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how was your DH/DP during your labour?

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#1 md86

Posted 02 February 2011 - 09:35 PM

Just wondering.. how was your DH/DP during your labour and in the lead up to? was he freaking out? calm? going crazy?

I am due in 6 weeks..and while im abit worried about what it will be like, my DH keeps teasing me saying hes going to freak out or faint biggrin.gif im sure he will be ok though..btw we havent done any parenting classes...but are going to soon

ps any funny stories?

Edited by md86, 02 February 2011 - 09:37 PM.

#2 raven74

Posted 02 February 2011 - 09:43 PM

He was awesome.  We ended up having to go in for induction, and it was a long wait.  He amused me y putting surgical gloves over his head and blowing them up.
My waters broke naturally while we were waiting for an ARM induction and he was great for the early labour.  I then had to go onto the drip and as the pain increased he got even more fabulous - coaching me, counting me in and out, wetting my face, doing whatever I needed.  We had discussed his role though and I made sure he knew what I needed him to do.
Later,  he was so proud of his efforts in the delivery room that a few people asked him if I was even there laugh.gif

#3 *Lib*

Posted 02 February 2011 - 09:43 PM

My sister had been told to expect bad news when her baby was born......understandably they were worried about the birth. Her husband went for a walk...asked the nurse how long the baby would be, when she said minutes, he took off. My sister still holds resentment about it now and her daughter is nearly 5, and perfect. wub.gif

#4 wantingno2

Posted 02 February 2011 - 09:52 PM

Ex DP downed about 8 cans of V in 2 hours so was pretty zoned....held my hand yadda yadda yadda, DD was born and he promptly went outside to make some calls (i thought to family) to the thing he was cheating on me with annoucing 'our' good news. With my phone!!!!!
I have never forgiven him.

Needless to say, my current DP has been a godsend. We are currently TTC but he comes to every appt and test and is very informed with all procedures. So he will be a champ.

Good luck OP it will be beautiful and your DH will be fine, original.gif

#5 Guest_Buggylicious_*

Posted 02 February 2011 - 09:58 PM

He just sat there silently on a stool next to me, I didn't want to be touched or talked to so he was perfect original.gif

#6 RynandStompy

Posted 02 February 2011 - 10:04 PM

edited to remove some birthing details as that much detail isn't nice to someone who has labour coming up.

During the birthing stage some unexpected difficulties came up. DH was amazing at keeping me calm during the pain but also NOT letting on that DD was turning blue and that the staff were (also calmly) starting to do some things to treat her while we were basically waiting for contractions to come back and help push her out.

I know he so wanted to ask them what was happening as he said later he was really worried about her and me - but  he refrained from doing so because it would have stressed and panicked me.

Instead he kept me focussed and we got through it together. DD is fine original.gif

To me, he was absolutely heroic in not letting me see how worried he actually was at that time. wub.gif

Edited by rynandstompy, 02 February 2011 - 10:10 PM.

#7 Popeye

Posted 02 February 2011 - 10:04 PM

Very calm, let me squeeze his hand lots.

#8 BabeBlossom

Posted 02 February 2011 - 10:06 PM

Mine was nervous in the lead up so I got him to watch some positive birthing videos, read an active birth book and plenty of googling and in the end he felt like he knew what his role was and said he was actually looking forward to it. Pity my lovely active birth turned into a full intervention 17 hour ordeal but he took it all in his stride, listened to the Dr and midwife and was the best help and support. He even gave me a great sponge bath afterwards when the feeling hadnt fully come back to my legs after the epidural!

#9 Puggle

Posted 02 February 2011 - 10:11 PM

He was amazing. I was expecting him to be pretty useless blush.gif but he was wonderful.

#10 hyperion

Posted 02 February 2011 - 10:15 PM

He said he would be useless and would only stand at my head.
He was awesome. He was my rock. And he did everything he could to help.

#11 Guest_Corey'smummy_*

Posted 02 February 2011 - 10:21 PM

Dp was great he chatted to me and the midwife (i was induced so i was in hospital for the duration of my labour and birth) got me drinks when i asked and was just there for me when i was having contractions he was there holding my hand though once the pushing stage stated he was telling me what a great job i was doing and what he could see hmmmmmm charming  sick.gif  he was to scared to hold my had during that stage as he thought i would break his hand  laugh.gif.
But yes dp was great thought labour and during the birth of our ds.

#12 namie

Posted 02 February 2011 - 10:22 PM

He was fantastic! I think he was worried, in the lead up, that he would faint or not be at all helpful and out of his depth but he was great.

We'd watched the Being Dad DVDs which helped him get some different perspectives on the process as well as see a birth and this possibly helped prepare him.

In the early stages of my induction there wasn't much for him to do except rub my back and murmur encouraging things, so he did take some time to nap and text our mothers with details, but the pre-labour was lengthy.
Once first stage properly commenced he really came into his own, helped and encouraged by the fabulous midwife we had. I had an epidural at some point and from then on he would be at my side rubbing my back or just chatting in between contractions, and then for each contraction he'd hoist one of my feet up onto his waist and the midwife supported the other while I breathed and pushed through them.
At one point she took a look and announced that she could see the head - DP practically swooped into position with an 'Oh wow, really! OMG it's so small' (I was just perhaps 5cm dilated at the time, so all he saw was a small portion!).
He checked the progress every time she did, then when my OB came he moved back to my side and held my hand. He helped lay DS onto my chest and cut the umbilical cord and didn't even flinch or let me know when he witnessed the episiotomy or the stitching happen.

He was a stellar birthing partner and I'm extremely proud of him!

#13 Bridandzar

Posted 02 February 2011 - 10:24 PM

My DH was amazing. He kept me focused and was very active in the birth.  When he left the room for DD1 (he was gone 5 minutes if that) I totally lost the plot, for DD2 he didn't leave myside for a second!!.  I truely believe I would not have been able to do it without him.

Both times the midwives joked that he took over their job and was amazing  wub.gif

With DD2 she had to be incubated and taken to ICC and he really stepped in and ensured we were both doing well.

#14 md86

Posted 03 February 2011 - 11:02 AM

Thanks for your replies. Nice to hear that most of your DH/DPs were very supportive original.gif

Would love to hear more original.gif

#15 Keddie

Posted 03 February 2011 - 12:28 PM

Left at the beginning to get me a power drink and I suddenly felt as if half of me was missing and I've never needed him so badly.  He was back in about 5 minutes and didn't leave my side after that.  He was amazing.  He has bad ankles from sport and the next day they looked like soccer balls and he could hardly walk.  I quizzed him and it was from squatting beside me as I laboured in the hospital shower for hours.
His hands ached too as I squeezed them HARD for about 16hrs straight.

He was worried he would be useless and really thought he'd have no idea what to do.  He just followed my lead and I hear stories of men who respect and love their wives even more after seeing them go through childbirth - I can say the same for my hubby wub.gif

#16 hubbymeand3

Posted 03 February 2011 - 12:35 PM

I wasn't sure how mine would go - but he was great, supportive, followed my lead and let me squeeze his hand when I needed to.  For one delivery he rubbed my back for ages but the other two were faster and he knew to just sit tight and keep in contact IYKWIM... I didn't want too much...

He was also in tears at the sight of his first born (son) and I've rarely seen him cry in 16 years.... so that was an amazing thing to see!

#17 Guest_starbellied_*

Posted 03 February 2011 - 12:39 PM

My husband is always calm, and during the birth he was no different.

He just did everything I asked him to do (well ask might be the wrong word laugh.gif

I couldn't have asked for anyone better to be with me, compliant, loving and calm.  He was perfect (but I think he is always  wub.gif

#18 niggles

Posted 03 February 2011 - 12:59 PM

Calm and quiet and then calm and excited as he could see DD's head and could no longer contain himself. His face had this look of pride on it which was nice and encouraging.

I tried to get him to prepare with me and practise relaxation techniques and took him through all the things I was packing in my bag beforehand but he wasn't keen. Didn't turnout to be much of a problem in the end. Ultimately what I really wanted was to have him right beside me and he did that beautifully. My midwife took care of all the practicalities and gave him perfect instructions. That gave me new respect for what midwives do. She was a wonder.

#19 Seven of Nine

Posted 03 February 2011 - 01:02 PM

My DH is very good. cool.gif Once the active phase of labour kicks in I like silence, calm, repitition, and I like to lean on him. He just does it. He doesn't say a word above what's absolutely necessary, following my lead in everything. He knows my wishes and so he advocates for me. He has been the reason I have managed without an epidural every time.

That said, I don't think he likes it very much. blush.gif He says he doesn't feel like he's doing anything to help and he hates seeing me in pain. When we fell pregnant with DS2 he said to me 'are you ready to go through all that (labour) again?' I said yes. Of course I'd forgotten all the bad bits! He said 'I'm not' laughing2.gif He managed fine. But once DS2 was safely in my arms after becoming distressed during second stage (shoulder dystocia - Baby excreted meconium and was born not breathing) I turned around joyfully to my husband only to find him gone! He was lying on the couch and MY midwife was getting him a cup of tea! laughing2.gif

#20 whydoibother

Posted 03 February 2011 - 01:06 PM

for a guy how can't even watch ER he watched DDs birth which was a forceps etc and quote "I have never seen so much blood in my life"  and he watched the other two being born as well.  HE also held my hand, got me heat packs, supported me.  Amazing original.gif wub.gif  he also went with the boys to the resus trolley when they needed a bit of help

Edited by Rough-Diamond, 03 February 2011 - 01:07 PM.

#21 rileys-mum

Posted 03 February 2011 - 01:14 PM

Honestly -- truly irritating....not that he meant to be, he was trying to help but I felt that I just needed my own space and work through the contractions myself.

In my first labour, I got very weak towards the end and struggled to push bub out so second time around, he was trying to get me to eat - drink when I just wanted to be left alone.

He also tried to massage my back, hand ect. But no I just wanted to be left alone and not touched.

During the second labour, he fell asleep. It was perfect!!! He was there just in case, but not talking, not telling me what to do, how to feel and not touching me! It was wonderful.

Could I labour alone without him -- oh yeah!!

#22 new~mum~reenie

Posted 03 February 2011 - 02:53 PM

He kept telling me that he was planning on spending it 2 streets away at the pub.  He was most worried at how he wuold handle seeing me in 'pain'.

But he was awesome. Did as he was told ( biggrin.gif ) and wouldn't have missed it for the world.

It was a wonderful home birth, but he made plans to stay away from the pointy end and that was fine with me!! He even cut the cord (he said he probably wouldn't, but he was full of joy etc!).

While the mW's attended me DH (still in his PJ's) held bub. The MW said to put him under his jumper for skin-on-skin contact because the air was a bit chilly that morning. Suddenly DH made a little scream and the yelled "he just tried to suckkle!" ha ha ha ha ha!!!

#23 Jupiter123

Posted 03 February 2011 - 03:01 PM

DH was fantastic. Came to all appointments, took care of my every want and need.

During labour was absolutely fabulous even tho I kicked him twice in the you know whats during contractions.

He said he did not want to be down the business end, which was fine with me however when the time came he could not look away lol.

He cut the cord which was great.

And ever since he has helped with everything.

#24 r3na3

Posted 09 February 2011 - 12:39 PM

QUOTE (*Lib* @ 02/02/2011, 10:43 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My sister had been told to expect bad news when her baby was born......understandably they were worried about the birth. Her husband went for a walk...asked the nurse how long the baby would be, when she said minutes, he took off. My sister still holds resentment about it now and her daughter is nearly 5, and perfect. wub.gif

*Lib* do you mean your sisters husband left her in the delivery room and left their marriage??

#25 Maple Leaf

Posted 09 February 2011 - 12:42 PM

He was great. The only time I got a bit peeved, when in labour with DD1 and I was throwing up (quick labour that hit me fast!) and he simply turned his head away, passed me the vomit bowl and continued to drink his coffee. lol.

But, both labours he was fantastic, quiet and there for support.

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