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September 2010 Parent group #16

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#126 wingless_angel

Posted 27 October 2011 - 02:43 PM

Hi girls scan went well I am 10wks and 6days. I haven't spoken to dh yet he was there but walked out at the end jumped in his car took and off he didn't say a word so waiting for him to come home so we can talk.

#127 Allymeg69

Posted 27 October 2011 - 03:25 PM

QUOTE (wingless_angel @ 27/10/2011, 02:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi girls scan went well I am 10wks and 6days. I haven't spoken to dh yet he was there but walked out at the end jumped in his car took and off he didn't say a word so waiting for him to come home so we can talk.

Hi Wingless, glad it went "well", I take it you mean that things appear healthy with bub, that's great. As for your DH, don't let him guilt you, as he very well knows it takes 2, and if he allowed things to "get a bit lax" as you said earlier then he has to accept his responsibility in the result. I hope you were able to have a good talk with your mum and that you find support there. Sending you big hugs  bbighug.gif

#128 wingless_angel

Posted 28 October 2011 - 06:28 AM

Sorry Ally yes I meant everything looked healthy 2 arm 2 legs a head and heart rate of 170bpm. I am pleased everything was where it should of been I am really concerned about the amount of drinking I have done but I have done a bit of research and I don't think there is much we can tell why I am pregnant unless there is a major deformity. I am going to try and book in for my 12wk scan today I just hope it isn't to late. DH finally came home and has hardly spoken 2 words to me didn't even mention the scan I think he has realised there is no way I will terminate especially at this stage of pregnancy. I don't know if I did the right thing letting him come back after what he. I made the decision after I heard he was partying most nights drinking and living the single life. He seemed to get a get out of jail free card while I was left picking up the pieces he would call during the day apologising about what he had done beg to see the kids so I would let him cone round after work then all of a sudden he would say he had to go it wasn't to later I realised it was because he had planned another big night out. So I said **** this if he wants to make it work he can come back home and start living and dealing with the pain he has caused me and the kids. Why should he be the one that seemed to be living carefree while I had all the responsibity and dealing constantly with what he had caused. Anyway as I said I don't know if it was the right thing but he is 41 and it is time for him to man up a bit.

#129 Sares83

Posted 28 October 2011 - 07:37 AM

So happy the scan looked good and bubs is OK. I don't know what advice to offer in regards to DH, I agree he needs to step up and be a responsible adult. He is not a child although it sounds like he is acting like one and being very selfish. Normally I would say the decision to have a baby is to be made by both partners but I guess this is a bit tricky because this one is already on the way and I know I wouldn't be able to terminate what appears to be a perfectly healthy baby. In your case it would obviously be different if the 12 week scan showed a high risk of downs syndrome, with already having a special needs child that would be something you would really need to think about if you could cope but at the moment, I would be the same as you and would be keeping that baby no matter what, so long as you realise whilst it is your body and you can make the final decision about keeping this baby, you can't ignore DH's wishes and you may have to be prepared to accept you will lose him altogether as a result. I don't want to be all doom and gloom but I think it is something you need to consider.

keep us posted

#130 wingless_angel

Posted 28 October 2011 - 11:15 AM

Patricksmum I totally agree with everything you said at the moment DH is acting like a spoilt child. I do believe it should be a joint decision but he is only in one frame of mind about it and obviously not willing to listen to my side. Ally is right also he is trying to bully me by giving me the silent treatment and making me feel bad about my decision. Though yesterday just confirmed my feelings seeing little bubba in there kicking away and seeing those beautiful little hands we could make out all five fingers it was amazing. I am more than willing to do it by myself he can either stay and support me or go I have warned him before to never make me choose between him and my children as he will never win. I booked my scan for the 10th of November I will be 12wks and 6 days can't wait to see my little bubba again. Anyway better go Claire is being so naughty today and I need to pack I am lacking complete motivation to do it I have only packed 2 boxes and we move in 8 days I better get a move on.

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