I am so sick of random people coming up to me and asking what's wrong with my child. He is taller then his age; no, he doesn't speak; yes, he is still in nappies; no, I won't smack him for having a sensory overload and having a meltdown; yes, I do need to take him shopping/ run errands with me as I'm a sole parent. The judgments never end! I don't need to hear that my child 'isn't normal', I live with him and what is normal anyway? I'm having the ASD assessment this week and I'm so worried about the outcome and how ex and his parents will take it. I've already been told by ex that if I hadn't left him, our child wouldn't have ASD. I'm worried about my own reaction and making sure the Psych doing the assessment knows all of DS' quirks so we can get an accurate assessment. I'm getting so sick of family putting their 2c in about what they believe is wrong. I was sure he was on the spectrum but everyone else has me doubting my own instincts.

You poor thing! Sounds like you are doing the best for your son -- try (as HARD as it is) to ignore the people who only bring you down. Having said that, you have every right to vent -- I'm sure the comments get OLD really fast!

Good luck with the assessment. I really hope that you are able to get some professional guidance that makes things easier for you & your son.

The people who you truely care about and who you know cares back, take the time to answer whatever questions they have. Everyone else tell them to F off !!!! I do

Im going to borrow that line

OP your ex and his family are delusional if they think you made your son ASD. Ignore the dumb and stupid comments coming from people. Noone except you and perhaps other parents travelling your journey know what it is like living with your concerns, wondering if your child is on the spectrum or if there is something else amiss.

There are some lovely ladies who have been there and will give you any advice you need right here. Just ask!!

LOVE IT!!!



Exactly, keep doing your best, he is a very lucky boy to have a caring mum like you

I could have written you post, OP.

Been struggling with the possibility of my DS being on the spectrum....at the high functioning end. We have the assessment on Friday.

Haven't spoken to my Dad in months as he thinks I should work less and smack more - which obviously will solve the problem!!! (Not!)

Haven't reallly spoken to my Mum either, as she supported his version of a heated phone conversation. It was so worth uprooting my whole family to return from the UK to Oz so I could get some support from my extended family....(Not!!)

So, I spend my time blinking back tears and stalking this forum to get some feelings of support (albeit reflected via the imperfect medium of the web)

I am eternally grateful for the info and support on this forum....and it is almost time to 'come out' and offer some empathetic support for people in the same boat. Especially those without partners to share the burden like yourself, OP.

In a strange way, I feel some kind of bond with those going through the assessment at the same time as me. Like a perverse kind of 'birth' group. Iykwim???

Thanks everyone. Our assessment is on Friday. I'm so exhausted thanks to illness after illness atm so DS hasn't been in childcare for weeks and I haven't had a break. I'm also preparing for court (custody) so my stress levels are through the roof and on top, finding out my child's father is popping out more kids to randoms with no concern for children he already has. DS has had a really bad day today. We have had meltdown after meltdown and I had quite a few appointments. Was told to shut my kid up in Centrelink.

DS was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum today. I will get the full report in a few weeks but Psych thinks its moderate functioning, not high functioning like I was thinking. I was kind of expecting a positive diagnosis but still feels like I have been kicked in the guts.

Oh dude that is a kick in the guts. I am sorry but I hope it will lead to better things for your kid.

I am joining smallwordsplease in sending you a hug. It can totally be a kick in the gut.

Not to sugar coat anything, but hopefully now that you have the diagnosis and some direction from a trusted professional, you can really start to get the help for your son that he deserves.

I'm sorry that you have to deal with so much other stress (horrible ex, insensitive people) in the process. There are a lot of really lovely parents on this board who can relate to your feelings and experiences. Please lean on this gang as much as you need to in the days/weeks/months ahead.

xx

Its nearly 2 years since my son was diagnosed with autism. Since then he has made a lot of progress with getting very good early intervention. He starts school next year, which is scary but he will get help because he has a diagnosis. Its been a long 2 years but it would have been much longer and more stressful without the diagnosis and EI.

Getting a dx means you start to move forward, get help for your child and not doubt your parenting abilities quite so much. There will always be people who don't understand or criticize you and your child. Try to ignore them as you are making a big difference to the quality of your child's life by finding out what is going on with them and by trying to help them.

From one SN mum to all the other SN parents, I send you big hugs. If you were here my son would give you big hugs and kisses and tell you he likes you.

Thanks. Ex knew we had the appointment yesterday and he hasn't even bothered to contact and see what happened and yet every member of my family contacted me. Some people really shouldn't be parents. Obviously in exs case, when a new child comes along, the last one is discarded. I'm off to see my lawyer this week to file the papers to go for sole parental.