[wombat]

Just as the title says, in your experience is it expected that Christian women will automatically change their surname to that of their husband? I ask because it has never entered my mind that my faith would be questioned due to DH and I having different surnames, but within a new circle of friends I have that is what is ocurring. Anyone else have similar experiences? Not upset by it, just curious.

This post has been edited by wombat: 19/02/2013, 10:34 AM

[Z-girls rock]

I didnt change my lastname.

some people (I'm looking at you mother-in-law - in fact kind of all my in-laws) have given me a hard time about it. It doesnt have anything to do with Christanity because I am Buddhist and they are all either nothing or non-practicing Christians.

I think if people dont like your choices they will use whatever 'reasons' they want to try to make you feel bad about your choices and pressure you into conformity. Christian or non-Christian.

[s'peachykeen]

I think it's probably common in Christian circles for women to change their names when they marry. But you can tell 'em from me: if they think that's how you know if someone is genuine in their faith, they're doing it wrong

[elizabethany]

I would say that it is traditional to change your name, and there is a correlation between religion and conservatism. That being said, I would NEVER judge someones faith on whether they changed their name.

Actually, I would never judge anyones faith at all.

[opethmum]

I guess it is expected in Christian culture for women to change their name. The idea of being one flesh and the role of marriage in creating a family unit and being united under one name is why most women change their names or there is expectation for them to do so is there. For some churches it is the done thing and depending on their leanings of their understanding of marriage and the roles of husband and wife it is seen as poor form on the woman if she does not change her surname.
For some churches and cultures the surname is not the be all and end all of all things and happily get on with life.
I know in some Orthodox cultures that where in absence of a male to carry the surname to the next generation some women do not change their names and if they have a son then the surname is given to him and they give the father's surname as a middle name.

I say do what you feel that works for you and your situation in life and if you don't change your name post marriage that's a personal decision and I don't judge you at all.

[jill1972]

I'm a Christian & I don't think changing your name has anything to do with Christianity. I think it may be a bit of an outdated view & if you decide to have different surnames is no one's business but your own.



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[Iliketophaff]

I'm a Christian and I changed my name because DH is uber-conservative, not because of religion. I'm a feminist. Interestingly I made this decision after having too many drinks - made it easier to digest.

[Apageintime]

We're Catholic and I kept my own name.

In our circle of religious friends most people seem to keep their names on marriage and double barrell the kids.

[Jekaho]

My desire to change my name had nothing to do with my faith. But I can understand how people think of tradition being intertwined with religion.
I wouldn't even think of "questioning" someone's faith just because they don't take their husbands name. How bizarre!

[HGL]

I don't think an expectation for women to change their surnames is exclusive to Christianity. I think a number of people expect women to charge their name regardless of their religion.

Of course, I could open a can of worms and say 'some' religions and churches still have an idealogy that woman are second to man (Christian & non Christian religions) and expect women to obey their husbands, raise the children, change their name etc, but I won't.