[~kitteh.hoardere...]

If it doesn't worry the cousin planning the 2nd wedding, then I don't see why it should worry the first.

I posted a few weeks ago asking about having weddings close to our friends. They are getting married in mid March (*I think* I know it's March, just not sure exactly when.) We want to get married mid April. It only affects 2 couples, one of which is the other bride and groom. After we've announced our engagement, then I will just check it's ok with them... probably more from a "will you be back from your honeymoon by then" angle. If they aren't, then they just won't be able to come. We are really restricted with when we can get married (due to work and DSDs.)

I would have said, it would be been courtesy to ask if it's ok, but TBH if bride#1 is already being a bridezilla, then I probably wouldn't ask either.

[Guest_mbride_*]

Drama queen. She needs to move on, there are bigger issues in life!

[chocolate_cake]

One of my close friends got married 3 weeks after us. We booked our flights home from our honeymoon so that we could attend.

We were also very excited to attend a wedding so soon after we had just gotten married- I loved it!

[mum of 3 kids]

If it doesn't worry the cousin planning the 2nd wedding, then I don't see why it should worry the first.

I would have said, it would be been courtesy to ask if it's ok, but TBH if bride#1 is already being a bridezilla, then I probably wouldn't ask either.

This is i think the real 'issue' is the fact the cousin did ask my friend if it was alright to plan the wedding for that date, 3 weeks later to her's (so IMO the cousin most likly thinks it is a wrong thing to do and wanted my friends blessing for it so if people do go 'oh 2 wedding withn a month' she can say well my cousin doesn't care why should you!) my friend is a really nice girl and i have never seen her so upset about it. She wanted to get married sooner but thought of a another cousin (they have) so planned her wedding 4 months after hers.

now my friend has her cousins MOTHER CRYING and calling her up about it as SHE isn't too happy with her responce of her daughter wanting her wedding then (as the cousin did ask her her views of it, why ask if your going to do it anyways?) i guess they didn't expect her to say that as she is a happy easy going girl. and now the aunty is telling my friend to move her date later as her daughter cannot wait that long to get married, (why is she in a hurry to get married i personally wonder.... she just turned 19, my friend is 26 and been going out with her BF for 5 yrs not 6months! (my friend's cousins family IS abit crazy IMO at there other sibing's engagement the guests were expected to bring a plate, only give money as a gift and if you give a present you must have a receipt with it so they can change it if they dont like it!!- she showed me the invitation!!) now that is definally crazy! and super rude!!! in the end of augement my friend told her whats her hurry and do it b4 hers!!

I don't think she is being a drama queen. I personally couldn't do it to our families or them, as I think it would be rude, expensive for te guests, and stealing of the thunder (as we would have been beforehand) our next month was also our (march 2012) due to a sibling of one of us being due in the middle of the month. We ended up with a wedding in dec 2011.
THANKYOU!!!!!! for agreeing!!
Italian weddings are expensive and I would never think of putting the wedding 3 weeks aftert cousins or 3 weeks before. (I did however jump the gun in my friends by 10 days earlier friends personally tend to be different because being a big Italian wedding probably half the guests will be invited to both.)

Definally a friend's wedding is a different story as they dont have the same relatives,but when it basically the same people coming for the wedding i still think its a no no.


This post has been edited by mum of 3 kids: 18/02/2012, 09:54 AM

[mum of 3 kids]

One of my close friends got married 3 weeks after us. We booked our flights home from our honeymoon so that we could attend.

We were also very excited to attend a wedding so soon after we had just gotten married- I loved it!

i don't think that is really the issue i guess it more the issue of it being the cousin and will be having basically the same people attend the wedding...

[~kitteh.hoardere...]

Sounds like she's afraid her cousin is going to have a better wedding and then people will think badly of her, or something along those lines.

Seriously, life is full of tragedy and loss and pain... this is not any of those things. She needs to get over it and start worrying about stuff worth worrying about, like famine, human rights, the environment, cruelty to animals, losing a loved one etc etc.

It's just a freaking wedding.

God help her when someone falls pregnant one month before her and steals the name she wanted for her baby since she 5!

[dimensionk]

I think 3 weeks is totally fine. However, she is entitled to feel upset, that's the thing about feelings.

We did this to my FH's sibling and partner. We became engaged a month after them and are having our wedding is 7 week weeks before theirs.

I do think they saw it as both cutting in, and being too close.

Our plan was already in place (including deposits) before they were engaged, but honestly, I don't think it would have been 'wrong' of us otherwise. Is there really a line? This is our lives. It's hard, after theirs would have been winter. I wouldn't want to delay it by 6 months because we have baby making plans and I'm concerned about fertility declining with age.

There's a limit to how much you can tailor your life to suit other people.

That being said, I feel terrible that we upset them. I hope they're okay with it now - they seem to be. I hope your friend becomes okay with her situation too. There's not probably much she can do about it. If the wedding is going to be in May 2013, people have 15 months to organise presents for two weddings. And as PPs have pointed out, perhaps she did this to make it easier with relatives flying over.