[dsk72]

DD started her Year 2 year brimming with confidence and exuberance at the thought of another year of learning and achieving. Her teacher, I believe, is widely liked and respected. However, DD seems to have become disliked by the teacher (according to what DD's feedback is to me), and I can't quite put my finger on the reason why. DD is quite hurt and confused as she loves her teacher.

This morning DD was in tears telling me she'd got into trouble yesterday and this is the scenario:
Teacher wrote a maths question on the board and all the kids were sitting off to the side on the mat with their own personal white boards. They were asked to write the question down and figure out the answer. DD could not see the question properly due to glare through the window, however she did her best and went to show the teacher her work. The teacher told her to go and check her work (obviously there was a mistake). So she went back to the mat and started again by re-writing the problem. Before she could complete the answer the other kids were calling out the answer (something she herself has been told off for before - calling out). So, she cleaned her board off, and as all the kids were putting their whiteboards away the teacher approached her and said (this was what my DD quoted to me several times) "Your maths is getting worse & worse. You are going to get a fright when you get your report!" Now, this all happened right before morning recess, and then straight after morning recess they had their end of year maths test.

I'm pretty cranky. I thought teachers were supposed to be encouraging, or at the least constructive. Her comments seemed to me to be aimed at eroding my DD's self confidence and scaring her about her abilities. I asked DD if teacher had asked why she hadn't completed the task - she hadn't, nor was DD given an opportunity to explain her difficulty.

But, perhaps I'm too emotionally involved - it just breaks my heart to see my little girl's heart broken by someone she is supposed to respect and appreciate.

There's been quite a number of other incidents where my DD has been singled out, undermined or ridiculed by the teacher. FWIW DD is a very bright child, who is underachieving, we are aware of that and have requested a class that is quite structured and organised for Year 3 (unlike this year which has been run more like a PrePrimary class). At the same time I made the request I noted that I'm sure there's plenty of kids who thrive in the current class environment, but my child has not and requires more struction and planning. Teacher is aware that DD has underachieved this year, and I must admit it feels a bit like Tall Poppy Syndrome to me.

Teacher has already requested a meeting with me tomorrow morning to make some notes to forward to next year's teacher, so I'll be interested to see what her point of view is. My point of view is I'd like her to go forward with a clean slate and a fresh opportunity to prove herself to her new teacher.

Anyway, all feedback or opinions will be considered, thanks for taking the time to respond.

Cheers

[erindiv]

Wow, that's a bit harsh. I remember back to my year 2 teacher, she was lovely and sweet and encouraging... even to the most annoying troublemaking brats in my grade!

What a cruel thing to say to such a small child.

[dsk72]

FWIW I intend to get the teacher's version of events as well, before completely forming my opinion. However, I think just letting her know the effects it has had on my DD (whether intentional or not) are important feedback for her.

Cheers

[baddmammajamma]

Hi Danielle:

Your poor daughter!

I think it's a good idea to have an honest talk with the teacher -- getting her version of the events but also letting her know how your daughter is feeling. Regardless of the reason (harsh teacher, overly sensitive child, or both), it is very sad that your daughter has had her confidence eroded this year. I hope that you are able to get some answers and feel better about the path for next year.

On a different note, given that your daughter is bright but underachieving, have you ever had any testing done to rule out potential learning disabilties or other issues that might be impacting her ability to process stuff in the classroom? It's not uncommon for learning disabilities and other related issues to be "masked" for a while if a child is bright (as their brightness can help them compensate to a degree). If your daughter has had ongoing issues and ongoing underachievement, it might be worth formally probing.

Good luck. I can appreciate why you are upset.

[Wigglemama]

I would see what the teacher's side of the story is but you have every right to advocate for your child. You also need to be ready to hear any feedback she may have for you. Good luck with it and please post an update

[BadCat]

If the teacher did indeed say such a thing she would feel my wrath. Utterly inappropriate.

Make sure she doesn't get this teacher again next year and console yourselves with the fact that nobody ever asks to see your year 2 report. A report seems like a big thing at the time but it's really not.

I'd also make a note to talk to next year's teacher early on let him or her know that there was something of a personality clash with this year's teacher and that your daughter is keen to have a better year this year.

This post has been edited by BadCat: 06/12/2012, 08:44 AM

[zande]

Not precious at all imo. Sounds a lot like my DD's year 2 teacher last year who didn't like my DD and made her year at school miserable. Her teaching style was woeful too, there was a revolving door of complaints to the principal, but nothing ever happens. This woman has been even worse this year apparently (I have 2 friends with children in her class), one family have moved schools to get out of her class and another home-schools her child now. If my DD2 gets her for year 2 we are out of the school (we have a small school and she is the only year 2 teacher atm).

I feel your pain. Find out the teacher's take on things, but definitely advocate for your child. It would be helpful to also have a meeting early on in the year with the next teacher to get off on the right foot. My DD has had a fantastic year with a great teacher who has really helped to boost her confidence, which was seriously eroded last year. It broke my heart to be sending my DD off each day into a miserable environment.

[dsk72]

Teacher's response to me this morning was "Sometimes kids need to hear to the truth". She basically said that my DD repeatedly doesn't follow instructions and what do I expect her to do?

I had to self-medicate with some chocolate before continuing on to work!!!

I really don't know what to do as my DD has said teacher is going to a different school next year, however she is passing on notes to DD's next year teacher "to be aware of these tendencies". More than anything though, I'm really p*ssed off about the impact it has had on her emotionally.

School-work schmool-work - I can help her over the Summer holidays. She's reading at least 4.5 years above her age (she hit the test ceiling, so possibly higher) including her comprehension levels. Her maths is ahead in a few areas and behind in the mental areas (still finger counting, etc), so a bit gappy. BUT she only got 4 questions wrong on her end of year maths test (I THINK out of 30, so not too bad).

So my question is, do I talk to the student administrator to discuss the teacher's strategies that she's used and the impact it has had on my DD? I really don't want to be a PITA parent, I've tried not to get involved and just help my DD where I see she needs it out of class time, but this teacher seems determined with her ideas.

Cheers

[Lottie*]

i am no expert but i would say yes, go chat to them. You DD doesn't have a voice in all of this and i find it a bit unreasonable that if this was occurring so often why you didn't get put on notice of it. You could have worked with your DD to try and improve it over the school term if the teacher had spent 5 minutes writing a note to you or raised the issue with you at parent and child conference.

i don't think "telling it how it is" is actually the current method taught to teachers in this day and age, but i could be wrong. a tad on the brutal side and with an obvious impact on your little one. I would be mentioning this too.

[Becky Thatcher]

Teacher's response to me this morning was "Sometimes kids need to hear to the truth".

So my question is, do I talk to the student administrator to discuss the teacher's strategies that she's used and the impact it has had on my DD? I really don't want to be a PITA parent, I've tried not to get involved and just help my DD where I see she needs it out of class time, but this teacher seems determined with her ideas.

Cheers

I would and I have done so. Ask to see the principal.