progress so I just have to try to stay strong and not get lazy throughout the night and give in and feed her - but as you all know when you are sleep deprived its easier said than done  unsure.gif  

So apologies for not posting - Ive just been trying to get on top of things here.  

Ping - OMG you have lasted!  Cant wait to hear the news though...  

Michelle - Scarlett is 1  oomg2.gif  are you sad??  As much as I want this babystage over with - I still dont want Ellie to turn 1  sad.gif

Jules - we must try to organise a choc cafe get together...  the next 2 weeks are fairly bad for me but after that Im good to go!  What do you think?  

Michaela - whats happening with you?  

And Gina - where have you been? MIA for a while!  

OK off to deal with all these clothes strewn over my bedroom floor - hoping Ellie stays asleep so I get to watch Desperate Housewives - otherwise Im stuck in her room resettling  dry.gif

Will get back on soon and update on the rest of the fam but all is good except for Aiden who went forehead first into one of our pergola poles yday whilst riding his scooter - he has the biggest egg you hve ever seen.....  Im so suprised he wasnt concussed but I did keep a very close eye and let him sleep with me lasst night just for peace of mind (well sleep in my bed - I spent a lot of time in Ellie's room  wacko.gif )




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