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Early Menopause Support Group
TTC or not, this group is for you

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#1 Freckles

Posted 07 December 2011 - 01:01 PM

Hi there,

There has been a number of requests for an early menopause BG. Some of the requests have come from those who are actively TTC whilst others are past that point in their lives. After discussion with Mintie(mod) we decided to start a thread here, so that it is not in a TTC specific area. I will pin this group for the time being and see how it goes. original.gif

If there are any problems please PM me or use the report (!) button if it is urgent.



#2 embracingIVF

Posted 07 December 2011 - 06:55 PM

hi ladies

i have been told it is on the cards fairly soon - i am 35 have done 5 rounds of ivf and had on DD along the way - amh is very low and fsh is getting higher

super keen to hear how others are going out there  wub.gif

#3 ~Kee~In~Hawaii~

Posted 10 December 2011 - 12:02 PM


I was going to PM you Embracing (after the first MASSIVE pm I sent you went haywire - I am not sure why PM's are being sent without the text) but rather than re-type my whole life story again there, I may as well type it here as a little introduction of myself for others who will hopefully soon join us.

I'm Kee ... and will hopefully get my old profile back once I email admin again, but in the meantime ...

I was 27 when my cycle started doing strange things. I ended up down to a 24 day cycle and the doctor was worried. He dropped the words "early menopause" into the mix which had me huh.gif but he didn't carry out any testing, just advised we move our TTC plans forward. We decided to follow his advice and began TTC before we were married in Feb 2007.

Flash forward 2 years and we had moved from Adelaide to Qld and back for DH's work and had been messed around by doctors who seemed incapable of making a decision to test for anything let alone make an actual diagnosis. Upon returning to SA and going back to my trusted GP, I was referred to a FS at the local public hospital for tests. Ultrasounds and blood tests were performed and as a last minute thought, the FS said I should get DH to do a semen sample for analysis to cover all bases. The results came back that DH's sperm count was well below 1 million (a normal healthy range would be over 20 million). We were then referred to a private fertility/IVF clinic and so began more prodding and testing but this time for both of us. Part of that involved DH having a testicular ultrasound to see if there was any cause for his low count - like a blockage. I went in with him for that and it has to be the worst day of my life bar-none. Sitting in that chair while the nurse performed the ultrasound and seeing that black mass appear on the tv screen sent my stomach to the floor. I nearly threw up. I had dealt with the horrible demise of my Grandfather to cancer and I knew only too well what cancer looked like in an ultrasound. The nurse had begun our session saying we could get the results from our FS at our appointment in a month and ended it saying we should call tomorrow as they would courier the scans there and that we needed to talk to the FS right away. Her change in attitude only cemented my belief that we were dealing with something awful. The worst part was not saying anything to scare DH as I was only going on hints from the nurse and my own previous cancer dealings.

The FS confirmed my fears that it was, indeed, a tumor of some sort. After that, all focus was on DH. I do remember that the original FS at the public hospital had said my results were ok and then it was all about DH's low count. With the focus on DH more now than ever, I didn't think to ask our new private clinic FS to elaborate on my results. DH had to have surgery asap as testicular tumors cannot be aspirated to test if they are cancerous or not. The only step is to remove the testicle and test afterwards. He began a 3 week procession of visiting the sperm bank to make sure he had enough "samples" frozen for the future IVF we now knew was our only option.

4 weeks after the awful scan and DH was in hospital having his surgery. Though the tumor was cancerous, it hadn't spread to his lymph nodes and so he was one of the VERY lucky ones. He had one round of chemo to be safe (horrid stuff) and has since been all clear.

It was 12 months to the day since his diagnosis when he was given the ok to pursue IVF/ICSI so we went straight back to the fertility clinic to begin. Again I was given baseline hormone tests but not really told any results. I just believed that if something else was wrong, they wouldn't be letting us go ahead with a cycle.

My god, how much does IVF suck?! How anyone does it more than once is beyond me. I couldn't stand it and the drugs had a really bad reaction with me. I began to feel bi-polar because I could go from hysterical laughter to frenzied anger and then uncontrollable sobbing. I threw a washing basket across the room at DH because I didn't like the way he looked at me and in the time the washing flew across the room and hit him, I had gone from enraged at him to laughing at the way the clothes looked flying through the air. In short, I went nuts.

It looked like I had 10 or 12 developing follicles at each ultrasound but when I woke up from my embryo transfer, I only had 7 "ok-ish" eggs. Yep, that's what the nurse called them ... "ok-ish". I had read somewhere that 6 eggs and lower on the high-dosage medicated cycle I was on was a bad sign of possible ovarian failure. Getting 7 gutted me. There was a girl in the bed next to me at the hospital who was doubled over from OHSS and in agony but the doctor told her she got 45 eggs. I would have given anything right then for that same pain and discomfort so long as I also had so many eggs.

In the 5 days between EPU and the transfer, all but one egg died. Some didn't make it to fertilisation and some stopped dividing after fertilisation without becomming blastocysts. One little embryo was still going on the day of transfer - just. The embryologist said it wasn't as many cells as they would like in a blasty before transfer but "hopefully" it would continue to divide in me and then implant in my uterus to become a viable pregnancy. It didn't.

DH was annoyed (we both knew it was a possibility for IVF to not work but we began to look back on the cycle as a whole and become really annoyed at what we felt was a lack of information and communication) so he asked that we change clinics and we went back to a public fertility centre. The FS there requested our paperwork from the private FS and with one look at the results, he sent me for more bloodwork. He said my original hormone levels were that of a 50 year old woman and why hadn't we done more to harvest and store eggs in the 12 months that DH was getting well?? BECAUSE WE DIDN'T KNOW WE SHOULD! rant.gif It had all been about DH (rightly so) but no-one told me I wasn't as good as I should have been, fertility-wise.

The follow up bloods confirmed an AMH level below 1 and the new FS said we were welcome to use the small remaining amount of DH's frozen sperm to try ICSI again but with only 7 eggs last time and even lower hormones now, it had even less chance of success than before. I asked if we could go home and think about what to do from here and the FS gave us a MAXIMUM of one month to think about it before he wouldn't be comfortable progressing as he thought I only had another month or so before I'd be officially into early menopause. We spent that month not talking about it and then knew it was too late. It was over. Without having to say it out loud, we'd given up that dream and moved on.

That was in March this year and now, 8 months later my cycle is a lot longer and my AF is 1, maybe 2 days, extremely light, crampy and I don't remember the last time I had any o pains. I think my ovaries have definitely handed in their resignations now.

I was offered further tests to monitor the decline but I don't want them. I know my body is shutting off and I don't need pieces of paper to tell me that. I have night sweats every now and then and general moodiness (Chill Pill's have been GREAT!) but now the latest development this week is extrememly oily/greasy skin. My face is a grease pit. I have been using mud-masks, eggs (??), and even oil minimising lotion - which of all things is called "Youth Soloutions" and is aimed at teenage skin, making my "old womans" issues so much easier to deal with rolleyes.gif . Today I seem to have gotten on top of it a little, just in time for a big party I have to attend tonight.

So that's me ... started off onto the path of IVF due to a lack of sperm and ended it due to a lack of eggs. At least for DH and I, we are both "faulty" so there's no feeling that one of us is holding the other back from having kids. Friends of mine broke up when the wife was diagnosed as having damaged ovaries/uterus so even IVF/donor eggs was out of the question and the husband couldn't cope with that and went off to be with a younger woman - who has since had his baby. There's no blame game possible here and, knowing that and the fact that we are lucky to have DH rather than unlucky to not have a baby, we are doing well. We love travelling and so we are focussed on seeing the world rather than dwelling on what was never meant to be.

Life is good at the moment - apart from telling people I am in menopause at 31 years of age and getting a look like I said I was a contagious leper and then dealing with the stupid questions and the annoying symptoms.

Sorry I babbled on, but that's the intro over with. I look forward to sharing more in future as we all come to grips with what our bodies are doing to us and sharing tips on ways to make the whole transition easier.

#4 embracingIVF

Posted 12 December 2011 - 12:26 PM

sicily/kee farout what a journey... i am so sorry you have had to go through so much of a hit with both of you...
are you on hrt? how are you finding that helping the symptons? the doctors have just said if i take the pill once my eastrogen drops i won't notice much until i come off it when i am 50 - none of it makes sense
i am really not coping with this diagnosis at the moment
just feel so depressed by it all
my mother literally just finished menopause

so strange that my dh also had testicular cancer too - but that was before i met him - long while back - so we knew ivf was our only option - we did it 3 times to get our DD but it was a rocky road as all my eggs were immature/ faulty the first two times but aside from that my levels were normal

when we came back earlier this year my fsh was 23  cry1.gif and we have just done two horrible failed cycles with nothing to transfer as my eggs again immature/ faulty and now apparent oncoming menopause
i know i will come to terms with it all in time but right now i just feel so devaststed by it all  sad.gif

am desperately trying chinese herbs to see if i can magically fix up my body a bit before the next set of tests...

#5 pepdat

Posted 16 August 2017 - 10:56 AM

Hi There, Its been a very long time since I have posted anything on here and so I am not sure if I am posting in the right area - sorry If this is the case.

I am looking for some feedback.

I am 41 and I have missed my period I'm up to day 47, this has never happened to me.  I am NOT trying to conceive, but I have had a blood test done just to confirm and it came back negative and so did several urine tests.
I do however have PCOS, but my cycle is regular, its a longer cycle of 35 days but regular in that way.
My gyno wants to see me tomorrow to run some tests  and I am really worried now. what on earth could it be??
I feel periody, the usual sore boobs, lower back pressure but I'm really emotional too - Of course I have googled (which I know I shouldn't but I did) and peri menopausal came up as well as ovarian cancer - can someone here give me any reassurance or have a similar story.

thanks for listening.


#6 Veritas Vinum Arte

Posted 16 August 2017 - 03:06 PM

I can't help but I had irreg cycles 35-84 d long (conceived on 35d, 49d and 42d cycles), but mine have gone the other way.... I am now getting 21-25d cycles.

Dr took bloods which showed high prolactin levels, so had an MRI which showed no tumour.

Next Prolactin test was lower(but still elevated) so Dr said not to worry.

I pushed for a referral to an Endocrinologist. I saw them yesterday. They said high prolactin for me could still be a tumour which didn't show up on MRI (8% don't), but most likely associated with general hormone imbalance as she pointed out many of my levels were post menopauseal. She thinks undiagnosed PCOS so is putting me on metformin to try and bring my hormones in line which hopefully will bring my periods back to normal and prolactin.

If not then I will go with the treatment for prolactin tumour.

Also she notes I could be going into early menopause.

Life is fun. I have just turned 43 Sunday.

#7 lisajane666

Posted 19 October 2017 - 10:56 PM

Hi I'm 38 in December and have left crazy, had some hot flushes and new something was up.  I had my bloods done earlier this year but nothing showed up.  After a panic attack last week I went back to my doctor who re did the tests which now shows that I'm in early menopause.

I need to have more tests done to confirm and check for any other issues.  The doctor has mentioned HRT and I need to look into everything.

I'm looking for any advice, where to look for information.


#8 lisajane666

Posted 18 February 2018 - 10:41 AM


I’m 38 and started peri menopause over a year ago.  I have just started Qlaira (day 5) and today I just want to cry and hide but I have a family, dogs and adulting to do.

#9 ECsMum

Posted 18 February 2018 - 12:56 PM

Can I ask what the reason for the test to confirm menopause for those that aren't TTC is?

#10 lisajane666

Posted 18 February 2018 - 03:13 PM

For me it was the feeling of being crazy, my brain was all over the place, I was no longer organised and just felt like my brain was running.  The last thing before my tests were done is I had several panic attacks, which has never happened to me before.  Now that I have been tested there are a few symptoms that I didn’t recognise, such as constipation, excess gas, and I had to up my dosage of anti depressants.

Edited to say my mum went thru perimenopause around 40 so I knew it was coming

Edited by lisajane666, 18 February 2018 - 03:21 PM.

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