The words "sorry" and "but" should not be used as i look back myself two years ago. The sorrow I felt at the time as I grieved, was so very short, as I was verbally slapped by one who said .."well did you do the tests? Well if you had you could of DONE something about it."
IT.. IT.. this is my son my baby the one I had kick me from inside for months and squirm, the one who nuzzled into me when placed on my chest.. he is no IT, and I wont take that from anyone!!
That day I no longer grieved at the child I thought I lost, I love the one I wanted, my son, my beautiful son, who had me as his avocate, standing up for him when others wouldnt. I was and will continue to do my utmost for him.
Now we had some troubles getting things right. It took 4 months before he actually breastfed, but once we started he continued until 20 months of age. he has no health issues to concern myself with and he laughs cries, sings songs, claps his hands and when I tell him off and to leave something alone, he smiles cheekily to me and touches it again until I get up and move it away from him. He yells at me and carries onlike any two year old not getting their way and he will smack at me if he doesnt like what I am doing.
At one stage with his hair natually spiked, we would get many people coming up and admiring him, so he now expects people to talk to him. His smile is so very warming but if he doesnt like you, you have no hope.
I am now pregnant again, and I have had the whole "are you not worried...??" NO I am not worried as having this boy has changed my life for the better and if this is as hard as it gets, I am not going to be in the least bit worried.
Edited by bronzzeAngel, 14 May 2011 - 05:13 PM.