[Floss']

What has happened to DD1?
She has recently turned 3 and is going through the most frustrating phase (oh I hope it's a phase, please reassure me it's a phase!).

She is scared of EVERYTHING - dogs, cats (even though we have one), flies, the noise cicadas make, rain, the thought that fairies might come into her room , her scooter, her bike helmet, her swimming goggles, the slide at the park, having her hair washed, and the list goes on.

She won't do ANYTHING - she says "I don't want to do anything. ever. again" and I swear her eyes seem to glow red as she glares at me, kind of werewolf like....
She won't play at the park, play at Playgroup, swim in her lessons (she has been having lessons since she was 8 months old and now it's like she's never seen water in her life). This is also all tied into the fear thing.
She doesn't want to join in at Kindy (yesterday she sat and watched all the other kids playing).
We went to a birthday party recently and she refused to join in with the activities.
If I ask her to do something with me she says "I don't want to" then screams and carries on if I walk away from her.

And, she won't eat - don't get me started on the eating!

I'm not aware of anything happening that could have caused this fear and reluctance to participate in anything - she was a confident, happy, outgoing little girl just a few months ago.
I am at my wits end. In fact, I'm at such a loss with what to do it has forced me out of my EB lurker status

Please tell me this is normal behaviour for this age or I might have to leave home.
ps. feel free to provide any tips or hints to help us all get through this.

[kadoodle]

A sudden change, you say? What has happened in the last few months that would have upset her?

[EBeditor]

My three year old can be very stubborn and screechy too. I am not sure what the answer is, but I try to praise her for being well behaved around the house and brave if she is trying something new.

My DD stopped wanting to do ballet at 3 and stopped wanting to go to the weekly council activities at the local park, I didn't see the point in fighting about it so we stopped going. I can see that she's coming out of it again closer to 4.

[Mrs Manager]

Is she getting attention from you when she is scared? If you cuddle her, tell her it is ok etc maybe it is the cuddles she wants?

[Cooperdoo]

She turned 3 lol. All my kids have turned into little monsters at 3. I currently have a 3.5 year old who is making my life absolutely impossible. I can't wait until he grows up a bit and snaps out of it, like my others have at around 4-4.5

[Floss']

Not sure Kadoodle. It's not like there have been any major changes or issues that have arisen to bring about this behaviour change. She just seems to have lost all her confidence.

I offer her lots of cuddles and support and talk to her about the perceived "scary things" to try and get her to understand that she won't be hurt or they aren't real (or whatever the situation calls for).

I encourage her to join in and she sees how much fun everyone is having but I don't (and can't) force her - she's too stubborn for that! She just doesn't seem worried that she's missing out and I think she is just too scared/cautious/unconfident to give things a go.

She also stopped dancing at ballet too (even though ballet is her whole world - thanks Angelina) so I have pulled her out until she said she says she is ready to go again. However, I don't want to keep pulling her out of things - worried that will send the wrong message too.

[jupiter123]

She is scared of EVERYTHING - dogs, cats (even though we have one), flies, the noise cicadas make, rain, the thought that fairies might come into her room , her scooter, her bike helmet, her swimming goggles, the slide at the park, having her hair washed, and the list goes on.

She won't do ANYTHING - she says "I don't want to do anything. ever. again" and I swear her eyes seem to glow red as she glares at me, kind of werewolf like....

If I ask her to do something with me she says "I don't want to" then screams and carries on if I walk away from her.

And, she won't eat - don't get me started on the eating!

I am at my wits end.

Please tell me this is normal behaviour for this age or I might have to leave home.
ps. feel free to provide any tips or hints to help us all get through this.

Yes, Yes and Yes.

My DD is exactly the same I am am losing the plot very quickly.

To add to your list.

1. The same repetitive questions over and over again, even though she knows the answer and will tell you if you ask.
2. Everything is No or I cant or I wont or you do it.
3. If I ask her to try something she says I can't try.
4. If she has something she shouldn't have i.e. my phone she will throw it and then say HAHAHA with this wicked little grin on her face.

There has been a few major changes in the last 3 months, (we have moved interstate, I stopped working so am home everyday, no childcare) but she has adapted to these changes really well as it has put us closer to friends and family that she never had before.

Most of her behavior change has started in the last month when she turned 3 and I thought 2 was bad.

Please tell me there heads stop spinning and the devil leaves them at some stage.... i don't know how much longer I can go on with this lol

[squeekums]

DD will be 3 next month and in the last few months shes gone from sweet and nice to a total she-devil too.
Its just taken me almost an hour to get ready to go the shops cos it was nothing but 'NO NO NO' arrgh!
It better be a phase or I can see lots of wine being drunk around here lol
No advice, im stalking for that just sympathy lol

[veggiepatchfamil...]

Yes, Yes and Yes.

My DD is exactly the same I am am losing the plot very quickly.

To add to your list.

1. The same repetitive questions over and over again, even though she knows the answer and will tell you if you ask.
2. Everything is No or I cant or I wont or you do it.
3. If I ask her to try something she says I can't try.
4. If she has something she shouldn't have i.e. my phone she will throw it and then say HAHAHA with this wicked little grin on her face.

Agree to all!

We get a foot stomp with NEVER.EVER.AGAIN!!!

We're at 3.5, but it started about 6 months ago (DS2 was born 8 months ago) so not sure if a factor.
DS isn't really scared of things but does like to be stubborn about every little detail, and his realized he can say no. So my litre boy who used to do everything we asked, now just say, NO! Don't want to!
Hoping it passes soon too! It's just a phase- we just have to try not to throttle them before they grow put of it!

[Sweet like a lem...]

If it is a phase it's not one we went through - thankfully. If there was a build up leading to it I would pass it off as heightened awareness and leave it. I think fear of strange dogs and thunder is fairly normal but I would be very concerned if it came on suddenly and resulted in her shutting down and / or shutting out everything.

This post has been edited by ForsakenTruth: 07/02/2013, 11:53 AM