[Mary83]

Hi All

I know that a lot of you have been through this so I hoping someone may be able to give me some advice?

A brief summary:
Me 28 DH 32 both healthy, fit and well. Have been TTC for 17 months now.

After numerous test we found DH to have very poor sperm - just below average in count and motility but only 1% normal morphology. This was very hard to accept - especially for my DH. He feels as if he has failed. Seeing him cry and apologise to me was simply terrible.
I wish that the problem had of been with me as I think we are built to deal with these things better.

We had an appointment with IVF Australia last week and they advised that the best way forward would be ICSI. I know this FS is supposed to be the best but I couldn't help but feel like we were talking to an IVF Salesman. He told us diet, menevit, lifestyle wouldn't change a thing - IVF is the only option. And maybe it is - I just don't know??

He then told me that the chances of becoming PG through IVF were 40%. I know nothing is 100% but I honestly thought it would be higher than that! I apologise for my lack of knowledge - I really never expected this, I am sure no one does, but it just sux

I would love to hear from anyone that has been in this position or even gone ahead with ICSI as I just don't know what I am in for.

My FS also suggested I start as soon as I am ready - even as soon as my next period! The thought of the whole thing is just freaking me out!

Can you ever be "ready" for IVF?

[leebec]

I am on my second cycle of IVF and we will be doing ICSI this cycle. Not due to MFI but because we also on top of everything else also have a binding issue.

A short background to my IVF journey.

Natural BFP in November last year which ended in a missed m/c 3 days before christmas with a D&C. Fast forward and no AF (we fell first cycle after coming off pill). Anyway after testing, not being happy with my OB/Gyn and chaning to a new FS it was discovered I had PCOS. DH was tested and he was fine. I went through 6 months of clomid, 4 of those months was monitored cycles with clomid & trigger shots. After our 5th cycle I started pushing for IVF. We moved on to IVF last cycle and even though we got 15 eggs only 2 fertilsed and only 1 made it to transfer.

We backed up straight away (I am doing a mild ovarian stimulation through Medica so dont need to do BCP or any sniffing or anything - I can do back to back cycles if I want).

So this Thursday is my EPU and my husband will be doing his bit as well. They will be doing ICSI in the hope that we get a few more fertilised and that we can freeze.

My FS will still only doing a SET with this cycle. Going forward and frozen or fresh cycles will be DET. I am praying with all my might that this cycle works.

We have been told we have a 40% chance with any given cycle and that we have a 90% of a pregnancy after 3 fresh cycles.

I dont know what to think anymore. I am sick of having my life on hold so I am also actively pursuing a new job as I will not put up with being unhappy in my work for "what ifs" anymore.

I guess you might want to see another dr for another opinion but then again that is more waiting and it comes down to how much longer do you want to wait.

I was ready for IVF but had been on the path for a while.

ICSI is fine. The needles I have been doing are all the same no matter what. The only difference is that they inject a single sperm into the egg and it costs a bit more. We wish they would have done ICSI straight up for us but our binding issue was not something our FS was expecting.

I am grateful for my M/C in a way last year as if I had never had that I would have only just been going through testing last month and would be looking at doing my clomid journey now and would then not be where we are at now till mid next year. Although I am still not ok with my M/C we are greatful for it in a way.

I guess you & your DH are the only ones who will know if you are ready. If you want to talk or ask any more questions just PM and I am happy to go through any of it with you in more detail.

[MrsT17]

Hi Mary,

If you can ever be ready for IVF - I don't know about it. I am currently 8 days into my first IVF cycle and still feel like i am in a bit of a daze about it. I do know that i was ready to do whatever i needed to do to bring our family into this world and if that included IVF then that was what I was going to do.

I cant give you any advice as to when you should start the IVF as this is a very personal decision for both you and your DH to make, however please do not feel as though you can not ask for a second opinion. See another specialist and if you dont want to rush into IVF maybe think about seeing a natoropath or get your DH on supplements. Whether or not they do actually help, they cant hurt and my DH feels a lot better overall for taking a good multivitamin.

Obviously I cant speak from experience in regards to the 40% success for your age. I just wanted to point out that this is per cycle. I am going through Genea and their advertised statistics (whether they are true or not) state that "almost 60 per cent of our patients – regardless of age – will have a baby. And 90 per cent of these women will have a baby within three or less cycles of IVF" Now i know that this is not the case for everyone, and someone has to be the other 40% but i thought that these stats might give you a bit more hope.

Good Luck on your TTC journey, i really hope that it doesnt go on for too much longer.

[The Magic Box]

Hi Mary

If you are feeling overwhelmed by starting IVF so quickly, I'd suggest that you take some time to breathe & come to terms with it. Being in the right headspace won't make you more fertile, but if you are feeling ready & prepared it will give you a strong, stable emotional base, which can really come in handy when you're going through IVF!

With regards to getting a second opinion, absolutely. However with 1% normal morphology, I would tend to agree with your FS in saying that ICSI is really your only option. I would think that if any change could occur with alternate therapies with your husband's sperm that it would take many, many months. My husband's sperm was borderline, and we went straight to ICSI (as in, we didn't try "normal" IVF first, we did do different fertility treatments for around 18 months prior to starting IVF).

The stats they have provided seem fairly accurate. IIRC once they have transferred a fertilised embryo, you have more or less the same % chance of falling pregnant as a non-IVFer around your age would.

All the best on your journey - I hope it's a short one.

[AryaStar]

He then told me that the chances of becoming PG through IVF were 40%. I know nothing is 100% but I honestly thought it would be higher than that! I apologise for my lack of knowledge - I really never expected this, I am sure no one does, but it just sux

TBH I think if you do decide to go down the IVF route you are in for a bit of a rude shock. I don't say this to be cruel, but to break the hard news that nothing about IVF is guaranteed and the popular myth that it is a quick and simple fertility fix with a sky-high success rate is so far from the truth it would be laughable if it weren't so devastating.

Hang around these forums for a while and you will get some idea as to just how tough this journey is and that succeeding on the first cycle is the exception not the rule. You might want to look at this recent thread on how many cycles it took for people to achieve their BFPs.

http://www.essentialbaby.com.au/forums/ind...howtopic=935634

It is a horrible, gut-wrenching shock to be told that you need to do IVF - I still remember that moment vividly myself. I do think with your SA results that the FS was honest about ICSI being your best chance of success.

I wasn't ready for IVF either but held my breath and jumped in. We were very lucky in that it took only two cycles to fall with DS. In IVF terms that is bugger all and we were very lucky.

Best of luck with your decision OP.

[jules095]

He then told me that the chances of becoming PG through IVF were 40%. I know nothing is 100% but I honestly thought it would be higher than that!

Please don't get hung up on stats, or you may be in for a big surprise.

Like Shady Lane has said, IVF is NOT a quick fix. It takes around 3 cycles + associated FETs to get a BFP & although people are successful on their first cycle, many are not.

ICSI was our only option & I didn't think twice. I was prepared to do what ever it took.

You will find that you have 'a line in the sand' with what you are prepared to do, but with IVF, you need to keep an open mind, because I'm sure that 'line in the sand' will keep moving.

Good Luck.

[Red31]

Menevit can help my DH had 0% Morphology and then after menevit for 3 months it went up to 7% and next one after that was 29%

Reason for edit: Removed siggie

[nicknick]

Mary - I really agree with MagicBox, I think the best thing is to take some time and allow yourself to process it all. For us when we 1st started IVF we had been TTC for so many years, actually married around 8 years before we started so were really ready to get started but I can understand your feelings. There is no rush is the good thing, you really should start when & if you feel up to it. Regarding ICSI all of our embryos have always been ICSI'ed and there is really no difference to the cycle you will do, the only difference is in the lab with the fertilisation. These forums are wonderful to help you make the decision, lot's of woman who know exactly what you are feeling.

Goodluck with your decision.

[domestically~cha...]

For me, I was ready for IVF.

However, we TTC for 5 years before doing IVF. By then I was ready to do as many IVF cycles as it took and get into as much debt as required.

We exhausted all other natural and AC options first and by then I knew it was the only way and would be very costly and timely.

I was 25 when we started IVF and it took 2 years of IVF (8 transfers) to have success.

[k10]

** Pregnancy mentioned**

Hi Mary - I'm an IVF Aust patient and am happy for you to PM me for some futher info ... I'd be interested to know who you'r FS is there. I knew when I was 29 or 30 that we would have to do IVF due to DP's need for surgical sperm extraction. It was about 5 years before I felt I was in the right 'head space' to start. And while we have had an amazing outcome really (3 fresh cycles to conceive DS and now BFP first cycle TTC #2) in hindsight I would have started earlier as my low AMH has come into play with the journey.

Like I said, I'm very happy to chat through PMs about my experience with IVF Aust and my FS (who is fabulous and has my complete trust).

Sorry - edited to say that I've also had great success with combining acupuncture, traditional chinese medicine, supplements and chiropractic with IVF

Good luck with your decisions

This post has been edited by k10: 22/11/2011, 06:47 PM