[*Lib*]

My daughter is in grade 2. She is just about finished the hardest of her 3 years at school. There is a clique of 4 of them and they are BFF's one minute, then they run away from each other and they are really nasty to each other. I'd like to respectfully request that my daughter not be in a class with them again next year. We've had issues all year, and I havne't got the emotional strength to help my daughter through another year of this. The kids have all been spoken to about it, my DD claims she is NEVER nasty....but we all know what kids are like

So I thought I might ask the head of jnr school for consideration when choosing classes. I never wanted to be one of those parents, always said I'd trust the school to worry about that and my DD would adjust to fit, but its so hard. We've had lots of issues getting her to go to school, and regularly coming home in tears.

We've tried to use this to teach her about not everyone being friends, but she just can't seem to distance herself from this group.....so mabye me getting involved will help.......

Do you think I should ask, or just leave it to chance?

This post has been edited by *Lib*: 16/11/2012, 05:20 PM

[mum850]

My daughter is in grade 2. She is just about finished the hardest of her 3 years at school. There is a clique of 4 of them and they are BFF's one minute, then they run away from each other and they are really nasty to each other. I'd like to respectfully request that my daughter not be in a class with them again next year. We've had issues all year, and I havne't got the emotional strength to help my daughter through another year of this. The kids have all been spoken to about it, my DD claims she is NEVER nasty....but we all know what kids are like

So I thought I might ask the head of jnr school for consideration when choosing classes. I never wanted to be one of those parents, always said I'd trust the school to worry about that and my DD would adjust to fit, but its so hard. We've had lots of issues getting her to go to school, and regularly coming home in tears.

We've tried to use this to teach her about not everyone being friends, but she just can't seem to distance herself from this group.....so mabye me getting involved will help.......

Do you think I should ask, or just leave it to chance?

Definitely ask!! Totally reasonable.

[MsNorbury]

I would ask. My DD had similar issues last year and the teacher actually requested the girs be split up. I think in this case its perfectly reasonable.

[Tigerdog]

I guess it depends on how severe it is and whether you think it actually strays into the territory of bullying for your DD. Are the teachers actually dealing with the nasty behaviours as they occur? I would expect that they would be doing so, and fairly for all concerned.

It's good that you're using this as an opportunity to teach social skills and I agree that it's easier said than done. It's easy to tell a child to just stay away from the nastiness but we forget what it's like to be a kid and to just want to be accepted, if they've been on the outer for a while then get shown some interest again of course a child is going to gravitate back toward the group.

I agree with PP, put it in writing, that way they need to respond rather than try to just brush it off.

This post has been edited by Tigerdog: 16/11/2012, 05:31 PM

[Guest_CaptainOblivious_*]

I don't see that as quite in the same category as I want/don't want X teacher.

We requested separate days at preschool for DD1 and her 'best friend'. They were going to different schools in the long run and the friend was very controlling and manipulative. We had concerns about DD1's ability to make friends with the BF on the same day.

They went different days, made new friends and lived happily ever after.

I think in your DDs case, I would make sure the teachers knew about the issue and that you'd be happy for her to be given the opportunity to make new friends.

[Puffin]

I would ask. My MIL is a retired principal and her thoughts on parents asking were that as a principal you would rather parents be on your side so to speak and have an enjoyable year, rather than having to deal with frustrated parents all year. So if at all possible to grant a parent's request regarding which class, then she would - obviously there were times when this couldn't happen for whatever reason, but she would always try.

So I guess that' a long way of saying yes, ask. You've got nothing to lose and lots to gain.

[*Lib*]

I guess it depends on how severe it is and whether you think it actually strays into the territory of bullying for your DD. Are the teachers actually dealing with the nasty behaviours as they occur? I would expect that they would be doing so, and fairly for all concerned.

Their teacher is a first year male teacher dealing with 4 b**chy little girls. He's actually been really good with them.

[jewel2]

Hubby is a primary teacher and he has always said that quite a few parents request a class or specific teacher for the next year.

School usually tries to accomodate requests if they can.

So I would contact the principal or deputy principal to make the request. Class teachers dont make the final decision.

J

[*Lib*]

I think in your DDs case, I would make sure the teachers knew about the issue and that you'd be happy for her to be given the opportunity to make new friends.

Ohhhh thats good!!!! Thank you!

This post has been edited by *Lib*: 16/11/2012, 05:35 PM

[Tigerdog]

Their teacher is a first year male teacher dealing with 4 b**chy little girls. He's actually been really good with them.

Then yes, if you feel all options have been explored re. dealing with the behaviours (which don't seem to sit with one child in particular but more the interactions within the group), then I'd definitely go ahead and make the request.

My DS1 (who is 4) and his cousin of the same age go to the same daycare, his mother and I have decided to send them to different schools and preschools from next year as they have a tendency to gang up on other kids when together (they also see each other a lot out of daycare). When they're on their own with other kids they're fine. Same at swimming lessons, they didn't get anything out the classes as they mucked around so we only had them together for one block, it was separate groups after that!

This post has been edited by Tigerdog: 16/11/2012, 05:57 PM