[rissa88]

my DD is 6. She is normaly a great child with the usual problems sibling rivalry with her almost 5 yr old brother. But since falling pregnant (maybe a few months before hand) shehas been acting out not uncrontrollably. But now its gone toonfar I already have problems with her brother from toilet training to speach and coping with different things. I thought a particular incident was my sons doing as it happened on a fare few occasions (TMI ALERT) wiping stool on the wall in my toilet.. I honestly thought it was my son untill after my son went to go stay with my mum to whom who has offered to help sort my son out with everything I cant do for other reasons. But yesterday my partner and I allowed my dd to go to a close friends birthday at a local park, to which one of her friends just happened tomhave been there, now I dont think its in my daughter to just do silly things but I just found out a neklace her friend was carrying around saying was hers wasnt at ll it was agift. For my friends daughter no one knew what had happpened untill my friend saw an empty gift box. If my daughter had anything to do with this I dont know what to do, I am so dissapointed in her she is normaly the smart girl who knows. Peer preasure andhow it can get people into big trouble. I don want to pwss the blame if it was my daughter but I dont want hertaking allnthe blame either. I already made her apologize to her brother for the first problem and will make her apologize to my friends and their daughter if she did have anything to do with it but indont want herto think ohnthats all I can do it again andnot be punished and only need to say sorry.. im so lost litteraly in tears (most likely hormones not helping) I dont know if its jealousy over my son going to mymums having bubcome along next year and being busy. Bedtimes havnt changed she still gets astory every night I do homework with her and been teaching her how to ride. I realy hope she didnt have anything to do with the theft

[Snagglepussed]

Tough one! But kids are pretty cluey about what is going on around them - even if they don't have all the skills to deal with the changes!
Surely the pregnancy and the fact that her brother is getting more time with your Mum would be enough (I believe) to cause some adjustment issues.
Add to that the attention (needed of course) given to your son with his other problems and there are some pretty good triggers for acting out.

I would talk to her teacher and maybe get her along to speak to the counsellor - for nothing else than for her to vent any problem she may be having but can't feel she can say anything at home...

Maybe schedule some one on one time with her - hard I know when there is so much going on!

I would also - as hard as it can be - ignore the bad behaviour - clean up the mess - give the wall a wash and the over praise other stuff that she is doing right! It will take a little while but with consistency she will see that bad behaviour is not getting her any behaviour at all and she may start to do the right thing more often to reap your praise!

It sounds like classic regression behaviour to gain some (ANY) kind of attention from you. Anger is attention and although not the best kind, maybe the only kid she feels she can garner from you right now...

it's a hard slog....

Good luck!