[Mamaidh]

My 9 year old was firstly grabbed by the wrists and yanked twice, then hit by another child yesterday. She went to the teacher on duty and was told to go and tell the offender to not do it again. Am I overreacting in thinking this isn't good enough? I am all for children sorting things out for themselves, but surely physically hurting another child should be dealt with a bit more seriously? Kids get in more trouble than that for things like talking in class or forgetting their homework. Our school has 5 rules - #1 Keep your hands and feet to yourself.

Would like to hear other's opinions please

This post has been edited by Mamaidh: 28/02/2013, 01:09 PM

[Jersey Caramel]

At my son's school, any form of violence (one incident) goes straight to level 2 discipline which means reporting to the Stage Supervisor for 3 days and needs to demonstrate improved behavior, made to revise the school rules and consequences, and miss out on excursions and any non-essential activities during the 3 days. They're also taken out of the playground at lunch time for 3 days.

Obviously, I'd expect the playground teacher to get to the bottom of the story before implementing this (eg. was it actually a play wrestle/game that got out of hand rather than anything malicious) but I'm happy with the no-tolerance policy towards physical abuse at our school.

(ETA: I know from speaking to other parents that the Supervisor actually spends a lot of time with the child being 'disciplined' to actually get to the bottom of their issues, find techniques that will help them, build a relationship and rapport with them. I realised after I typed that it all sounds very punitive, but it is done in a positive way and all about remediation).

This post has been edited by Jersey Caramel: 28/02/2013, 01:11 PM

[justthegirls]

What would you like to have happened? I think that at age 9, kids should be able to try and work things out for themselves before involving the teacher (unless of course we're talking something more serious). Whilst violence isn't something to be taken lightly, what happened to just going and playing somewhere else?

[Mamaidh]

Personally, I think that

just going and playing somewhere else

is taking violence lightly! I believe that my children have a right to be safe in at school, and to me, this action has given the other child the message that it was ok to do that. I think that at a minimum, the teacher should have spoken to her and sent her to sit out for 10 minutes. Had it just been teasing, not including in a game, things like that, absolutely I am all for the children sorting it out for themselves (providing it is not in the form of on going bullying or more serious than just your average primary school tiff)

[justthegirls]

Yes they have a right to be safe, but at age 9, they're grade 3 or 4, and your daughter should be old enough to say to the other child to stop that. If it continued beyond that, then by all means get the teacher involved, but running to the teacher straight up just seems like kids aren't being given the skills to try and deal with these issues themselves. Kids are kids, and they sometimes get a bit rough through play.

[Mamaidh]

Fair point justthegirls. This was straight out vendictive "I hate you" followed by the physical attack so not just play turning a bit rough, but the teacher didn't ask any questions.

[Mummy Em]

I'd expect more. You'd never tell an adult who had been hit by another adult to just move away or tell the other child not to do it again - very dismissive.

OP what is the school's policy on these types of incidents?

[Copacetic]

Yes, you should expect more, but did you ask your daughter WHY this happened?

My 9 year old is a hitter, and went to mainstream school for a while, and yeah, a couple of kids got hit. Here's what I know: kids who hit NEVER hit for zero reason. It may not seem like a good reason, but there's always a reason.

[Mamaidh]

what is the school's policy on these types of incidents?

I thought that it was a 'red card' for incidents in the playground, which means trip to the office and note sent home to parents. I don't know if that is a straight out 'if you break rule #1' or just for the more extreme cases. However, we got a new principal last year and things have changed a bit, so not entirely sure now.

[fairyflossfart]

What would you like to have happened? I think that at age 9, kids should be able to try and work things out for themselves before involving the teacher (unless of course we're talking something more serious). Whilst violence isn't something to be taken lightly, what happened to just going and playing somewhere else?

Yeah, let them sort it out and then check the damage later in the sick bay.
Or let the little aggressor continue on their merry way to terrorising other children, instead of nipping it in the bud.