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> Parenting experts - do they need to be parents themselves?

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A.K.A
post 13/12/2012, 06:47 PM
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As the title states, do you think so called parenting experts should be parents themselves? Does the number of children they have influence how you perceive them? If someone wrote a book on the dynamics of a large family and the only had one child would you think them unqualified?
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Sinister Bonnet
post 13/12/2012, 06:50 PM
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It would take a serious lot of convincing for me to see someone as an expert if they have not lived it. They can realistically be an expert on aspects of it but not the totality.
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Jemstar
post 13/12/2012, 06:57 PM
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Well it certainly helps with credibility.
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Frau Farbissina
post 13/12/2012, 06:59 PM
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good question. Not all experts in different fields have experienced first hand the topic they are an expert in. A lot of it would be based on research.
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scarfie
post 13/12/2012, 07:00 PM
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Not really. That would be like saying that a midwife who has not given birth can not be credible, or an OB (and lets face it, most are males) likewise couldn't be a credible practitioner if they have not experienced labour and birth themselves.

Most knowledge is gained through literature and then by practicing their area of expertise.

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Pooks*potters
post 13/12/2012, 07:00 PM
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I like to know what the person's "position" is, part of that is whether they have "lived experience" of what they are claiming expertise about. It doesn't mean I would dismiss them out of hand, if they had professional or research knowledge to share, but it would help me frame how to "digest" what they are telling me.

IME, some parenting experts WITH kids can be even more frustrating because they seem to think that what works for them and their kids has some kind of relevance to what will work for me and mine.
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BadCat
post 13/12/2012, 07:02 PM
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I don't believe there is any such thing as a parenting expert. Even if you managed to successfully raise your children you are not an expert on mine. If you've raised none at all I think you can have opinions and theories, and some may even be good, but you are not an expert.
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andyk
post 13/12/2012, 07:03 PM
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Absolutely!
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Filulah
post 13/12/2012, 07:04 PM
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Yep. To me, it would be like someone who had read a first year medical textbook telling a surgeon how to do his job. Actually, that's a really crappy analogy, because most (first-time) parents have no idea what they're doing (in a good way, i.e. they learn on the job). Just that parenting is something you have to have lived to have any idea what you're talking about.
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eyesabove
post 13/12/2012, 07:04 PM
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I think it depends on whether they are claiming an understanding of the personal feeling a parent would experience.

For example, as an educator I have toilet trained 100's of children and seen a huge variety of methods employed by parents over the years. I consider myself to have expertise in toilet training as a result of trial and error with many different children of different backgrounds, ages and temperaments - something that many parents can not claim. So I would believe my advice or suggestions carry a weight that most parents would not have had access to. A parent who has parented 3 or 4 children (or however many) and toilet trained a certain way with success, who then writes a book about it, does not have the same breadth and depth of variety I may have seen.

I don't claim one idea or parenting theory would work for any child/parent - you each find your own rhythm. What I can offer is ideas and suggestions or "expertise" that sits outside what you might ordinarily think of.

So yes. I think you can be a parenting expert without children, as long as you are not claiming to understand the unique emotional connection you have as a parent.
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