[Tyrone Finkelmey...]

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This post has been edited by Tyrone Finkelmeyer: 26/03/2013, 08:17 PM

[~sydblue~]

I wouldn't force her. Not everyone goes to theirs.

What state are you in?
Because all the formals I have ever known or heard of, are held late in the year. Around november early december.

[Apageintime]

The Yr 12 formal is in March. DD#1 is adamant she isn't going.
My first instinct is to try and convince her (not 'make' her as I can't make her do anything).
DH says to leave her be and it's up to her.
Why doesn't she want to go? She is a through and through intellectual, nerdy type who has zero interest in socialising, dressing up, dancing etc. She hasn't worn a dress or skirt apart from her school uniform in years. She has four good friends who make up her entire social set at school and has no connection with the rest of her year level.

What would you do?

I'd suss out why she doesn't want to go - if its just wearing a dress, would she wear a nice suit instead? or is it because her other firends aren't going?

I had a friend in highschool who said the same thing, turns out she thought her parents couldn't afford a dress for her.

If she doesn't want to go, she doesn't have to. Would she have her 4 besties around a few weeks later for an activity she does enjoy? (maybe a night in a really nice hotel room for all of them or somethiong?)

[hoohoobump]

Leave it up to her. It's not like it's the last day of school and tied up to her graduation.

Give her a date to make her final decision - wouldn't want a change of heart at the 11th hour and have to scramble for dress etc.

[Avogadro]

I'd sit down and chat with her about it. What exactly are her concerns? It might be that she's worried about asking you to spend $$ on a dress she'll never wear again - in which case you can discuss between you about the money (just an example).

Ask her if her other friends are going.

But no, I wouldn't try to convince her but just make sure that she's saying "no" for legitimate reasons.

[BadCat]

I'd leave her be.

She sounds very much like me. I went to the formal against my better judgement because my friends wanted to go. Hell, I even wore a dress.

It was rubbish. I have no fond memories of it at all and wish I had stayed home.



This post has been edited by BadCat: 13/01/2013, 02:13 PM

[Propaganda]

I wouldn't make her go. If she's going to be bored and uncomfortable surrounded by people she doesn't really know or like, doing something she doesn't really enjoy, wearing clothing she would rather not be wearing, then I can't see that there'd be any benefit whatsoever.

[Old Grey Mare]

Why make her go and spend an excruciating evening and a load of cash pretending to be nice to a load of people she possibly doesn't like and in most cases will never have to see again?

[Malaya]

Are her friends going? If so I'd encourage her. If not I'd also encourage her and her friends to go. Does she get on with the rest of the year? No issues?

It's not the end of the world not to go but you don't want to regret not going either. If its not her usual thing I'd suggest going even more strongly. I'll go anywhere and do most things that may seem boring or unusual to some or something that tests my comfort zone. because you just never know what you're going to get out of it. More than likely it'll have a positive outcome.

Hope im making sense.

[choccy2]

Do ? I wouldn't do anything.

It's up to her - it's her formal surely she can decide for herself if she wants to go or not?