[cinderellainsydn...]

5yo DD has selected a present for her friend worth $90. She is having trouble letting go of the present.

There were tears followed by anger - she tried to hit me! Followed by time out. I tried to explain to her that everyone takes 'turns' in having birthdays, and we remembered her own birthday party and recalled all the presents.

But every couple of hours the cycle of tears and anger and time out starts all over again!

Talking about it isn't helping. I don't want to buy another present for DD just like the one for birthday girl to make it go away - she has many toys.

My suggestion of not going to party was met by: Can I keep the present then?

Please help - I can not think straight due to being worn out by the tantrums!

[~Supernova~]

My child wouldn't be keeping it. There's a good lesson to be learnt here! I'd just deal with the tantrums. No way, no how would I be giving in.

[Mumma3]

I'm confused. Do you mean you spent $90 on a gift for your 5yos friend?

[meggs1]

Go to the party and hand over the present and have a fun time or take the present back to the shop and stay home?

[The Old Bag]

I would say something like "I've said no and I mean no and I am not arguing with you anymore".

And ignore her completely if she mentions it again.

I think sometimes, we overthink and overtalk things when really kids just need to be told (nicely) they're being ridiculous and to STFU.

[~Supernova~]

.

I think sometimes, we overthink and overtalk things when really kids just need to be told (nicely) they're being ridiculous and to STFU.

[Excentrique]

Take the gift back to the shop and get something cheaper.

Then its not in the house and your DD doesn't need to be jealous of her friend.

IMO $90 is way to much to spend.

[PatG]

Tell her that no, she can not have the gift, no, we are not going to discuss it again and every time you bring it up/ask/whine about it you will lose a toy for x amount of time.

[Avogadro]

I would say something like "I've said no and I mean no and I am not arguing with you anymore".

And ignore her completely if she mentions it again.

I think sometimes, we overthink and overtalk things when really kids just need to be told (nicely) they're being ridiculous and to STFU.

[Georgie01]

I would say something like "I've said no and I mean no and I am not arguing with you anymore".

And put the present away where she can't get or see it until the party, no more discussion of the gift.

Tantrums in my house result in the child going to their room until they are ready to behave - even the four year olds understand. I do realise that there are some children that this approach doesn't work for though.