I finally plucked up the courage & took DD to the GP to see what he thought about DD and her lack of words. DD really only says Mumma & Dadda & even then I am not sure that she is using them in the correct context. Our GP wasn't overly concerned & wants to reassess when she is 21 months. She may have a few other words but are not exactly decipherable so we aren't sure. She does use baby talk & this has increased lately.

I am not sure that I even have a point to this post except I am anxious & worried. I think DD has a few quirks aside from her language but DH thinks I am over reacting. DD is very social but doesn't seem to be able to play "nicely" with other kids. But, she is a toddler so maybe this is normal. We were going to playgroup but I found this really hard as DD kisses & cuddles the other kids even when they are trying to escape or she hits and pulls hair. As I have a baby as well I found it really hard to control her while tending to to the baby who can be fussy at times. I have often considered that DD has some ASD traits but in other ways no as she is really "friendly" if that makes sense. (Not wanting to offend anyone by implying that ASD kids aren't friendly - finding it hard to convey my point. Sorry for the long ramble).

How have others handled waiting & what do you think I should tell people when they ask why DD isn't talking yet?

Thanks & sorry for the long ramble.

Seriously, I wouldn't be too worried just yet.
Some kids are just late in the development area of talking and some are advanced. The same way some walk earlier than others.

DGD knows the words I just think she just doesn't bother using them. She won't say please for her mum, yet the other day she pointed to something she wanted and I told her she had to say please. She looked at me then looked at the item and said "Please."

MissMeow. Our consistent reply to questions like yours is to check it out and if possible do not delay - no matter what your concern or area of note is

Go and see your maternal and child health nurse (or equivalent) and ask for a developmental assessment. It might be called a Bridgance Screen or she might use a different one.

The benefit of this is that the screen will report on observations, not opinions or "this is what I think".

Developmental screens are checked accross thousands of thildren without developmental delays, typically they won't diagnose anything, but they will detect areas for futher investigation.

Some children who have no developmental issues will be late talkers, but for children with developmental issues the speech can be a symptom/feature of an underlying condition.

Further, as all of us with children with disabilities can attest to, the diagnosis process can be long, and getting into services even longer. This is why we typically suggest to start asking questions early. Do not take a "wait and see" approach without there being a clear reason for this - and you weren't given one.

No offense is taken about the ASD comments - nothing we haven't been through ourselves before!

Don't wait. Go see your MCHN. And if the MCHN turns out to be useless, request a second screen by a different person - you are entitled to it.

Edited to add:
Indignantly right - no offense, but it isn't a matter of being worried. It's about getting factual observations of the child and using this information to determine a course of action - which may well be no action required. it's about identifying cases of developemental delay EARLY so that appropriate intervention can commence.

having been told with our first that it's just normal and other kids are like that - then when we finally went to the speech therapy assessment at 3yo to be told he did in fact have a speech delay and it would be a wait of around 6 mo before we could see anyone i would suggest follow your gut and do something about it sooner rather than later - even if you're just setting your mind at ease by doing it

if you're canberra there are drop in clinics you can attend regularly

I had people voicing their concern about DS#1 not talking, but then when I spoke with others or posted on EB about my concern I had others telling me not to worry, he was just a late developer and would get there eventually so this was my reply to those that asked about him not talking yet.

Listen to your own instincts. My MCHN and GP did not think I had anything to worry about with DS#1. I still asked for a referral to a speech therapist and it was there we started on a path to a diagnosis.

I think it is better to see specialist/development paed and make sure that there are no development issues, than leave it for longer and them be further behind.

Have just read Duffy's reply and I absolutely agree

Hi Miss Meow:

My friend Duffy has captured my feelings so well. I cannot stress the importance of acting upon your "niggling concerns" and seeing someone who is qualified to offer you guidance and support (if needed).
We have had a big thread going about this very topic:

http://www.essentialbaby.com.au/forums/ind...howtopic=845645

You have nothing to lose & potentially much to gain by investigating your concerns. If your DD does in fact have a speech delay and/or other issues, you will have flagged them very early, when it's easiest to intervene. And, if she is just a late bloomer...terrific! Now you have some reassurances from a professional that you need not stress.

idignantlyright, I appreciate that you are trying to keep the OP from stressing , but for the very reason that Duffy has suggested, we should be encouraging parents to act upon their concerns. If you visit the thread above, you will see many anecdotes of people (like me) who were told not to worry/she'll catch up in her own time/Einstein didn't speak till he was four, etc. etc. Parents tend to lock in on those assurances -- that's human nature -- which can cause them to lose potentially valuable time in seeking answers.

Miss Meow, with regards to how to respond to questions -- you should say/not say as much as you are comfortable sharing. My standard reply when DD was 2 (and still not really talking) was "She might be a late talker, or she might have a speech delay, which is why were getting things checked out." Of course, then you open yourself up to people telling you about little Le-a in their mothers' group, who didn't speak until she was 5 and now has her own talk show!

Best of luck to you!

I thought my son was a late talker and had his hearing check because he didn't appear to hear us. Australian Hearing can do hearing tests for kids under 3 for free as long as you get a referral from your GP. Your GP can also refer you to a speech pathologist using the Enhanced Primary Care plan which means you get 5 Medicare subsidised visits. A speech pathologist will have a much better idea of why your daughter isn't talking than a GP.

It can't hurt to get a speechie to check DD out. A child health nurse at the public hospital can also refer DD to a speechie but the public system takes forever. Christmas will also slow things down. If your GP doesn't think a referral is necessary tell them its for your peace of mind.

My son has verbal dyspraxia which means his mouth and tongue has trouble working what to do to make words. He also has autism which further complicates things. I wish I had done something earlier just so he had more of a head start in getting help. It could be your DD is a late talker and she doesn't need help which would be fantastic. If there is a problem then the sooner she gets help the better it is for her.

Sorry if I come over a bit strong but I still kick myself every now and again for not getting my little guy help earlier.

Good luck.

My DD2 was the very same, I felt ill with worry but i was told by my GP there was nothing to worry about and they wouldn't see it as a concern until she was 3. As soon as she turned 2 (obviously no to the day lol) We couldn't shut her up, she was using full sentences in the right context etc. She is such a bright little thing. I know how worried you are and fingers crossed your DD will be like mine and suddenly surprise you

What you have written here can describe my almost 25 month old DD2.

She is fairly non-verbal (says "mum" in a very weird way and daddy. In the last few weeks she has developed a word for dogs (Didi as our dog is called Didi so all dogs are Didi) and Bobble (bottle). Other than that it is all baby gibberish.

She can be over loving but most of the time she is more abusive than anything. She thinks nothing of walking over to DD1 and pulling her hair or hitting her head with a tape measure. She has no fear and likes to head-butt everything.

Dont get me started on the trantrums but she has mega meltdowns in crowded situations....especially at the wiggles concert until the wiggles came on stage and then she was in her own little world.

What did I do about it??? As soon as I was concerned about her I talked to the paediatrician dealing with DD1 as we dont have a developmental paediatrician here. He immediately got her into speech and OT where it was revealed that she has mild delays. Physio wasnt required she has no delays there.

We completed a PDD assessment where she came out as moderate and the paediatrician has now put her on the list to be assessed by the DSC team for autism although I may be holding off on that for a bit. We are going to QLD next year so I am thinking of taking her to see my sisters developmental paediatrician for a more thorough review.

So what would I recommend? Start looking into it NOW and get some therapies. You will be amazed at how early intervention can help. DD2 is very good with her hands so we are teaching her Makaton to try and bridge the language delay gap.

As for what to tell people? Every child is different and you may find in time your DD will find her voice. If not, who cares? What business is it of theirs? Maybe just tell them that as a parent you are looking into it as you dont know why she is delayed but you are loving her the way you always would if you want to tell them anything at all but remember you do not have to justify anything.

Goodluck!!

My DS is 23 months and I was quite concerned about his speech, and as PPs suggested followed my instincts and got it checked out by GP and nurse that we see. They told us to wait another 6 months before we get overly concerned. Our problem isn't so much his speech acquisition, but his pronounciation. We found he inhales instead of exhales with some words, and many of his words are indecipherable. I wasn't totally comforted at waiting another 6 months if it's something that should be addressed now, but doctor convinced us there wasn't much that could be done at this point anyway... She said it's likely he'll improve in time.

It's definitely worth just dropping in to see your GP or similar, it will put your mind at rest in any case.

If it gives you any comfort, my friend's daughter was 2 with only saying only Dadda and nothing else, they took her to see speech pathologist, but within a few days she started speaking, and within 6 weeks, was speaking in sentences. Not to say based on that you shouldn't seek help, but sometimes kids do just speak in their own time!

OP:

A few other thoughts:

My DS wasn't speaking at 2. Because of our daughter having ASD, I was extra cautious & took him to a speech therapist. His receptive language was excellent (that is, he understood everything), but he was slightly behind in his expressive. A few sessions with the speechie (just to be on the safe side) and things clicked... I now have a 3-year-old motor-mouth on my hands. So yes, as others have mentioned, some kids will just develop in their own time. My daughter, in contrast, really DID (and does) have issues, so I'm glad that we caught them early. She is thriving with early intervention.

Duffy mentioned the Brigance Assessment, which is a commonly used developmental screening tool that can help flag potential issues. It is not a diagnostic tool but rather a screening device.

For ASD-specific concerns, there is a screening tool that is very popular in the U.S. called the M-CHAT, which can be used on kids 16-30 months old to flag potential risk of an autism spectrum disorder. I am sharing it below with the major caveat that this type of tool should be administered by a qualified professional -- however, the content does have value for us laypeople, as it sets forth the types of things that a medical doctor/psychologist might be looking for during an ASD assessment.

http://www.ei-resource.org/m%11chat:-autism-questionnaire/

Best of luck with your sweet little girl & hope you get some answers soon!

Like BMJ, I have a child on the autistic spectrum and I felt super stressed about my DS who is 20 months and not saying a lot. It didn't help that a student speech therapist who saw him once for babysitting purposes only told me he was severely language delayed. Anyway, I spoke to a qualified speech therapist and when he turns 2 if he hasn't increased his vocab then we will meet again. However, he ticks absolutely no other boxes for autism spectrum behaviours. If he did I would be taking things further.

I'd agree with all posters that say to get a referral and see someone well qualified as quick as you can. Don't wait for the public system, there are private developmental paediatricians or speech therapists that can give you a quick assessment. Better to address any problems early. My son has mild autism, and I thank god that I didn't let my GP fob me off with a wait and see (as she wanted to do) but insisted on a referral to a speechie and a developmental paediatrician when he was 2. I'm not saying your child has a problem, but the earlier the better for any kind of intervention if it is necessary.

The others have given you some brilliant responses, and I agree that it would be a good idea to seek professional opinion.



I just wanted to mention in response to this that my DS with ASD is if anything overly friendly & seeks social interaction. He has no idea of stranger danger, he will approach and be friendly with anyone. It's the quality of his social interactions that are impaired, not that he doesn't make them. I deluded myself that he wasn't on the spectrum for a very long time due to misconception about what the traits actually are. It's a good example of the fact that it's a very broad spectrum, and children with ASD can be very much one way or very much the other with respect to lots of the traits.

Posted this in the ASD sig thread. Repeated at BMJ's request:

And MissMeow - good on you for having the balls to take the 1st step and ask. We are by no means experts, but as a bunch we are pretty clued in.

Just remember though, you can get great Peads/MCHNurses/speech paths and OTs and you can also get duds. We were lucky that our MCHN was a good one (I guess that's why I suggest it as a starting point) but I know others have had duds - duds come in all forms, if you are blown off ask for reasons, rather than opinion. A legit reason is "because I have check your child against all other milestones and she is meeting them all". A dud reason is "because I don't think ASD should be dxd before age 2,3,4,6" or "let's just wait and see".

(sorry for the bluntness - it's the way I am)

Thanks for all the replies, much appreciated. I have booked DD in to see the Child health nurse next week. You have spurred me on to do it as I wasn't happy to wait like my GP wanted I would go mad waiting till late January.




Thanks, what you say is very true & there is no clear reason to wait.




Read that thread & had some really interesting stuff in it & bumped it back up so others still see it. I don't get on here that much these days so do miss a lot of things so by bumping others might see it that haven't yet.
I am anticipating a few "comments" at Christmas time as both my SIL & sister are coming home from overseas & am guessing they will ask. My nephew is 2 and talks really well so I am sure she will notice & comment. I will talk with DH & we will decide what our answer is but I like your suggestion very much.



Thanks for that link, very interesting.




You are very right about the misconceptions about ASD traits my GP was quite confident that ASD was not an issue for us as she is so confident & social.

Let us know how you go with the Child Health nurse - I'm especially interested because in Vic a big project ran a few years back which I suspect is why our MCHN picked up on DS when she did (she'd picked up on it earlier, but DH and I were in denial so we left it a few months - against her advice might I add)

Just updating as went he ECHN today. ECHN believes that DD definitely has a language delay. She has virtually no words and what may actually be words are not used in the correct context.

The ECHN was nice but she has told me to go back to my GP and politely demand a referral to a speech pathologist & a referral for a hearing test. She believes this is my best starting point and while ASD or something else entirely may eventuate she thinks this is what I should do first. I am going to call my GP in a minute to try to get an appointment. She wants me to see her again in a month to see where we are at. She also gave me a questionaire to do that shows all areas of development, I am to take that back to her when I see her & show the speech pathologist.

I feel strange. Yes my thoughts have been validated but my poor little girl.

MissMeow - it's really really hard when those first questions are raised, you go off because you know that's what a "good parent" does, but you are desperately desperately hoping that you'll be told "it's all good, don't worry about it" and when you're not - you cry, because your baby while always perfect to you, has a problem - it may be a big one, it may be a little one, but suddenly there's something, in some ways it's like somebody broke your baby.

I adore my big man, he's taught me so many things and I'm a better person for it BUT I am so heartbroken and so angry about our recent diagnosis and what came before. And that's normal, it's OK to feel that way.

Ang

Thanks Mamma2miracles.

DH is pretty well in denial & thinks she is fine & we should wait till she is older to do anythig if need be. I am gutted, heart broken and numb???? That probably sounds reall odd but it is what I am feeling.
DH is happy forme to go back to the GP if I want but he is sure that I am wasting my time. Don't know what to do. Should IO go or wait to see what DH thinks in a little bit of time. Christmas is so close though so we may end up having to wait till next year as our GP closes soon for holidays.

Sorry to vent away but I haven't spoken to anyone in real life yet just DH so I am just getting it out.

Missmeow - I just came across this thread and I think you are doing exactly the right thing. I would press on now and get her seen asap. If you get an appointment now rather than wait til after Christmas it could save you weeks or months. Dads are very good at denial and your DH needs to deal with it in his way and that may be to be in denial, but what your daughter may (or may not) need is some help and the sooner it comes the better for her in the long run. If I were you I'd tell your DH you want to be on the safe side and so you are going to continue. I know its hard not being on the same page about things like this.

Just letting you know that I am one of those with two kids with late speech development who did 'catch up' in their own time. It is still possible but you are absolutely doing the right thing. Your mother's intuition is the most valuable thing to your daughter right now and its telling you something is not quite right so you need to listen to that. I do know how hard it is to be told there might be a problem. Rest assured you will have lots of support on EB if it turns out that she does.

All the best!

I would press ahead too. DH was in denial at the start as well, I explained it to him by saying look, if we get him help now and it turns out we didn't need it, what have we lost BUT if he does need help and we don't get onto it as soon as possible, we've lost valuable time and that's not fair to him, early intervention is the best possible treatment for any developmental problems. I'd prefer to waste some of MY time and money rather than deprive my child of something they ended up needing badly but I didn't do it at the time.

Missmeow - if you are in Vic you don't need a referral to either a speechy or a for a hearing test - if in Melb they are avail at audiology centres and are bulk billed for children. Our local public hospital that offers public speech services also takes self referrals - yours might be the same (of course depending where you are).

Good luck

Miss Meow:

First of all, a big hug to you. It is always hard to contemplate that your child might have an issue.

I echo everything that Kay1 and mamma2miracles have said. Please trust your gut on this one and push ahead with the appointments as soon as possible. If you make the calls now, you might be able to get in before Christmas or at least in January. Holding off until the new year might cost you very valuable time.

With my daughter's ASD, my husband was in complete denial initially. That was really, really hard on me, but I trusted my mother's instinct, pushed ahead with the assessent, and am I glad that I did! My husband didn't come to terms with her issues until we received the formal diagnosis. Anecdotally, I have now come to realize that it is not uncommon at all for fathers to go into the denial mode ("Oh, she'll be all right.")

Speech delays are often something that can be addressed very effectively by early intervention. So if your daughter does in fact have an issue (as opposed to being a late bloomer), the sooner you get started, the better.

For what it's worth -- I have had one of each: a child who was a late bloomer speaking & is now a virtual chatterbox (we saw a speech therapist for about 3 months as a precautionary measure)....and a child who has ASD and is now also a virtual chatterbox thanks to early intervention!

Best of luck & please let us know how things go.