Thank god for grandparents

Essential Baby blogger Amity Dry

The last few weeks have been extremely busy for me so I am writing this post, at the very last minute, while at my parent's house. I have lugged my computer over here because here I find something worth its weight in gold... attentive Grandparents. Attentive grandparents who will amuse my child while I do some work, or even have a bit of time to myself. And today I am reminded again just how lucky I am to have them.

When we had Jamison we had been happily living in Sydney for 12 years, while the rest of our family was in Adelaide, a city neither of us were in any hurry to move back to. We were in a small water front apartment that, while beautiful, had no parking, no bath, no laundry and no fence between us and the harbour. We adored that apartment, but knew it was completely impractical for a child, so we reasoned we would consider moving once our new baby started crawling. We didn't even make it that long. 7 months after Jamison was born we packed up our life and moved back to Adelaide. The lure was just too strong. We could have resisted the idea of a bigger house, cheaper cost of living and lazy Sundays sipping wine at gorgeous McLaren Vale wineries, but the promise of unlimited support and free baby-sitting from our families sealed the deal.

That was nearly two and a half years ago and I have not regretted our decision once. While Adelaide is a great city to raise a family (don't bag it unless you've been there people!) what has been so rewarding about our life here is the amount of quality time Jamison gets to spend with his grandparents, aunties, uncles and cousins. Seeing him form such special relationships with them has been wonderful and seeing the joy he brings to my parents lives is really heart warming. Hopefully it also helps to make up for all the frustration and sleepless nights I caused them throughout my own childhood!

Both my and Phil's parents seem to have endless patience with Jamison and their relationship is uncomplicated and mutually adoring. My Dad will play outside with him for hours, hitting the cricket bat and doing the gardening together, and my mum gives him more kisses and cuddles than I ever remember getting from her as a child. She was probably too busy then. Or perhaps she just appreciates those little moments more as a Grandmother because she knows first hand that they grow up way too soon.

Research commissioned last year by the federal Government suggests that these little moments are not only rewarding for a Grandparent, they are also extremely beneficial to a child's development. Growing Up in Australia: The Longitudinal Study of Australian Children, says that time spent with Grandparents plays an important role in a child's physical, cognitive and social development. It also found that children between three and 19 months scored better on most learning tests when they had been cared for by family and friends other than their parents.

Reading this study makes me feel even more fortunate that we have Grandparents in our lives, as I know many families are not so lucky. I honestly don't know how I would get anything done if we were still in Sydney and I didn't have my family to call on. But I know we would have managed, just as all the families who can't rely on family support do, it just would have been so much harder.

But it's not just the free baby-sitting I appreciate (although I really, really do appreciate it!) it is the richness that these relationships bring to my son's life.

I have many happy memories from my childhood of days spent at the zoo with my Grandparents and summer holidays at the beach with my cousins and I am so glad my son will also grow up with memories such as this. I am lucky enough to still have both my Grandmothers in my life and they are so important to me, teaching me lessons that can only come from age and experience and loving me unconditionally.

We place some much value on youth in today's society, but the relationships with our elders are so important and I am thankful Jamison has so many elders in his life. Seeing both his and his grandparents faces light up when they see each other is more than worth leaving our gorgeous waterfront Sydney apartment for - although I wouldn't mind still having it for holidays!

Do you have help from your extended family with raising your children? And if not, who are the people you turn to for help. I'd love to hear your comments.

Comment on Amity's blog here.