[Soccer Mum]

A friend who is a director of a childcare centre mentioned they have quite a few kids of NESB who are toilet trained at 18 months. I was quite curious about this as I thought kids werent really physically able to hold on until they were about 2. My friend said its mainly a cultural thing - eg in Australia we normally train at 2-3 years so thats what everyone does but in some cultures the normal age is 18 months.

So Id love to hear from people who have lived in other countries. Is it common that kids are trained in some countries at 18 months?

By the way Im definately not trying to start any 'Australia is better or worse than x' type conversations. Just genuinely curious.

[haras1972]

Just to add, my mum raised 5 kids in the 70's here - 5 kids in 10 years in cloth nappies, and we were toilet training on average around 18 months.

Mum said it was early toilet training or her sanity!

So, it's also a generational thing as well I think. When I started DD in daycare at 8 months, I did orientation with another family, and their 10 month was toilet trained, as in didn't wear nappies - they were not of NESB, but had followed what I think is called elimination communication.

I read all about toilet training around the world etc about 10 months, gearing up for when I planned to toilet train, over summer last year, when DD was 2.5 yos. Lo and behold, she trained herself, before summer, at about 2 ys 3mths.... just refused to wear nappies, would take them off if we put them on, no potty, straight to the toilet - all my research and planning and bracing myself, and she did all herself.

[Leafprincess]

My brother was TT by 18 months.

He was looked after full time by our Chinese grandmother (mum worked part time). Grandma TT my brother the traditionl Chinese way.

He spent very little time in Nappies and had these onesies/pants that had a hole in the crotch, regular wee times & poo times.

I'm guessing this way of TT is extremely labour intensive as you are always having to watch the child. I don't know that it would be so practical these days given most mothers are working etc.

Pants similar to these http://www.mamaroobabysling.com/newsite/MamaRooPants.html

[soontobegran]

The definition of a toilet trained child is one who knows when their bladder and bowel are full but they can hold onto it and to take themselves to the toilet independently.
I have met many people from other countries who have described their version of toilet training and
some people use the word very loosely to describe a child who they put onto a potty or toilet following every meal or drink and catch what would have normally gone into the nappy.
IME the latter usually involves lots of effort from caregivers and too much time spent getting a red bottom from sitting when they should be playing, it also results in puddles on the floor and messes in undies.This is what I call parent training, not potty training.
My mother was held over newspaper after every breast feed and meal until she could sit independently mum said she was told that she was TT by age 1 but all she remembers endless hours sitting on a metal pot until she produced the goods.

Having said that if that is the way you want to approach TT then that is fine but I have found by waiting until they woke with dry nappies before I introduced a potty/toilet that TT was over and done with in a couple of days with no stress and no mess and no red rings around bottoms.

There is a wide range of average and some children are trained at 18 months but it is far more 'expected' to be between 2.5 and 3.5 years and longer at night for many.

I see so many parents stressed out of their mind because their children aren't trained by age 2 but they need to remember a one year old does not have cognitive development to be able to toilet themselves.

I do wish that all parents knew that TT will happen with most children in their own good time and to ignore the naysayers telling them they are lazy or blaming disposable nappies

[Soccer Mum]

I read all about toilet training around the world etc about 10 months, gearing up for when I planned to toilet train, over summer last year, when DD was 2.5 yos. Lo and behold, she trained herself, before summer, at about 2 ys 3mths.... just refused to wear nappies, would take them off if we put them on, no potty, straight to the toilet - all my research and planning and bracing myself, and she did all herself.

Thats amazing, how do I get mine to do that

I read all about toilet training around the world etc about 10 months, gearing up for when I planned to toilet train, over summer last year, when DD was 2.5 yos. Lo and behold, she trained herself, before summer, at about 2 ys 3mths.... just refused to wear nappies, would take them off if we put them on, no potty, straight to the toilet - all my research and planning and bracing myself, and she did all herself.

Thats amazing, how do I get mine to do that

[Soccer Mum]

Soon to be Gran : I'll have to ask my friend exactly what she means by the kids being toilet trained. I assume she means they go to day care in pants rather than nappies and take themselves to the toilet or otherwise indicate that they need to go .

My DD is 18 months now so I'm just starting to read about what worked for other people - but I do 'get' that I need to follow her need when she indicates she is ready. I wasnt planning to do anything until she was nearly 2 at least, as my mum strongly recommended to do toilet training in the summer!

[No girls here]

I'm with STBG.

People have different definitions of "toilet trained". I've found a lot of people (not all though) that toilet train early are constantly reminding their kids to go to the toilet, so it is partly parent training. In my opinion they're not toilet trained until they recognise themselves that they need to go, and don't need to be reminded by parents.

[Lainskii]

Apparently at Montessori daycares/preschools they toilet train the kids by 18 months.

[RatbagBob]

The other thing to take into account is that disposable nappies are a lot more comfortable on a child's bum than traditional cloth nappies, which has lead to less pressure to TT earlier because of persistent nappy rash or being sick of washing nappies and soiled clothes.

[bluedragon]

My grandmother (Australian) had my mother and her sister TTed by 12 months she says (late 1940s). She TTed me by 18 months (we were living with her at the time).

I asked mum about TTing and she said she couldn't tell me anything as grandma had done it for her lol. I was 18 months and wearing undies apparently.

I can't tell you exactly how she did it as mum doesn't know and I haven't asked my grandmother yet.

We have done a bit of elimination communication with DS. We started at 8 weeks, he is 14 months now and certainly not potty trained but that is not the point of EC. It is about being more in tune with your child and increasing the communication between you not specifically potty training them by a specific age. Also having them in clean and dry nappies as much as possible.

I don't agree with people who say babies bodies aren't able to hold on until x age etc. DS is perfectly capable of holding things until he is placed on the potty, for example if he is in training pants or naked and starts to wee, we say wait and he will stop and finish once we get him to the potty (we don't do this often but give him a little bit of nappy free time each week). He never poos in his nappy.

He has started signing to us in the last week or two and has started to sign potty. He doesn't always go when we then put him there but has a few times. I can see him starting to learn the connection (he signs > we take himto the potty) quite quickly.

Proponents of EC claim that babies are born with the instinct to not want to soil them selves and communicate this if we 'listen'. They use the example of babies vey often weeing as soon as you take the nappy of as an example of this and thinking about it DS has only done this a couple of times since we started EC while he did it quite a lot before. I didn't do it enought to find all of DSs cues, especially for wee, but did find it quite obvious to pick when he needed to poo. From very early (less than 3 months) he would stop or wait to start pooing once he realised I was taking him to the potty.

EC certainly isn't for everyone but I have found it good for us and has saved us washing as many nappies as we would have otherwise too. I hope to do it better with the next baby.

It's a very interesting question OP.