[Saecularis Angel...]

There have been...discussions....at my house this morning, and I'd like a reality check.

Scenario: Parent 1 has something planned which requires parent 2 to look after the 1 year old. Parent 2 proposes inviting over a friend to play Civilisation (a turn-based computer game). There are lots of factors which make catching up with this friend important at this time.

Parent 1 says, ok, but I will cancel my plans and baby-wrangle while you play computer games. Parent 2 gets really grumpy at parent 1's lack of trust, says that computer gaming of this sort does not entail ignoring the baby, parent 1 should do what was originally planned, all will be fine.

Parent 1 refuses to budge, says that computer gaming does not make for attentive parenting, and it's either one or the other but we can't both do what we want. Parent 2 makes plans for another day to save parent 1's plans, but is not happy about it.

What do you think? Gaming and parenting - compatible activities? Is parent 1 being precious and not trusting parent 2?

[mumofsky]

Im with parent 1 on this.

[Escapin]

DH, who is a keen but not currently active gamer, says you are right.

[katbalou]

I'm not a gamer, so I don't fully understand how involved this would be for Parent 2. But on the face of it, if I was Parent 1 and had plans I wouldn't change them. I would have to trust Parent 2 that they if they stuffed up with their expectations on the doability of it, they would have to deal with the fallout. I would stick to my plans.

[Saecularis Angel...]

DH, who is a keen but not currently active gamer, says you are right.

Ahh, does he assume I'm parent 1 or parent 2?

[mumto4boys]

I think it would depend on the parent themselves and the set up of the area the baby and computer gaming would be in.

Our kids are older now but it would have been doable in our house and as the baby/toddler would be in the same room without an escape route then they couldn't have gotten into too much trouble.

DH isn't really into computer games either so it's not like the house would burn down around him without him noticing.

[Rhoxie]

If it's night time and the baby will mostly be asleep I wouldn't have a problem with it. If it's day time then I'm with you.

My hubby likes his games and although it doesn't stop him looking after our children our children would prevent him from enjoying quality time with his friend and would interrupt the game.

[mum201]

There is no way you can game with a one year old to look after. If you blocked off all other rooms so toddler was confined to the living room he would skwark at being bored. If you gave him free range he would run around the house, climb onto th dining table and jump off (or something like that). Either way I would have an upset / hurt baby upon my hands when I got home .......

[~squiggle~]

DHis a gamer. The attention required to play is not compatible with baby wrangling. Regardless of that, most of his games are not suitable for children to view, so he plays only when they are asleep.

[bluecardigans]

I am with parent 2. Civilization can be paused without issue. I wouldn't be happy if my partner insinuated that I would neglect to care for my child.