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Anyone else hate breastfeeding?
Update - no longer hating it!


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#1 MuddyPuddles

Posted 17 May 2011 - 10:51 PM

I'm afraid I'll get flamed for saying this, but honestly, I hate breastfeeding.  It is and has been the biggest source of anxiety for me since my baby girl was born. Every time I've cried/gotten upset is due to bfing.

You always hear about how beautiful and magical bfing is, and how women enjoy that time so much. Are there any women out there who hate it but do it anyway? And at what point did they stop?

The reasons I dont like bfing include:
- Despite ABA councillers, midwives and lactation consultants telling me the latch is fine I still have a lot of pain (5 weeks on)
- I keep getting blocked ducts and have had mastitis twice already
- Not being able to routine feed stresses me out (demand feeding drives me insane, I'm a structure/planning person)
- I'm sick of having to restrict caffiene, garlic, onion etc
- Due to massive boobs I hate feeding in public but dont want to stay home all the time, (not to mention nursing bras with enough support for 16F boobs are hideous and unflattering under clothes)
- Sex feels out of the question while bfing (because I feel weird about it, not DH. Not to mention the nipple pain!)
- I hate being 100% responsible for feeding and the only one who can do it
- The time/effort of expressing doesnt seem worth the length of break you get

I know these are all selfish reasons but it doesnt stop me from feeling them...Every night while feeding her I think about when can I stop and wish I could just give her a bottle of formula, but then feel guilty for feeling like that.

I feel guilty for dreading each feed and worry that I'm starting to resent my baby for causing me physical pain every 1-4 hours and making me feel like a bad person for not enjoying something I "should" be.


So my follow on question is how long can you breastfeed for to get the maximum amount  of benefit for the least amount of time? I know the ideal is 2 years,  but is there any research on the amount of benefit gained from 6 weeks, 12  weeks, 6 months, 1 year?

If 3 months is only slightly less beneficial than 6 months, or 6 weeks only slightly less beneficial than 12 weeks, I'd like to know so I can make an informed decision.



I know breast is best, but surely at some point the negative effect on the mother (and therefore her relationship with baby) must outweigh the benefit of breast milk?

Edited by jesscar1, 07 July 2011 - 04:00 PM.


#2 Gangnam Style

Posted 17 May 2011 - 10:57 PM

It's a bit like carrying the baby. They'll probably survive if born at 24 weeks. But much healthier if born at 40 weeks.



#3 Soontobegran

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:00 PM

OP---All I can say is everything you have mentioned are issues frequently experienced by new mothers in the first few weeks of life and most women will get through these feelings and suddenly realise it has got easier and they are starting to enjoy it.
Breast feeding can be a very unattractive proposition for many women---you are not bad or unusual.

Ultimately it may still be a very wonderful experience for you.
Lots of good luck to you.


#4 3_for_me

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:02 PM

Honestly OP, there is no point doing it if it results in you being so stressed out that you can't enjoy your time with your baby and be the mum you could be.  I have breastfed all three of my kids for varying lengths of time but with DS1 it just didn't work for many of the same reasons you have stated(except for the big boobs-I don't have any Tounge1.gif ).  At about 9 weeks my husband looked at me crying on the couch one evening and told me that he was going to buy a tin of formula and he was going to feed DS with  it.  He believes in breastfeeding and has supported me through feeding all of our kids but as an outsider he could see that at that time it was not a healthy thing for me.  I'm very glad he did it, I had so much guilt and was so set on doing the right thing for my baby that I forgot that I wasn't doing the right thing by him by pushing myself to the lengths I was.


That said, my experiences with my other babies were much better and it did get better after about the 7 week mark with them.  I would suggest giving it a little more time to see if things settle if you think you can.

Edited by 3_for_me, 17 May 2011 - 11:03 PM.


#5 mini-muffin

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:06 PM

Jesscar1 - nice honest post.  Totally understandable.. Those early days can be hellish esp if you run into bouts of mastitis etc.  I'm sure you have had this before... but things do start to settle down between 6-12 weeks....The boobs start to settle down, less engorged, nipples 'rubberise (as my friend once put it)...yes, it is can be very painful (esp if you have sensitive nipples), and I think you body's hormones tend to settle down as well....so the tiredness is less pronounces with the huge oxytocin surges (that come with milk let down release).

The evidence points to min of 6 months....but that's a long time if you are expressing (this is ALOT more work than breastfeeding!!!) so I think 4-6 months would be a good start.

Dont' beat yourself if you don't get to any particular time-frame though.

#6 Rach_V

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:08 PM

The only time I really enjoyed breastfeed was during the night feeds when DD actually fed peacefully, didn't fuss at all and fed for longer than 5 minutes at a time! Mostly I found it a constant source of stress, I was driven to tears many times with a fussy little feeder and a complete overload of information - reflux/oversupply/low supply... in hindsight I wish I'd just relaxed and let DD lead the way! I think they certainly pick up on your emotions and stresses. I was never comfortable feeding in public either, which is ridiculous because I certainly don't have a problem if I see a woman breastfeeding her baby!

I hope you don't get flamed for voicing how you feel OP, you're not alone in feeling that way. I'm hoping that with bub #2 I'll be a lot calmer about the whole situation and ENJOYABLY feed for longer than 5 months. I have never felt so guilty in my life as I did when I started weaning DD but a friend helped when she told me that she'd fed her first baby until 9 months and her 2nd baby for only 2 weeks - but she felt the exact same sense of guilt on both occasions, it didn't matter how long she breastfed for.
Breast IS best, but it's horrible to be driven to the point of despair so just do whatever you need to. original.gif




#7 bloodorange

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:13 PM

i here you, dont feel guilty but feel proud that you love and care for  your baby and as its been said before happy mummy equals happy baby.

i have have struggled again this time round. DD is almost 5 months and it has not been a pleasant experience for the same reasons you describe.  The other thing for me is i can only breastfeed lying down as i have big boobs too and any other way just doesnt work. This has restricted me heaps in terms of leaving the house.  I did lots of expressing as i could only give DD the bottle during the day for various reasons such as having to look after a toddler and DD is easily distracted by noise.  When i couldnt make enough id give her formula.  Well as of the end of last week i could feel there wasnt enough milk in the boob like before. Boobs were softer and can hardly get a drop when i express.  So for the last four days have been formula feeding and bfeeding overnight only.  Not sure if theres anything there for her drink.   So for me ive called it quits as of a few days ago and keep saying to myself i gave it my best shot, and i want to finally enjoy my baby and not spend hours expressing, boob feeding then formula feeding an withd worrying.  The best thing i gave my DD was a drug free natural birth and colostrum and i think that was the most important thing i could  offer her to start with.  She has my love and total devotion and her millions of smiles and happy nature prooves to me shes happy with how mummy is raising her. And i know just as i do with my son she'll be growing up on yummy homemade wholesome food which is just as important.

Good luck

#8 seepi

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:15 PM

Once baby starts solids (at 4 months) you can leave them with others for much longer and they can have mashed pear etc and sips of water.

Also they can go much longer without a feed - so you can take them out all day and not have to pop home for a feed every 3 hours.

You can BF to a schedule if that suits you - plenty of people do.


The pain should settle down  - the early weeks are the worst for this, although i did not have mastitis.

The recommendation was 1 year until very recently. Some still sat there is no need to feed for 2 years in countries with good nutrician for kids.

So I'd aim for 6 months, and see how you go, and if all is going much better go for 12 months.

good luck with it!





#9 poss71

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:22 PM

I usually avoid this section because of difference of opinion about whether it's OK to put your own needs up there on a par with baby's...

I imagine you are tired, miserable and feeling pretty isolated. You are not alone!

For a start, it shouldn't hurt. If it does, this is something that should be investigated further. Don't just accept that "the latch is fine" comment - there could be a variety of reasons for the pain: thrush, infection, high palate or tongue tie and so on. Pursue the reason and get some true support that doesn't just say "it looks fine to me" - that's not support.

Secondly, you can routine feed if you want to. If your baby is getting enough in one feed to fill her stomach, you should soon be able to get to a point where you can judge how long it will be until the next feed is due - that's a routine. It might be 4 hourly, 3 hourly, or 2 1/2 hourly, and probably will vary over the course of the day, no matter, it will be reasonably consistent.

I can't comment on the mastitis issue, only a thought that it may be connected with the pain?

You don't have to get out, but if you do, try feeding just before you go out - that way, feeding in public is one less thing to worry about.

Clothing sucks when your body has changed so dramatically. When DD2 was about 4 months old, I found a lovely lady at DJs whose sister had just had a baby - she pulled together a huge bunch of clothes for me to try on and basically showed me what would suit my "new shape". It gave me confidence to trust that I would look OK again one day!

Try offering a bottle once a day. That way, you can express over the rest of the feeds to get a full feed's equivalent - and someone else can do it, if you want an occasional break. Or, skip the guilt and give her a bottle of formula once a day. Apparently, this is a slippery slope to fully formula feeding shrug.gif - I don't see why, if you wish to continue breastfeeding for your baby's wellbeing, you can't take a break yourself. Even if you put a limit on it, say two weeks of one formula bottle a day, that's a bunch of feeds you can rest for...

QUOTE
So my follow on question is how long can you breastfeed for to get the maximum amount of benefit for the least amount of time? I know the ideal is 2 years, but is there any research on the amount of benefit gained from 6 weeks, 12 weeks, 6 months, 1 year?

If 3 months is only slightly less beneficial than 6 months, or 6 weeks only slightly less beneficial than 12 weeks, I'd like to know so I can make an informed decision.

2 years is the WHO recommendation, which includes 3rd world countries (no safe drinking water etc). By 2 years old, most children in the western world still breastfeeding would be having one or two drinks a day - and it's not their main source of nutrition. Try feeding to 4 months, then consider your options at that time.

Instead of making it all or nothing, try to continue as long as you comfortably can, but take some pressure off yourself in doing so. It gets easier to breastfeed once you know your baby better and as she gets the hang of feeding too (it's a learning process for both of you).

Please don't give up altogether and feel bad about it. Try to take some pressure off for a while and then see if that helps. If it doesn't, then make a decision about feeding your baby at that time - without worrying about what others might think.

Good luck. You will make the right decision. Just don't kill yourself trying to live up to other people's expectations.

#10 Guest_holy_j_*

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:22 PM

I hated hated hated breastfeeding for all 3! I had no problems apart from a massive oversuppply with child 2 (think i could express over 300ml after a feed and all day i would just be dripping wet and it was gross not to mention constantly choking my child and having her dripping wet in winter wasn't really ideal) It just irritated me. But i did it anyway. I ended up feeding for 2-3 months then expressing into bottle as much as i could be bothered until almost 6 months with the first one, then around 4.5 months was the last time the next two got any breastmilk. I was much happier expressing and feeding from bottles.

#11 BetteBoop

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:22 PM

Yes I hated the early days too. My milk didn't come in for 2 weeks and I got cracked nipples from trying to feed without milk.

I got repeated mastitis from having too much milk.

When I was in hospital, a particularly nice midwife told me that colostrum was the best thing to give your baby and if I absolutely had to give up, then at least she had gotten that.

She suggested I aim for 6 weeks and said there were the biggest health advantages up until then. Once I got there, I didn't want to give up and lasted for 1 year.

Just like carrying the baby, it's inconvenient for as long as you do it and your body is not your own. The thing is, it's worth the inconvenience because of the benefits for the baby.

#12 bronzzeAngel

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:23 PM

you stopped having onion garlic and coffee? oh no...

I never stopped the first two as I ate it while pregnant and continued doing so afterwards with no ill effects. You have to think some people stop eating hot foods, but what of babies born to people who have no coice but to eat hot things as it s a cultural thing eg indians eating hot food..

And as for coffee, my son had to be on caffiene to get his breathing happening deeper so I just kept on drinking coffee with no ill effect on him as he was a very sound sleeper. it is only when they are not sleeping that it is a worry..

Expressing is a skill and if you learn the tricks, you can do it probably quicker and it will give you more time to yourself.
Though I used to express one side while feeding in the morning with my middle son and that was his early evening feed that night so I could cook tea or nip out to the shops in the afternoon as the next feed was the bottle, so I could have coffee with friends and leave the baby with his dad.

It is better you feed as long as you can, but once they start solids the breastfeeds drop any way. I was feeding only 3 times a day just before breakfast lunch and tea when my boy was still feeding. he then had his solids and he was happy.
But if you can make it to 6 months then you have done a fantastic job.
Have you havd you babe checked for tongue tie adn even apartial tongue tie will affect attachment and cause pain.. or maybe try nipple shield, I found they worked wonders..



#13 Nasty Bunsen

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:38 PM

Sometimes I hate breastfeeding, it's bloody hard!

It's your decision how long to persevere but don't feel guilty if you've given it your best shot and you've had enough - the most important thing for your baby is to have a happy mum, a bad experience with breastfeeding can quickly lead you down the road to post natal depression in my experience.

My first experience with breastfeeding was 6 weeks of pain, 6 weeks of enjoying it, then the pain returned and I gave up after a couple of weeks as I was dreading every feed. Second time around it has been easier but he won't take a bottle so I am trapped doing every feed, so I do sympathize with much of your post.

Hydrogel breast pads are great to heal cracked sore nipples, it's so hard to work out if your latch is correct if it hurts anyway because the damage hasn't healed properly.

Are you restricting foods because bub has reacted or because you think you should? Unless bub is having problems relax and eat what you like!

Give yourself time to become comfortable feeding in public, it does get easier and in the meantime plan a few outings where you know you can feed privately so you are getting out of the house - even if it's just to the shops where you know there are parent rooms.

Same with sex, your breasts will feel less full and leaky in time and you might start to feel more sexy then.

Have you considered giving the occasional bottle of formula? It will ease the pressure on you and may keep you breastfeeding for longer in the long run.

Not sure on this myself as I have always demand fed but is the any reason you can't routine feed on the breast? If you are feeding often enough I would think it wouldn't affect your supply?

I know how hard it is to give up on breastfeeding when milk supply is not the issue (my problems stemmed from having too much milk) please don't be too hard on yourself, breast is best but formula is a good second when you need to keep your sanity!

#14 TheAP

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:40 PM

OP you've given a number of reasons for why you hate breastfeeding so my question is this -

With all the reasons you've stated and the age of your baby, if you gave up breastfeeding right now would you feel guilty about it tomorrow?

If not, then you know the right course of action for you and your baby.

I read a lot of posts written by women who are "made" to feel guilty about not breasfeeding but I really think that if you weigh the pro's and con's and make the right decision for you and your baby then you have nothing to feel guilty about.

For me, in those early days, I made the decision to keep breastfeeding but I know that had I made a different decision in the circumstances we were in I would not have felt guilty for a single second.

Breastfeeding is really hard especially in the beginning but for most women it does get easier. And IME there's nothing better or more hilarious than breastfeeding a toddler who is starting to communicate with words.

#15 lucky 2

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:45 PM

QUOTE
I know breast is best, but surely at some point the negative effect on the mother (and therefore her relationship with baby) must outweigh the benefit of breast milk?


Only you will know the answer to the question above.
The problem is that bfing your bub is not problem free at 5 weeks, something truly is NQR for it to hurt you (ie NQR with positioning or attachment or bubs mouth, the list of possible issues could go on) and the fact that you have suffered further complications (blocked ducts and mastitis) are evidence of something being NQR at the oro-boobular interface! So it hurts and it shouldn't but your LC says its fine but its not otherwise you wouldn't get pain and poor milk flow and infection.
Sounds horrid and could you get access to a different LC for a 2nd opinion?
As for expressing, any amount of bm in the diet is better than none and some pumps are duds and others are great. Which one do you use?
I'd try and seek a 2nd opinion.
It's not meant to be like this.
Sometimes it does take a while to "get better".
Sometimes health practitioners have their limits and are unable to give you the help that you need.
Sometimes it is hard to know what the problem is.
If you have a good double electric pump then expressing instead of feeding with pain is a good option.

I didn't have ongoing issues like you, but at 5 weeks there is time to get it sorted (if it can be sorted).
I didn't enjoy every feed but it did get easier and comfortable and therefore "doable".
Suffering each feed is not normal or desirable.
You have a bfing problem, it's not your fault, you have sought help but it hasn't worked, ? yet.
You shouldn't enjoy what is painful, now that would be odd.
You are normal and responding appropriately in a difficult situation.
You can see why many women do not continue to bf, but I hope you can find some more help and be able to continue to bf without pain or suffering.
And express if you have to, to avoid damage from bubs mouth.
Wishing you all the best.

oh, and eat onion and garlic and drink coffee, perhaps just limit it to less than 3 a day. Caffeine is not contraindicated in bfing.

#16 Neen

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:48 PM

It's hard.  And so not easy!  

It took me 10-12 weeks to settle into a rhythm with each of my three babies.  During those 10-12 weeks it was a nightmare with cracked nipples, mastitis a few times, nipple thrush, vasospasm... you name it I had it.  And flat nipples.

But the first time around I was determined - I think in part due to having an emergency caesar I thought I wanted to do something naturally.  Anyway, after persisting through those awful weeks and getting to the other side where it is a lovely bonding time, I then persisted with #2.  

Then with #3 a few years later I was so scared it was going to be awful for those first 10-12 weeks, and it was!  Not because I didn't know what I was doing, but for some reason I must be prone to mastitis.  My nipples are still flat so get cracked and a newborn finds it hard to attach.  I took it one day at a time, one feed at a time.  So many times I was ready to quit.

Anyway, I'm rambling.  But I persisted with #3 as well and he is now 10 months and feeding three times a day (pretty routinely) and I'm really pleased I stuck it out.

It's up to you.  You've come this far and it does settle down and babies do get into a routine after a few months.  So if you decide to keep going be encouraged that it will get easier and more enjoyable!


Edited to add... if you are experiencing pain, but have a good latch, it's possibly nipple thrush.  Especially if you've had mastitis you can be prone to it.  I had it really badly this time around and it was undiagnosed for quite a while as we were also having latching problems so thought that was the pain.  Anyway, the longer it goes on the harder it is to get rid of.  I'd suggest starting straight away on something like Inner Health acidopholus capsules a couple of times a day.  If you don't get better very soon then see a doctor who knows what they are talking about as you might need to tackle it another way.

Edited by Neen, 17 May 2011 - 11:56 PM.


#17 Guest_~Aine~_*

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:49 PM

Firstly - it does get better.

Secondly - it shouldn't still hurt that much after 5 weeks.  If it does, then you've probably got an attachment problem.  If you can be strong enough to keep asking for help, then you'll probably end up at a stage where it doesn't hurt.  And I bet at that point the rest of the negatives will melt away.



#18 Expelliarmus

Posted 17 May 2011 - 11:59 PM

I hated breastfeeding. I did it for 7 months, 10 months and 16 months respectively. Hated it the entire time. I weaned #1 because she kept pulling off the boob and she'd been having bottles since birth due to cracked nipples, so I had them and it was there and it was easier than the pain of pulled nipples.

#2 I kept trying to wean her from about 5 months but she was stubborn. I had to wrap her and hold her down with the bottle in her mouth so she would get off my boobs. *shudders* It was so painful.

Guess what though? They had BAD attachment. Since found out they have a congenital jaw issue from their father which has misshapen their jaw. All the nursey people gave me the attachment thumbs up ....

Fail.

#3 I went so long because his jaw isn't nearly as bad - it's almost normal and he didn't cause me pain beyond the first 2ish weeks. I just got bored of breastfeeding. he weaned himself though as I kept at it due to it being best - but the only reason i could was because it didn't hurt. I would go see a Lactation consultant and double, triple check it. Did either you or DH have braces and what for? Could she have a jaw issue? I mean my kids looked/look completely normal but the older tow have had significant dental issues with their jaw width and hinge.

Of course it stuffed up their feeding.

It's ok to hate it. i always did. It's okay to stop and it's okay to keep going, only you know what's best for you. Good Luck.

#19 JinksNewton

Posted 18 May 2011 - 12:01 AM

QUOTE
For a start, it shouldn't hurt. If it does, this is something that should be investigated further. Don't just accept that "the latch is fine" comment - there could be a variety of reasons for the pain: thrush, infection, high palate or tongue tie and so on. Pursue the reason and get some true support that doesn't just say "it looks fine to me" - that's not support.


THere could be reasons, yes, but you CAN have a perfectly fine attachment and still have it hurt. I had a painful letdown for the first 6 weeks after DS was born so the beginning of every single feed was wince-worthy. I know many other women who had the same issue, so I think the whole "If you are attached correctly, it won't hurt" is a bit of a myth, and a harmful one at that.

All that being said, I was another who found that at 6 or 7 weeks, it just stopped hurting. Can you hang in there for just a few more weeks? You might find the pain just stops fairly soon.

Regarding the foods you gave up, was there a reason, or did you just stop because you thought you should? I drank caffeine in moderation and ate garlic and onion quite happily with no issues. I did stop eating a couple of things but only after DS actually reacted to them (oats being the main offender)

Lastly, I do get what you mean by lack of routine...it's hard when you lose control of your life. The thing is, your LO's feeds will probably start becoming more regular pretty soon and TBH even without demand feeding you are pretty much at the mercy of your baby's routines....I can't count the number of things I've been late for because DS has decided to have an extra long nap! I think small kids = a loss of control over your life, and it's something you do have to live with to a certain extent, BF or not BF. It stressed me out in the early days, because I am a monster for punctuality, but eventually I just relaxed and went with it...much easier really.

Lastly, I was a 16 F while BF too....not easy, but you do figure out ways around it.

#20 ~Nic~

Posted 18 May 2011 - 12:14 AM

QUOTE (Smyla80 @ 17/05/2011, 11:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
OP you've given a number of reasons for why you hate breastfeeding so my question is this -

With all the reasons you've stated and the age of your baby, if you gave up breastfeeding right now would you feel guilty about it tomorrow?

If not, then you know the right course of action for you and your baby.

I read a lot of posts written by women who are "made" to feel guilty about not breasfeeding but I really think that if you weigh the pro's and con's and make the right decision for you and your baby then you have nothing to feel guilty about.


cclap.gif  cclap.gif


Perfectly said. I wish you had have been around here to post that message when I was in the same boat as the OP.


OP - I was EXACTLY the same as you. I cried every single feed without fail. I made my lips bleed because I would sit there biting my bottom lip during every feed. As soon as my bub started looking like he was ready for a feed, I would sit down and cry. I hated it.

For me personally, I took what a lot of people would have seen as the easy way out. I switched to formula. I am telling you right now though, it was not an easy choice. I felt so guilty as I know and will never dispute that breast milk is the best thing for a baby. Unfortunatley though, sometimes it not just a question of just what's best for the baby. I had other kids to look after, and I couldn't be there for them (as well as my amazingly patient husband) and look after myself if I was a sobbing mess on the floor 20 hours a day.

Here is a link to a thread that I had a couple of years ago when I was pregnant with DS3 - slightly different situation, as I was considering not breastfeeding him at all, but there are quite a few replies in there that I found to be very helpful, and will hopefully help you out a little as well.
EB thread


Good luck and please know that you are not alone - trust me, you are not the only one to feel like this, and whatever decision you make, don't feel like you have to explain yourself to anyone.


Nic.

#21 dejoey

Posted 18 May 2011 - 12:15 AM

I can tell you what happened to me, disreguard anything not relevent.

DD1 sounds similar to your bubs. Would not feed, lots of pain, mastitis 3 times in two weeks. It was getting to the point where I couldn't even look at her. I had lost a baby the previous year, and could not understand that something I wanted to do so badly for my child, for her benefit, and because I loved her so much was not working. She screamed all the time, and would instantly settle for DP. Anyway, we went on a break to the coast, one of DP's mates saw me suffering with mastitis etc, went down the street and bought formula. He gave it to the baby, and she drank the whole thing. He then said to me (as I was probably crying) that there is more to being a mum, than just BF. If it was causing this much stress and pain, and the bub was missing out on enjoying time with mum, then it was not the end of the world to feed her a bottle. So she was bottle fed from then.

On saying that, I really wanted to BF my next child, so DS was BF. I am currently BF my bubs now too, 7mths and going strong. I guess what i am trying to say is that sometimes if it is not working, and your relationship with the baby is suffering, then its not such a bad thing to stop.

I also agree with PP to try and give your baby breastmilk for as long as you feel you can, be it in a bottle, or from your breast.

Also feeding in public is something I have never become accustomed to. Its not something that is looked upon fondly where I am from. I bought a Teega (I actually saw someone on here mention it first). This allows me to be completely covered in public, i can see the baby's attachment etc, but noone can see any part of me, they wouldn't normally see.
Good Luck with your decision, and your honesty is refreshing biggrin.gif

#22 Not Escapin Xmas

Posted 18 May 2011 - 12:31 AM

I'm 5 weeks in like you. I'm using a nipple shield, which really helps. A good lactation consultant won't think that you should just put up with pain. If you're in Sydney I can give you the details of mine, she's been great.

#23 poss71

Posted 18 May 2011 - 12:32 AM

QUOTE (redkris @ 18/05/2011, 01:01 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
THere could be reasons, yes, but you CAN have a perfectly fine attachment and still have it hurt. I had a painful letdown for the first 6 weeks after DS was born so the beginning of every single feed was wince-worthy. I know many other women who had the same issue, so I think the whole "If you are attached correctly, it won't hurt" is a bit of a myth, and a harmful one at that.

Look at it this way, why should anyone keep doing something that causes that much pain? If it can't be fixed, then that's the time to look at whether or not you are willing to put up with the pain. For goodness sake, please don't just accept that people who say "it shouldn't hurt" are perpetuating a myth.


#24 JinksNewton

Posted 18 May 2011 - 12:45 AM

QUOTE
Look at it this way, why should anyone keep doing something that causes that much pain? If it can't be fixed, then that's the time to look at whether or not you are willing to put up with the pain. For goodness sake, please don't just accept that people who say "it shouldn't hurt" are perpetuating a myth


I get what you're saying, it's just that I have known women who were so sure they were doing something wrong, or weren't attaching their baby correctly because they'd been told if they were doing it right it wouldn't hurt. As I said, for most of them it stopped at around week 6 (I don't know why week 6), and maybe if the OP could just hang on for a couple more weeks it might calm down a little. If not, well, she has given her baby a great start, and FF might be a good way to go if she still hates it as much.

I wish someone had told me about it because I was in tears quite often in the early weeks thinking I was stuffing it up.




#25 NannyPlum

Posted 18 May 2011 - 12:52 AM

I understand OP but unlike you I didn't tough it put for as long as you have.

I ended up in hospital with mastitis in my nipples. Think blood clots coming out of my nipple  cry1.gif sick.gif

I expressed for 3 weeks but when I had to go to hospital I had to have a test for clots on my lung which meant I couldnt use my breast milk for 24hrs afterwards. DS had already gone all day on formula and was much happier so we decided to stay with formula.




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